25
We made it back to my place in a record fifteen minutes, holding hands as we left the concrete parking lot and running to catch a tram because we were too impatient to walk the whole way.
My body felt electric with anticipation. As we stood in the elevator on the way up to my level, we didn’t talk, but I felt like I might explode.
I unlocked the front door to the apartment. As soon as I closed it behind us, before I even had the lights on, Nick kissed me. Just a quick peck on the lips. Then again, deeper this time, and then we were stumbling through the dark to my bedroom when we collapsed on my bed, and I had just enough brain power to reach over and switch on my bedside table lamp so I could look at Nick.
He was breathing heavily, his pupils dilated.
“You’re my boyfriend,” I said.
“Mmm.” It was a deep, gravelly, erotic noise.
I kissed him hard, pushing one hand through his soft hair and another up his shirt, feeling smooth skin and toned muscle. I wanted to lick his abdomen. I pressed my hips flush against his, feeling the delicious hardness of him.
Then I thought of the last time we’d been in my bed. Nick, as if sensing I was lost in thought, stilled and pulled back so he could look at me properly.
“What’s wrong?”
“Do you… did you want to try anal again? Not now. It doesn’t have to be now. But… we never talked about it.”
He didn’t say anything. Had I ruined everything?
“No,” he said quietly. “I don’t have any burning desire to try it again. I think… I think I wanted to do it for the wrong reasons.”
“What reasons?” I asked.
His chest rose and fell with a deep breath. “I felt like I’d disappointed you because we didn’t go all the way.”
“What?” I grabbed his hand. “You didn’t. Did I make you feel that way?”
He shook his head. “No. Maybe I got in my head. I just… sex is less scary than talking, and… I wanted to give something to you without having to say it.”
“Oh, Nick.” I squeezed his hand. “This is more than enough for me.”
“You can’t be satisfied with hand stuff and blow jobs all the time.”
I blinked at him. “Are you kidding? That sounds like heaven.” I paused. “Wait—is it not good enough for you?”
“No. I mean, yes. I mean, it is good enough. It’s more than enough. But… I wanted to do something special. I don’t know. It’s stupid.”
“It’s not stupid,” I said, sort of understanding where he was coming from. People talked about ‘going all the way’.
“I guess I wanted to be even closer to you,” Nick continued, cheeks now stained a cherry red. “I want to look into your eyes. And to kiss you while we’re doing it.”
“We can kiss while using our hands,” I said.
He made a shruggy noise of acknowledgement.
“Do you… do you want to do it now?”
His eyes met mine. “Do you?”
I let out a breath of laughter. “I don’t think I’ll ever not want to touch you.”
Slowly, his hand curled around mine, flipping it over to reveal my wrist, which was more pale and slightly less freckled than the rest of my body. He lowered his head and pressed a kiss there.
I sucked in a breath, taking in the sight of his bowed head, his hair, the fan of his lashes. I took his chin with my fingers and tilted his head up, then kissed him. Being with him like this was like exhaling after holding my breath for a year.
Nick’s hands curled into my arms, blunt fingernails digging into my skin, and I slid my own hands down to his waist and pulled him into my lap. He moaned right into my mouth, and it was the hottest thing in the world, and I could feel myself growing hard and heavy in my pants.
“Clothes,” he said against my lips. He tugged at my shirt. “Take it off.”
“Okay, baby,” I said. “Can I call you that?”
“You can call me whatever you want.” He was still playing with the hem of my T-shirt, so I regretfully let go of him to yank it off, and I knew my body wasn’t special, but Nick was staring at my shoulders like he’d never seen something so captivating.
I started pulling at his clothes and stripped with a few efficient movements, chucking the handful of fabric over the edge of the bed. I liked how he did that.
My eyes trailed down his body, starting at his neck and finishing on his feet. I wanted to take a bite of his calves. I restrained myself.
“Jocks,” I said before fiddling with my own pants.
“Bossy,” Nick replied, but he took them off, and soon we were both completely naked. Nick slotted himself back into my lap, and I looked past my own erection—I couldn’t care less about it in that moment—at his hard, flushed length.
“Your cock’s so pretty,” I murmured.
“Hayden.” There was a laugh in his voice.
“I’m serious.” I reached out, my thumb and forefinger gently touching the head and then pushing the foreskin down. “This is the kind of cock they should make statues of. You know how there are those Greek statues with tiny, flaccid penises? Well fuck that, they should sculpt you instead.”
I looked up to see Nick biting the inside of his cheek.
“Well,” he said, like he couldn’t help himself, “if they sculpted erect dicks, that’d be totally obscene. And back in those days, tiny dicks were the ideal. Something about self-restraint or whatever.” He blushed. “I should not be talking about art history right now.”
“No,” I said, gently stroking his cock up and down. “Keep going.”
He shoved my shoulder. I laughed, then returned my gaze to his erection, heavy in my hand. “I’m serious about it being pretty,” I said. “It’s taking all of me not to put it in my mouth.”
“Why don’t you?”
“Because,” I said, meeting his gaze. “You said you wanted to look me in the eyes.”
I wrapped an arm around his waist and shifted him even closer so his length was erect against mine, and curled a hand around us both.
He gasped, then dug his hands into my shoulders and kissed me.
We made out lazily as I rubbed my thumb around our tips, coaxing out pearls of pre-cum and using that to slick up our cocks. My strokes were slow and languid, but soon I wanted more—more speed, more pressure. By the looks of things, Nick wanted it too, because he was jerking his hips ever so slightly, trying to get more sensation.
He pulled his mouth from mine, heavy hot breath gusting over my lips. “We need lube,” he said.
“Right,” I replied, my body already tensing at the image of our cocks all slippery, my hand gliding up and down at the punishing pace. I reached over for my bedside table, and Nick eased himself off me to make it easier for me.
I immediately missed the weight of him, so I made quick work of digging through the drawer. I’d put a whole lot of crap at the front in case Elena or someone else went snooping in my room, so it took a moment for me to pull out the bottle of lube from the very back.
That’s when my Fleshlight rolled forward. I stared at it a second, then picked it up and showed Nick.
He took it from me, eyes lighting up, and turned it up and down, inspecting the transparent silicone. “For you? Or me?”
“For both of us.”
He looked at me. “We’re not both going to fit in this tiny hole.”
“Why not? I’ve seen people do it online.”
His lips quirked up. I loved his little smiles. “As part of your ‘research’?”
I didn’t respond, instead squirting lube onto my hand, letting it warm slightly with my body heat, then slathering it over our cocks. Nick let out a sharp exhale, which made me feel smug. I got myself slicked up too, and the wet sound of stroking us both up and down was so obscene, yet so hot at the same time.
“Try it on yourself first,” I said.
He hesitated, and I grinned. “You know you want to.”
He gave me a little frown, but he did as I said and lined up his cockhead with the entrance of the toy. He pushed it down onto himself and let out a grunt before the frown returned. “It’s a little…”
“What?”
“I don’t know. Cold?”
“It warms up with time.”
Slowly, he stroked himself with the toy, and watching the micro-expressions pass his face made my balls tighten. Soon, I couldn’t stand to just watch any longer.
I reached for the Fleshlight. Nick let go, and I took control, focusing it on the tip of his cock, and his jaw went slack. I bit back a smile, slowly upping the pace and then slowing it down again, secretly amused at the crease that began to form between his eyebrows.
“Stop teasing me,” he said. Maybe he intended to growl, but the words came out pleading.
“Do you want to come?” I whispered.
His eyes flashed wide, but he shook his head. He reached for my forgotten yet still-erect cock, and the brush of his warm hands made my spine tingle. “Not without you,” he said. “Let’s do it together.”
“Okay.”
As he slid the toy off himself, I pulled him closer so our erections were flush. Nick eased the toy on. At first, it slipped away, so he tried again, holding the toy tighter, and with a pop, both of the cockheads sank inside.
I had to suck in my stomach to deal with the sensation. It was tight in a way I’d never experienced before, and Nick was pressed up against me, hot and throbbing.
He pushed the toy down so both of our lengths were enveloped. The sight of flesh tight within the transparent silicone was enough to make my balls twitch. “Oh, fuck.”
Nick’s jaw was tight, his knuckles white where he gripped the toy. He pushed the Fleshlight up, then down, before letting go. “You do it,” he said, voice a pant.
“Can’t handle it?” I teased.
His impatient glare was undercut by his pink cheeks. “We’re leaking pre-cum all over each other. So, no, I’m not feeling especially self-controlled right now—” His sentence was cut off with a moan as I moved the toy up and down, creating a wet noise, and his eyes fluttered shut. “Oh fucking hell,” he muttered.
“Kiss me,” I said.
He kissed me like it was some sort of antidote. I closed my eyes and surrendered myself to the moment. There was a gorgeous man in my lap and he was mine.
“You like me,” I said.
“I love you.”
The breath was knocked out of me. “You love me?” I asked.
“I love you,” he repeated. “Don’t go, okay.” It wasn’t a question.
I answered anyway. “I won’t. You’re mine.”
He made a little noise that went straight to my cock, and I couldn’t help myself anymore—I stroked the toy with reckless abandon until it was a blur between our bodies, and Nick was whimpering in a way I’d never heard before.
“Your moans are so hot,” I murmured. “You’re going to make me come.”
“Do it,” he replied, voice weak. “I want to feel it on me.”
My mind conjured up an image of me spilling into the toy, coating Nick’s flushed length in white. I thought of our cum mingling and mixing together, a lewd mess, and my body went rigid as I climaxed, my mind going blank.
Vaguely, I became aware of heat and a bitten-back moan, and Nick’s sweaty body slumped against mine.
My cock twitched with oversensitivity, and I slid the toy off, then half-heartedly cleaned up the mess we’d made with a handful of tissues taken from the box on my bedside table.
Nick closed his eyes. I saw the sweat cooling on his forehead. “You got a job?” he murmured.
I laughed. “That’s the first thing you ask me after that?”
“What am I supposed to say?”
“I don’t know. Maybe something about the toy? I could buy you one, you know. For your birthday or something.”
“Don’t,” Nick said. “I’ll just use yours.”
“Okay,” I replied. “And yeah, I’m working at a pizza shop. I might as well do something during the summer that I can put on my resume.”
“Are you going back home for Christmas?”
“Yeah, for Christmas and New Year’s. Are you?”
He shook his head no. “I’ll celebrate at Yiayia’s.” He was quiet for a moment, then opened his eyes and looked at me. “Hayden?”
“Yeah?”
“I saw that… that you don’t have your mum in your keychain anymore.”
“Oh,” I replied. “Yeah, I…”
I told him what had happened. The conversations I had with Elena and my dad. “I just… don’t feel the need to carry her around with me anymore. Maybe I’ll change my mind later. I don’t know.” I shrugged. “It’s a relief to know it wasn’t my fault, though. I always thought she left because I was an awful son. I used to think to myself, if only I had another chance, I could show her that I was worth staying for…” I trailed off, staring at nothing.
He took my hand and squeezed it. “I meant what I said before. It wasn’t just because we were in the heat of the moment.” Nick’s eyes were intent on mine, and I could see the hint of fear in them. “I love you, Hayden. I don’t want you to try to be some perfect boyfriend, because I love you the way you are. Okay?”
“Okay,” I said.
We lay there for a bit, looking at each other. Everything had happened so quickly. Hours earlier, it had just been another night. Then Nick showed up, and we went to the place we first met, and then we had dinner, then dessert at a parking lot—
“Oh,” I said. “Ohhhh.”
“What?”
“I just figured out why you took me to a random parking lot.”
Nick buried his face in a pillow. “You’re only figuring that out now?”
I poked at him. “Hey. Why are you hiding from me?”
“Because it’s cheesy,” he mumbled.
“The whole evening was cheesy,” I pointed out. “But I love that stuff.”
“I know you do,” he said, removing the pillow to look at me.
“It was perfect.”
“Yeah?” he asked.
“Yeah.” I took his hand. “Come on. Let’s go shower together.”
THE END