Chapter Fifty-Nine
Luc
Vitamin D.
Me: Bonjour, Mon Soleil. Did you sleep well?
M y heart races as I wait for her response. The office is quiet, since it’s Christmas Eve. It’s just me and the security guard, but if I stay in the penthouse, I’ll go crazy. Even though she was only there for a few weeks, she’s everywhere.
Her favorite vanilla candle still sits by the stove, its faint scent lingering in the air. The nugget ice machine on the counter. She likes to eat ice when she thinks no one’s watching.
Her reply comes through.
Rylee: Bonjor, and yes.
A smile tugs at my lips.
Me: Did you dream about me?
I type, already imagining her rolling her eyes.
Rylee: You’re the one dreaming.
I chuckle to myself. She’s right. I am.
Me: Make sure you eat, okay?
If it was up to her, she’d forget to eat entirely. I make a mental note to call Pamela, just in case. I can’t have her passing out, especially if I’m not there to take care of her.
I don’t know how much time she needs. I’ll be patient, but God, I miss her. All I want to do is drive there and see her.
Beyond the glass window facing her office, I can still picture her at her desk, sometimes laughing with Leon. The image makes my chest ache.
A knock at the door pulls me back to reality. I groan, the memory of her slipping away.
“Come in.”
The door opens, and Adele, the head of my design team, steps inside, carrying a sleek black box.
She sets it on my desk with a small smile.
“Is this it?” My fingers twitch to reach for it.
She nods.
I open the box, inspecting each piece. They’re perfect—exactly how I imagined. I spent hours on the sketches, and the design team and seamstresses have spent weeks ensuring every detail is flawless. I can’t wait for her to see them.
“How’s everything going with the new collection for the New York expansion?”
“We’re right on schedule sir.”
“Perfect.” I clasp my hands together, satisfaction settling in my chest.
At first, I designed this collection just for her. But then she saw my sketches and mentioned how perfect they would be for BCAK’s US launch. I decided to include the Rylee’s Collection. She has no idea yet, and I can’t wait to see her reaction.
“Enjoy your holiday,” I say as Adele walks out.
“Joyeus Noél, sir.”
Opening my desk drawer, I pull out the necklace I bought for her and carefully place it inside the box. I grab everything I need before moving to the couch to wrap it up. Bertrand will be here soon to pick it up. Just in time for Christmas.
I spend the rest of the afternoon keeping myself busy, not staring at our wedding photos. Once I get home, I take a shower and sit on the couch. A book is open my lap, and I’ve been on the same page for the past thirty minutes. It’s hard to focus when my mind is so full of her.
My phone rings, and I nearly jump when I see her name. I double tap my earbud to answer.
“Hi.” I try to compose myself, but it’s hard to hide my smile when I hear her voice.
“Hi,” she says softly.
I lean back on the couch, shutting my eyes for a few seconds, savoring the sound of her voice. “Couldn’t sleep?”
She exhales through my earbuds. “Not really. Is it okay if we talk for a while?”
“Baby, I can talk to you for hours.”
She’s quiet for a while, as if she’s thinking of what to say. I close my eyes again, listening to her breathing. My eyes drift to the TV as I imagine her curling up on the couch watching one of her telenovelas. Most of the time, I pretended to be reading, but really I just watched her. Her little gasps, the way she talked to the characters as if they could hear her. I would do anything to have her here again, reacting to her shows while I memorized her reactions.
“What did you do today?” She pulls me out of my thoughts.
“I went to the office and worked on some details for the new launch.”
“The office? On Christmas Eve?”
“Yeah.” I chuckle, but it’s full of longing. “It’s hard being here without you.”
She’s silent again for a moment. “Can I ask you something?”
“Anything, baby.”
“What’s going on between you and your brother? Why does he seem to hate you so much?”
I exhale slowly, running a hand through my curly hair. I knew this question would come eventually. “We only found out about him a few years ago. When his mom told my dad she was pregnant, he told her to get rid of the baby because he didn’t want my mom to find out.”
“But she didn’t,” she adds for me.
“No. She kept him. And when he turned eighteen, he found us.” I pause and stare at the high ceiling. “We tried to welcome him. I did, but I think he resented me. Because I got the childhood he never had. A father he never knew. I thought maybe, with time, he’d let it go. But I guess he never did. Even after Dad had his stroke and gave him part of the company.”
“Did you ever want a brother?”
Her question catches me a little off guard.
“When my sister was born, I fell in love with her instantly. I was twelve, and she was this tiny, perfect thing.” A small smile tugs at my lips as I remember holding my baby sister for the first time. “Then I turned sixteen, my parents sent me to school in London, and I missed her like hell. That’s when I met Alain and Cassian. Alain and I became like brothers. Even though he already had a twin, I never felt like a third wheel.”
“But it wasn’t the same,” she says like she’s reading my mind.
“No. What Alain and Cassian had is different. Stronger.” I force myself to swallow. “So when I found out I had a brother, I thought maybe I’d finally have that.” I exhale through my nose. “But Olivier never saw it that way.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I’m okay with it now.”
I sigh, running a hand through my hair, trying to push down the question clawing at my throat.
“Can I ask you something?” I ask.
“Yeah,” she whispers.
“That night, after I asked you to marry me, why did you go to the bar?”
She doesn’t answer right away.
“I guess I needed to remind myself it wasn’t real. That we weren’t real.” Her fears press into every syllable. “Because when it came to you, the lines were always blurred. And that scared me,” she says quieter now, like she’s admitting something to herself for the first time.
“The lines were never blurry for me. It was always you. It always is. It will always be you.”
Silence. Then her breath hitches like she’s struggling to hold back tears.
“What do I have to do to prove it to you?” I ask softly.
She’s quiet, and the silence is killing me.
“I want to try, but I just need you to be patient with me, please,” she says. I can hear it. The way she’s struggling, the way she’s trying not to cry. Fuck, I hate this. I fucking need her here. In my arms. I need to hold her, to make her feel it, to believe it. “I can’t promise I won’t get scared, or try to push you away when it gets too much,” she continues.
I shake my head, even though she can’t see me. I don’t need her to promise me anything as long as she lets me show her how much I love her.
“But I don’t want to run anymore, I just want to know you won’t give up on me.”
“Never, baby.”
“I’m not ready to see you yet, but I don’t want to stop talking with you.”
“It’s okay, Mon Trésor. I’ll wait for as long as you need me to.” I exhale, forcing myself to breathe, to be patient, even when it’s killing me inside.
She swallows audibly, and the faintest sniffle escapes her. The sound shatters me. Since I’m not there to hold her, I have to do something to make her smile.
“Baby, I’m not feeling too good.” I groan dramatically.
“You okay? What’s wrong?” She sounds alert.
“I think I’m suffering from a lack of Vitamin You.” I sigh.
A small breathy laugh escapes her. “You’re ridiculous.”
Mission accomplished.
“But I made you smile.” The ache of missing her is momentarily drowned out by her laugh. My chest swells, and I sink deeper into the couch.
She inhales, the sound barely audible, but I can feel it against my skin, like she’s right next to me.
“Ugh, I could use some vitamin D right now.”
I freeze. Did she just…
“Baby…” I drawl, grinning like an idiot. “Did you just—”
“Oh my God!” she gasps. “I didn’t mean to say that out loud.”
I chuckle, leaning back on the couch. “Mon amour, just say the word, and I’ll deliver your Vitamin D straight to you right now.”
“Luc, shut up.”
“Hey, I’m just looking out for my wife’s health. Immediate delivery with premium service.”
She groans, and I can practically hear her smacking her forehead. “I hate you.”
“No, you don’t.”
She laughs again, and I adore that sound.
I’m addicted to the way she makes me feel, how she fills me up. I can imagine spending my life with her, waking up next to her, making love to her.
Mon dieu, je l’adore. (God, I adore her.)