Chapter 1 #2
Besides, what was a little lavender marriage between friends?
It wasn’t hurting anyone. I genuinely cared for Greg. Sure, it wasn’t the obsessive, heart-achingly passionate love my older sisters had found, but so what? I didn’t need that.
I told myself that a steady partnership and a shared streaming platform were mature. Responsible. The way my chest ached thinking about my sisters slow dancing in their kitchens was just indigestion.
“You look hot.” Greg smirked at me, a giddy laugh bubbling up his throat.
Compliments from Greg always landed like they were aimed at the version of me he needed me to be—polished, presentable, believable. A small, pathetic part of me still wanted someone to look at me and mean it like I was the only thing in the room worth staring at.
“Thank you.” I blushed and dipped into a curtsy. “Though, I’m not going to lie. I hate this dress.”
It was like wearing someone else’s story. Someone quieter. Smaller. Someone who didn’t mind shrinking herself to fit into lace her future mother-in-law approved of.
“You made Mom very happy. She thinks you look like she did on her wedding day, which—let’s face it—you’re twenty times prettier, and she hates that.” Greg’s leg was shaking with nerves as his words tumbled out.
“What is with you?” My eyes narrowed. “You’re being weird.” A prickle crawled up the back of my neck. My gut was trying to warn me of something, I just didn’t know yet if it was about him . . . or me.
He stood to his full height, dragging a palm down his tuxedo pants. His palms went out. “Okay, so don’t be mad.”
I knew that face. My heart lurched. “What did you do?”
His expression twisted into a pout. “Nothing.”
I pointed a finger toward him. “Don’t nothing me. I know that look. You’re about to tell me something I don’t want to hear. Is the preacher drunk again?”
His lips rolled in like he was desperately trying to keep a serious face. “I told them.”
I blinked, my mind not keeping up with what he was saying. “Told them? Told who what?”
Greg looked at me and rolled his eyes. “Well . . . my parents. About me. Us. That I’m not exactly, you know, straight as an arrow.” He flattened his palm to emphasize his point.
“You came out to them? Today?” I couldn’t believe it. A war of emotions rioted in my chest. This was huge—monumental, in fact. Greg had always told me that his parents would never accept him and that he felt safest keeping this part of himself a secret from them.
Pride swelled first—my ridiculous, brave friend finally saying the words out loud. Fear followed close behind, whispering, Okay, but where does that leave you, idiot?
“Wait a minute . . . so what does that mean? For us? For today?” I gestured down at my dress.
Greg folded his hands to calm his own nerves. “That’s why I needed to talk to you right away.”
“The wedding is off, isn’t it?” Dread, thick as sludge, pooled in my gut. “You don’t need me to pretend to be your wife, so the wedding doesn’t need to happen?” My mind flew to the dozens of people waiting for me to walk down the aisle.
What the hell was I supposed to tell my family?
Greg’s mouth curved into a sheepish grin. “That’s the best part. My parents understand. Turns out they don’t really care and only want to see me happy. Isn’t that great?”
It was. It really, really was. I’d spent years imagining this exact scenario for him, begging the universe to soften his parents’ hearts. I just hadn’t pictured it happening on the one day where my entire life was balanced on the lie we’d sold them.
I shook my head. “Yeah, I mean . . . of course, but—”
“Slow down.” A throb pierced behind my left eye, and I pinched it closed.
Greg exhaled, clearly irritated that I wasn’t jumping for joy at his plan. “Look . . . Chris is already in a tux so . . . we are going to get married. You can be my best man!” Greg’s smile wobbled as my brain short-circuited.
“Chris from the Tipsy Tiger? The bar hookup you said had zero personality but the dick was a ten?”
“I said that?” Greg’s shotgun laugh startled me. “Well, we’ve been together for a while now.”
I swear I could hear the dial-up internet noise from the early 2000s as I tried to process the visual of me standing at the altar in a wedding gown while my fake fiancé married his very real boyfriend.
“What the hell, Greg!” He had always been a little reckless and wild, so it wasn’t that I was shocked by his behavior.
I was just . . . shocked. “You expect me to go out there in a wedding dress in front of my whole family and not get married while you marry your boyfriend and just expect that no one’s going to notice? ”
Greg pouted and crossed his arms. “I thought you’d be happy.”
My ears started to ring as my mind raced. “I’ve lied to my parents. My sisters. It was a miracle to get my brother Hayes in a suit. I haven’t been home in a year!”
The Star Harbor gossip grapevine would have a field day with this. My brother would go full overprotective caveman. My sisters would worry. My parents would quietly die inside. And I would be the girl who showed up in a wedding dress and left without a husband.
Greg’s palms rose. “Hey, that was your choice. You’re the one who didn’t think you could play it cool in front of your family.”
My armpits started sweating as I paced in the bridal suite. “This is unbelievable. What about a marriage license? It wouldn’t even be legal.”
Greg’s shoulders bounced. “We’ll have the party today—that’s the important part—and figure out the details later.”
I shook my head. “Greg . . . I can’t, I—”
Greg’s features hardened. “You had no problems using me for my money. I’m not asking for much here.”
His words landed like a slap. I’d spent months bending myself into the shape of the perfect fiancée for him, for his parents, for the shareholders who’d never even meet me—and somehow I was still the one taking advantage.
Anger bubbled to the surface at his accusation. “Used you? You said you wanted to help me start the business. It was your idea to get married in the first place!”
Greg leaned forward and lowered his voice. “Will you please calm down? You’re making a scene.”
There it was. The old familiar verdict. Too loud. Too emotional. Too dramatic. I’d heard versions of it my whole life. I just never thought I’d get it while standing in a wedding dress that wasn’t even meant for me.
Anger morphed into fury. “Calm down? Calm down? Do you have any idea how mortifying this is to me? How this looks?”
“You really are being dramatic about this whole thing.” The boredom in Greg’s voice sent me into a tailspin.
“Clara? Are you almost ready?” My little sister Kit’s voice was muffled through the door.
Oh, I’m being dramatic? I’ll show him what being dramatic really looks like.
I set my shoulders and whipped open the door. Kit’s auburn hair floated with the gust of air, and her eyes went wide as they flicked from me to Greg.
Relief punched through me so hard my knees wobbled. If there was anyone on earth who wouldn’t ask questions before helping me burn my life to the ground, it was my baby sister.
“Do you have your car?” I blurted without thinking.
Her mouth popped open, then snapped shut, mischief immediately sparking in her eyes. “Yes.”
“Can you get me out of here?” I didn’t have time to explain and knew Kit wouldn’t ask questions.
All I could think to do was run.
Maybe it was cowardly. Maybe it was selfish. But for the first time in a long time, I wanted to choose me instead of the version of me that made everyone else comfortable.
“You bet.” My little sister reached forward and grabbed my arm, pulling me past her.
She looked right at Greg. “I don’t know what you did to fuck this up, but you’re an idiot.
” She looped her arm in mine and dragged me down the corridor before turning back.
“Oh, and Clara told me about that weird thing with your . . . you know.” Her eyes moved from Greg’s face to his pants and back up again.
An unhinged cackle escaped me—Kit had definitely just made that insult up on the fly.
We bolted down the hallway and pushed open the exit door.
Sunlight spilled over my shoulders as the bite of cold air slapped me back.
The train of my dress whipped around my legs, beads biting into my skin as I stumbled into the snow.
My teeth chattered, adrenaline buzzing so loud in my ears I could barely hear the muffled music starting somewhere inside.
“Shit!” I couldn’t stop laughing. It was uncontrollable now. “What did I just do?”
Kit grabbed my arm and tugged me closer to ward off the wind. “You set yourself free, babe. Let’s get the fuck out of here before my tits freeze off.”
I hugged her closer and we ran, our laughter shaking the snow from the trees.