Chapter 13
Thirteen
R odney glanced at his watch after parking his car in the parking garage at the hospital.
He tried to look around and make sure he knew where he was. He hated these things. More often than not, he was thinking about where he was going and couldn’t even remember what level he was on, let alone what space he was in. There should be some way of the ticket containing that information.
Thinking about that, he grabbed the pen out of his pocket and wrote the information down. That way, he would know. He wasn’t sure how long he was going to be here. Just today? Would he stay with the twins? Would he go home and come back?
But the thing that he was most thinking about was Becky.
He was going to see Becky. Any minute. Possibly she could be walking in right now.
Although, he was guessing that she had taken her sister into surgery, and she would have needed to be there an hour or two early.
The surgery wasn’t scheduled until eight o’clock, and Rita had told Rodney that if he was there at 6:30, he should be able to see her before she went in.
They had promised that the babies would be available for them to see almost immediately after they were delivered, although the nurses and doctors would want to check them out.
Still, they knew what was going on, that Becky and Rodney were the de facto parents, and maybe it was because of Rita’s cancer, but they were giving them parental rights.
They would need to check in with the nurses’ station, but Rita had given Rodney all the information he needed.
He was early, thanks to Becky. He almost smiled, but he was too nervous.
Why was he nervous? He’d seen her on Monday. It wasn’t like this was the first time he’d seen her for years and years or anything.
He reached deep, going to the place where he went when he had an important business meeting. One where the future hinged on it, and he needed to succeed, sometimes against all odds.
He had been pretty good at being calm in high-pressure situations. But they didn’t include Becky. And she was more important than any business meeting. She was more important than billions of dollars; she was more important than anything.
He just hadn’t realized it. Or maybe he realized it, just hadn’t acted like it, and it was possible he lost her. That was where his nervousness was stemming from.
He walked into the hospital, following Rita’s directions and showing his ID at the nurses’ station.
He got the proper credentials and was given directions to the surgical waiting room.
They said that she had been prepped and moved to the last waiting point.
Becky was with her. Normally they only allowed one person per patient, but because of Rita’s unique situation, they were bending the rules just a bit.
He was going to see Becky.
He walked in, going to the third curtain, where he’d been directed. He looked again carefully, not wanting to pull the curtain on the wrong patient, and he saw Becky immediately.
In the bright lights of the hospital, with no heavy coat or hat on, she looked a lot different than she had on Monday.
First, he could see easily that her cheeks were much more sunken than they used to be. Her bones more prominent. Was that because she lost weight? Or because she’d matured beyond childhood and lost all the baby fat around her face?
He didn’t remember her with any extra fat. She’d always been skinny. Partially because of neglect, and partially because she couldn’t sit still for anything.
She was always into something, although the older she got, the more it was all good. He was the one who had struggled with the destructive habits and the sinful living.
But he never struggled with anything that had to do with relationships, because he wasn’t willing to risk losing Becky.
Even though they were never together. He was much too old for her, and that was part of the reason he left.
He was too old to be with her, so he figured he might as well go and have Ford Hansen teach him.
The problem was, the more time he spent earning money, the more time he wanted to spend.
The more he desired to earn more and more and what he had wasn’t enough.
He could see now it was a vicious cycle. An addiction of sorts.
Second, Becky looked older today. Her hair was longer and darker than he remembered. Maybe it was darker because of the winter. Still, her fingers clasped the hand of her sister. Rita’s eyes were closed, and she lay on the pillows, a tiny spot with a big bump right in the middle.
It looked like a peaceful scene. No one was fighting or throwing anything, and he wasn’t entirely sure that would be the case once Becky saw that he was there.
She looked calm now, but he knew she was a spitfire and an absolute tigress when she knew she was right.
In this instance, she was right. About everything.
He moved the curtain and stepped into the room.
“Good morning, ladies,” he said in his best and most charming voice.
Becky’s lips pressed closed, but then she shot a glance at her sister, and something that resembled a smile came over her face.
“Good morning, Rodney. It was nice of you to come.” She sounded sincere. He wasn’t expecting sincere. He wasn’t expecting her to be nice to him at all. Maybe that was what made the next words come out of his mouth.
“Yeah. I show up when I say I will.” He used the same, charming tone. But his words were obviously not kind or charming.
Why would he do that? Becky was being nice to him. And he didn’t want to fight in front of Rita. He didn’t want to fight at all. Yet with his words, he just said he did.
What was wrong with him?
“Becky told me her truck wouldn’t start. She traded it in on a car.” Rita’s words were slightly slurred.
“They gave her something to calm her,” Becky said softly.
“Why did you tell him that?” Rita said, and she didn’t sound like the happy, cheerful woman he’d met for supper last night.
Whatever it was had altered her personality. He didn’t like that, but he went around to the other side and pulled the chair closer.
Was it true? Had Becky really not been able to get there?
He almost told her that she could have texted him and let him know, but then he remembered that he changed his number. She had no way of getting a hold of him.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know,” he said, sincere.
But he could tell from her expression that his apology wasn’t what she wanted to hear. Or maybe it just didn’t matter. Still, her words were kind. “Of course. No problem.”
“Maybe we should exchange phone numbers now, because…if I would have had your number, I would have tried to contact you.”
He could tell from her expression that she wanted to deny him. To tell him that there was no need for him to have her number at all, but she did not. Instead, it was like she stretched her lips and made them settle into a smile.
“Of course. Whenever you’re ready.”
This was not the Becky he knew. This person was fake and only being kind because she had to. Was this the way they were going to parent together?
He supposed that he wouldn’t mind. Just being around her was…
so nice. It was so nice to be with her again.
He just wanted to breathe in her presence.
But he made a mess out of everything, and he owed her a huge explanation.
Not just about the fact that he ghosted her, blocked her, and ignored her for five years, but also about the fact that there might be a child that he fathered with someone else.
Who was he kidding? Becky would never take him now. Not after the five-year freezeout, along with the baby. Obviously, he hadn’t exorcised women from his life, just Becky.
She wasn’t going to understand. He might as well not even try.
He had gotten his phone out and nodded his head. She rattled off her number, and he typed it into his phone, putting Becky with a heart into his contacts.
It was silly and juvenile of him, but… Even after all this time, even after everything, he still loved her.
He could understand if she didn’t love him.
He deserved that, but he still loved her.
He loved her fierceness, and her tenacity, and even the way she was acting right now, where she would do anything for her sister, even be kind to the man she hated.
Her phone buzzed as he sent her a text. It was just a “hi.” He almost sent a heart, but she just would have been mad about it, and she wouldn’t have understood that it was a heart that came from his heart.
At least, he knew her really well. As well as someone could know someone five years ago.
“All right, Rita. They’re ready for you.
Go ahead and hug your loved ones goodbye.
As we mentioned, we have an observation window where they can watch.
They’ll be able to see the babies born. The doctors will hold them up, but then we’re going to close the window, because the cancer surgery will begin. ”
“Okay, I got that. When will we be able to see Rita again?” Becky gripped Rita’s hand in hers and stared at the nurse like she was a warrior in an enemy army.
“I’m sorry. I’m not sure. And the doctors themselves don’t know.
We haven’t been able to do the tests we need to do because of the babies.
But I can tell you that you should be able to hold the babies within an hour of their arrival.
The doctors will look them over, the nurses will clean them up, and if they need to be warmed, they’ll be under some lights.
But we’ll make sure that you two are as involved as possible.
Okay?” The nurse was cheerful and perky and way too happy for that hour of the morning and for Rodney’s mood in general, but he didn’t need to let the blackness in his heart ruin her day, so he smiled and nodded.