4. Hallie
HALLIE
G rowing up in Starlight Bay hadn’t felt as wonderful as everyone made it out to be. I’d been trying to get out of here since I was a teenager, but maybe that had less to do with the beach and the tourists and more to do with feeling lost.
I’d always wanted to be my sister growing up. She’s older than me and was so cool . She always seemed like she knew what she wanted.
But that hadn’t been entirely true.
My hero worship of her had faded in the last couple of years of high school and had dissolved completely after she’d broken up with Sawyer. I was hurt for him and the way she’d acted like he was holding her back, only for her to go out and marry someone she’d just met a few months later.
That had been a disaster, and unsurprisingly, they divorced after only being married a couple of months. Looking out at the ocean and the gentle roll of the waves onto the shore, I can’t even remember his name. She’d called it an act of rebellion.
But I’d been mad—outraged—and hurt even though I had no right to be. Her choices had nearly destroyed our relationship, and standing on this beach, I think I finally know why.
Pulling my phone from the back pocket of my shorts, I dial my sister’s number and wait for the call to connect.
“I’ve been waiting for this call,” she teases, her voice light and happy, and my heart squeezes a little. She worked hard after her divorce to find herself, to be better—happy—and she’d gone out of her way to fix what she’d broken between us.
“It’s weird being back home,” I tell her, my toes digging into the sand as my flip-flops dangle from my other hand.
“I bet. How’s Sawyer?”
“He’s more growly than I remember.” I can feel my face flush and not because I’m upset by his demeanor.
No.
I’m turned on.
She chuckles. “Well, if anyone can handle him it’s you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
She laughs harder, and I wait until she’s composed enough to speak. “I’m just saying I think you guys would be great together. He always had a soft spot for you, and you were always starry-eyed over him.”
“I was not. He was just nice to me, that’s all.” The excuse sounds weak to my own ears, and the confirmation that she hears it too is reflected in the way her tone softens.
“I know.”
“Then what are you saying?”
“I’m saying that I regret how I handled things, not that they ended. I was never meant to be with Sawyer. Hell, I was never meant to be with a man.” She sighs but it’s dreamy. “I made a lot of mistakes, Hallie, but they all led me to Piper and I can’t regret that.”
“I’ve never asked you to,” I tell her, my eyebrows slashing down.
“Sorry. All of that to say that if you have a connection with Sawyer, I think that the two of you together would be great.”
Now it’s my turn to laugh. “He’s letting me stay with him as a favor—nothing else.” Even as I say the words, I know they’re not entirely true.
“Well, whatever happens, I love you, and take some pictures of the beach for me.”
“I will. I’ll talk to you soon.”
I’m not sure what I was expecting, but as I make my way back to the house, there’s a potent mix of excitement and uncertainty.
“I’m just saying I think you guys would be great together. He always had a soft spot for you, and you were always starry-eyed over him.”
Is that true?
Is it enough?
I guess we’re about to find out.
“Did you hear my sister and her wife bought a new house?” I ask casually as Sawyer and I eat pizza on the back deck. It’s warm out but the breeze is nice, and once I start my shift tomorrow, I won’t be seeing much of the sun.
I hadn’t been able to shake the conversation with Beth as I did laundry and packed and unpacked and repacked my bag for the hospital. Denying I want Sawyer is a losing game, and if there’s a chance he wants me, there’s no harm in us indulging while I’m here.
I just need to make sure things with him and Beth are completely in the past. It’s been a decade, but I don’t want him to look at me and see her.
Because that’s weird.
And gross.
Sawyer opens his mouth and closes it without responding before shaking his head. “Just what was on the Christmas card.”
“Their dogs are really cute.” He stares at me and blinks like he’s not sure how we went from talking about the pros and cons of ice cream versus snow cones in the summer to this . All right, fine. “Do you still have feelings for my sister?”
“What?” he asks, his expression surprised, although I have no clue why that would be. It’s an obvious question.
“My sister. Are you still in love with her?”
“Hallie, it’s been more than a decade.”
“And?”
Exhaling heavily through his nose, he stares at me, so much so that I have to fight the urge to squirm under his scrutiny.
“I was upset when she broke things off, and I was pissed when she married that guy she met right after she left me.” He sighs. “Not too proud to admit I was more than a little smug when that crashed and burned.” His palm grips the back of his neck as he stares at something behind me.
“And?” I prod because I need to know. Sawyer Kade, by all accounts, has been a bachelor since my sister broke his heart. My mom had told me as much. I just can’t figure out why.
“And nothing. I’m happy for her and Piper.
She called out of the blue something like six months after they started dating and she apologized.
Said she never meant to hurt me but knew something wasn’t right.
” Looking back at me, he lifts a shoulder and lets it drop.
“She invited me to the wedding. I sent a gift because my brother was being promoted to sheriff that same weekend.”
“That’s good to know.”
“Is it?” he asks before taking a bite of his pizza, his arms flexing as he rests his elbows on the table.
“Mm-hmm,” I manage, shoving a mozzarella stick in my mouth to prevent me from telling him that since we cleared that up, I’d like to ride his face now, please.
Ugh.
“You sure? Because I’m gonna have to switch to whiskey if you have any follow-up questions.” He motions to the bottle on the table. “This beer won’t be enough.”
Holding my hands up in surrender, I smile.
“I promise you’re safe.”
Heat simmers in his gaze, and now I have to wonder if maybe I’m the one who isn’t safe, and I really, really don’t mind that at all.