Chapter Five
True to his word, Gideon arrived at Caroline’s townhouse only two days later, special license in hand.
Her housekeeper showed him in and then left them to their private conversation.
She knew it was only a matter of time before the entire staff knew about the pregnancy, if they didn’t already.
It had actually been Caroline’s lady’s maid who’d alerted her to the fact that she’d missed her monthly courses.
Their time for managing the consequences of their actions was growing slim.
“I called in a favor owed to my father,” Gideon explained as he held up the signed, sealed document that would allow them to forego the reading of the banns and marry as quickly as possible.
“It is nice to know the man was good for something.” He dropped onto the sofa beside her with all the grace and negligence of an overindulged hound, making her bounce a bit and scramble so her sewing wasn’t lost in the cushions.
Most would be surprised to realize how prolific an embroiderer she was, but she’d always enjoyed the task.
It felt as if she were painting with thread instead of a brush.
The repetitive motions and mindless counting served as a pleasant counterpoint to the joyful chaos of the rest of her life.
Hastily packing her work away in its basket, Caroline supposed she shouldn’t have been surprised that Gideon had followed through. The world might think him an unreliable scoundrel, but she and their closest friends knew the truth: There were few people more trustworthy than him.
Her reaction had more to do with the fact that she’d long ago given up any hopes of a proposal, let alone one that would make her a marchioness.
Never mind marriage to Gideon, her closest friend.
Her mind simply could not fathom the speed with which her life had careened onto a new path.
“Really, Gideon, you needn’t do this.” She tried to sound convincing, but she feared her tone gave away how she’d lain awake the previous few nights mulling over her very limited options.
Either she disregarded Gideon’s insistence that they marry and she disappeared into the country, thereby absolving him of what he saw as his responsibility, or she allowed him to press forward with this marriage of necessity and trust that he knew precisely what he was doing.
She’d also have been lying if she claimed the thought of marriage to him didn’t unleash a bevy of flutters in her stomach.
No matter how tempting the prospect, she would never forgive herself if, down the line, he felt as if he’d been trapped.
That was not why she’d mustered the courage to invite him to her bed with no strings attached, and that was certainly not how she intended to move forward now that her choices had caught up with them.
Gideon was an honest, loyal, terribly generous person.
All of these were admirable traits in a man, and they were desirable in a mate.
Still, he was also first and foremost her friend.
The last thing she’d ever intended to do was ruin his life on a whim.
Granted, he’d been a willing participant in said whim, but neither of them had intended this outcome.
Caroline knew she could do far, far worse than Gideon, but that didn’t change the fact that the outcome felt hollow—that she’d somehow cheated her way into a prestigious place in Society by extending the illicit invitation.
At least, that was how she knew her family and many others like them would see things.
The truth of it was far less nefarious than entrapping a good man into marriage…
she’d only wanted to, just once, experience intercourse with a man whom she cared for and trusted.
Her experience was tragically limited, and she’d only wished for something to help blot out the memory of it—to replace it with something better.
“Of course I do,” Gideon replied lightly, snapping Caroline out of her scattered, rambling musings. Despite the joviality of his voice, there was no mistaking the adamancy in the message. He would not budge.
“This is entirely my fault,” Caroline sighed, deflating somewhat. She fought to maintain her composure, but it was a vicious battle. She’d never been an overly emotional person before, but this child in her womb was making her rather weepy—what an inconvenient side effect.
“I am certainly not blameless.” She could hear the kind smile in Gideon’s voice as his hand covered hers in her lap and his thumb stroked her knuckles in that familiar way.
“My curiosity finally got the better of me,” he jested gently.
Caroline tried to smile in return, but it was nearly impossible.
“I am…” She trailed off with a shaky sigh. “I am worried that, one day, you will resent me…and the baby.”
“Caro…” he chided, gently lifting her chin until she finally met his eyes.
His dark brows were knit together in concern.
The hard angle of his jaw was tense. The sincerity in his storm-gray eyes, however, was what finally caused a single tear to spill onto her cheek.
“It won’t be such a bad arrangement. We’ve always gotten on well.
We share history and common interests.” He went on to detail all the ways they suited, but, to Caroline, she couldn’t help believing it all sounded as if she, the baby, and the marriage were a consolation prize into which he’d talked himself into accepting.
Taking a slow breath through her nose, she reminded herself that her emotions were high and she bit her tongue. Gideon was doing his best to be reassuring in their unorthodox situation.
“Besides,” he continued, “I’d have to marry and produce an heir sooner rather than later.
As I see it, you’ve saved me a hell of a lot of trouble and given me a head start.
” The last finally made her crack a smile.
He took both her hands now and squeezed them warmly.
“I suppose we shall have to tame down a little bit as parents, no? Fewer visits to Duke’s and Vauxhall?
And the child’s first words probably should not be ‘win,’ ‘place,’ or ‘show,’ so less time at the races is in order. ”
Caroline’s smile finally bloomed in full. “The only change I will request from you is to put an end to your drunken jousting career.”
Gideon threw his dark head back and laughed heartily, the sound booming through her chest. “I thought you found that hilarious,” he chuckled.
“That was when I had no right to dictate your behavior. Now, as your supposed fiancée, however, I may have to put my foot down against anything that might result in you snapping your neck.”
“For you, I just may make a concession.” He inclined his head gallantly.
“Speaking of fiancée…” Gideon trailed off, reaching into his coat and pulling a dark-blue velvet pouch from an inner pocket.
Unfastening it, he dropped into his palm a glittering gold ring set with a sizable pigeon blood ruby and a quartet of diamond baguettes.
Caroline immediately began shaking her head.
“I couldn’t—”
“It wasn’t my mother’s,” he hastily reassured her, “nor was it ever part of the Swanleigh estate. I didn’t want you to have anything tainted by their bad blood.
” She eyed the beautiful piece longingly, knowing it must have cost a small fortune.
She all but melted when he said, “I purchased it with you in mind, Caro.” A soft smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.
“I won’t force you to wear it—I wouldn’t presume that I can force you to do anything because I know you—but I hope you will at least accept it and keep it. ”
She was utterly helpless in the face of this information. Biting her lip, she plucked the stunning ring from his hand. It was deliciously warm from the heat of his body as she slid it on her middle finger—the only one it would fit.
“We can have it resized,” he reassured her as he took her hand and examined it.
Was it her imagination, or did he linger a bit longer than he should have?
She was so lost in examining the contrast of his long, square fingers as they cradled her much smaller ones that she nearly jumped when he spoke again.
“Now, would you like to accompany me to speak with your family, or shall I go alone?”
Caroline blanched immediately. “Why would you do that?”
“Because we should still obtain your father’s consent to wed…unless you wish to run away together?”
If only he knew how appealing that sounded—especially now.
“I am six and twenty; I reached my majority five years ago.” She spoke rapidly, her insides clenching at the thought of being in the same room as her parents for the first time in years.
“I understand your reticence, but I have thought it over and feel it would be beneficial for us to begin this marriage with their support.”
“They won’t offer it.” Caroline couldn’t recall a time when they’d ever supported her in anything; there was no reason to believe they would start now.
“We cannot know that unless we ask.” He was achingly optimistic.
How had he managed to hold onto that after all this time—after all he had experienced?
“I will go regardless of whether you accompany me or not, though I would prefer we present a united front.” He squeezed her hand again, grounding her in the moment and reminding her she was not alone.
Caroline had not faced her family or spoken to them directly in nearly seven years.
Following the scandal of her debut Season, when she’d been caught in an extremely compromising situation with a young man, they’d immediately cut ties with her.
Her last conversation with her parents had consisted of them handing her paperwork outlining a small pension as bribery to stay away from them and Caroline’s younger sister, Grace.
To keep the stain of her shame well away from all of them.
Gideon knew of The Incident that had precipitated the falling out with her parents, but did not know the full extent of her family’s censure, their bitter venom at the disappointment she was to them.
She could only imagine how her father would react to Gideon’s showing up on their doorstep, forcing an introduction, and then explaining that he’d impregnated their scandal-ridden daughter and planned on marrying her in a rushed ceremony with a special license.
That would quite possibly be an even bigger disaster than her first debacle.
Unfortunately, she realized that, if there were no dissuading Gideon, then she would be forced to accompany him.
It was the only way she might try to mitigate a disaster.
“I will join you,” she finally said in a tone brimming with resignation.
Dread threatened to boil over within her breast, but she knew she had to take solace in the fact that she would not be alone.
If anyone was going to protect her from her family, it was Gideon.
His grin was nearly blinding in its beauty. “Brilliant. We shall go later this afternoon, then.”
It continued to cause Caroline no small amount of pain that the thought of interacting with the two people who were supposed to care for her and support her the most in this world were the ones whose vicious verbal barbs had filled her life with discomfort and anxiety. It had always been that way with them.
Mama and Papa had sat her down shortly before her seventeenth birthday and informed her in no uncertain terms that her debut marked her recognition as an official representative of the Wells family and the Fischer viscountcy; as such, she was expected to maintain the utmost decorum and comport herself in a manner befitting a lady.
Rather than bolster her, their firm warnings had only increased her nerves exponentially, making her feel as if she’d swallowed an entire hive of angry bees.
Caroline would have gladly sold every beautiful dress they’d ordered for her first Season if only Mama had held her hand; if only Papa had smiled and reassured her that all would be well.
Unfortunately, that was not the household she’d been born into.
In place of affection, she was peppered with warnings and lessons.
Instead of praise, she was told only how she might have improved.
She lived in constant fear of making a mistake.
Nearly every night leading up to her debut, she awoke in a cold sweat from nightmares where she’d done something wrong; her mother wailed over the embarrassment, and her father’s scowl could freeze a kettle of boiling water.
Those nights, she would crawl into Grace’s bed and take comfort beside her sweet younger sister’s warm body as they held one another close.
Grace always smelled of sunshine and sweets, and she was the best comfort Caroline had in that home.
Unfortunately, she had not spoken to her sister in years.
Her parents made formidable gatekeepers.
They hadn’t deemed her appropriate company for their unsullied daughter and had refused her any access to Grace since the day of Caroline’s disgrace.
“Have you heard from your brother again?” she asked, abruptly changing the subject when her eyes began to sting.
Gideon shook his head. “Though I cannot blame him. It was a remarkable discovery. I am certain he requires time to process it.” He stared off, unseeing, at the nearby window.
The sofa was positioned just right so she might watch the passersby as she read or sewed.
Several silent seconds passed like this until Gideon shook off his unease, the glint in his eyes returning.
“Why don’t we see your parents now, hm?” Caroline’s stomach plummeted when she realized her plan to switch topics had backfired spectacularly.
Rather than preoccupying him with another conversation, it had only turned his mind toward family and made him want to settle matters with her parents at that very moment.
Caroline attempted to splutter a refusal, but he heard none of it as he pulled her to her feet and went about having her spencer and other traveling accessories brought down.
The Swanleigh carriage was already waiting in front of the townhouse, so, in less than a quarter of an hour, Caroline was—much to her horror—swept out the door and set on her way to visit her childhood home.