Chapter 14
Another lapse of time later, I was being ushered out of the car with Van’s help as he led me inside the hotel. I couldn’t have relayed what place he’d chosen for me or where the hell we even were, but I was just happy that he hadn’t tricked me and taken me home.
Now that the constant flow of alcohol had been cut off from me, I was starting to feel a bit better. Was I still drunk? Of course. But I didn’t fear that another bout of time would pass me by without my acknowledgement.
The front lobby of the hotel was deserted, much to my surprised delight.
The late hour of the night probably didn’t hurt, but not having to worry about being swarmed by potential fans was always a win in my book.
Van sauntered up to the front desk and he started muttering about our reservation as I took in my surroundings.
I could see the name of the hotel throughout the place, finally seeing something instantly recognizable.
I’d stayed in this hotel chain many a time before so I felt some of the tension over not knowing where I was leave me in that moment.
Everything looked bright and crisp and clean.
I’d never really thought about it before, but there was something really peaceful about an empty hotel lobby in the middle of the night.
No one was screaming, no one was hurt. It was just the nice hum of nothingness to meet you, and you had no other choice but to accept it.
I wanted that, to thrive inside the nice hum of nothingness.
That’s what I’d been searching for the entire night Van and I had been out at the bar.
We’d had a great time, and I’d felt like I’d been able to let go and have a few laughs.
While our conversation hadn’t gotten too personal, I’d learned more about Van than I ever thought I would, so I considered that a plus.
And now, here he was, taking care of me. Making sure that I wasn’t inevitably making a fool of myself. Although whether or not I’d still managed to do so despite his best efforts had yet to be established.
Burying my crush for him for the millionth time, he gave the person manning the front desk a smile and grabbed our keycards and started leading us to the elevator.
I was still gripping on his arm like it was my lifeline.
Considering I’d convinced myself that if I let go, I would unravel at my expertly tied seams, it was.
Once inside the safety of the elevator, I resisted a sigh once the doors closed. I leaned against Van’s shoulder, my head lolling against the fabric of his suit. I yanked myself off of him as I heard a chuckle pass by his lips.
“What’s so funny?”
“Nothing.” He simpered, looking down at me with that annoyingly handsome face and that well-timed grin.
“Why aren’t you more drunk?” I said, suddenly annoyed that he wasn’t struggling as much as me.
“Oh, I am.” He chuckled, suppressing a burp as he made a fist and lightly rapped on his chest with the arm I wasn’t smothering. “But we need one of us to keep it together long enough for us to get to our rooms.”
That was fair, but it didn’t pull the annoyance away. A loud ding told us that we’d arrived at our designated floor, and I was still on Van’s arm as he led us out of the elevator and down the hallway to where I presumed the room was.
Heat flushed throughout my body as I kept walking with him. Had he gotten us separate rooms or was there not enough time? I hadn’t given him my card or anything, he’d just taken over booking the hotel at my immediate request. What if he’d gotten us one room?
I couldn’t tell if my body being covered in the rolls of warmth were because I hoped he hadn’t gotten us separate rooms or because I hoped he had.
As much as I was vying for his attention in that way, I knew it was impossible.
Van and I couldn’t happen. Wouldn’t happen.
I was the one signing his checks, it was completely wrong for me to entangle myself with someone who’s cost of living I was paying for.
That didn’t stop it from being the hottest thought I’d ever had though.
God, what was wrong with me? This was the issue with drinking.
It made you think in more of a jagged way than you normally did.
Van was hot and that was a fact. I’d been able to keep my thoughts at bay for this long now.
However, with the help of alcohol, and the fact that we were alone in a hotel, that line I’d been keeping myself from crossing was beginning to blur.
Van led us to a single door, room number 515, and I unfurled from his side for the first time since we’d left the bar. I needed to get my shit together and that started with not hanging off of Van while I was having thoughts of him in-between my sheets.
Fuck, don’t think about him being in your sheets, Alistair.
“Are you okay?” His question cut through the reverie of my mind, making me feel a quick bolt of sobriety.
Smoothing my hands over my clothes, I gave him a nod. “Yeah, I’m fine, sorry. I didn’t mean to be leaning on you so much.”
“It’s okay.” The rumble of Van’s light laugh warmed my skin further. God, I loved that sound. “I don’t mind.”
He didn’t mind? What did that mean? Was my libation soaked brain reading way too much into that response or was Van…giving me some sort of insight into the possibility of him reciprocating the attraction I so obviously held for him?
It’s just the drinks, Alistair. I had to tell myself that for fear of believing the opposite. There was a danger in believing that and I needed to go the fuck to sleep so that I didn’t cross that damn line.
Van swiped the card along the inner workings of the door’s reader.
I decided that following suit wouldn’t look too suspicious while I got my thoughts together and fortified them.
The room was pretty typical. There was a decent bathroom off to the left after walking in, which led to a more open area with a microwave and a desk with a chair just beyond it.
To the side of the room was a couch, one that was nearer to the closet that was way too small and next to the desk.
A dresser was underneath the sizable television that was housed there.
Of course, the big draw of the room was the king-sized bed that just begged to be slept in.
My heart couldn’t help but race at the implication. Was the king-sized bed a clear indication that Van had decided that one room was enough for us? Palpitations at the thought rattled my chest, convinced that I was able to hear my heartbeat from where it was pumping within my ribs.
A groan left my lips when I walked by the bed.
It really did just have the most inviting nature and I wanted to jump right into it.
Van was setting down the card to the room on the dresser, which gave me enough room to somersault myself onto the bed.
It was more than prepared for my assault, the comfort of the bed swallowing me as I laid face down on the amazing clouds the bed seemed to be made of.
Where the hell had Van gotten this hotel, paradise? It was absolutely perfect.
“Comfortable, I take it?”
I stopped more moans from slipping out of my mouth, rolling over to see Van’s smirk. “Ugh, it’s amazing.”
“Well, good.” He sat down on the corner of the bed, giving me enough space that we weren’t touching. There it was again, that thought that I was both relieved and deprived. “Do you need anything else?”
Yeah, you, naked. Okay, he needed to go if my thoughts were going to refuse to be contained.
After clearing my throat, I said, “I’m good.
Thanks again. Not just for getting our drunk asses here to the hotel, but for everything.
” I gave him my warmest smile, hoping it was as genuine looking as it felt.
“I really appreciated being able to just exist tonight. Thanks for being by my side during that.”
“Of course. I had a great time.” He assured me, unable to tear his eyes away from mine. This intense eye contact wasn’t doing well for my immense feelings of wishing he was naked in this bed with me. “Well, I booked myself the room right next to yours, so if you need anything, I’m right next door.”
Well, there went the idea that we’d have to share the bed. Total boner killer.
“Right.” I said, unable to keep the disappointment from showing through my voice. He was about to lift off the bed, judging by his sudden movement, but I reached out and grabbed his hand, halting his leave from the bed. “Wait.”
He stared down at where our hands connected, the heat radiating from his grip to mine. I wanted more skin contact, fucking craved it. As much as I wanted to deny that I could keep things professional between us, the truth was I didn’t fucking want to.
When his eyes lifted off of our hands and he found my eyes, I saw such a softness in them that I wanted to melt. Hell, I was already melting. Why was it so hot in here all of the sudden? Oh, right, he was touching me and igniting me from the inside out.
“Alistair,” Van sort of growled my name then, like he had when we’d been outside the bar arguing about me going home. This time, it felt more like a warning that it had back when he’d said it on the sidewalk.
“Van,” I mimicked, needing to hear his name in my mouth.
The look he was giving me wasn’t instantly readable, but I could feel the intensity in his gorgeous eyes that made my skin prickle at being perceived.
“I know we have a working relationship, and I’m not trying to diminish that. You’ve been really great and I—”
Never would I get the chance to finish my sentence, because in that moment, Van cut through the very feeble space separating us and pressed his lips to mine so swiftly that I thought I had imagined it.
I allowed the shock to absorb into my body for exactly five seconds before I closed my eyes and savored the kiss.
It was a peck, really, but already my body was responding.
My dick was swelling up fast as fuck, tightening my pants and making me glad that Van couldn’t feel my arousal.
With a sickening sound, Van ripped his lips from me, staring back at me with a look of bewilderment. He honestly looked just as shocked as I had been initially.
For a moment, we just started at one another.
Our breathing was the only sound filling the room, and both of our chests were rising and falling with evident strain from our quick kiss.
I didn’t want to completely throw myself at him.
We’d both been drinking, but the yearning I had for our skin to meld together was warping my brain.
The only thing I wanted was more more more.
“Alistair, I’m so sorry.” He said, washing his palm over his face, momentarily obscuring those beautiful blue, almost purple, eyes from me. “I wasn’t thinking.”
I scooted closer to him, so that my knees were touching his leg. I delighted in the sight that was his obvious arousal, jutting out from its trapped placement in his slacks. I locked eyes with him again and started to shake my head in protest.
“No.” I told him, grabbing both sides of his face, allowing my fingers to tease the follicles of his recently shaven jaw. “No more thinking.”
And then I pressed my lips against him hard. So hard I thought both of us might break. But once I felt his arms wrapping around me, pulling me into his lap like I belonged there, I knew there was no going back now.
The line between us wasn’t just blurred anymore. It was completely destroyed.