7. Connor James
CHAPTER 7
CONNOR JAMES
NATE
The bass pounds through the floorboards, but can't drown out the roaring in my ears as Connor’s fingers trace paths across Nora’s body. Each touch is a match strike against my skin. My jaw clenches as bile rises in my throat watching him stake his claim. The jealousy burns close, a wildfire spreading through my chest with nowhere to fucking go.
I should be past this.
Should be immune to the way she still pulls at something deep in my chest. But watching Connor touch her with such casual possession makes my blood surge hot and deadly, obliterating what little high I had left.
Keep telling yourself that, Nate.
I grab another drink and a bottle of water, shoving my way outside where the night air clings to my skin like a second shadow. Finding a quiet spot away from the party's relentless heartbeat, I collapse onto a weathered bench. The weight of every bad choice I've made settles over me like a burial shroud. I'm the reason we're strangers now, why this gulf between us only grows wider with each passing day. Regret sits like stone in my chest as I wonder how to fix something that might be beyond repair.
The click of my lighter briefly illuminates the darkness. I inhale deep, hold the smoke until my lungs burn, then exhale through my nose. The nicotine barely touches the edge of my tension. Having her close is torture, but her absence is its own special kind of hell. This summer already feels like a lifetime too long. I'll spend it chain-smoking and drinking, trying to numb the parts of me that still yearn for her.
The air shifts and I know she's here before I see her. Nora emerges onto the patio, her breathing measured as she leans against a pillar. Like gravity, I find myself moving toward her despite every instinct screaming to maintain distance. I rest my elbows on the railing beside her.
"You should reconsider who you spend your time with."
She turns, arms crossed. "Does that include you?"
My lips curl into a smirk.
There she is.
"Just looking out for you."
"And why are you all of a sudden acknowledging my existence now?" The challenge in her voice makes my pulse skip.
I can't tell her I never stopped being aware of her. That she's been a constant hum under my skin since we were kids. The pull ebbed during freshman year but never truly faded. She's always there, a persistent rhythm in my chest that I can't shake.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" I ask, trying to decode the mystery in her eyes.
"I'm just trying to figure out which Nate I'm getting now. The considerate one or the arrogant one.”
"I just thought you'd have standards when it comes to company," I bite out, fury and frustration tangling in my throat.
"That's rich coming from you. I thought you had taste." She nods toward Farrah downing another shot. "Guess we were both wrong."
Silence stretches between us, thick with unspoken words. She takes another long drink.
"You need to slow down," I say, concern bleeding through my anger.
She leans against the railing, and I force myself to meet her gaze. Even in the dim light, she's devastating—all forest-green eyes and quiet defiance. It's like playing with matches in a room full of gasoline.
"Are you keeping tabs on me now?"
I ignore her question, holding out the water bottle. "Drink it."
She accepts with an eye roll, taking slow sips. "You don't need to babysit me, Nate. I'm not five anymore."
"I'm not trying to babysit you, I just—" The words tangle in my throat. "My mom would kill me if she knew I let you get wasted and hang out with that dickwad."
"Well, Nate," she steps closer, confidence radiating from her like heat, "I'm not your problem or a chore you need to handle, so you don't need to worry about me."
I study her, thrown off balance by her certainty. Her eyes catch me, pulling me in like they always have. "I don't see you as either of those things."
The music fades to white noise as we lock eyes. Having her this close soothes an ache I've been carrying so long I forgot it was there.
"Whatever. I'm not here to play whatever twisted games you're pushing. We can just go back to ignoring each other." She turns to leave, but instinct makes me reach for her arm.
She flinches.
The reaction hits me like a physical blow. Fear flashes across her face as she wraps her arms around herself, staring at the floor.
I release her immediately, stepping back to give her space. When she finally looks up, the sadness in her eyes makes my jaw clench with guilt. There's something else there too, but she looks away before I can name it.
Connor's arrival shatters the moment.
"Got that drink you asked for," he says with a smug grin that makes my fists itch, balancing two cups in his hands. My jaw tightens as he drapes an arm around her shoulders.
"Farrah's been looking for you, man," he adds, nodding toward the bar where she's shooting daggers at me.
Without breaking eye contact, I step forward and pluck one of the drinks from Connor's hand. His smile falters as I tilt my head back and drain the entire drink in one continuous gulp, the liquor burning a path down my throat. I crush the empty cup back into his palm before gesturing at the water bottle in Nora’s hand.
"Drink more water," I manage through clenched teeth before turning to head inside.
"He's insane. I'd watch myself with that one.” Connor's chuckle follows me, and it takes everything I have not to show him what real insanity looks like. But Nora doesn't need to see that side of me, not here, not now.
I bite my tongue and keep walking.
Fucking progress.
Weaving through the crowded house, my thoughts as dense as the press of bodies, I wonder how I let her get under my skin again. Unease gnaws at me knowing she's out there with Connor. I need to find Jake—he brought her here, maybe she'll listen to him. But first, I need to find Christian.
Just one more hit to get through this night.
"Where's the weed?"
"Sure you don't want to try something a little stronger?"
Yes.
"No. Where's the weed?"
"It's not like Nate Sullivan to turn down a??—"
"Give me a fucking joint. I'm not asking again."
"Jesus, chill man." Christian hands me a joint, annoyance flickering in his eyes. I snatch it and storm out, hoping to find Nora alone, Connor nowhere in sight. But the patio is empty. Panic claws at my chest—Connor is bad news, and if that son of a bitch touches her...
The backyard reveals nothing but typical party chaos. They couldn't have gone back inside; I'd have felt her presence. There's only one other place he'd take her to be alone.
Farrah's voice cuts through my thoughts like a rusty blade. "Nate! Are you going to ignore me the entire night?"
"Have you seen my brother?"
"Are you serious right now?"
"Have you seen him or not?"
"Oh, so I have to answer all your questions, but you get to ignore mine?"
"Fine," I snap, turning to face her. "Yes, I'm ignoring you. No, I don't want to fuck you. Yes, I'm preoccupied. No, I don't want to discuss it. Now, have you seen my brother?"
Her anger is almost tangible. "I actually cannot believe you."
"I'm going for a walk."
"I'll come with??—"
"No," I cut her off sharply. "I need to be alone."
Her sneer is immediate. "Alone? Alone with that little??—"
I whirl around, voice dropping to a dangerous whisper. "Don't."
"What's your obsession with her?"
A bitter laugh escapes me. If only she knew.
"Go do a few more lines, Farrah."
"Fuck you. You're one to talk, asshole."
She's not wrong. But at least I'm honest about it.
I storm toward the beach, party noise fading into the rhythm of waves. In the distance, I spot Nora, her posture heavy with whatever weight she's carrying.
I freeze.
Let her go, Nate. She doesn't need you fucking up her life more than you already have.
I've repeated that a hundred times, yet I still can't walk away.
Then I see Connor following her, something predatory in his easy stride. My stomach turns.
I move without thinking, staying hidden but drawn forward by something I can't fight. Nora's voice drifts over, soft and placating, followed by Connor's darker tones and a laugh that chills my blood. I see them clearly now.
Nora tries to step back, but Connor's hand snakes around her waist, pulling her close. Her body goes rigid, panic in her eyes, then his lips press against hers.
I snap.
And all I see is red.