Chapter 8
The last memoryof my previous life fades away. I blink several times as Memnon comes back into view. His cheeks are soaked as though he’s been crying while reliving most of the past, and his hands tremble against my cheek.
“No.” The ragged word tears from his throat. His eyes search mine, his expression desolate. “No,” he says again, this time more broken.
Memnon’s legs give out, and his hands drop from my face as his knees hit the ground.
For several long seconds, all I hear is the sound of his heavy breathing as he bows his head, his hand pressed to his heart. I can feel the sharp blade of his grief through our bond, and I catch a few of his fragmented thoughts.
…watched her die…alone…protecting me…powerless… What have I done?
He makes a sound that is somewhere between a sob and a moan.
“Roxi,” he says quietly, his voice thick with anguish. He looks at me then, horror written all over his face. “What have I done?” he says, echoing his earlier thoughts.
I stare down at him dispassionately. “A lot, Memnon. You’ve done a lot.”
He draws in a shuddering breath. “You died.”
“I did.”
“You were alone in the palace when they came—” His voice breaks off, and he rubs his eyes. “My mother, my sister—” He presses his lips together, and his expression nearly crumbles again. “You and Ferox had to fight your way out alone.”
Memnon bows his head again and covers his eyes with his hand, and the man who has done so much and felt so little now weeps, overcome with emotion.
“Eislyn…you had warned me about her. I didn’t listen. She almost…she destroyed everything. If you hadn’t…” He draws in a shuddering breath. “If you hadn’t placed the curse—if you hadn’t given your life…” His voice breaks on that word. “I would’ve surely been damned to some awful fate. Instead, you did something miraculous. You bought us another life together.”
I gaze down at him as the shadows around Slain Maiden’s Meadow grow longer and darker.
“I see everything now,” he says. “I understand. I punished the one person who tried to save my wretched life. My best friend and soul mate, the love of my life. I have treated you like an enemy and made you hate me, and I relished it all in the name of vengeance. But this whole time you were my savior.” He turns his face up, his glittering eyes rising to mine. “I’m sorry, est amage. It is not enough, but I am sorry.”
I study him for several moments, and then I do something I didn’t think I was capable of doing, given all that Memnon has so recently done to me: I reach out and wipe away his tears. The action makes him close his eyes tightly, and a few more unbidden tears slip out.
I’ve only seen this man cry a precious few times, and the sight of him broken and vulnerable twists my gut.
Memnon catches one of my hands and cups it between his. “I have committed too many evils against you to repair with a few simple words or actions. They will never be enough to repay the debt I owe you. There is only one thing I can offer you.”
Still kneeling, Memnon unsheathes his gold-hilted dagger from his side. I tense at the sight of it, my palm still stinging from the memory of that blade cutting through my flesh last night when I made my unbreakable oath.
Memnon offers up his own healed palm, and faster than I can follow, he slices it open once more.
“What are you doing?” I ask, alarmed.
His smoky eyes are steady on mine as he says, “With blood I bind, with bone I break. Only in death shall I at last forsake.”
Birds take flight from the trees around us as he finishes, “Your bidding be done, under moon and sun. My will is yours until your heart is won.”