Chapter 23
Sister Knows Best
? I Almost Do - Taylor Swift
Callie
I’ve just finished setting up for this week’s story time when a familiar little girl with bouncing blonde pigtails bounds up to me and wraps herself around my legs.
I greet her with a warm smile. “Hey there, Emmy Lou!”
My heart leaps in my chest at the thought that Jaxon is here with the girls.
It’s been a full day since I left him in the office.
I had good reason, but distance hasn’t dulled my desire for him.
The ache is incessant. Last night, I thought about trailing across the hall and slipping into his bed, but I convinced myself not to go.
I glance up in search of him, but he’s not there. Olivia is standing before me, holding a squirming Gracie in her arms. I feel guilty for the momentary disappointment and plaster on a smile for Olivia’s benefit.
“Hey, Callie,” Olivia says, pulling me in for a one-armed hug while Gracie clings to her mom’s shoulder with her thumb in her mouth. She’s the spitting image of Wilder, but she has Olivia’s eyes. “Emmy’s been learning how to read a calendar, and she’s figured out that Tuesdays are Callie days.”
“I’m honored.” I squat down to Emmy’s level and poke her button nose. “Would you like to help me with story time today?”
“Really?” Her body practically vibrates with excitement as she clutches her hands to her chest.
“Absolutely. I could really use the help.”
She glances at Olivia, who gives her an approving nod. “Go on. I’ll just be over here with Gracie,” she says, gesturing toward one of the nearby armchairs. “Have fun.”
I pull up a small stool beside my rocking chair and help Emmy onto it. She does an adorable little shoulder shimmy.
“I have a very big job for you,” I tell her, holding out a white, fluffy puppet. “Think you can make this bunny hop?”
She places it on her small hand, and it stretches all the way to her elbow. It’s almost comically big for her, but she doesn’t seem to mind. She bounces her arm up and down and experimentally flaps the mouth open and shut. “Like this?”
“That’s perfect! When I start to sing the bunny’s song, you hop along with it, ok?”
She nods and swings her legs while we wait for the rest of the crowd to filter in. I secretly hope Jaxon shows up, but he remains painfully absent.
Emmy does an amazing job as the bunny, and when story time is over, she wraps her little arms around me and gives me a big hug. My chest tightens as I hug her back and soak up the easy affection.
Olivia’s still perched in the chair as Gracie tries to wriggle out of her hold.
“Sissy,” Emmy says. “Come here!” Emmy holds out her arms a few feet away from the chair, and Olivia places Gracie on her feet between her legs, pausing to steady her balance.
Gracie takes one step, still clinging to Olivia’s finger.
Then she takes another, loosening her grip.
I pull out my phone just in time to start recording.
A cheesy grin spreads across her sweet face, and she stomps toward Emmy with quick, unsure strides.
After what amounts to five or six full steps, Emmy catches her in her arms and squeezes her.
“You did it!” Emmy says.
Olivia’s eyes glisten as she holds her hands up to her face. She whispers, “Oh my god. Wilder’s gonna lose it. I can’t believe he missed her first steps.”
I turn my phone so she can see the video. “I caught most of it. But I can totally keep a secret, and we can pretend this never happened.”
“There isn’t a snowball’s chance in hell Emmy’s gonna keep quiet about this.” She speaks in a hushed voice, so Emmy doesn’t hear. She’s too preoccupied making Gracie laugh with the bunny puppet anyway.
She tugs on my hand and drags me away from the girls, keeping them out of earshot but within view.
She waggles her eyebrows. “So… how did it go the other night? Did it work?”
I probably should’ve seen this coming.
“Oh, it worked alright. Right up until I opened my big mouth and ruined it.”
“I doubt your mouth was the problem,” Olivia quips. “But go on.”
I glance up and shake my head, sighing. “That part was fine—amazing, even—but when we finished, I saw a picture on his bookshelf, and I asked him about it. He shut down immediately.”
“Oh, Jax,” Olivia says breathily, squeezing my hand. It’s a comforting gesture I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to. “It’s not you. I don’t know the full story, but he’s got a lot of unresolved trauma.”
I tilt my head from side to side. “I get that, I just… I thought we were in a good place. I’ve already told him about my scars, and he knows at least some of what I’ve been through. I guess I was just hoping for some sort of reciprocity.”
“Give him time. He’ll come around. You two are good for each other.”
I don’t have it in me to argue the point. It’s just as well since Olivia doesn’t wait for me to respond.
“If he’s anything like his brother, it might take him a while to catch up, but he’ll get there. Those Hayes men tend to bottle shit up. Or maybe it’s just men in general.” She peers around me at the girls still playing on the rug. “They’re worth it, though.”
Yeah. I think he might be.
Jaxon
I stretch back in my office chair and close my eyes.
Callie’s been keeping her distance, and I can’t say I blame her.
I really stepped in it this time. Atticus mewls under my feet.
He’s been extra clingy lately, and I’m grateful for the company, but he’s a constant reminder of my fuck up.
Every time he paws at my leg, I swear he’s judging me.
My phone chimes with a text, and I bolt upright. It’s embarrassing how quickly I snatch it up, and even more embarrassing how disappointed I am when it’s not Callie, but the family group chat.
Olivia: You’re a dumbass, Jaxon Hayes.
Griffin: You’re just figuring that out now?
Wilder: What’d he do this time?
An image pops up on my screen, stealing my breath.
It’s Callie in the library during story time.
She has Emmy by her side, an oversized puppet on her arm.
They both wear bright smiles as Callie holds out the book so the crowd can see the illustration.
Emmy’s looking up at my girl like she hung the fucking moon. I’m not convinced she didn’t.
Olivia: If you let this woman get away I’ll never forgive you.
Wilder: Callie’s family now. She’s not going anywhere.
Griffin: Jaxy on the other hand…
Ruby: I’m so late to this party, but I’m here for Jax and the hot librarian.
Jaxon: You can all kiss my ass.
Wilder: You better watch how you speak to my wife.
Ruby: Hey, I’m on your side.
Jaxon: Except you. You’re still my favorite.
Atticus hops onto my lap and glares at me.
“What do you want me to do? She won’t talk to me.”
Not that I’ve tried all that hard. I sent her a text asking if she wanted me to pick up dinner last night, and she didn’t respond.
Then this morning, I grabbed her favorite coffee from Chapters and Brews, but she was already gone by the time I got back with it.
The only sign she’s been here at all is the half-empty jar of pickles in the fridge.
It was full when I placed it there the day before.
I can take a hint, but it stings.
I mentally curse Griffin for getting her car fixed. If I were still driving her around, she’d have no choice but to talk to me.
I exit out of the sibling group chat and send a private text to Ruby.
Jaxon: Are you home?
Ruby: If by home you mean the penthouse, then yes.
Jaxon: See you in an hour.
Ruby: Drive safe.
The hour-long drive to Nashville gives me too much time to think.
I convince myself to turn around no less than four times, then talk myself out of it while I spiral over every moment I’ve spent with Callie the last few months.
By the time I arrive at Ruby’s penthouse, my mind is a jumbled mess of thoughts and emotions, none of which seem to make any sense.
I give her bodyguard, Nico, a curt nod as I exit the elevator on the penthouse level with a stack of takeout boxes in hand.
I hand him one.
“Thanks,” he says.
He’s a man of few words, and intimidating as hell, but he protects my sister. That’s good enough for me.
When the door swings open, Ruby pulls me in for a crushing hug.
I laugh and pat the top of her head with my free hand. “What was that for?”
“I saw the Gloria’s takeout boxes on the security cam.”
I narrow my eyes at her.
“And I missed you,” she admits. “Come in.”
I spread out all of the takeout boxes on the coffee table. Ruby pours me a glass of bourbon and slides it over to me, then she takes a seat, leaving one empty cushion between us.
As I dig into the steak tacos, she scoops a chip into a bowl of guac and covers her mouth as she chews. Swallowing, she says, “So. Tell me about Callie.”
I can’t stop the stupid grin that spreads across my face, but it falters when I remember how badly I fumbled the ball.
“Oh shit. You’ve got it bad.”
“You’re not wrong.” I tilt my head to the side and let out a ragged sigh. “She’s… fuck, Ruby. She’s incredible. At first, she comes off shy and reserved, but there’s this fire inside of her just waiting to be unleashed. She’s smart as hell, and funny in a clever way.”
“And beautiful.” Ruby gives me a sidelong glance.
“Gorgeous,” I counter, tapping my fingers against the side of my glass. “But it’s her heart more than anything that attracted me in the first place.”
“So, what’s the issue?”
“I fucked up.”
“As in you lied to her fucked up, or cheated on her fucked up?”
I take a sip of my bourbon and recline against the cushions. “She asked about Ryan.”
Ruby’s mouth makes an O-shape before she pinches her lips together.
She was sixteen when Ryan died, and she knows how much it messed me up.
The five-year age gap between us didn’t stop her from trying to bring me back from the brink of self-destruction.
She was and still is a grounding point for me.
“I’m guessing you didn’t tell her about him?” There’s a tinge of disappointment to her voice that I hadn’t expected.
“What was I supposed to say? ‘My best friend died because of me, and I’ve never gotten over it?’”
“How about ‘I lost my best friend in a tragic accident, and I can’t stop blaming myself even though I couldn’t have prevented it?’”
I down the rest of my drink and pour another. “You weren’t there that night. You wouldn’t understand.”
“Let me ask you something.” She picks up her wine and swirls it in the glass. “Is she important to you?”
“Yes. More than anything.” There’s no hesitation left where Callie’s concerned. I already know I want her—no, need her—in my life.
“So, what are you doing in my living room other than getting drunk and eating tacos when you could be with the only woman you’ve ever truly cared about?”
“I can count at least three other women I care about.”
“Are you purposefully being dense? That’s not what I meant, and you know it.”
I lean forward and clasp my hands together. “She walked away.”
“You didn't exactly give her much of a choice,” she says earnestly. “She was trying to connect with you, Jax. You shut her down. Do you know how it feels to be discarded like that? You need to look at it from her perspective.”
Shit. When she says it like that, it makes perfect sense why Callie would want to distance herself.
She’s been on her own for so long. The first time she tried to open up, I pushed her away.
I really am the asshole. I should never have dragged her into my life if I wasn’t going to let her all the way in.
That’s my mistake to reckon with—my sin to atone for.
I’ll find a way to make it up to her. I’ll get down on my knees and beg if I have to.
Somehow, someway, I’ll show her I’m worthy of a place in her life.
Ruby plants her elbow on the back of the couch and rests her cheek against her hand. “Talk to her. Cut yourself open, lay yourself bare. Whatever you have to do to make things right. Just… let her see you, Jax. If you aren’t willing to do that, you don’t deserve her.”
“You’re damn right about that part.”
“I usually am. Just ask Liam.”
I glance toward the floor-to-ceiling windows and stare out at the panoramic view of Nashville. Ruby only stays here when she’s touring or recording. She spends most of her time at home in Oak Ridge with her fiancé, Liam, and his son, Aiden. “How is the broody bastard anyway?”
“You mean my husband?”
I gape at her. “You didn’t.”
She holds up her ring finger to show me the diamond band that now sits beneath her extravagant ruby engagement ring. “I did.”
“Mama’s gonna kill you.”
She backhands my shoulder. “You’re not going to tell her. Besides, she’ll be too busy planning your wedding to care about mine.”
“Would you really deprive Pops of walking you down the aisle?”
Ruby slumps back against the sofa, wine glass in hand. “No. We’ll have a small ceremony eventually, it’s just that we waited so long to get together, I couldn’t wait any longer to be his wife.”
Makes sense. Ruby and Liam danced around their feelings for ten years before they finally got their happy ending. I’m patient, but ten more years of wanting Callie and not having her would drive me to the brink of madness.
“So, are you Ruby Lynn Murphy now?”
“Nope.” She smirks. “They’re legally mine. Liam and Aiden Hayes.”
I press my thumb against the opposite palm, massaging a pressure point. “I’m happy for you.”
She gazes at me sympathetically, and in that moment, she looks so much like our mom. “You need to find happiness for yourself, too.”
“I’m getting there.”
“Good. Eat your tacos. The guest bedroom is all set up so you can sleep it off and drive home with a clear head.”
I pop a chip into my mouth and swallow. “Wanna come back with me?”
The long drive home alone sounds like hell. The last thing I need is more time alone to stew with my thoughts.
“I was planning to stay in Nashville for a few more days, but I could always leave early. Liv wants to go wedding dress shopping next week.”
I wrap my arm around her shoulder and pull her in for a side hug. “I’ll let you have full control of the radio.”
“Deal.”