Chapter 40
Michael
“You’re a baby whisperer,” Carson says with awe in his voice. The dark circles under his eyes speak to long nights and little sleep.
My body sways instinctively. This tiny bundle of terror in my arms is fast asleep now, and I don’t dare stop moving.
When I walked into Ginny and Carson’s house, it was bedlam. Nina was screaming, Carson was shushing her while trying to feed her, and poor Ginny had tears streaming down her face as she sat on the couch, watching her partner and their baby both get progressively more frustrated.
Something came over me, and I plucked Nina out of Carson’s arms and shooed them away.
They both looked at me as if I were a complete stranger before they hightailed it out of the room like their asses were on fire.
I’d have laughed if I didn’t have an inconsolable baby to deal with.
The minute Carson and Ginny were gone, I looked down at Nina and said, “Well, that was stupid. What shall we do now?”
I plopped her against my chest, patting her back the way I’ve seen Carson do many times, completely unsure of how to get a baby to stop crying.
Then, to my utter delight, the tiny thing ripped out a massive burp and finally settled. I tempted her with more milk, and she passed out about twenty minutes ago. My arms are aching. Who knew something so tiny could become this heavy after being held for this long?
“You look good with a baby in your arms, brother.” Carson smirks.
Ginny’s giggle has me lifting an eyebrow at her. “What’s so funny over there?”
She glides toward me, looking fresh-faced and slightly more rejuvenated. She flips her phone screen around to show me a text thread with Adalaide. Ginny sent an image of me holding Nina, and Addie’s response makes me chuckle.
“Tell her I’d rather her ovaries not explode as I have plans for them in the future.”
“Damn, man. Who knew you could be such a smooth talker?” Carson teases.
“So things are going well between you two?” Ginny asks. She encourages me to take a seat on the couch now that Nina is down for the count. I gratefully accept the reprieve, my arms screaming in thanks.
“Things are incredible. I didn’t believe you guys when you said finding the right person makes all the difference. I hate that I never gave her enough credit, but I’m glad we’re happening now. I don’t think either of us would’ve been ready for a relationship before.”
“I think that’s the most I’ve ever heard him speak in one go,” Carson fake-whispers to Ginny.
“I’d throw something at you if I didn’t have a baby in my arms,” I grouse.
“What’s Addie up to today? And also, why are you here so early? Not that we aren’t grateful. We were both about to lose it there for a second,” Carson says.
“Yeah, it was really nice to have a break for a bit.” Ginny’s cheeks heat as Carson gives her a dirty smirk.
I keep my laugh inside. Ginny wouldn’t appreciate me laughing at her embarrassment. I’m glad I could help them reconnect though. It seemed like things were about to get a little too tense.
“Addie is meeting with Zane today to talk about everything that happened. She’s ready to forgive him and move on. Coward that I am, I couldn’t be around while she did that. Figured I’d come see how you guys were holding up.”
It’s been two weeks since the revelation of my half brother’s return, and I still don’t know what I want to do about it.
I don’t begrudge Addie’s readiness to forgive.
He was her best friend for a long time, and in the end, he kept his connection to me a secret because he’d chosen to keep her as a friend rather than reconnecting with me.
It was a little short-sighted, I suppose, but I would also do whatever it took to keep Adalaide in my life.
“It’s not cowardice if you’re not ready to talk to him,” Ginny says softly.
“My therapist said the same thing. It’s been tough to separate the past from the present. He brings up a lot of things I thought I’d put behind me.”
“Is he still staying with Levi and Hope?” Carson asks.
“Yeah. He might’ve lied, but he didn’t do anything truly wrong. He’s a good guy who doesn’t deserve half the shit he’s had to deal with these past few months.”
“You’ve handled this whole situation with more grace than most people would’ve,” Ginny says. “We’re really proud of you, Michael.”
I smile at my best friends, uncomfortable with their praise. “I’ve already tamed your wild child. You don’t have to keep buttering me up.”
They both laugh as I hoped they would. Ginny’s phone rings a few minutes later, her twin’s face filling the screen.
“Are you guys busy?” Gia asks without preamble.
“Nope. Carson and I are watching Michael take care of our daughter right now. What’s up?”
“I’m going to come back to that topic later.” Gia laughs. “I think I found something in Victoria’s journal.”
“Then we’d better gather the gang.”
“I’ll call Lottie and Teddy, you find Ryan, and we’ll all meet up at your place?”
“On it,” Ginny confirms before hanging up. She dials Ryan immediately, who happily accepts our invitation for a break from working on admin stuff at the shop.
Before long, everyone has found a seat in Carson and Ginny’s living room. Gia has pages of notes laid out on the coffee table, her face brighter than I’ve seen it in a while. Maybe this was what she needed to get out of her funk.
Ginny has taken Nina from me, snuggling her daughter into the crook of her neck. I oddly miss the weight of her in my arms.
I meant what I said to Addie earlier. I’d like to have kids of my own someday.
I want the chance to give them everything I didn’t have.
Even after Todd and Megan adopted me, I couldn’t enjoy my freedom for all the trauma I still had to overcome.
And while I might’ve been able to move forward, it will always be a part of me.
I’m grateful Adalaide is fully aware of that fact and wants to be with me regardless.
Gia’s voice pulls me out of my thoughts.
“I took photos of Victoria’s journal entries and printed them out so I could make notes in the margins.
I also used different highlighters to signify different topics: Colin, our mystery man, the repeated phrases from the letters, and things I wanted to research later.
Some of this might’ve gotten lost in translation.
She has a very frilly way of writing that I can’t be sure isn’t just part of the time instead of something meaningful. ”
“I had the same issue when I noticed the repeated phrases,” Ginny adds.
“However, I think I found the identity of our mystery man.”
“Way to bury the lede!” Lottie exclaims.
Gia grins, pleased by her theatrics. She pulls out a few pages from her stacks. “I’m not positive, because she only names him once, but it’s the only logical conclusion I’ve found.”
Lottie takes the offered page and reads it aloud.
“‘Mother has abandoned all sense of decorum as spring has begun to bloom. She’s in a frenzy over her gardens appearing drab. Never have I seen such a multitude of staff around our home, the majority of whom are bandying about without proper instruction. I shall have to take charge eventually. Mother is lost to her insanity, and her capability to lead is diminished. Perhaps benefits abound in the duty. Edward makes a fine gardener.’”
“It’s not much to go on,” Gia hedges. “But I don’t think she’d have come right out and said she had the hots for a gardener.
Especially if she was betrothed to Colin.
” She flips through other pages with green highlights.
“But she makes several mentions of walking through the gardens and that she’s starting to fall for her companion.
I think her hope was that if someone were to read her entries, they’d think she was talking about Colin instead of someone below her station. ”
“It would make sense,” Ryan says. “One of the phrases that was used frequently was ‘the peony is about to bloom.’ It wouldn’t be a stretch to think someone familiar with flowers would use it as code.”
Gia bites the inside of her cheek before blurting out her theory. “I think Victoria was pregnant, and I’m pretty sure it was Edward’s.”
The whole room goes silent.
“I’m going to need you to elaborate,” Lottie demands.
“Right, okay.” Gia blows out a breath. “Throughout the entire journal, she mentions Colin by name and how fond she is of him, but when I read the entries about Edward, there was a huge difference. She seems like she was very much in love with him. Toward the end of the journal, Victoria mentions becoming ill out of nowhere. She talks about needing to hide it to keep everyone from worrying. I think she knew she was pregnant, but that was a huge no-no back then. Then Colin got assaulted, and in her final entry, she states—” Gia picks up a page.
“‘Safety has become paramount. We cannot continue as we were. Our hope lies in a future where we shall be liberated from persecution. Determination will set us free.’”
“They really did run away,” Ginny says with reverence.
“I think all three of them ran away together.”
Carson raises an eyebrow. “Like together together?”
Gia shrugs. “I’m not sure. Nothing really indicated that she loved Colin the same way she loved Edward. And going back over Colin’s letters with a different light, I don’t think he loved Victoria as anything more than a friend either.”
“What if he was gay?” Ryan asks.
“It would explain why he was assaulted,” Carson says. “And potentially why it wasn’t safe for them to live there. They were likely worried Colin would be attacked again.”
Lottie jumps in. “And Victoria and Edward’s relationship would’ve never been accepted. Even if there was a baby.”
“So what do we do now?” Ginny asks.
I give the obvious answer. “We try to find out where they went.”