Epilogue
Three Months Later
Roars of excitement and gratitude bellowed around me, keeping me inside a cocoon of bewilderment.
As I stared out into the crowd, feeling every ounce of energy that they were giving me, I’d never felt more proud of this tour.
Even though tonight was the final show and everything was coming to an end, somehow it felt like more of a beginning.
Normally, if I was going to change something or announce something during the show, I usually did it during the acoustic set, but I’d decided to switch things up this time.
I’d just finished performing My Favorite Boy, the third song on the setlist. Every night, right about now I would be giving thanks to the audience before going on to the first outfit change of the show.
Instead, I walked toward the end of the stage.
There was a slight ruckus in the crowd, murmuring multiplying as those who had seen the show before or had experienced it online, knew that this wasn’t a normal segue to how the show usually went down.
My lips upturned as I made my way to the end of the stage, like I normally would do during the acoustic set, still gripping the purple microphone I’d been using moments before I’d set my plan into motion.
Holding the microphone to my face once again, I stopped walking as soon as I was standing at the end of the stage, my excitement bubbling underneath the rhinestone remnants of the pirate-inspired outfit I was wearing.
“Wow,” I scoffed into the mic, adding an even giggle as the crowd hushed themselves to appropriately take in my speech. “You are giving me so much energy tonight, Tokyo.”
Ear-splitting sounds emitted from the crowd, as it usually did whenever I addressed them by the city or state we were in. I waited for the noise to die down before I began talking again.
“As you know, tonight is the final show of The Cutting Diamonds Tour, and I couldn’t have made such a long-lasting and amazing show without you guys being here and giving me all the love, attention, and time that you’ve given me during this tour.
So thank you so much for that.” They applauded and yelled some more.
“In honor of that, I’ve been keeping a little secret to myself for a bit.
” That one statement caused an entire murmured hush to befall the crowd.
I was even able to see the people closest to the stage turning to their friends in excitement and panic as they waited for me to finish my decree.
“Because you guys have been so amazing tonight and because it’s the final show, I have an announcement to make.
But rather than just standing here and talking your ear off, I figured I’d just show you. ”
I gestured my hand behind me, toward the massive big screen, just like I had done when I’d announced the deluxe version of The Pressure To Cut Diamonds during the second North Carolina show.
I watched as the screen transformed into showing an album cover and the text that showed the title of said album.
On the cover was yours truly, stepping out of the trunk of a tree that was entirely made of metal, with the look of shock on my face as I made my way out of the tree trunk, wearing a shiny purple outfit that was very reminiscent of a sailor’s uniform.
Of course, it was covered in rhinestones of differing shades of purple to catch the light just right.
Surrounding me was a darkly lit forest of similar trees, all of the forest being made of seemingly silver metal, their branches sharp and devoid of leaves.
It was giving a very creepy, very Tim Burton atmosphere, and I fucking loved it.
Adoring the forest floor, were countless purple flowers, all varying in species and color.
The text above the album cover said Kismet Through The Darkness, and the crowd was absolutely losing their minds. I could see the looks on the faces of those closest to me in the pit, and it looked like they had pieced the news together, but were waiting on me to confirm their suspicions.
Laughing, I decided to put them out of their misery. “I know it hasn’t even been a year since Diamonds came out, but I’ve been incredibly inspired lately. So, because of that, my brand new album, Kismet Through The Darkness, is coming out October twenty-second!”
The uproar to end all sound met me then, and I could practically feel the excitement oozing off the crowd like some sort of tangible perfume, just dying to take hold of me.
Looking out into the endless sea of fans, my face hurt from smiling.
I’d been so creatively fueled these past couple months that I simply couldn’t stop writing.
And before I’d known it, I had an entire album in my hands.
It hadn’t even been that long since I’d released the Sorry I Didn’t Call music video but right after, I couldn’t stop writing about how in love I was, how I’d survived what I’d gone through during tour.
Though Blue had, just like Van had implied, been to my new home in Phoebe to help me create the sound of the album, we’d also been sending files back and forth, thanks to the stability of the internet.
I couldn’t believe I’d made a new album, shot an album cover, and filmed a new music video all in the span of the past three months.
I didn’t know if it was the magic of being back in Phoebe, being in my new house, or officially being a couple with Van that had made me so fulfilled. Regardless, I was ridiculously happy.
And I really was. So full of happiness that I thought I wasn’t going to survive it.
Van had very easily moved in with me after he’d been at the house so much that first month that it just made sense to have him there.
We were finding a balance between being co-workers and boyfriends, and really, there hadn’t been a downside to it.
I was determined to fight through it if one did rear its ugly head because, well, I was hopelessly in love with my Vanguard.
Being in love wasn’t something new to me, but being in love like I was with Van was new territory.
While we hadn’t publicly acknowledged what was happening between us to society, everyone in our lives that needed to know, did.
With the album coming out though, the fans were definitely going to find out.
And we’d made the decision to proclaim it officially after I’d made the album announcement.
I was nervous about how people would react about the news of me dating my security guard, but Van had calmed me down so many times about it that I felt that, no matter what, things would be a-okay.
That was the thing about Van. He didn’t stress things that he couldn’t control.
He gave me the freedom to be myself that I hadn’t experienced before.
Maybe it was because he worked within the industry but wasn’t influenced by it that made all the difference, or at least, the difference of what it had been like to be with a famous actor.
Whatever the reason, I just felt more myself when I was with Van.
He brought out a playfulness in me, breaking down the walls of seriousness that I’d built up for so many years of trying to make it in the music industry.
With Van, none of that mattered. I could just be Alistair, once and for all.
“Thank you guys so much for the never-ending support,” I said loudly over the still-cheering crowd. “I can’t wait for you guys to hear Darkness when it comes out in a few months. Anyway, back to your regularly scheduled show. Thank you!”
As I found the mark that indicated the lift, I waved to the crowd as they began to chant my name. Laughing it off, I kept waving as the lift lowered me down into the lower parts of the stage and ran off to get dressed into my next outfit.
Just as I was buttoning up my next outfit, I caught the hint of purple eyes out of the corner of my eye, looking up in time to see Van’s smiling face.
He paused in front of me, revealing his hands from the pockets of his black slacks.
He’d finally switched his usual black nail polish for a dark purple this time, matching that color I’d said represented not only my view of him, but the color of my upcoming album as well.
After all, he was a huge inspiration between the subject matter of most of the songs.
“You did great, babe.” He told me, waiting until I’d gotten my final button closed before reaching for my hand. Without hesitation, I took his hand in mine and grinned like the idiot in love that I was. “They lost their minds, just like you predicted.”
“I know.” I chuckled, shaking my head. Sometimes it was hard to believe that this was my life and I was as happy as I was.
Being with Van was making me learn to accept that I deserved to be this happy, and to revel in it.
So I rolled my shoulders and squeezed his hand.
“We’ll hard launch our relationship on socials later this week. ”
“Hard launch?” Van’s eyebrows displayed his obvious confusion as they dipped lower on his face. “I’m not familiar with what that means, but anything with you and hard involved is something I’m interested in.” He shifted his eyebrows as they wagged at me knowingly.
“God, you’re so horny during shows.” I said, swatting him but unable to keep my laughter at bay. “It just means we’ll be telling the world about us being official.”
His hand found mine again, the warmth and safety of his palm radiating heat throughout my entire body.
Van’s purple eyes met me again, and in them, I saw home.
“Sounds wonderful.” He lifted the back of my hand and placed a chaste kiss directly in the center.
The grin that followed made its way into his eyes as he added, “I love you, Alistair.”
My heart shook with feeling, allowing that sentiment to absorb into my soul as I used our conjoined hands to pull him forward so that our lips could return to their rightful place alongside each other.
I broke the kiss way earlier than I would have preferred, but I did need to make my way back on stage soon.
Looking up into Van’s disguised eyes, knowing the purple that was hidden there underneath his skilled illusion, I stared at the man I loved and pulled our joined hands to rest against my chest, intertwined fingers that nestled against the rattled heartbeat residing there. “I love you too, Vanguard.”
Per usual when I muttered his full name, Van swept me into another embrace and kissed me hard, making me feel like the only thing that existed in the world was his touch, his kiss, his tongue.
And for brief moment, I let that be all there was expected of me.
I savored his kiss, our tongues delicately sliding together, and gripping his suit and wishing that everyone could find what made them happy, just like I had.
Because for me? Vanguard was the latest addition to my happy.
I’d had music before, but to have love on top of it?
Nothing could top that. And with him, walking hand in hand together through life, I had every intention of spending the rest of my life letting him know how ecstatic I was to have him by my side for as long as he would have me. My metal chimera man.