57. Lily
FIFTY-SEVEN
LILY
I wake up in an ER hospital bed, and there isn’t a single part of me that isn’t aching.
“Lily, Jesus fucking Christ.” Chase’s voice pulls me out of the inventory I’m taking of my body, and he rushes to my side.
I open my mouth to speak but sharp pain radiates through my jaw. I close it slowly and wince, my right hand coming up to soothe the ache. Burning scorches through my arm, my mouth popping back open. “Ow, fuck .”
Chase smirks. “Yeah, I bet that hurt.”
“What happened?” I force out, tamping down the agony searing through the right side of my body.
Chase sighs, picking up my left hand. His eyes dark and murderous. “Your asshole ex is what the fuck happened.”
My body jerks and I stutter out a whimper from the pain of suddenly moving.
Chase stiffens. “Do you need me to call someone in here? They said they’d be back in a minute, but if you need something for the pain relief…”
“No.” My voice is sharp. “No drugs.”
Chase’s eyes fog over as he nods. “Right. Right, fuck , of course not.”
“I had just gotten home and saw your car.” Another voice cuts in and my eyes flicker to Derek, his hair mussed in different directions, his blue eyes sharp and penetrating. “And another one parked haphazardly in my front yard. The front door was slightly ajar, and something just felt off. I was already on the phone with 911 when I heard the gunshot.”
My insides clench tight, my left hand squeezing Chase’s tighter. Gunshot . I was shot. By Darryl.
That motherfucker.
“I’m so glad you’re okay,” I mutter, trying not to move my jaw too much.
“Fuck, Lil, we’re glad you’re okay,” Chase says.
“I went to go after him, but when I saw you bleeding on the floor…” Derek exhales a shaky breath. “My mind went blank and you were all I could focus on.”
“So he got away,” I conclude.
Derek cringes, nodding.
Chase squeezes my fingers. “He will never get to you again, Lily.”
Smiling softly, I ignore the throbbing ache that spreads across my temples. “You can’t promise me that, Chase.”
I have to wonder if I’ll ever truly escape the choices of my past or if I’m destined to live in their shadow for eternity. I’ve been here for less than a month, and already I’m turning other people’s lives upside down.
Darryl knows where I am. He knows I’m back. He fucking knows where Derek lives, and it’s only a matter of time before he comes to finish the job.
My life was just fine before all of this. Before Chase sent his goon to come find me. Before Mason entered my damn life.
Mason .
Alex.
My heart squeezes tight, wishing more than anything that he was here, even through my anger. That he’d hold my face in his palms and wipe away the prints of Darryl’s grip. Tell me he’ll never let another thing come between us.
That he’ll protect me and my baby boy.
There’s nowhere I’ve ever felt safer than with him.
Chase’s jaw muscles tic. “I can promise it. I won’t let him get away with this shit. I should have killed him when I saw him last.”
The curtain surrounding the bed swings back, and a man walks in with a nurse at his side, white lab coat and a stethoscope around his neck. He smiles gently, pushing glasses up his nose.
“Well, look who’s awake.” His grin widens, but my mind is too rattled from the day’s events to pay too much attention. “How are you feeling?”
“Like I’ve been hit by a truck.”
He nods. “The bullet used was a 9mm and, luckily, stayed intact when it entered the body.”
Lucky.
What a concept. Nothing about my situation feels lucky. It feels like I’ve been beaten half to death by my drug-addled ex. It feels like he tried to kill me. It feels like I’ve made things worse for everyone, just like I always have.
“It was a clean exit and didn’t hit any nerves or tendons.”
Chase stares at the doctor, his hand never leaving mine. “So what does that mean?”
The doctor’s eyes focus on him. “It means that after a quick antibiotic drip and some X-rays, she’ll be free to go.” His gaze comes back to me. “She’ll need to be monitored closely over the next few days, to make sure there are no complications.” He taps the side of his head.
“From the gunshot wound?” I ask, my brain muddled. I don’t understand what he’s saying.
“From the blunt force trauma to your head.” His lips turn down. “Any confusion, problems breathing, loss of consciousness, you need to bring her back in immediately.”
“I’m right here,” I hiss through my teeth, grabbing on to the irritation of him talking like I’m not in the room to keep myself from falling apart at the seams.
He looks over to me and grins slightly. “My apologies, Ms. Adams. Do you have any questions for me? Would you like something to manage the pain?”
For just a split second, I consider saying yes. But then Darryl’s face flashes through my mind, the deep scarring on his cheeks, the glazed and empty look in his eyes, and disgust churns in my gut.
“No,” I say, just like earlier. “No drugs.” I turn my gaze to Chase, suddenly desperate for them to understand. “Don’t let them give me any drugs.”
Chase’s lips turn down in the corner, his fingers squeezing mine. “I won’t let them, Lil.”
The doctor nods. “All right, then we’ll get you taken care of and you should be out of here within the next couple hours.”
* * *
Three and a half hours later, Chase pulls into his driveway, turning off the engine and sighing as he looks over at me. “You’re not gonna run again, are you?”
Gritting my teeth, I shake my head. “I can’t take Chase away from the only family he’s ever known.”
He nods, sucking on his teeth. “Good. I’d just find you again anyway.”
I stare down at my hand, the urge to scratch at my wrist strong, but as I go to move, a stinging pain in my shoulder reminds me that my arm is in a sling and I can’t.
“Are you gonna be okay?” he asks.
I shrug. The past few weeks combined with the events of today coagulate until they’re a giant blood clot, forcing my heart to work double time in order to simply beat.
He swallows, his Adam’s apple bobbing. I continue to stare at him, the haze creeping up over my mind, whispering that it can protect me. Keep me safe from having to deal with these pesky emotions.
“I called Sam and Anna. They wanted to come to the hospital, but I told them I wasn’t sure if you would want C to see you like this.”
My chest squeezes at the nickname that everyone in the family has taken to using for my baby boy.
“You’re right. Thank you.” The throbbing intensifies in my head. I’m sure I look like a complete disaster, but I’m scared to look in the mirror, not wanting to see the sins of my past showing as bruises on my face. I try to move to open the car door but forget again that my arm is in a sling, and everything hurts. Tears burn behind my eyes, frustration making me grit my teeth. “Can you…can you help me open the door?” I stutter out.
Chase’s lips draw down as he nods. “There’s one more thing.” He cringes. “You’re probably gonna want to kill me, but he deserved to know. He would have wanted to know.”
My insides freeze. “Who is ‘he’?”
“Mason. He’s here.”
His hand waves in front of us, to the black Harley-Davidson that’s parked off to the side—the one I didn’t take time to notice when we first pulled in. My lungs cramp and I suck in a breath, hurt clashing against visceral need, my vulnerability not knowing which one to cling to.
I lean my head back against the headrest, unsure how to feel. Part of me is still so angry with him. But the bigger part of me craves his comfort, knowing he’s the only person who has ever been able to bring me back when I’m feeling lost in the wind. Blowing out a slow breath, I nod.
“Well, let’s go in and greet him.”