Bed of Roses

CHAPTER EIGHT NO, I AIN’T

CHAPTER EIGHT

NO, I AIN’T

N oah’s first thought upon waking up the next morning was Sam. He got to the store in record time even though he let his truck crawl at a snail’s pace when he was passing by Kathleen’s. Though he was determined to be patient and wait a few days, he couldn’t stop himself from picking up the phone more than a dozen times in the next two days. But he never took it past the dial tone.

The way that gossip spread through Homestead, she had to have heard about Laura breaking up with him because the town seemed to be choking on the news. Some acted as if there had been a death in the community instead of an ordinary breakup. Folks that Noah grew up with bowed their heads in public and talked quietly when they saw him. The day after Laura started telling folks that she and Noah had broken up, a gaggle of older ladies started bringing casseroles and cakes, quickly turning the bookshop into a funeral wake with their hushed murmurs and nine-by-thirteen casseroles all in a row on his desk.

“I just gotta be patient,” he said to the black landline receiver hanging closest to the brownies. “She deserves time to process, and when Kathleen sends her down for another round of books, I’ll be ready.”

He was resolute for most of the two days. By morning three though, Noah was biting at the bit. He picked up the phone to call Kathleen and let her know he’d be open until seven again. His hand was holding the phone receiver when the bell above the door chimed and startled him. He swung around to find Rita Jo with an armful of doughnuts, and his hopes instantly deflated. He had thought and wished just for a moment that Sam had finally shown up.

“Hey, darlin’,” Rita Jo said as she crossed the floor in a sexy strut. “I brought you something to ease your pain. Sweets always help me when I’m down and blue. I thought a taste of doughnuts could help distract you from your heartache.” She rounded the end of the desk, sat down in his lap without ceremony, and hugged him tightly until he awkwardly hugged her back.

“Thank you for your sympathy and the doughnuts, but Laura and I broke up on friendly terms. What we had was over a long time ago, and we both admitted it. We’re fine with moving on as friends. I don’t want to drop you on the floor, but I really need to stand up and shelve some books.”

“Well, then.” Rita Jo stood up and took both his hands in hers. “You’re convincing, but I don’t buy it. You’re the kinda man that will hide his pain inside, but honey, I’m here for you for whatever you need.” She gave him a sly wink and batted her lashes. “And I do mean whatever. How about we go for a drink when you get off work this evening?”

“Thank you.” Noah smiled and said, “but I have plans already.”

Rita Jo straightened up and eyed him carefully. “With the redhead? She’s the real reason that you and Laura broke up, isn’t she? Everyone in Homestead knows that y’all have been carrying on.”

Noah sucked in a lungful of air and let it out slowly. “You shouldn’t believe everything you hear, Rita Jo.”

Rita Jo picked up the box of doughnuts again and swung back to look at Noah, her mouth in a tight line now instead of a sweet smile. “If you aren’t grieving and needing someone to lean on, I’ll take these back. Seems you’re getting enough sympathy elsewhere.” She marched out of the bookstore without even looking back, leaving Noah wondering where the hell that had come from.

It was only a few hours after Rita had left when Noah finally caved and picked up the landline. He punched in the phone number to the B&B and was preparing to leave a message when Kathleen’s voice cut off the fifth ring. “Hello, Noah. How are you doing, my boy?”

“I’m doing just fine. I hope you’re doing good too. I—uh—I’m sure the gossip train has already gotten up the hill by now. Don’t know what you’ve heard, but I wanted to assure you that all is well. Laura is happy, and I’m happy for her. All’s well that ends well.” He heard himself using that line too much. He stopped and cleared his throat when Kathleen didn’t respond. “I just wanted to see how y’all were doing and let you know that I’m going back to my later hours at the shop now.”

“Well, that’s good to hear. Just know we all love ya and we’ll be praying for you through all this. And Laura too, I hope she found happiness as you said. Her mama deserves to know her baby is going to be okay.” Kathleen’s tone was a tad diplomatic and reserved in comparison to how she normally spoke.

“I agree with that. I have talked to Justine, and she is taking it pretty well. And I’m fine. Really, Kathleen, I mean it. I am not in pain. My heart is not broken,” he declared.

“If you are being honest with me and yourself, then I’m glad for you. You deserve to find your own happiness too, honey.” She spoke to someone in the background before returning. “The little lady I hired to clean the rooms just got here. I should go.”

“Sure, Kathleen, but would you give Sam my cell phone number and tell her to call me? Please? I haven’t seen her in a long while now,” Noah said. “I would love to talk to her, just to hear her voice.”

She hesitated for a few seconds before she said, “Noah, she hasn’t been feeling too good and been mighty busy with other things. She may need a little time.”

“Yeah, totally.” Noah stammered a bit. “Anything I can do to help?”

“Prayers and patience do wonders, so just pray and be patient, okay?” Her tone sounded cheery even as she lowered to a whisper. “Healing is a slow process.”

“I can do that. Tell her I called, please, and if any of you need a fresh round of books, just let me know. I can run them by any evening on my way home.”

“Will do,” Kathleen said. “Bye now.”

That was completely unlike the Kathleen he had known all of his life. He normally couldn’t get a word in edgewise when he called her. He wondered what Sam was sick with—or sick from. If Kathleen said to give her time, he would do that. But what exactly would she need time to heal from? Other than her heartbreak in her hometown. Noah scoured his mind for any other clues Sam could have dropped in conversation.

The day dragged on like a slug making its way through molasses. He thought about going by Maggie’s Café for a takeout, or else picking up some lunch meat and bread at the grocery store and staying in the speakeasy that night. But after Sam didn’t show up at the bookstore for another day, he decided to go home. Everywhere he turned, memories of her flashed through his mind. He had kept his phone ringer on loud and clipped it to his belt just in case she called, but it hadn’t happened.

When he got home to the trailer, he made himself two pieces of toast and an omelet with the last three eggs left in his fridge, but he could only eat half of it and tossed the rest in the trash. He tried to think up an excuse to call Kathleen again, but not a blessed thing came to mind. If Sam needed time, then he should give it to her.

If she needs time to heal, maybe I do too , he thought as he sat beside the collection of his things Laura had left on his couch. He stared at the box for several minutes and with a long sigh began to rummage through it—hopefully to settle the past once and for all.

The toothbrush he had kept at Laura’s went directly into the trash along with half a bottle of Stetson. He remembered the first morning they spent together in an expensive hotel in Dallas. She had watched him shave and then frowned when he opened that same bottle.

“You could wear something that doesn’t smell like an eighty-year-old cowboy, you know.”

After that he thought about buying a different kind, but he couldn’t make himself do it. The scent was what his grandfather wore, and he had given him a bottle when he first taught him the proper way to shave. He could still feel his grandpa’s hands guiding him that morning, and the memory put a smile on his face.

The next thing he picked up was a long, narrow velvet box with a sapphire and diamond necklace inside. He had given that to her for Christmas the first year they were together. The blue stones reminded him of her eyes. Not once had he seen her wear it or the matching ring that he had given her for Valentine’s Day. She had worn the earrings only one time when they went out to dinner and a play in Dallas. Noah was a tad shocked Laura had given back all the jewelry that he had given during their relationship. He’d thought she’d keep them, maybe pawn them.

“What do I do with this stuff?” he muttered when he had lined up more velvet-covered boxes on the bed. A brooch that she had marked in one of her many magazines and a diamond tennis bracelet she wanted for the courthouse Christmas party last year, along with several thousand dollars’ worth of more jewelry.

He shoved all of them into the drawer of the nightstand. “I’ll have a silent auction and donate all the money to the school or sell them and send the money as a wedding gift if Surfer Man pops the question.”

The rest of the stuff went right back into the box and was promptly carried out to the trash dumpster. The purging of his past made him wonder if the time would ever come when Sam would leave things at his place? Or would she too be ashamed that he lived in something so humble? Laura couldn’t stand that he had moved into a trailer when he moved out of the Carter home, but would Sam mind? He might be able to ask her if Kathleen would ever let him talk to her again. Noah’s brain ran a million miles a minute. When would he be able to explain everything to Sam?

Noah slept fitfully that night, tossing and turning, stuck in the loop of the same nightmare that kept recurring over and over again. In the dream, he made his way to the Rose Garden, planning to sit on the porch until Sam came out to talk to him, or else he would die of starvation waiting on her. He had armed himself with a bag of books in one hand and a sword in the other. If Jack was anywhere around, he intended to use the sword to protect Sam.

As the house came into view, he realized Jack would be the least of his problems. The rose bushes had grown thorns the size of steak knives and covered the cobblestone walkway with dense brambles, creating a wall of needle points between him and the house. The vines seemed to have minds of their own as they twisted around the front door and the windows on the lower floor. There was no way Sam could get outside and no way for him to get to her either. Tossing the bag of books to the ground, Noah pulled back his sword and began hacking away at the bushes until a noise above him caught his attention and he looked up. Sam stood unmoving in the tiny attic window of Rose Garden, tears streaming down her pained face.

Just as he had started making progress, the bushes would twist and move and quickly fill back in the wounded areas in its defense. Noah’s arms got heavier and heavier, every swing of the sword now taking more from him as the blade dulled to the sharpness of a butter knife. He sucked in a breath and leaned against the hilt of the weapon as he looked up. But Sam wasn’t there in the attic window anymore. Instead, there stood Jack, a creepily wide grin on his face, staring down at Noah as he panted.

“Gotcha!” Jack said with one of his leering grins.

Noah launched up in a cold sweat, ending the nightmare with a bang. His heart thumped so hard in his chest that he couldn’t breathe for a moment. After inhaling several times, he slung his legs over the side of the bed, and with a mouth that felt as if it had been swabbed out with cotton balls, he made his way to the kitchen for a glass of water.

Something hung over him like an ominous omen in his nightmare . I need to see her, just to make sure she’s okay.

Thank God the next day was when the committee planned to stuff the Easter eggs.

Noah compiled some books for all three women, taking extra care with what he picked out for Sam, and headed for the Rose Garden—just a tad bit early. He may only get to see her through a room of other folks, but at least he could lay eyes on her. That’s all he wanted at that point. Her absence was a daily ache he couldn’t stomach much longer.

Noah thought it strange that there were no vehicles parked anywhere when he pulled up, but maybe he was the first one to arrive, so his plan to leave early had worked. He got out of his truck, picked up the bag, and was halfway to the porch when Kathleen opened the door and stepped out.

“Oh, I should have called you today, but we got busy. The Key Club at the school all met at the chamber of commerce office and stuffed the eggs yesterday. They needed to do something for the community, so I gave them that job.”

“I always looked forward to helping with that,” Noah said, not knowing what else to say.

“So did I,” Kathleen said. “We had such a good time, but the kids needed something for the community outreach sector of the club, and it helps connect them with their town by acts of service. Maybe next year.”

“Is Sam around?” Noah asked cautiously.

“She’s still not feeling her best,” Kathleen answered flatly.

“Do we need to take her to the hospital?”

“No, Noah, nothing like that.”

“Well what’s wrong, then, Kathleen? Why won’t she see me?”

“Noah, it ain’t my story to tell. Just be patient. I’ll tell her that you called, and I’ll bring her the books for you. But she needs to figure her own stuff out right now, just like you do.”

Noah nodded stiffly and handed the bag to Kathleen. “I put in a few cowboy books, just in case she feels like reading something different. Tell her that I miss her and I’ve read some of the books she likes. And tell her that I get why she reads them. I see the silver lining too now that I’ve read a few of the ones that she brought back.”

Kathleen nodded. “I’ll let her know, but at my discretion. Thank you for bringing these up. Will we see you tomorrow morning at the sunrise service?”

“Of course.”

“I’ll see you then, thank you again.” Kathleen waved and went back inside, a surge of sadness hitting Noah as the wooden door clicked shut in front of him.

Noah walked back out to the middle of the cobblestone walkway and squinted at the attic window. Sam wasn’t there, but he saw a curtain flutter on the second floor. Then in his peripheral vision he caught movement coming from near his truck and swung around, expecting to see Sam, but it was Jack.

“What are you doing here, Jack?” Noah’s voice was low.

“I reckon I could ask you the same, couldn’t I?” Jack leaned against the metal side of Noah’s Ford truck and smiled up at Noah as he picked at his dirty nails with a pocketknife.

“I was checking in on Sam. Kathleen said she’s been sick.”

“Sick? That’s what the old coot told you?” Jack snarled and kept cleaning his nails.

Noah didn’t answer but just straightened his shoulders and waited.

“While you’ve been getting cucked by Laura, I’ve been making sure Sam wasn’t too lonely out here. She’s a mighty good girl, Noah, and she deserves to be taken real good care of.” The way Jack accentuated certain words in that last sentence made Noah want to wipe the dirty smirk off the man’s face with his fist.

“What does Kara think about you going after Sam?”

“What do I care?” Jack shrugged and continued cleaning his nails while talking. “It seems your run of luck is over, buddy, and mine’s just beginning. Laura finally realized how low she had fallen by dating you. Sam is giving me a chance, and now you’re all alone. Poor pitiful Noah—always the victim.”

“I’d rather be seen as a victim than a predator,” Noah snapped back.

Jack’s knife stopped moving, and he glared at Noah. “What did you call me?”

“I heard what you did to Laura, about all the bruises on her after she broke it off more than once. I ain’t letting you get close to Sam.”

Jack laughed at this and stood taller. “You’re a little too late.”

Noah’s gut twisted, and he took a step closer to Jack.

Jack raised the knife, and pure evil shot from his eyes.

“Are you threatening me right now?” Noah was surprised when Jack leveled the knife at him. Sure, Jack had kicked and punched Noah when they were kids, but he’d never pulled a weapon out on the playground.

“Of course not.” Jack grinned and angled the blade back and forth a bit so it glinted in the sunlight between them as he came closer and closer, right up until the tip of the knife brushed the front of Noah’s shirt. “I’m just getting my point across, Carter. You’re too late and a woman short. You need to keep to yourself and away from here. Sam doesn’t need any of your damn books or your company, so you can scurry on to your shop and lick your wounds there.”

“I’m not going to let you hurt her.” Noah’s face was hard steel, anger having etched his facial features into stern lines.

“Yeah? And how the hell are you gonna stop me?” Jack pushed the knife a bit closer.

Noah could feel the sharpness of the blade through the cotton of his shirt. Jack wouldn’t be crazy enough to stab him, would he? Noah didn’t honestly know the answer to that question, but he couldn’t back down now. Not if Jack really was getting closer to Sam and could hurt her.

Just then, a car came bustling up the drive and swung out to park in the lot at the B&B. Jack took an abrupt step back before snapping the switchblade back in and slipping it in his pocket.

The family of three parked and started unloading from their minivan.

“Kathleen told you that you weren’t allowed here years ago.” Noah lowered his voice so the family couldn’t hear.

“Times change,” Jack whispered back snidely, shrugged, and then spoke up. “Now, I’m gonna help this lovely couple in with their bags, and you should get on back to your books.”

Jack waved at Noah in fake niceness and turned to the grateful family to help them walk their baggage to the door.

Noah didn’t see Kathleen’s response to Jack standing on the threshold with the family’s luggage in tow. He didn’t want to know. Maybe they had made nice, and Kathleen finally approved of Jack even after everything he’d done in the past, but that thought formed new knots in Noah’s stomach.

Noah pulled out of the B&B’s parking area and headed back into town. If he went home, he would just pace around the trailer until sunrise. He headed to the bookshop, but after a few hours, hunger gnawed at him and no work was getting done so he called Maggie’s.

“Justine, are y’all busy right now?” he asked, glad that she had answered the phone. “I’m starving, but I don’t want to be interrogated today.”

“Howdy there, neighbor, the coast is relatively clear. There’s one table of old biddies from the Presbyterian Church, but other than that, we’re dead here.”

Noah drove to the café and parked in the rear and kept his head down as he headed to the back booth. Justine had already set a cup of coffee out for him, and Noah was touched by the gesture. Justine was one of the most thoughtful humans Noah could remember from his childhood. He clung to her as a child in nursery on Sunday mornings when his parents were in the chapel for a sermon. She had even become a sort of surrogate mother after losing his own and especially since Laura had come into his life.

Justine appeared with a glass of water and a menu. “Do you know what you wanna eat?”

“The catfish dinner with hush puppies and collards, and if there’s any pecan pie left, I’d like a slice of that too,” he answered.

Justine nodded and hurried away to put the order in. Noah leaned back and closed his eyes. Folks tend to think that they are in a soundproof cage when they sit down in a booth. He supposed that Ramona Edgewood, Annie Lawrence, and Jane Weathersby hadn’t seen him walk in because he found himself unable to not hear what was going on in their gossip circle two booths down. Ramona was deaf in one ear and slowly losing hearing in her other, so Annie and Jane had to practically shout to keep the vein of conversation open.

“You hear about Justine’s girl?”

“Lord yes. I’d be just up in arms about it if I were Justine. She is holding it together, poor dear.”

“I heard the man Laura stepped off with looks like Fabio,” Annie crowed. “Some big hunk of a man. I heard he surfs.”

“Could we find him on Facebook, you think?” Ramona asked.

The three women broke into a chorus of giggles at the question.

“And just about the time Laura Henton gets out of Dodge, I’ve got wind that Jack Reynolds has set his eye on a girl at the Rose Garden. He’s after that woman Kathleen and Loretta took in,” Jane added.

“I thought he liked ’em fast. I heard that girl is a bookworm. I doubt Kathleen lets him in the door anymore,” Annie said.

“Maybe he’s ready to settle down,” Ramona answered.

“Boys like Jack don’t settle down for one woman. I hope she’s smart enough to …”

Annie’s ringtone was a cat meowing, making Ramona ask, “Do you hear something?”

Annie pointed to her phone. “It’s just my ringtone, one second,” she yelled, followed by a softer, “Hello.”

Noah heard a few uh-huhs before Annie raised her voice again to tell the women, “Loretta just rang. She confirmed it. Jack is coming round again, and Kathleen don’t like it, not even a little bit. He won’t seem to leave that girl be. Also, she asked if anyone had the coupon for ground chuck this week from the Sunday paper.”

The conversation slingshot itself to the cost of milk and cheese before coming back to the gossip as Justine came up to ask the ladies if they would like any dessert.

“Raspberry tea and a slice of coconut pie for each of us,” Annie answered. “And, Justine, we are worried sick about you. How are you holding up?”

“Let me grab a to-go order real quick, and I’ll come back and tell you all about it.” Justine gave them a conspiratorial wink and turned back to the kitchen. That seemed to make the women giddy.

Justine left Noah’s eyesight for a moment but quickly arrived back at his booth with a to-go bag in tow and said, “The back door’s unlocked if you wanna sneak out, I’m gonna try and be good press where I can.”

“I haven’t paid yet.”

“I got it! Now, go!”

The woman was truly a saint. There was no doubting that. Noah slipped back to the speakeasy with his dinner and sat in the quiet, not tasting his food but chewing on what Kathleen had said about Sam.