11
Our conversation must have relaxed Nick because he dug into the food without hesitation. The reviews hadn’t lied: the food was bursting with flavour, and even the way each dish was presented on the plate was like a miniature piece of art.
As soon as we finished one plate, another arrived from the kitchen: crispy pork belly drizzled with soy caramel sauce, kingfish sashimi served with ponzu yuzu and salt and pepper squid with shallots and chilli sauce.
After we finished eating, Nick poured us both a cup of water while I nursed my stomach, which was so full it ached.
“That was good,” he said.
I brightened. “Yeah?”
“Don’t think it’s worth fifty bucks a person, but… yeah it was good.”
I smiled at his reluctant admission. “I’m glad,” I said. “I wanted to take you somewhere nice.”
He frowned. “This is for me?”
“Why wouldn’t it be?”
He shrugged. “I guess I thought you went to fancy places like this all the time.”
“Nah. I rarely eat out, anyway.” I cleared my throat. “I, uh… I actually have a confession to make.”
I didn’t miss the way his shoulders stiffened. “What?”
I took a deep breath. “I realised that our lessons aren’t purely academic for me anymore. I’m attracted to you. It’s not just guys I like, okay? It’s you.”
Nick stared at me.
I scrambled to think of something to say. “I just thought it would be unethical to continue without telling you.”
“How would it be unethical?”
Wasn’t it obvious? “I can’t continue under false pretences. Our lessons would mean something different to me now because…” I swallowed. “Because I’d be enjoying it.”
“You weren’t enjoying it before?”
“Well, yes,” I admitted. “Learning is always fun.”
Nick rubbed the bridge of his nose. “So all those times we practised kissing, you were only enjoying it in a wow-this-is-so-interesting-to-learn-about way?”
“Is there something wrong with that?” I asked, then caught sight of his expression. “Hang on. Were you enjoying it?”
“God fucking Christ,” Nick muttered. “Every time I think I start to understand you, I’m reminded how much of a weirdo you are.”
“Okay, there’s no need to insult me,” I said.
“Of course I fucking enjoyed it,” he said over me. “Do you think I kiss people out of charity?”
I was stunned. “You said you agreed to help me because I reminded you of some pathetic, clueless loser,” I pointed out.
“Ignore what I said. Half the time, I’m talking bullshit.”
I was still utterly confused. “So just to clarify, you are attracted to me? Or do you just enjoy kissing people generally—”
“Yes, I’m fucking into you, Hayden,” he snapped.
My body felt weightless, and I couldn’t suppress the wide smile that spread across my face, but I managed to reply. “You don’t have to sound so pissed about it.”
He blinked, then seemed to deflate. “Sorry,” he said. He glanced around the restaurant, then met my eyes. “You didn’t have to take me somewhere so nice just to tell me you want to fuck me.”
His bluntness sent a shiver down my spine. “I wanted to show I was sincere. Besides, I thought if I took you out for a nice meal, it would improve my chances.”
“You could’ve told me in your bedroom. You’d get the same answer.” Once again, his gaze flickered over the expensive furniture and well-dressed patrons. “Taking me somewhere like this… to be honest, I thought you were going to confess that you were in love with me or something.”
“Oh,” I said. “Sorry if I disappointed you.”
His eyes widened. “No, no, I’m not disappointed at all. Actually, I’m relieved.”
I frowned. “Why? I feel like I should be offended right now.”
“It’s not you,” Nick said quickly. “I’m just not a relationship person.”
“Really? I thought you would’ve had, like, a hundred girlfriends.”
He shook his head.
“Why?”
Half of me expected him to tell me to mind my own business. Instead, he pulled his glass of water close and pushed it across the table from one hand to the other. “It’s not something I’m interested in. Why go through the trouble when I can stick to the fun stuff?” He cast a sideways glance at me, and it sent a spark through my body all the way to my groin.
“Let me pay you back,” Nick said a few minutes later as we left the restaurant. “I can transfer you. What’s your PayID?”
“Don’t worry about it,” I replied. “It’s my treat, okay? I’m serious.”
“I’m paying for dessert then.”
“You don’t have to.” We don’t need dessert. We can go back to mine and make out on my bed.
“I know a good gelato place,” he said, voice firm with resolve. “We’ll share a cup.”
He led me down the grid-like streets of Melbourne’s CBD until we arrived at Flinders Lane. The narrow street reminded me of Paris or Rome, with little restaurants squashed side by side and wooden tables and chairs cramped on the cobblestones.
The gelato shop was busy despite the cool weather. We sampled a few of the flavours and settled on salted caramel, getting a large cup with two spoons.
We sat at one of the free tables outside. The surface of the table was a little sticky, and the stools wobbled on the stone path, but the gelato was so tasty that none of that mattered.
“So, Kiss and Tell. Why’d you choose that place?” Nick asked.
“I looked for recommendations online, and it had good reviews.” I popped my spoon into my mouth, the mix of salt and sweet flavours bursting on my tastebuds.
“Is there anything you don’t research?”
“I just don’t like to make mistakes.”
“Mistakes?”
I gave him a look because was he being dense on purpose? “You know, like taking you to the wrong type of restaurant.”
He still looked confused.
“Sophie dumped me because I wasn’t good in bed,” I explained. “Maybe if I wasn’t, we’d still be together. I’m not saying that I’m still sad over her, because I’m not, but I can’t do it again. I can’t drive someone away, and ignorance isn’t an excuse. That’s why I’ve got to learn, so next time, I don’t screw it up.”
“Screw it up how? By taking them to a KFC?”
“I mean, yeah, that’s an example.”
He closed his eyes for a moment, looking impatient. “If someone really likes you, they won’t care where you take them. If someone really likes you, they’ll happily hang out with you in a parking lot.”
“A parking lot?” I echoed.
“You know what I mean,” he said with a wave of his hand. “When someone likes you, you don’t need to try.”
“That’s easy for you to say,” I said. “I bet everyone likes you. You’re handsome and cool and experienced. I need to try to make people like me. In fact, I can barely believe you’re into me. You can barely believe it. You call me weird all the time.”
“You are weird,” he insisted. “You asked me, a total stranger, to teach you to be good in bed. You begged me to teach you. You kissed and touched and wanked in front of me like it was completely normal. I tried to tell myself a million times to stop our arrangement. It’s ridiculous. You’re ridiculous. And I can’t stop thinking about you.”
I stared.
“Your body,” he corrected. “I can’t stop thinking about your body. You’re too tall, and you’re too skinny, and you shouldn’t be my type at all, and yet…” His tongue rolled around behind his cheek like his mouth had gone dry. “When you sucked my fingers, that was probably the hottest thing that ever happened to me, and you only touched my fingers. My fingers . It’s fucking annoying.”
I felt like if the breeze changed, I’d blow away like a flimsy paper bag. I found my voice. “Could you say all of that again, but more nicely?”
“If anyone else asked me to teach them to be good in bed, I would’ve told them to piss off,” he said. “But you’re… you’re just so…” He made an irritated sound. “What I’m trying to say is that you don’t need to try to make people like you. If someone likes you, they won’t be able to help themselves. Despite their better judgement.”
I wasn’t sure what to say to that. In the end, I settled on, “Every nice thing you say to me is backhanded.”
“This is as nice as I’m gonna get.”
“No. Sometimes you’re nicer.”
He looked sceptical. “Like when?”
I poked the ice cream with my spoon. It was melting. “When you’re in my bedroom. You stop scowling, and you don’t smile exactly, but your breathing gets ragged, and your skin goes pink, and sometimes you actually compliment me. Like when you said A plus.”
Nick buried his head in his hands.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“I didn’t realise I was so pathetic.” His voice was slightly muffled.
My brows flew up. “You’re not pathetic, not at all. It’s hot. I prefer that to your usual grumpy bossiness. Although, I suppose that’s pretty hot too.”
Nick removed his hands from his face. I expected him to look at me like I was an oddity, the way he usually did. But instead, there was something almost… unsure in his eyes.
“Have some more,” I said, tilting the cup of ice cream towards Nick.
That seemed to shock him out of his reverie. He nodded and stabbed his spoon into the gelato, a crease between his brows like he was lost in thought.
“My sister’s having a Miss Marple marathon with her friend,” I said.
“Mm.”
“At the friend’s house.”
“That’s cool.” He seemed to be barely listening.
“I’m trying to say that my apartment’s empty.”
Nick looked up at me. He was like a hissing cat whose eyes suddenly went big and round the moment you shook the treats bag.
“Would you like to come back to mine, after this?”
“Yes,” Nick said.
After we finished the ice cream—Nick let me have the final spoonful—we walked back to my apartment. The city wasn’t as crowded as I expected for a Saturday night. There were families and a few couples around, but I supposed the clubbing crowd didn’t come out until later.
Once we arrived at my place, I flicked the lights on, and we padded to my bedroom. After I closed the door, I stood there, feeling my mind go blank. “Shit,” I said. “I’ve completely forgotten everything I’ve learned.”
“Fuck the lessons,” Nick said. “Do what feels good to you.”
“I can’t fuck the lessons!” I said. “They’re important. I take education very seriously—”
Nick grabbed the front of my jumper and kissed me hard on the mouth. “Get on the bed,” he murmured against my lips.
I stared, breathless. “Yes, teacher,” I replied, moving backwards so I was sitting on the mattress, my back against the headboard.
“Don’t call me that.”
“What should I call you?”
He faltered. “Nick,” he said.
“Can you take your clothes off, Nick?”
Once again, he faltered, which made me feel privately victorious. Then he pulled off his sweater and pants, so he was in nothing but his grey jocks. He climbed onto the bed towards me in the same jaguar-like fashion he had the very first time he’d come here. Back then, I’d been a fascinated pupil. Now, I got instantly hard.
As soon as Nick arrived between my spread legs, I reached for his shoulders, pulling him down so I could kiss him, my hands roaming across the smooth expanse of his back. “How are you so hot?” I murmured.
“Genetics, diet and exercise,” he replied.
“You think I’m weird, but you’re kind of odd yourself, you know that?”
“I’m not.”
I grinned and kissed him again.
We made out for what felt like an hour but was probably closer to twenty minutes. It was both chaste and extremely heated at the same time. Our tongues and bodies slid together, and I was genuinely afraid that I’d come in my pants.
When we pulled away for breath, Nick rolled over to lie beside me, his body facing mine, his hands tucked under his head. I scoured the details of his face. His olive skin, dark pink in the places I’d sucked. His hazel eyes, green in the right light. His sharp eyes, now softened, and his neat hair, now dishevelled. For so long, he’d been handsome in an untouchable way, but he was way prettier like this, flushed and human.
“It’s like I’m a virgin again,” I said.
“How?”
“You’re the first guy I’ve been with,” I said. “And it feels different with you.”
“You’re the first guy I’ve been with too,” Nick admitted. “I’ve noticed men, but I’ve never…” he trailed off. “Tyler’s going to be so annoying when he finds out.”
“Have you and Tyler ever…”
He scrunched up his nose. “Ew, no. Not even as a passing thought.”
I laughed. “So you’ve never had a fling with a guy?”
He shook his head. “Only girls. And even then, they were all of a physical nature.”
“Surely some of them wanted more.”
He shrugged.
I poked his bicep to get him to talk.
“I don’t know. I’ve noticed that people like me best when I’m out of reach.”
“I like you right now.”
Nick gave me a look, and before he could say anything, I grabbed him and pulled him close to my side. “And you’re not out of reach right now,” I said with an evil laugh.
“You’re suffocating me,” Nick said.
“Oh, sorry.” I loosened my grip around his torso.
“It’s okay.”
“It’s okay for me to suffocate you?” I wiggled my brows at him. “Kinky.”
“No, I—” he cut himself off, huffed impatiently, and burrowed his face into my chest, probably so he didn’t have to look at me.
I laughed and tugged him closer.
“Hey, Nick?” I whispered.
“Mm?”
“What is this?” I asked. “I know you’re not supposed to ask that question, but I like everything to be clearly defined. Should we ditch the lessons? Or should we continue? I have a lot to learn. And are we friends? I’d like to be friends. And are we allowed to see other people? Are you seeing other people right now?” I clamped my mouth shut to stop myself from rambling.
He took a moment to respond. “I don’t think there’s any point having sex lessons,” he said, pulling away from my chest so he could look at me properly. “Honestly, I doubt there was ever any point. I thought you were an adequate kisser from the very first lesson.”
“I don’t—”
“You don’t want to be adequate, you want an A plus, yes I know,” he said. “But right now, I’m as clueless as you. Like I said, I’ve never been with a guy before.”
I nodded.
“We can be friends,” he continued. “No, I’m not seeing other people right now. Yes, we’re allowed to see other people, but we should let each other know before we do.”
“Okay,” I said. “Anything else?”
Nick rested his head against my chest again. “Don’t fall in love with me.”
I laughed. “Come on. I had a hard enough time getting you to tell me your last name.”