Chapter 18
My fingers dig into the seat at my sides as I watch Ringo through the windscreen, talking to the border cops. The headlights of the Landy are shining on them like they are on stage under a spotlight.
There’s a lot of hand gestures from Ringo and one of the cops, like they are arguing, before the other cop takes out his phone and makes a call.
“W-what’s happening?” Daniel croaks from the back of the car, and I jerk at the sound of his voice, having forgotten he was even there.
“Don’t talk to me,” I snap, feeling way too emotional right now, because fuck him, I hate that I felt bad for him.
Bloody bad.
Bad because he was being raped. Because someone was showing him exactly what it’s like to be brutally used like that.
I should be revelling in his misery, but instead, I feel bad.
And queasy.
Just thinking about it makes me want to puke.
“I-I’m s-sorry, A-Abbey.” He coughs. “F-for what I d-did.”
I clench my teeth so tightly that I fear they are about to crumble any second, because fuck him. Fuck him for only feeling bad after it’s happened to him.
He should have felt bad back when it was happening. Or, better yet, not even considered doing it.
But he did.
And he did it so easily.
But Ringo is right. We can’t change the past. It’s happened, and we need to focus on what’s coming.
“Your apology is too late. I don’t need it anymore. I just need this to be over.”
My voice is lifeless as I speak, the part of me tied to the trauma he caused already shutting down.
She’s done. She’s checking out. She’s ready to move on.
It’s a little hard though when the instigator of your gang rape is bleeding from his butt in the back of the car.
Shit… why did Smitty do that?
My lids fall closed as I fight for control over the tears that want to fall again.
So much pain. So much loss. So much blood.
When is enough, enough?
All of this is because of me. Because of the cult life my mum locked us in.
Ringo is at odds with Smitty. I don’t even know if what happened means he’s no longer a Southern Sadist, but since he’s still wearing his cut, the eerie skull on the back looking at me lit by the headlights of the car, I’m going to assume he is.
It’s then that Ringo spins and storms back towards the Landy, a savage glare consuming his expression.
He can be an intimidating man when he wants to be. Well, he’s like that most of the time, but he softens for me… mostly.
A gush of cold air sweeps in when he gets back into the driver’s seat, his eyes darting into the back to check on Daniel before coming to me.
“I don’t know what the Angel sisters had to do to make this happen, but we finally have the all clear to pass.”
I nod, tugging on my seatbelt again. “Do you need me to drive?” I ask, and his surprised expression meets mine.
“Angel, no offense, but did you see how the van fared after you stole it from the airfield?”
My lips twitch. “That wasn’t because of my lack of driving skills. That was because I was out of my mind after Daniel told me Bobbi didn’t die.”
“Even so,” he smirks back, “I’m not prepared to risk my Landy.”
I snicker at that, relaxing a little at the brief lightness to our conversation, and Ringo drives the car forward slowly, passing through the pandemic state border security checkpoint.
The van and motorcycles follow behind, and the moment we are safely on South Australian soil, we speed up and drive off into the night.
We don’t talk much, Ringo playing Metallica through the radio as the late night turns into the very early morning of Wednesday, just eight weeks since Bobbi was born.
At some point I fall asleep, even though I didn’t think I’d be able to with Ringo’s music on, but something about it started to soothe the race of my heart, and I ended up thinking about Lexi, and how much she’d like this music.
I miss her.
I miss the times we used to share when we were oblivious to the depraved things our parents were involved in.
I miss that lighthearted feeling of wonder about our futures, and what adventures awaited us.
I miss our days in the sun, going to parties with our friends, and movie days at Simon’s, which usually ended up with someone in the pool, even in the dead of winter.
I miss the time when I was just a girl, flirting with guys and wondering what it would be like to kiss them, the idea of sex so far from my thoughts.
Now, everything has changed, and it’s hard for me to wish away the bad things that happened, because if they hadn’t, I may never have met Ringo.
The next time I wake, the car is still running, but it’s pulled over on the side of the road, and I peer out the window to see Ringo standing in the dark on a scrubby sidewalk, talking with JD and the others.
Stretching, I glance back at Daniel, and as far as I can see he’s sleeping, so I slip my shoes on, and quietly get out of the car.
Ringo turns at the sound of the car door clicking closed, reaching his hand out in my direction.
Moving to their little pack, I take his hand and let him pull me against his side, loving how he presses his lips to my head as he listens to JD talk.
“Brody got a couple of calls from some of the guys,” he explains, and I can just make out the worry etched over his features from the glow of the car headlights. “They are all panicking. Don’t know what’s happening and who they should be following.”
“I’m not vying for the President’s cut. I was just doing what’s fucking right,” Ringo grumbles, and JD nods. “That’s what I told Brody.”
“What did Jols say?” Ringo asks, and JD’s face turns to stone.
“Don’t worry about that.”
“Dude, as if we’re not going to worry about that.” Vender bumps his shoulder against JD’s. “Has she heard anything?”
I glance around the group of men, who all remain silent, their focus on JD, and feel a sense of something… is it? Belonging?
“Smitty called her.” JD’s jaw ticks, and I feel Ringo stiffen. “Said her boy toy is a traitorous sack of shit and won’t be returning to the club.”
“Fuck that prick!” Murf snarls. “He’s off his fucking rocker. And what’s with Spud and Tups doing shit like that? I thought that stuff was stamped out ten fucking years ago.”
“It was,” Ringo snaps. “Smitty’s always been a fucking wildcard, but this… this is not the President we voted in.”
“Right, well, let’s get that piece of shit sorted,” Mex bobs his head towards the Landy, “get our little Bobbi girl back to her mumma,” he winks at me, “and then worry about the fucking club business after that.”
Our little Bobbi girl?
My chest warms. They haven’t even met her yet, and they are calling her theirs? Like she’s already a part of the family.
I squeeze closer to Ringo as one of the thousands of lacerations in my heart stitches itself closed.
Is this what a real family is like? Caring about someone just because they mean a lot to someone else? Fighting for them, even if it goes against others’ wishes?
Shit. Maybe I can do this. Be a mum, I mean.
With guys like this around, especially Ringo, I feel like I’d have the courage to face anything.
Pulling his phone out, Ringo checks the time. “We have a couple of hours before the sun rises. Let’s scope the place out and aim to go in before daylight hits.”
My brows hitch as his words sink in, and I glance around, past the guys, at the scrubby bushland surrounding us.
“Uhhh, are we there? Is Bobbi here somewhere?”
“That way, Angel.” Ringo points down the road. “It’s a small seaside town. Nothing fancy. Dirt roads and little beach cabins. We’ll pile into the van once the guys check out the house. Leave the hogs and Landy here hidden in the bushes.”
My heart starts racing, part of me wanting to start running down the road to find my baby. But shit. I don’t know how many houses there are or where she is exactly, so I nod eagerly, listening to them make a game plan.
When JD, Vender, Mex and Stocky leave on foot to scope out the house, I pace beside the car, chewing on my nail as my emotions start to climb.
I’m impatient and anxious, and I can feel Ringo’s eyes on me, but he doesn’t tell me to calm down. He knows how massive this is. How today is going to change my life forever.
Not just mine, I suppose. His too. At least, for as long as he wants to keep me around.
Twenty minutes later, the guys return, a little breathless from jogging, and JD bends, placing his hands on his knees as he starts relaying what they saw.
“House is the second one in on the waterfront. There is dirt road access, plus beach access. A house on either side. One looks to be occupied, and the other looks vacant. A holiday rental, maybe.” JD coughs, clearing his throat as he straightens.
“We, uhhh, heard a baby crying in the target house. Must have woken as we approached. A light came on inside, the back corner, roadside.”
My heart flips, and I suck my lips in, trying to fight back tears.
“Any visual inside?” Ringo asks, pulling me against his chest and running his hand up and down my back.
“Yeah, only from the beach side. I could see a woman walking around,” Vender adds.
“Just one woman?” Ringo asks, and Vender nods. “Either the second woman is in bed, or isn’t there. Either way, we go in assuming there are two adults in the house. Maybe more.”
The men go over a few more details, but I zone out, only picking up words like, the baby must be protected at all costs, and try not to kill the women, but if they threaten the baby, take them out.
After they have a plan of attack, the motorcycles are hidden in the bushes, and Daniel is escorted from the Landy into the back of the van, his body curled over like he’s in pain as he walks.
Ringo ushers me to the front of the van, getting me to slide into the narrow middle seat as he gets in next to me, and JD slips into the driver’s seat, starting up the van.
The others are in the back with Daniel, while Stocky stays behind with the Landy and bikes, acting as a lookout on the one road in.
My knee won’t stop jigging again, my heart thundering in my chest, and I want to chew on my nails, but Ringo has hold of both of my hands like he knows exactly what I want to do.
JD drives the van down the road, and when we round the bend, a dingy little streetlight illuminates a row of tiny houses on the right, and one single street, which is a dirt road.
At the end of the road we are on, there is a sign warning that there’s no vehicle access to the beach, and as the car slows, a couple of the guys jump out the side door and run, guns in hand, towards the sandy path between the dunes.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
This is really happening.
“When we pull up, you stay in this car until I tell you,” Ringo demands. “Got it?”
I nod, even though I don’t spare him a glance, my eyes focused ahead as JD slowly idles the van onto the dirt road, stopping in front of the first house.
“Let’s go,” JD barks, and again, some of the guys slip out the side door, while JD cuts off the engine and gets out too, following behind.
It’s eerily quiet inside the van. I can hear Ringo breathing next to me, and glance over my shoulder into the back to see Murf sitting with Daniel, who has been bound and gagged.
Squinting back through the windscreen, I see the dark silhouettes of the Sadists disappear into the front yard of the second house in, and Ringo releases my hands to take his gun out.
“You doing okay?” he whispers, and I glance at him, trying not to cry.
I bob my head, but then shake it, and end up shrugging, because clearly, I’m not doing so well.
His warm hand reaches up, cupping the side of my face as he presses his forehead to mine in that way he loves to do, and his spicy scent, the one that has me feeling like home, envelops me.
“I’m scared,” I whisper.
“I know.”
“I don’t know how to be a mum.”
“I don’t know how to be a dad,” he rasps. “But we’ll figure it out. Together.”
A fat tear bursts from my eye, and his thumb catches it, like he knew it was coming.
“You really want to do this with me?”
“Fuck, yes. Not even an ounce of doubt, Abs.”
Shit, I love it when he calls me Abs.
“I love you,” I whisper past my trembling lips.
“I fucking love you too.” He growls in that raspy way of his, and leans closer, pressing his lips to mine.
I sob into his mouth, hating that, yes, once again, I’m crying, but right now, these are happy tears. Any maybe a few scared tears too, but mostly, happy.
The vibration of Ringo’s phone breaks us apart a moment later, and his bright screen lights up our faces as he opens the text from JD.
Get in here. Now!