Chapter Sixty-Two
Willow
“All right, Willow. It’s time for you to get up and stop wallowing,” an overly chipper voice says, entering without so much as a knock.
This room sucks, and I hate it anyway, but still, her complete disregard makes me hiss.
I’m wrapped in blanket after blanket, all the wrong fabric and density, but the enclosed feeling is something I need.
It’s nothing near as good as my safe-room nest, not even the too-big makeshift space the guys made me—but it’s all I have.
Whoever this newcomer is, they don’t matter, so I stay curled up in the unpleasant blanket fort.
There’s a sudden brightening of light, then the obnoxious squeak of a hinge opening the window. Annoyance bubbles in my belly, wrath growing in my veins until it spews from my mouth.
“Go away. You haven’t brought me either of my Alphas, so get the fuck out of my space. And close the damn window!” My fingers become claws, digging into my blankets as I try to hold myself together.
There’s a sharp tug on the comforter I’m burrowed under, and I grab it, holding it taut until it slips from my deformed fingers.
I’m no match for an Alpha’s strength, regardless, but with my fingers the way they are, it’s like taking candy from a baby.
The bedspread lifts off me, and I come face-to-face with a very pretty woman. Great.
“No can do. You’re freaking out my beta.
That’s why I’m here. So, let’s figure this out together.
” She looks familiar, but though I’m racking my brain, I can’t quite place her.
The scent of frost drifts over me, and while it’s not a particularly offensive smell, it makes my inner omega irrationally angry.
A scream rips from me, it’s unhelpful and nonsensical, yet I don’t even care. My body aches, my eyes burn, and all I know is that I want this wrong-smelling Alpha to disappear. “Go away! Go away! Go away! How many times do I need to say it before you people get it?”
Grabbing a useless, lumpy pillow, I hurl it at the female Alpha, who catches it easily and then looks at me with pity in her eyes. Take your damn sympathy and shove it.
“Good God. Gavin and Calloway were right about you being grumpy and difficult. You are the polar opposite of your sister.” Undeterred by my outburst, the she-Alpha tosses the pillow atop my bed before advancing deeper into the room.
Sister. Which sister?
“You’re still here,” I grumble, trying to smooth out my piece-of-shit makeshift nest. “Without either of my Alphas. I told Gavin and Calloway to leave me alone until they retrieved Linc and Cujo.” Fixing her with a pointed glare, I wait for a reply. The silence stretches between us.
And stretches.
And stretches.
“Which sister?” I can’t help but ask.
“Oakley.” Her response is short, sweet, and doesn’t even come close to telling me what I want to know.
The short brown hair at her shoulder bobs as she wanders around my space.
Tall, with a curvy body that seems more omega than Alpha, she inspects the room, then finally takes a seat in the chair closest to the window.
It’s a kindness. Her scent slowly dissipates, leaving me more weary than angry. “I’m Carmine, by the way.”
The name triggers my memories, snatches of conversations, and I realize she’s Calloway’s Alpha. And if I’m remembering correctly, Gavin’s situationship as well. Don’t quote me on it, though. While all that is fascinating, I’m only interested in one thing.
“If you’re here, who’s with Oakley?” I haven’t met Carmine before, unless it was during the haze of the early days. But I don’t think so.
“Calloway’s there, although your sister prefers not to be around males.
He’s staying nearby and will only bother her if he detects a threat.
We thought it was more important that I was here.
Gavin said his pheromones in particular were making your disposition worse.
” She crosses her legs and lays her arms along the sides of the chair, acting nonchalant, but I can tell she’s agitated.
“You don’t like being away from Oakley.” Her body language gives it away.
“No,” she agrees, “Oakley struggles with some self-destructive behaviors when left to her own devices. I prefer to stay close, to make sure she remains healthy.”
“What kind of behaviors?” Oakley’s always been so happy and strong. She embraced the spotlight when we were younger, managing it with a quiet grace that was completely awe-inspiring. Imagining her as anything other than resilient has my hands gripping the covers. My pulse pounds at my throat.
Carmine uncrosses, then recrosses her legs. “That’s up to her to tell you when and if she deems you worthy. I’m here to talk about you.” Irritation flashes through me. While I understand her loyalty, if something is going on with my sister, I should know.
“Maybe she needs you to tell me. Maybe I can help.”
Carmine’s face goes stony, and it’s clear I won’t be able to get anywhere with her if I don’t give a little.
For some reason, my instincts are different around Carmine.
Although she’s an Alpha, her presence isn’t as offensive to me as Gavin’s overwhelming dominance, so I bend, voicing my feelings.
“I swear I’m not trying to be difficult, it’s just that everything is really hard right now. ”
A lump the size of a watermelon forms in my throat, and I swallow, waiting for her to respond, but the female Alpha remains still and focused, ready to listen.
I sort through my thoughts, wrapping my blanket closer around me, and I do my best to explain the situation.
Hopefully, she’ll be more rational than Gavin.
“I feel like, right now, I can’t control any of my emotions.
Honestly, I can’t control anything. It’s making my omega spiral.
I’ve been removed from all my comforts, my dog, my Alphas, and I can’t even talk to my sisters.
Everything aches, and I just want it all to be over,” I whisper.
Saying the words out loud hurts almost as much as keeping them in.
Tears flood my eyes. Why can’t you be stronger than this?
This is nothing compared to what Aspen’s enduring.
Those thoughts bring a fresh batch of tears.
Carmine takes it all in, closing her eyes as if in pain, but when she opens them, there’s nothing besides kindness and concern shining back at me.
“Thank you for explaining and for your honesty. I think, if we work together, we can mitigate some of those issues. I know it probably feels like you’re a prisoner here, but that’s not our intent.
” She fidgets with the sleeve of her shirt.
“Now, you mentioned feeling under the weather. Can you tell me a little bit about what’s going on?
Is it the burns and bruises from the fire, or something else? ”
Her shrewd question makes me think, really think, and I consider everything I’m going through: mild cramps, sensitivity of my skin and eyes, the nausea that just won’t go away.
Shit.
“I think it’s not from the fire anymore. Do you know if the doctor has been giving me suppressants while I’ve been here?”
Her lips press together, and her nostrils flare, scenting me. “I’m not sure, but I’ll find out, because if he hasn’t, it’s been well over a week since you took any. It’d be too late to stop your heat from coming.”
Dread crawls up my back. My heat? I haven’t had one before. During my presentation, I was sedated and cared for under my parents’ watchful eyes. After that, I chose suppressants. Sure, I have had spikes here or there, but never a full-fledged heat.
Longing for my Alphas builds within me, welling in my chest until there’s no space for anything else.
“We can’t let that happen without Cujo and Lincoln.” I cringe at how small my voice sounds. Begging and pleading isn’t my style. But having my first real heat without them? That might be the thing to completely break me. As if I’m not already damaged enough.
Carmine stands, her face severe, and considers me once more. “If your heat’s really coming, them not being here might be dangerous. I’m going to find out what options we have. Sedation, Alpha agents we know are trustworthy—we’ll figure it out.”
“No!” The scream breaks free. “No Alphas besides mine.” The hissing from my throat is nearly feral, and I snatch up a pillow, ready to launch the ineffectual thing. Where’s my damn knife?
“An unfulfilled cycle could kill you, Willow.” She dodges the pillow shooting at her face and rolls her eyes.
“Then go get me who I need and stop fucking around.”
She shakes her head. “Willow, you don’t understand. I want to bring you Dean and Lincoln. I don’t think they’d ever harm you. The problem is, we’re worried that bringing them will expose our safe house and alert Pack Mordred to the fact that you survived.”
“That’s a risk I’m willing to take. Let Devlin and his cronies find me. Maybe this time we’ll get one step closer to finding Aspen.” There’s no reason to live if this loneliness is all I’ll ever have.
We stare each other down. It’s a stalemate of sorts, a distinct disagreement, and I’m shocked when Carmine drops her gaze.
“I promise I’ll try. I understand where you’re coming from.
I can’t guarantee much right now, but a tablet should be okay.
Oakley loves those chats, so I know how important they are to you all. I swear, I will work on the rest.”
It’s not enough. My stomach cramps, and I hang my head as she leaves the room.
Time to start planning my escape…