Beauty and the Bachelor

Chapter 24

Our ballet lesson is both the parade of humiliation and the special treat I expected it to be. Vivian’s grace puts mine to shame. I was not made to dance, but Vivian is mesmerizing to watch. Her beauty and elegance as she prances and leaps around the room captivates me. More than once, I miss my dance moves because I’ve stopped to watch her.

We learn a dance from some ballet that Vivian loves, and when we’re done, we’re dressed up in costume—her in a tutu and me in leggings—and marched to a stage where we perform for the entire school. I’m going to be the laughingstock of the nation when this footage airs, but watching Vivian in her element is worth it. She shines. She radiates joy and confidence.

After the lesson, when we’re back in the limo and leaving the school, I’m exhausted, but Vivian is bouncing in her seat, alive with excitement. She’s got her head in the clouds. I, on the other hand, have already forgotten our dance lesson. The only thing I can focus on is the kiss we shared before we entered the school. What did it mean? Did it mean anything at all, or was she just overwhelmed and acting in the spur of the moment? Would she let me do it again?

We’re taken to separate hotels to eat a quick dinner and get ready for our evening out because, heaven forbid, we spend any time together when we’re not on camera. Vivian is dropped off first. I want to kiss her good-bye, but she leans in for a hug. I keep a smile on my face when she pulls away and jumps out of the car, but once the door is closed, I sit back with a sigh. One step forward, two steps back. Time is running out. Will I be able to win her over and convince her that we belong together?

“Not the good-bye you were hoping for?” James asks curiously, with an innocence that I don’t buy for a second.

I give him a flat look. I hate these stupid confessional moments, but the show is determined to always intrude on my private thoughts.

“Come on, give me something. What did you think of the day?”

I tip my head back and stare at the ceiling while I try to contain my annoyance. “It was a good day,” I finally admit. “I’m not going to quit my day job to become a ballet dancer, but Vivian had fun, and that’s what matters.”

“What about that kiss?”

I cock a brow and stubbornly say, “What about it?”

“How was it?” he asks shamelessly.

“Are you seriously asking me if I liked it?”

In truth, it was the best kiss I’ve ever had, and it left me desperately wanting more, but I’m not saying that to him. “I don’t kiss and tell.”

“What about your relationship? You think she’s finally coming around?”

“I hope so.”

“Do you think she’s falling for you?”

I huff in exasperation. “How am I supposed to know that?”

James doesn’t relent. “Are you falling for her?”

I grind my teeth and turn my gaze out the window. I don’t want to admit the truth because the fact is, I’ve already fallen for her, and if she breaks my heart, I don’t want the whole nation to know it.

James leaves me alone after that, and I get some blessed peace while I eat my dinner and shower. There was a tuxedo laid out on my bed when I came into the room, so I put that on. I’m no stranger to formal wear, but I don’t think I’ll ever get used to having someone else do my hair and makeup. The two women the show hired work quickly and then they leave to go help Vivian. I’m left alone to wait. I fall asleep. The weeks of travel are catching up with me. But I’m thankful for the quick nap because I feel a little more alert afterward, and I would hate to accidentally fall asleep at the theater tonight.

I’m nervous when we pull up to the place where we’re going to have our fake dinner. I need this night to go well. It’s the last chance I’ll have to see Vivian before we go to her home. I’d like to feel a little more confident in our relationship before I have to meet her family. Today went really well, but she was distracted by the activities. Tonight, over dinner, I hope to get a clue as to her feelings. This is my one shot to win her over. I feel like tonight could make or break us.

I get there first and can’t help but be impressed at the setup. They’ve placed a candlelit table for two on the rooftop of a building with the Eiffel Tower in the background. It’s very romantic, and thankfully, very private.

I spring to my feet when Vivian arrives. It feels like I’ve been punched in the stomach. The breath leaves my lungs in a whoosh, and all thought flies from my brain. I’ve never seen anyone more stunning. I saw the dress this morning when she tried it on, but tonight, with the hair and makeup I get the full effect and the result is breathtaking. Her navy blue dress shimmers, her eyes look all smoky and mysterious, and her hair is piled up on her head in an elaborate style.

I smile at the small, sparkling tiara she’s wearing. It’s perfect for a ballerina. I’d asked Marguerite to find some jewelry that would work with the dress. She’s wearing dangly earrings that shine as much as the tiara. I wonder if she realizes they’re real diamonds, and that they, along with the tiara and the dress, are a gift instead of something borrowed for the evening. James and Andrea suggested I give them to her on camera, but I know better. There’s no way Vivian will accept such a gift from me. She’ll find out soon enough, and if I’m not there for her to give them back, she’ll have no choice but to accept them.

She slows down when she sees the look on my face, and a pretty blush spreads across her cheeks. “Vivian…you look…” I’m speechless, and I can’t take my eyes off her.

I shake my head as if to kick it into gear. I hold out my hands and she timidly places hers into them. I take the shyness as a good sign. She’s never acted the least bit shy before. Is she as nervous right now as me? “You’re beautiful,” I murmur.

I debate whether I should lean in for a hug or a kiss on the cheek, but after a moment I decide to go for it and surprise her with a simple kiss on the lips. That’s what I’d do if this were a real relationship, and I need to get her thinking that’s what this is.

The kiss startles her, but she doesn’t object to it. Her cheeks turn a deeper scarlet, and she looks down at the table. I don’t think she’s ever been more flustered around me. I can see the effort it takes her to look at me again, and she has to clear her throat before she can speak. “You clean up nicely too.”

I shouldn’t tease her while she’s obviously feeling vulnerable, but I want to break the ice, so I smirk and say, “How much did that compliment kill you to say?”

Her eyes flick to mine in surprise, and a small bark of laughter escapes her. Her confidence comes back, and she rolls her eyes. “I nearly choked on it, but I’ll be okay.”

Glad to have the easy mood back, I pull out her chair and help her sit before taking a seat beside her. Once again, we’re instructed to wait on any conversation while the cameras and lights are properly set up. The camera crew takes a lot of the romance out of the evening, but both Vivian and I have gotten a little better at ignoring them as the weeks have passed.

Vivian looks down at the Coq au Vin in front of her forlornly. “Did you not get dinner?” I ask.

She sighs. “I got a burger and fries. Again. I say, if they’re going to make an authentic five-star dinner anyway, they should make enough to feed us too. We’re in France. How can we not try the local cuisine?”

I wholeheartedly agree. “You’re going to love my chef. He’ll make you anything you want. He’s a Michelin Star chef.”

She narrows her eyes at me. “You say that like I’ve already agreed to marry you.”

I flash her a grin. “I’m hoping.”

Her mouth falls open and flaps like a fish while she tries to come up with a reply. She never seems to know how to respond to my flirting. I always hope she might flirt back, but she’s a stubborn one.

“You can’t really mean that,” she finally says.

I hadn’t planned to have this conversation yet, but since she brought it up… “Why not?” I ask. “We had a good day today, didn’t we?”

She blinks at me like I’ve lost my mind. “A good day, Sebastian.”

I smile, loving the sound of my name on her lips.

“One day does not mean we’re ready for marriage.” She shakes her head in bewilderment. “It’s this show. It messes with your mind. It lowers your inhibitions until what would normally sound insane seems like a good idea.”

“It’s not the show that’s breaking me down. It’s you.”

I pause, staring intently at her, letting that sink in. She has to recognize that there’s something between us. When she shakes her head and opens her mouth to argue, I cut her off before she can deny it. “I haven’t lowered my guard with any of the other women.”

She frowns. “Yeah. Why is that? Usually the bachelors on this show build relationships with half a dozen of the contestants. Haven’t the producers been pressuring you to get closer to the other women?”

She’s trying to change the subject. It’s not going to work. I shrug. “They’ve given up on that because they realize it’s futile. You’re the one I want. The only one.”

She chugs the glass of champagne in front of her, then blurts out, “You kissed Emma.”

I barely resist a groan. I knew that would bite me in the ass.

“Your date with her must have gone well. She came back a little smitten.”

I can’t tell if Vivian brought it up because she’s jealous or if she’s trying to pawn me off on the other woman. Either way, this is not the direction I wanted this conversation to go.

“Do you like her?” she asks.

The only thing I hear in her question is curiosity. It’s disappointing. Not that I want her to be hurt that I got close to someone else, but a little jealousy would be encouraging. I study her, looking for any sign that she feels something for me. She kissed me today. She can’t be completely indifferent. She sits there, poised and waiting patiently for my answer. I have no idea what she’s thinking.

That groan I’ve been holding back finally escapes. “Do you really want to talk about this? About my dates with the other women? Nothing good can come of it.”

She shrugs and stares me down. “You’re talking about marriage. Your relationships with the other women is a pretty important topic, don’t you think?”

I scrub my hands over my face and shoot her an exasperated look. She’s relentless. “I don’t have any relationships with the other women. I’m obligated to spend time with them.”

“Then why kiss Emma? Out of obligation? Was kissing multiple women in your contract? I wouldn’t put it past this show to demand that.” There’s a hint of anger in her voice that gives me a little hope. Maybe she’s jealous after all. But then she says, “That was her first kiss, you know. It’s a little cruel to take that moment from her if you didn’t mean it.”

She’s angry on her friend’s behalf. I know she and Emma have gotten close, and I hate that I’ve pitted them against each other, but I didn’t have a choice. “I didn’t kiss her out of obligation,” I say, knowing that either way I answer her, I lose the argument.

Sure enough, she says, “Then you wanted to kiss her?”

I rake my hand through my hair and groan at the sky. “Yes,” I say. “All right? I wanted to kiss her. I had to see if there could be anything between us. If you had shown me any kind of encouragement, I wouldn’t have done it, but I don’t have the luxury of waiting for you. This show is almost over, and I have to find a wife. Emma is a sweet woman. She’s pretty and pleasant to be around. I think, given enough time, we could maybe grow to love each other. If I can’t have you, she’s my best option.”

Vivian’s mouth falls open and anger flashes in her eyes. “You would do that to her? Let her marry you knowing she’s only second best?”

I throw my hands in the air. “I hope not! I don’t want to settle, but you don’t understand, I don’t have a choice. It has to be someone. It’s not like I’ve been leading Emma on. She asked about you. I told her the truth. I asked her if that was something she could live with.”

Vivian’s jaw snaps shut, and she blinks. “And she said yes?”

My shoulders slump. “She said she’d think about it. That’s when I asked if I could kiss her. I didn’t pressure her. She wanted to see if we could connect physically just as much as I did.”

Vivian swallows, and for the first time since this hellish conversation started, vulnerability washes over her features. “And did you?” she asks quietly. “Connect?”

I shrug helplessly. “Not the way you and I did today.”

I reach over and take her hand, squeezing it firmly. “I know you feel it. There’s something between us. Something special. I never dreamed when I came on this show that I’d actually find someone I could love.”

She gasps at my use of the L word and tries to tug her hand back, but I hold it tight. I pull her toward me and lean in, claiming her mouth in a desperate kiss. It takes her a few seconds to respond, but then she melts as if she can’t resist me. I let go of her hand in order to cup her face in both of mine. I just need to feel her. Hold her any way I can. I put everything into this kiss because after this train wreck of a fake dinner, it might just be the last kiss I get. My heart is out there for her to keep or break.

I pull away from her, panting for air, but I don’t let go of her cheeks. Keeping her close while she too tries to catch her breath, I plead with her. “Don’t pass this up because you’re scared. I know it’s fast, but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong.”

Her eyes gloss over. It hurts my heart to see her tears. I wish I could give her all the time she needs. “Why?” she asks with a trembling voice. “Why do you have to get married so badly?”

I push her long, sweeping bangs back behind her ear. “I have my reasons, and I will explain them to you. Full disclosure. I promise. After the show is over. Until then, please trust me.”

She swallows again and whispers, “You’re asking a lot.”

“I know,” I say softly. I brush my thumb over her lips. Her eyes flutter shut, and a couple of tears escape her watery lashes. I press my mouth to hers once more in a gentle kiss. “But I have faith in you. Faith in us.”

Silence settles between us, and when it’s clear the moment is over, James informs us that it’s time to go. Vivian still hasn’t spoken. I stand up and hold my hand out to her, praying she’ll accept it but giving her the choice. “Come on. I do believe the ballet awaits.”

Vivian is quiet on the way to the opera house, where the show has secured us a private box to watch the ballet from. The theater is beautiful and opulent, with chandeliers, marble columns, and the grandest staircase I’ve ever seen. The place is full of history and luxury and catches Vivian’s attention enough to take her mind off of our serious conversation. I’m grateful for the distraction. I was worried I’d spoiled the night for her, and I really want her to enjoy the ballet. I know how much it means to her.

As soon as the curtain goes up, I may as well not even be sitting next to her. Vivian’s attention is solely focused on the stage. She takes it all in with rapture, giving me the chance to watch her. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone enjoy something so much. I like that I was able to give this to her. Even if she never agrees to marry me, she will always remember this day and hopefully know how much she means to me.

After the ballet is over, we’re herded into yet another limo. Vivian is quiet, but when I settle in beside her, she sighs wistfully and leans against my side. I take a chance and pull her hand into mine. She lets me hold it without protest. I lace our fingers together and drop our hands to my thigh. “This day has been magical,” she says out of nowhere. She squeezes my hand. “Thank you. You didn’t have to do any of this, but I appreciate it. So much.”

I squeeze her hand back and kiss the side of her head. “I don’t think there’s much I wouldn’t do for you.”

Vivian goes quiet again, but she leans her head on my shoulder. It takes everything in me not to pull her into my arms. I want nothing more than to hold her, but I don’t want to scare her away. I’ve put her through the wringer enough already tonight.

James catches my attention and motions for me to start talking. I scowl but play his dumb game. “The next time we see each other, I’ll be meeting your family,” I say, breaking the silence with what I hope is an easier topic. “Anything I should know? Or be worried about?”

She lifts her head off my shoulder and adjusts to face me a little, but, surprisingly, she doesn’t let go of my hand. She smirks. “Aren’t you supposed to wait until after the next rose ceremony to admit you’re keeping me through the next round? Jeremiah’s going to be mad.”

I roll my eyes. I couldn’t care less what Jeremiah thinks. “It’s not like it’ll be a surprise.”

“True.”

I nudge her shoulder with mine. “Tell me about your family.”

She sighs. “As you know, it’s unconventional.”

“Which I have no problems with,” I assure her quickly, with another squeeze of her fingers. “I’m looking forward to meeting your fathers. They sound like great men.”

“They are. The best.” She glances at me and grimaces. “I’m not sure how they’re going to react to you.”

My brows fly up. “You don’t think they’ll like me?”

Disappointment pangs my chest. Family is important to me. I want to have a good relationship with Vivian’s parents.

“You forget you’re the villain of my story.”

The accusation startles me. When I frown, Vivian winces. “The last time I talked to them, I’d just been coerced into joining the show. I had to give up my job. I was angry, and it was your idea. I blamed you as much as I blamed Jeremiah. I may have ranted a bit, and I haven’t talked to them since. They’ve had a lot of time to stew.”

Great. Vivian’s dads are the two most important people in her life. If I can’t convince them I’m right for their daughter, Vivian will never agree to marry me. Their opinion will matter too much to her.

“Any advice?”

Vivian looks at me for a long moment. I can’t read her. Her gaze bounces all over my face, and then suddenly she reaches up and combs her fingers through my hair. It’s such an affectionate gesture, full of care and warmth. Her face softens into a smile I’ve never seen from her before. It’s genuine and, dare I say, loving? “Just be yourself,” she says.

I’m shocked. Myself? Does that mean she likes me? The villain of her story? Could she really care about me?

“Be the version of you that you were today. The man who wants to go to Japan because he likes Pokémon and who suffered through a ballet lesson in front of cameras just to make a woman’s dream come true.”

She clasps my hand in both of hers. “If you’re sincere with your feelings for me, my dads will see it.”

“I am sincere,” I murmur. My heart begins to pound as a confession fights to break free from my lips. One I know is a bad idea. One that will scare Vivian, but one that I can’t keep secret anymore. I just can’t. “Vivian…” I shift in my seat, facing her fully. I gaze into her eyes, and the words slip out. “I love you.”

Vivian freezes. She tries to hide her shock, but her eyes widen, and she swallows audibly. Insecurity swamps me the longer she stays silent. I’ve broken her brain. “You don’t have to say it back,” I tell her, scrambling for any words that might break her from her daze. “I know you probably don’t feel the same, but I need you to understand that I’m serious about you. This isn’t just because I need a wife. Even if I didn’t, I’d still want you. I’m actually glad I came on this show because I wouldn’t have met you otherwise, and I can’t imagine you not being in my life.”

I take a deep breath and let it out slowly. I’ve said my piece and can now only pray telling her my true feelings wasn’t a mistake. It wasn’t a mistake on my end. Telling her, and admitting it to myself, feels freeing.

Vivian still hasn’t moved. Her face is a mask of shock. I wait. I laid a lot on her, and I know she’s scared. I was terrified at first too. Still am.

The limo comes to a stop in front of Vivian’s hotel. She still hasn’t said a word, but the fear in her eyes has lessened. I wish she’d smile at me again the way she had before I’d changed everything. Vivian looks out the window at the hotel, then looks back at me, plagued with indecision. She needs some time to think about it. I can give her that. But first, one last kiss. I want her to leave me on a good note. I need her to remember how good we are together.

I don’t give her the chance to run from me. I swoop in and take her mouth. She becomes pliant beneath my touch, allowing me to claim her for a moment, but then she starts to kiss me back, and something changes in her. The longer our lips are fused together, the more she responds until she’s the one controlling the kiss. Her hands come up to my cheeks, and she leans in like she’s desperate for me.

Not one to be dominated, I give back as much as she’s putting in. Passion consumes us. Fire sizzles. I need more from her. I reach for her waist, needing to feel her against me, and before I know it, I’m pulling her onto my lap. Our bodies smash together, causing me to shiver and her to gasp. I take advantage and plunge my tongue deep into her mouth. Her hands move from my cheeks and rake through my hair. Her nails lightly scratch my scalp. My eyes roll back in my head. I ache for her.

“Sebastian,” she murmurs on a gasp.

My name in that breathy, lustful voice is the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard. My lips find her neck, her throat, her shoulders. I’ve lost all reason. I can only react to the white-hot desire burning though my body. I’ve never wanted someone so badly in my life.

“We need to stop,” she says, pulling me back from the brink of insanity. “There are cameras.”

The reminder quickly cools me off. We break our connection, but she’s still perched in my lap. Our chests heave, and we’re panting for breath. I push a few loose strands of her hair back behind her ear. “Sorry. You make me crazy.”

I’m surprised by the crooked grin she gives me. I expected her fear to come back now that she’s thinking straight again, but instead she looks happy. It gives me hope. “You weren’t the only one to lose your head,” she says.

“True.” I wrap my arms around her waist and hug her tightly to me. “You should probably go before we do it again.”

She looks as if she’s considering it and weighing the consequences. Finally, she smirks at me. “If you want me to leave, you’ll have to let go of me.”

My grip tightens. “I don’t want you to leave.”

“I don’t think they’ll let me stay.”

She nods toward James and his camera crew. I glare at the camera crew as if it’s all their faults I can’t spend more time with Vivian. I really, really want this stupid show to be over already. Sighing, I let her go and scoot her off my lap. When she opens the car door, I pull her back to me. “One more, for good measure.”

She happily leans in, and we kiss again. We hold it long enough to start getting heated again and have to rip ourselves apart. I can’t believe this is happening. She’s mine. She’s really mine. After all this time wanting her and thinking I’d never have her, I’m allowed to touch her and kiss her. She didn’t say she loves me back, but she didn’t run from me. I press my lips to hers again in one last peck. “Goodnight, Vivian.”

She gives me a soft smile. “Goodnight, Sebastian. Thank you for one of the best days of my life.”

A ridiculous amount of pride fills me at her words. It’s enough to slightly mar my disappointment when she steps out of the limo and the door closes behind her. I sink back into the seat, feeling really good about everything. Not only am I going to save my company, but I’ll have an amazing woman by my side.