10. Theo
TEN
THEO
THE EXAM
Day 394
Watching her hustle about her exam room, I find I can’t take my eyes off of her. She’s stunning. Her hair is long and curly, haloing her face and accentuating her cheekbones, which are dusted with freckles. Those freckles were the first thing I noticed about her, and I couldn’t stop my hands as they instinctively reached for my face, my movements beyond control as I got lost in their mesmerizing pattern. But there’s something sad about her, something I couldn’t help but notice in those deep green eyes of hers. I know it’s the end of the world, and we don’t run into very many women, but I know I’ve never seen anyone in my life as beautiful as her.
Finally, shifting my focus to the room we’re in, I’m impressed with the setup. I tried sneaking a peek when Kenji was carrying me in, but everything was upside down. I honestly felt like I was seconds away from passing out, lightheaded from my position and the ache in my leg. From what I could see, it looked like she was bringing us into a house, and now that I’m upright and no longer hanging off of Kenji, I can see that I was correct. The makeshift exam room looks to be in an old office, given the shelves lining one of the walls, the big desk in the corner, and the small futon that I’ve been relegated to. I can’t help but wonder how they were able to get all this medical equipment I can see around me. How long did it take?
I try to build up the courage to ask her for her name, but I can’t help the anxiety about what her reaction might be when she discovers I’m Deaf. My past experiences have taught me that not everyone is understanding of me. They think we’re lying about me being Deaf, that it’s only a ruse to be able to sneak in and steal their belongings. In the times when we’ve been somewhere, and people believed us, they were frustrated, questioning how the hell we could pull our own and help out, or even do anything if I couldn’t do the most basic thing: hear.
Will my inability to hear always make things more difficult for Kenji, Adrian, and me? Will it ever be okay?
Kenji and Adrian have never once made me feel inferior or inadequate because of my Deafness. In fact, they have always stood by me, fiercely opposing anyone who dared to suggest otherwise. Over the years, whenever some ignorant person has made some sort of comment, they've been quick to remind me of my strengths—that I am witty, well-educated, and bilingual in both American Sign Language and English, which is more than most of those people can say for themselves.
I am fully aware that my Deafness doesn’t diminish my worth, and I know my brothers share this belief wholeheartedly. Yet, despite their unwavering support, despite what I know is the truth, anxiety still finds a way to creep in during moments like these.
Deep breath in. Hold for three. Deep breath out.
Okay, well, she’s going to figure it out eventually, right? And probably soon because she’s about to try and treat my leg and I won’t be able to hear a single instruction she gives me, and I may not be able to accurately read her lips the whole time.
I turn my head and face Adrian. “ What’s her name? ”
Adrian’s dominant hand opens, thumb pointing at his chin while the other fingers extend upward. He then rolls his fingers in front of his face, closing them back towards his thumb as they end near his chin, completing the sign for 'Beautiful.'
I roll my eyes. Okay, so he’s clearly no help because that’s definitely not her name. I look at Kenji and wave, trying to get his attention, but his eyes are only focused on her. He’s circling her like she’s prey, watching every movement as though she was about to pull out a knife and stab me with it. It seemed pretty clear from our stakeout near that fence that she’s more likely to stab Kenji.
I don’t manage to snag Kenji’s attention, but I do get hers.
She’s looking at me as though she understands, and her whole face softens as she takes me in. Her eyes then dart to Adrian, who still has hearts in his eyes. His entire face lights up as she directs her attention at him. “He’s Deaf, right?”
I want to answer yes, to tell her that I can read her lips. But I can’t physically do it, so I turn to Adrian as my mouthpiece.
“Yes, he is,” Adrian nods, looking like he just released a big breath. As he continues to speak, his hands move along, communicating what’s being said to me. “He was asking what your star sign is. I’m a Leo, in case you were curious. Theo’s a Pisces, and Kenji is so obviously a Scorpio.”
Her head jerks back, confused.
“Your name,” Kenji signs along with his words before moving to jab Adrian in the side with his elbow. “Theo is asking for your name.”
She looks over at me instead of looking at Adrian or Kenji, and I feel seen. Most people just focus on my brothers and not me since it’s too difficult in their minds to deal with me. She seems to contemplate something, then nods and turns around to grab a clipboard.
Who has a clipboard during an apocalypse?
She writes something on the paper, tears it off, and hands it to me. I look up at her, and she nods her head down towards the paper, encouraging me to look down and read it.
Farron.
My breath leaves my body. It’s beautiful, just like she is.
I look up at the guys, fingerspelling her name for them before shaking my head, then signing the word ‘freckles’ again, making it clear to them what I want her name sign to be. Adrian looks like he’s about to get on one knee, while Kenji is suddenly very interested in his shoes and won’t lift his gaze. I look back at her and see her writing again on that clipboard of hers. When she’s done, she hands me the whole clipboard instead of tearing off another scrap of paper.
“I’m going to start on your leg. I’ll ask those two to help sign along to what I say. It looks like you can read lips but my head will be down. If anything hurts too bad and you need to stop, or you just need my attention, squeeze my arm.”
I look back up at her and nod, handing her back the clipboard. Then, I watch as she turns to Adrian and Kenji to relay the same information she just told me.
I pause.
Farron told me first before telling them, even if she had to write it down to help me.
“Now, which of you two dumbasses decided it was a good idea to carry him with the bear trap still on his leg?” She questions, her hands on her hips. Adrian is standing behind her, still in my line of vision, and I can see that he’s signing everything she’s saying, but I’m not focused on him. All I can focus on is Farron and her presence. I’d also much rather focus on her lips than Adrian’s hands, though my eyes do occasionally snap that way, just to make sure I don’t miss anything.
I see Kenji grind his jaw and close his hands into fists. “We tried to pull it open to get his leg out, but it wouldn’t budge. No matter how hard we pulled or how many times. We figured it was more important to get here and potentially get help than keep trying.”
Farron responds in laughter. God, I wish I could hear that laugh. “You couldn’t get it open,” she says and shakes her head before quickly sobering up and turning to address me directly. “So, there’s good news and bad news. The good news is you stepped in one of the newer traps without teeth, so I don’t anticipate any broken bones. The bad news is that the rubber came off on this one, so it’s cut into your leg a bit. More good news for you is that it’s not too deep, so I’m hopeful that stitches should be enough.”
She walks over to me, Adrian following behind her, and continues speaking. My eyes continue to toggle between her and Adrian, trying to ensure that I can get all the information she’s communicating to me. “I’m going to open this trap to get it off your leg, Theo. It’s probably going to hurt, but I’m going to rush to disinfect and get it patched up, okay? I’ll be working fast so it doesn’t bleed too much. Remember to squeeze if you need to.”
I nod at her and give her an encouraging smile. Well, I at least try to.
She focuses back down on my leg and the bear trap it’s stuck in. She places her hands on what looks to be two springs on either side of the trap and pushes down on both at the same time. I see the trap open, releasing my leg. She shoots a smirk at Adrian and Kenji, shaking her head like they’re idiots for not figuring it out on their own.
All of the pressure immediately disappears, and I don’t feel any immediate increase in pain. She inspects the gash more closely now that the trap is off, her fingers gentle but firm as they probe the wound. Her fingers brush against my ankle inadvertently, sending a jolt of pain through me, and I let out a low groan. Her eyes snap up to mine immediately; concern etched into her features. “Your ankle looks swollen, Theo. Did you twist it when you fell?”
I nod, feeling a flush of embarrassment creeping up my neck. As if stepping into the trap wasn’t humiliating enough, now I have to admit to a clumsy fall. She tilts her head slightly, studying my reaction, before returning her attention to the injury.
“That’s going to mean crutches,” she says with sympathy in her tone. I simply shrug, trying to maintain a semblance of dignity despite the situation. The thought of hobbling around on crutches isn’t appealing, but at least it’s better than being stuck immobile.
I watch as she gets up and walks away from me, looking through a few bottles on one of the shelves. Farron grabs some sort of liquid, I’m assuming to pour over and disinfect my leg. The second it touches me, I’m hit with blinding pain. Pain that’s even worse than when I first got stuck in the trap. And before I know it, everything goes dark.