Chapter 20
J ade exited the elevator at Baptist Health Medical Center. When she called Logan yesterday, he’d been shocked that she was willing to talk to him. “What made you change your mind?” he’d asked as she fast walked to the car rental counter to arrange for another vehicle.
She didn’t know how to answer because she wasn’t sure.
She still wasn’t. Maybe it was the lady in the airport who had mentioned her peach cobbler regrets.
Or maybe it was because she was filled to the brim with shame and remorse over what she’d done to Sebastian and her own credibility.
Maybe it was because she was so tired of the past constantly hovering over her, no matter how much she tried to ignore it or lock it away.
She knew one thing for sure. I’m tired of being alone.
Logan apologized for not having a place for her to stay since he was still in the halfway house.
That was fine—she didn’t mind getting a hotel room.
She needed time and space to clear her head.
She still had to call Miles and then ask her supervisor for a few days off.
She’d planned to do that anyway when Sebastian had asked her to stay.
“Can we meet for coffee in the morning?”
“No.” He went quiet, then said. “I’m going to the hospital.”
“Are you okay? What happened? I’ll come see you right now—”
“It’s not me.” Another silence. “It’s Lydia.”
She balked at first, then surprised herself when she agreed to listen as Logan explained her mother’s situation. She had liver failure and needed a transplant. She’d been on the list for years and was almost to the top, but it looked like she wouldn’t make it.
“That’s why I wanted her to see you,” he said. “She doesn’t have much time left.”
Jade went numb. “Okay.”
“ Okay ?” he said, irritated. “She’s your mother—”
“I know!” Her voice cracked. How was she supposed to feel? Sad? Angry? Worried? She didn’t know. She had zero connection to this woman anymore.
“I can meet you around noon,” he said. “I wanted to make sure I talked to her doctor, and he usually rounds in the morning.”
“Why are you helping her?”
“She’s got no one else.”
His words hit her square in the chest. She was still thinking about them as she rounded the corner to the hall where Lydia’s room was located.
Two people were standing halfway down the hallway, speaking to each other in hushed tones.
She recognized Logan immediately, but not the tall, winsome black woman he was with.
She paused, her pulse hammering in her head. She told herself she was just here for Logan, that she had no intention of visiting Lydia. Jade wasn’t prepared to see her. She didn’t want to see her.
Logan looked up. He said something to the woman and hurried toward Jade. “You’re here,” he said, smiling a little but seemingly confused. “I thought we were meeting later.”
“I wanted to talk to you,” she said, coming up with an excuse that was only partly the whole truth.
He glanced over his shoulder. “The doctor isn’t here yet, but I can tell Tameka to text me when he shows up. There’s a waiting area on the other side of the hall—”
“How is she?” Jade’s eyes widened, stunned she’d asked the question and even more surprised that she needed to know.
He looked at her, somber now. “Not good. She’s got cirrhosis, and it’s causing a lot of swelling. They’re trying to get fluid off her.”
Jade nodded, still composed. “How long does she have?”
“Doctor’s not sure. If she doesn’t get a transplant, maybe a couple weeks?” Tears filled his eyes. “I hate this for her.”
She swallowed. “She did this to herself, Logan.”
“You know, if you’re going to dog her, just go.” He stormed off.
Her temples were pounding. Logan didn’t understand. He met Lydia when she was sober. He didn’t know her drunk and wasted, only caring about herself. She was probably faking all this for attention, playing on Logan’s sympathies—
Stop. Stop, stop, stop!
Jade whirled around and dashed away from the hall.
She saw a small private waiting area and ducked inside, grateful it was empty, and dropped onto one of the chairs, her head falling into her hands.
Lydia had faked a lot of things, particularly parenthood and sobriety, but she couldn’t fake liver failure.
The woman was dying, and instead of being empathetic, Jade attacked her.
How could she be so coldhearted? Oh, and a thief. She couldn’t forget she was that too.
A soft knock sounded on the door. Jade lifted her head and saw Logan. “Can I come in?”
She nodded.
He sat down next to her, leaning his elbows on his knees. They didn’t say anything for a long time. Jade didn’t mind. Her brother had a solid way about him. That was new, and much different from the volatile kid he’d been in the past. He seemed grounded. Like Sebastian.
“I’m sorry,” Logan said. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you.”
“Yes, you should have.” She leaned back in the chair, fiddling with the strap of her crossbody purse. “I was out of line.”
He sat up and faced her. “Yeah. But it’s understandable.”
Jade sighed. “Not to me.”
“When I first met Lydia in rehab, she took me under her wing. At the time we didn’t know our connection to you, but she watched out for me, encouraged me, made sure I was sticking with the program.”
Jade fought the stabbing envy. Lydia had been more of a mother to him than she was to her own daughter.
“After we found out who we were, she filled me in on some things.”
“I don’t want to hear her excuses—”
“Good, because she didn’t give any. She took responsibility for everything she’d done to you.”
Sure she did. “That’s called manipulation, Logan.”
“I know manipulation. I’m an expert at it. But I get it—you can’t trust her. Just like you can’t trust me. And I understand if you don’t want to see her. I’m just glad you’re talking to me now. We’re family, Jade. I don’t want to lose that again.”
Her eyes stung. Family. As a kid, she longed for a permanent one. As an adult, she tried to make a legal one with Logan. And the one biological family member she had—that she knew of anyway— was just down the hall, hanging on to life.
Logan stood. “I told Tameka I’d get her some coffee. She’s been amazing through all this.”
Jade managed to smile. “I take it she’s your girlfriend.”
He nodded. “We met at work about a month ago. She’s a cashier and is going to UALR to get her degree in education. She has to go to work at three, but she’s been here for me as much as she can.”
“Then you’d better make her the best cup of coffee she’s ever had.”
Logan grinned. “When do you go back to Clementine?”
She frowned, then remembered she hadn’t told him where she was when she called him from the airport. “I’m not. I’m heading to Atlanta, probably tonight.”
“Oh.” His smile dimmed. “What about Seb?”
Her heart pinched. “He’s... working.”
“Hopefully you two can get together soon. He’s a cool guy.” His smile was back. “After the doctor shows up, Tameka and I will take you out before you go. There’s a great restaurant out in the Promenade that does Mediterranean fusion. How’s that sound?”
“Sounds great. What’s a promenade?”
“Outdoor shopping center. A lot has changed since the last time you were here.” He left the room.
Jade stared at the picture of watercolor lilies on the opposite wall. She could be in Clementine right now, talking to Evelyn Margot, eating chicken tenders at the Clementine Diner, taking another drive in the country. Being with Sebastian.
She shook her head. She could do none of those things ever again. I did it to myself.
After a few more minutes, she got up. She had a few hours still before she, Logan, and Tameka went to lunch, and she tried to figure out what to do.
She could go back to the hotel and do some work.
There was always work to be done. Or she could go shopping.
Hit a café for a cappuccino. Take a drive.
Find a car wash, for sure. She definitely needed to decompress.
There were plenty of things she could do to fill the time.
She left and turned to go back to the elevator. She had taken three steps when she halted. Looked over her shoulder. Why couldn’t she leave?
Regrets. She had enough to last a lifetime.
Jade drew in a deep breath... and went to Lydia’s room.
* * *
Plink. Plink. Plink.
Seb stared at the slowly moving river and tossed another stone.
He had no idea how long he’d been here this morning.
He didn’t care either. After he left the Clementine Inn yesterday, he drove to his cabin, intending just to spend a few hours there and go back to work.
He had another column to write, since the July Fourth one he’d impulsively penned was too early to go to print.
Then there was the article about the fire, and he also needed to get things set up for Flora when she came in the next morning.
At least he didn’t have to search for the ledger anymore.
Plink. Plink. Plink.
But he didn’t go back to Clementine. He turned off his phone for the night, then turned it on again to text Evelyn Margot that he was taking a few days off and she would be in charge of The Times until he returned. He hit Send and turned the phone off again.
Normally, being at the cabin brought him peace, particularly when he was outside.
But all he felt was turmoil. He did take a stab at writing another chapter in his novel but managed to get out four words before hanging it up.
Yeah, he was moping. Big-time. And the best way to get out of a mopey mood was to dive back into work.
He probably could do just that if everything didn’t remind him of Jade and her duplicity.