Chapter 40
Together, Maren and I approached the withering flower that held my life, and Eroth’s, in the balance.
The final petal wavered by a single thread beneath the dome of glass.
If I was going to break the curse, the moment was now.
The choice should have been simple: either let Nico, Eroth, and myself perish, or speak my true feelings, the ones burning on my tongue to be said, and say goodbye to Maren forever.
It was a fate I hadn’t allowed myself to think about, since I never believed it would actually come to this. When I first brought her here, I never imagined a day where I wouldn’t want her gone. She was annoying and insufferable.
But then, by some twisted stroke of fate, I started to fall for her.
And now the thought of losing her, of never seeing her smile or hearing her laugh again, pierced straight through my stone-cold heart.
It was Maren or my kingdom.
It should have been an easy choice, but it wasn’t.
Either way, I would lose Maren. If I chose my kingdom, that meant she would share Eroth’s fate, and I couldn’t accept a world where she didn’t exist. If I chose her, then the queens’ magic would eventually claim her life too.
I had to trust that Nico would find a way to either send her home before that happened, or that he would go to the queens himself. He was smart, and I knew he cared for Maren. He would do whatever it took to keep her alive.
That was all that mattered.
The world needed her light, even if I didn’t get to live with it.
It was a funny thing: wanting one thing for centuries—to be free—and yet when the time came for it to come to pass, I found myself wishing there was another way.
A way I could stay like this and keep Maren while still saving Eroth from the depths of the Scorching Rivers.
Moons, I never thought I’d think such a thought.
Maren turned to me, putting her hands on the back of my neck, pulling my forehead to hers.
“It’s okay,” she whispered. I waited for her to say more, unable to get any words past the lump in my throat. “It’s okay if you don’t love me.”
The words fractured something deep inside that I didn’t know existed.
Her gray eyes pierced through my soul as she tilted her head to look at me, resignation shining in them. It stole the breath from my chest. No, don’t give up on me, I wanted to say.
“I can die knowing I tried my best to free you, to save Eroth,” she went on. “I never expected to fall for you, but I did. I’m sorry that it wasn’t enough to save you in the end.” A single tear slipped down her cheek. “It’s okay,” she repeated.
Come on, Rhydian. Say something! Don’t let her die like this. Don’t lose her having never told her how you feel!
I swallowed, tongue heavy in my mouth. How did anyone do this? How had she had the strength to look death in the face and still say those three words?
My hands clenched into fists at her back. Say it, you coward. I wanted to scream at the force keeping my lips together.
“But…I…do.” It took every bit of strength to push the words past my lips.
Maren leaned back to fully look me in the eye, brows flying up her forehead.
“I do…love you.” Barely a whisper, barely even out in the world.
“Rhydian…” Nico’s warning was quiet but laced with panic.
The flaming petal was shuttering, swinging precariously, a breath away from falling.
The decision made itself in that moment, the words flooding to my tongue, freed at last.
I faced Maren, taking her hands in mine. A flutter flitted through my stomach, and I was surprised I was capable of feeling such a thing.
Her eyes drew me in, and despite the fear shining in them, I could see how she felt about me too. It was more than I deserved. Moons, I didn’t deserve her love at all. I never had.
Once I was freed, Maren would never love me again.
In fact, I was certain she would despise me.
The thought ripped my heart to pieces. I despised that this was my fate. My eyes combed over every part of her face, memorizing each inch for as long as I was able to remember them.
I brought her hands to my lips, pressing a kiss to them, committing the feel of her skin to memory. At least I had this final moment. It wasn’t long enough, but it was worth it.
Holding her hands between mine, I tucked them into my chest.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the petal fall.
Time slowed.
“I love you, Maren.”
The petal hit the stone table.
A boom shuddered out.
And everything went black.