Chapter 16
My hand shook as I clicked the final answer on my board exam, and I sucked in a breath and held it while the loading symbol spun on the screen.
When a short survey popped up instead of my results, I tensed my jaw, still holding that breath as I clicked through it.
Another loading symbol appeared.
My heart galloped, and I don’t think I even blinked as I stared at the screen.
Waiting.
Waiting.
Pass.
The air rushed from my lungs, and my cheeks lifted in a grin. I did it. I was suddenly filled with a burst of excited energy and was practically vibrating in my seat as I gathered my things. I stood, exited the testing room, and reported to the proctor at the front desk to check out.
“Congratulations,” she said with a smile, handing me the printed document with my results.
I was still grinning. “Thank you.”
When I walked out of the testing center, I pulled my phone from my purse and turned it on. I hadn’t looked at it before I took the exam because I knew I’d have messages, and I didn’t want to psych myself out reading them.
Sure enough, when my phone came to life, messages began rolling in, and I scrolled through the notifications.
Mom
I know you’ll do great today! So proud of you! Call me when you’re done!
Wes
I won’t think any less of you if you fail, seester.
Morgan
Ignore your brother. He thinks he’s doing reverse psychology. You’re going to pass!
Callie
Good luck today, Haley!
Lucas
Good luck, kid!
Marie
You got this! Remember, we’re going out either way! Pass - celebrating. Fail - wallowing in well-deserved self-pity. Love you!
The last message made me pause.
Blake
Good luck.
It was simple and straightforward. Bland even. But I smiled like an idiot at it.
I clicked open his message. I told Marie she would be the first to know how I did…but I took a selfie with the paper that said “pass”, and I sent it to Blake, making him the first.
A moment later, as I walked to my car, my phone chimed.
Blake
I had no doubt.
Going to the Anchor to celebrate tonight with some others from work. You should come after your shift.
Maybe.
Okay. Well, if you can’t make it, I’ll see you tomorrow at work.
I wasn’t going to push for him to go. I didn’t want to come off as desperate—because I wasn’t—and I didn’t want him to feel like he had to do anything he didn’t want to. But there was a part of me that couldn’t help but hope he might decide to show up.
I’d been thinking about Blake more than I probably should. All weekend, in fact. Because Friday night, when he was leaving my house, I could’ve sworn he actually thought about kissing me. And I had no intention of stopping him if he did.
Then, he stepped back and said he should go, and I was left wondering all damn weekend what would have happened—could have happened—if he’d gone through with it. And I found myself feeling slightly disappointed that he hadn’t.
That afternoon, I met my mom for a celebratory lunch, and she said we would celebrate with my brother and Morgan on Sunday during dinner. She let me choose what we were going to have—I picked a seafood boil.
I headed to The Rusty Anchor that night and met up with Marie and some others from work, celebrating with them. A few of them brought me small gifts as a gesture of congratulations. Even the doctors showed up—all but the one I was hoping would come.
Blake’s shift ended at seven. By the time nine o’clock rolled around, I knew he wasn’t coming. I shouldn’t have felt disappointed—again—but I was, and I wasn’t entirely sure what to make of feeling that way for the second time in three days.
I’d just gotten another drink at the bar when the bell above the door rang, and I glanced over my shoulder. I turned away, but my gaze snapped back, doing a double take.
It was Blake.
He came.
I turned and smiled as he approached. “You made it,” I said, trying to keep my voice casual.
“Yeah, sorry I’m late. I got held up with a patient, so I didn’t get out right at seven, then I had to run home to check on and feed Maverick.”
“Ah,” I nodded. “Well, you didn’t have to come back out after going home, but I’m glad you did. Are you gonna have a drink, or…?”
“Yeah, I’ll stay for one.”
I watched him signal the bartender and ask for a beer before turning to look at me again. “How are you feeling knowing you passed and you’re all done?”
“Relieved,” I replied with a chuckle.
“I remember the feeling.” He thanked the bartender when he gave him his drink and handed him cash to pay for it, telling him to keep the change. “So, what now?”
I took in a breath and let it out slowly. “I’ll stay on as an RN until I receive my official license, which takes about six to eight weeks. Once I have that, I’ll move into my NP role, but with a preceptor that Dr. Tomblin is going to assign me.”
He nodded. “Are you thinking about doing your ENP?”
“Yeah. They want me to have it—it was part of the stipulation for them making the position for me. I have to sign up for the certification by the end of my first year.”
“Ah, so you’re not technically done, per se, since you’ll have to take that exam,” he teased.
I playfully rolled my eyes. “No, I suppose not, but as far as school itself, I’m done.”
“Fair enough,” he said with a smile before sipping his drink.
Blake and I spent the next hour talking when we weren’t getting roped into conversations from the others. Marie was grinning and giving me a conspiratorial look while Blake was having a hushed conversation with Dr. Wileman at the bar.
I gave her a look back that told her to mind her business, but she just laughed and waggled her brows. “I’m just saying–”
“Don’t.” I shook my head. “Don’t say anything.”
“You could end this amazing day of yours with a bang, pun intended.”
“I hate you.”
“No, you don’t.” She grinned. “Not even close.”
Blake finished off his one drink in the midst of his conversation with Dr. Wileman before finding me at the other end of the bar, where I was talking to Marie and a few of the other nurses. “Hey, I think I’m going to head out.”
I nodded. “Okay. I’ll, uh…let me walk you out.” I didn’t give him a chance to protest before I started moving toward the door.
We stepped outside and walked down the sidewalk to the parking lot, turning into it and moving to the far back corner.
When we neared his parking spot, he turned, and we both leaned against the driver’s side of his Jeep, facing one another. “I need you to do something for me before you leave.”
He arched his brow. “And what’s that?”
“Tell me something real.”
“This again?” he deadpanned.
“Yes,” I replied with a smile. “Consider it a congratulatory gift to me for passing my exam.”
“I wasn’t aware I was supposed to give you a gift,” he quipped.
“Well, now you are. So, humor me.”
Blake sighed. “Something real…” he muttered, shifting his eyes as if to think about it before meeting my gaze again.
“I’m proud of you.” I tilted my head, giving him a look for his answer because it wasn’t what I was looking for…
but hearing him say that made something in my chest flutter.
He shrugged with the ghost of a smile. “It’s the truth, so it makes it real. ”
“Fine. I’ll take it,” I said with a hint of amusement. “And thank you for helping me study so I passed.”
“That was all you. I didn’t do anything but read some words off a page.”
“That’s not true. You explained things. And you made me not second-guess myself as much. So, just accept my gratitude.”
He let out a quiet laugh. “Fine. I accept it.”
As I continued to stare up at him, my thoughts tumbled back to the other night—standing on my front porch, the flutter in my stomach when I saw his eyes drop to my lips, not just once but several times.
Now, I was the one looking at his lips. It’d been three months since we hooked up, and in the haze of alcohol and time, I’d nearly forgotten how it felt to kiss him.
I found myself suddenly wishing for a refresher course in the art of kissing Blake Pierson.
“You need to stop looking at me like that,” he said, his voice more gruff than it was moments ago.
I unconsciously shifted closer, bridging the small gap between us a little more as I searched his blue eyes. The scent of his cologne—crisp mountain air with earthy undertones of sandalwood, rugged but not overpowering—filled my senses. “Like what?”
“You know what.” Despite his words, he didn’t move away. He stared down at me with a look in his eyes I couldn’t quite decipher. “We should stay away from each other like this, Haley,” he said, his voice even lower now. “This is twice now.”
Twice. He was talking about the other night.
“Well, maybe that means we don’t want to stay away,” I said, my voice carrying a soft, playful lilt as I stared up at him. God…he was the size of a damn tree, and I wanted to climb him like one. Again.
Despite my words and my improper thoughts, I took a step back. Because something told me he wasn’t going to cave. And I didn’t want him doing something that, deep down, he didn’t want to do or, worse, would regret.
Blake gently shook his head, letting out a breathy chuckle that I could have sworn sounded like a mix between disappointment and relief, though I wasn’t sure. “You’re trouble.”
A slow smirk curled on my lips at those words. “Yeah…you told me that once before.”
I saw his eyes flare with recognition. He remembered exactly when he last said that to me, and what we were doing.
I turned, heading back toward the bar, but I glanced over my shoulder. “Goodnight, Blake.”
“Goodnight…”
I felt another flutter in my chest at the low rasp in his voice. It made me wonder…but I quickly pushed the thought aside as I rounded the corner out of the parking lot.
This was why having a hopeless romantic heart wasn’t always a good thing. We had a tendency to fall quickly and idealize connections, some that weren’t even there but only conjured by our unwavering, unrealistic minds.
I pressed my palm against my chest over my racing heart. “Down, girl.”
Over the next several weeks, Blake and I kept things between us strictly professional.
Even when we shared lunch breaks at work, our conversations were work-related.
Sometimes, we’d mention things about our mutual circle of friends and family, but it wasn’t often.
At least, not from him, it wasn’t, which seemed strange.
Something was off with Blake.
I noticed it happening gradually, like a shadow slowly stretching at dusk.
He became quieter. He appeared lost in thought more and more.
Where he was typically in his element at work, he now seemed on edge.
He appeared vigilant, but almost too much so.
And I swore there were a few times where I’d see him, and it was like he was someplace else entirely before he’d snap out of it.
Something was going on with him, but I didn’t know what. And I didn’t think he would tell me, of all people, if I asked.
I was sitting beside Marie at the nurses’ station, charting on a critical patient that was just brought in via ambulance, when I glanced up to see Blake stepping out of the room after doing his assessment.
He walked up to where I was sitting. “We’re going to do a full workup.” His voice was quiet and tired-sounding.
I looked up at him and nodded, searching his eyes like I was going to find the answer to what was going on with him there. “Okay. Did you want X-ray to come down for a portable or do you think they’re good to be taken up?”
Before he could respond, Dr. Tomblin rounded the corner.
“Ah, just the people I was looking for,” she smiled as she approached the two of us.
She looked at me. “You should have your license in the next two to three weeks, so I’m in the process of getting everything set up for you so it’s all ready to go.
And I’m going to assign Dr. Pierson here to be your preceptor. ”
Blake and I slowly looked from her to each other. Beside me, I didn’t have to look to see Marie grinning with her back to Dr. Tomblin—the huff of quiet laughter she let out was more than enough to tell me.
“Um…are you sure I’m the best person to–”
“Of course I’m sure,” Dr. Tomblin interrupted. “You have the experience just like anyone else, and you two work well together. I just wanted to give you a heads up. I’ll make sure to go over everything with you and what you’ll need to do before and during taking her under your wing.”
Blake was already off-limits before because he was my brother’s best friend. At least, he was supposed to be off-limits.
Now, he was going to be my damn preceptor.