Chapter 26
I took the next few days to really think about what I wanted out of my life. I was grateful to everyone for rallying around me after the incident, but I was ready to move on and I needed a few days to really hone in and think about what that looked like.
Originally, I thought I wanted to quit dancing and leave Downpour.
But, upon some more reflection, I came to the conclusion that I really loved dancing.
It had garnered me a confidence I wouldn't have acquired otherwise, and I didn't want to stop doing something that made me feel good simply because I didn't need to financially do the work anymore.
Which was how I'd found myself waiting in the backroom of Downpour during a Wednesday rush waiting for Evangeline. I had a three point plan to turn my life around into exactly what I wanted, and point one was discussing my new ideas with my boss.
I'd been waiting for around ten minutes before I finally saw Evangeline sauntering up to me and making her presence known.
I knew she'd been busy, Wednesdays were busy all day.
That's what happened when a day of the week had the nickname 'Hump Day'.
It was barely noon and the place was already packed as hell.
“Thanks for waiting, Thayer.” Evangeline finally said with a sigh, a lingering smirk stained to her lips. “You know how Wednesdays are.”
“I do.” I lightly chuckled. “I appreciate you making the time to talk to me.”
“Of course.” She gestured to the office door behind me. “Let's go inside and talk.”
Evangeline's office was small and compact with file cabinets and drawers containing items I thought were better left unknown.
But it was a quaint space, plenty big enough for her desk and chair on one side and two chairs on the other.
As she slipped by the desk to sit behind it, I took one of the offered chairs and took a seat.
Once she did the same, she gave me an even simper and cleared her throat.
“Firstly, I was so glad to get your call. I called and sent a couple messages but—”
“I know, I'm sorry.” I said, cutting her off. “It's just been a crazy week with everything and I'm sorry I never got back to you.”
“Totally understandable.” Evangeline nodded. “I’m glad to hear you're doing your best to move past everything.” She paused to scoff. “Those damn Rhodeses. Do they do anything that isn't laced in crime?”
“Do you know much about them?”
“Not much,” she offered. “But I've heard the rumors about them. Archie, the senator, isn't doing too hot. The whole family has been the subject of scandal since the sixties. From what I've been told, anyway.”
That made sense. If the Rhodes family was this bold and brash in this day and age, I could only imagine what they'd gotten into with less strict laws in place.
“But now that you're doing better,” She gave me a smile, folding her hands over themselves as her fingers laced a safe haven for her palms. “What did you want to discuss today?”
Taking in a chaste breath, I rolled my shoulders forward and regulated my body to prep the speech I’d been mulling over the entire ride to the club.
I’d done so much thinking about this particular interaction that I had no backup plan, so I was really hoping that Evangeline was open to what I had to suggest.
“After what happened with the Rhodes twins, I’ve taken the time I’ve been off work to really think about my life. About my future. Specifically what I wanted that to look like. And after several days of serious thinking, I’ve finally made a decision.”
Evangeline hitched a breath, lightly spreading her fingers over her chest. “You’re not quitting, are you?”
“Well, that depends.”
I watched curiosity curve her brow as she leaned back in her chair, eager to hear the rest of what I had to say. “On?”
“I love dancing,” I began, nodding to emphasize my point.
“But I’d be lying if I said I got into this line of work because it was something that I’d been seeking my entire life.
I took this job as a means to an end. I needed money and I needed it quick.
I’m thankful as hell that you saw something in me that I didn’t see in myself all those years ago. ”
“Thayer,—”
“Please, let me finish.” I said, gluing my hands together in a mock prayer before continuing to use them to highlight my speech.
“I was in a horrible financial situation and Downpour got me out of it. Along the way, I unlocked something new about myself. I realized that I really did love dancing. It became something so much much than a paycheck to me. I’ve recently come into some money, so I don’t need this job anymore.
I haven’t needed this job for a couple years now, but I keep coming in because I love to be seen in the way that only working here allows me to see myself. ”
Evangeline’s simple smile was all the greeted me, and I was grateful that she was showing me support for my words while also giving me the means to proceed.
“I love this job and I want to continue doing it, but on my terms. Going forward, I’d like to firstly reduce my hours.”
“Okay.” Evangeline nodded, hands clasped over one another as she leaned forward in her chair.
“Instead of leaving completely, I thought we could make my Cowboy Connor routine even more of a spectacle than it has already become. I was thinking coming in two days a week, doing my Cowboy Connor routine both nights, and I’d open myself up to any and all private sessions afterwards.
” I paused as I gauged her reaction, but I wasn’t able to garner anything from the neutral look gracing Evangeline’s features. “Is that…okay?”
She gave me another feeble smile. “Of course that’s okay!
” Relief washed over me as she rocked back in her chair again.
“I’m just thankful you’re not quitting. Do you know how many customers have been asking for you in your absence?
” I opened my mouth to explain myself, but Evangeline put up a hand.
“Nothing I can’t handle! You’re safety is more important than anything, Thayer.
I’m not mad that you weren’t here. Of course I’m grateful that you’re okay, I’m just letting you know that people are missing you, and not just the customers.
” She nodded. “When I took over this club from my father seven years ago, I never thought we’d gain enough popularity to have a consistent routine, let alone one that’s constantly requested.
” Her hand raced over her desk to lay on top of where my own resided, patting it twice in succession.
“You’re an important fixture around here, Thayer. ”
I didn’t know what to say. I wasn’t expecting Evangeline to get all sappy and sentimental on me.
Moreover, I wasn’t expecting for my emotions to be reacting to her sentiments this way.
Water wobbled in my eyes, tears begging to be born from the words my boss was brave enough to speak into existence.
Knowing that I was missed while I’d been recovering and soul searching made a warmness I couldn’t name flood my veins.
I gave Evangeline a nod and a shaky smile, her hand leaving mine as she tilted her head.
“I think making your Cowboy Connor routine more of an event like you were saying will be great for business,” It was almost comical watching emotional Evangeline turn into business Evangeline before my very eyes, like she was shedding into a second skin that she had available at any given moment.
If you looked closed enough, I swore you could see her rises suddenly resembling dollar signs.
“We can do themed drinks, decorations, the whole nine! Oh, this is good. Okay, what days were you thinking?”
I chuckled, loving her enthusiasm about a conversation I was so worried about having. “I was thinking maybe Tuesdays? I know those are slower than any other day, so I thought that might be a draw for business. And then I thought one night of the weekend, whatever you thought might be the best?”
“Well, that depends.” She said, reflecting my earlier words back on me. “Friday or Saturday nights would both do really well, so would you rather come in on Saturdays or do Fridays and have the entire weekend to yourself?”
Able to think about it in real time, I pondered the options she’d weighed before me.
While I was staying at Downpour because I loved doing it and the money was pretty good, I also loved the idea of being able to enjoy my weekends.
I could hang out with Bas more, since he had weekends off from the blood center.
And of course, I could spend more time with Qwill.
I could even give him some private dances at the apartment.
I had to ban the thought from the confines of my brain, because I was not about to get a boner in front of my boss.
“Tuesdays and Fridays it is, then.”
“Great!” Evangeline stood up and offered me a hand. I mirrored her and grab hold of her hand as we shook on it. “I’ll deal with all the paperwork and stuff and I’ll get to work on some promo stuff. Did you want to work this Friday or wait for next week?”
“No, let’s do it this Friday. I’m ready to get back on the stage.”
“And you’re positive about being down for the private sessions in the suites? I know you had some aversion to them before.”
“I’ve accepted that people are going to request private dances from me,” I admitted, and I had.
I’d thought about it a lot in the past few days and since I was cutting myself back to two days a week, I was confident that the private sessions would help make up for money lost. “I’m totally down to do it now. ”
“Fantastic! Because I’ve had a shit ton of offers way over asking price and we’re both missing out on some good money.”
Scoffing, I started laughing even though I was shaking my head at her.
Evangeline joined me in laughing. “I’m glad you’re back though, Thayer. Really.”
“Thanks, Evie. I really appreciate this.”
She gave me a single nod. “I’ll see you Friday.”
“I’ll see you then.”
Walking out of Evangeline’s office, I felt lighter, not having the weight of anxiety from having that conversation holding me down any longer.
I’d been able to get exactly what I wanted simply by asking for it, something I’d heard repeated to me time and time again when I’d been talking about my hangups in life whenever I went to group.
But the smile on my face as I rounded the corner of the backroom of the club made me so damn proud.
If felt like I was finally putting into practice some of the things I’d learned in group that I hadn’t had the opportunity to put into action just yet.
Ever since my life had been shaken up by the return of Troian and the arrival of Qwill, I felt like I’d been growing into the person I was always meant to become.
I felt a twinge of pride and pain thinking about how proud my parents would be of me if they could see me now.
Even so, I was proud of me. I’d accomplished so much in such a short amount of time.
I stepped outside onto the sidewalk beyond the doors of Downpour, taking in a pure breathe of the fresh air, feeling light and free in a way that felt like the feelings weren’t leaving me anytime soon.