26. Chapter 26
Chapter 26
Beau
I stepped into the office of Suchitra Pillai, the lawyer who had represented Asha. The space was elegant yet understated—modern, with clean lines and warm wooden accents. Bookshelves lined the walls, stacked with thick legal volumes, while a few framed photographs on the corner of her desk—likely of her family—offered the only personal touch. Aside from that, the room was pure professionalism.
Suchitra herself was a tall, confident woman in her mid-forties, with sharp Indian features, softened by a quiet grace. Her dark hair was tied back neatly, and she wore a navy suit that spoke of precision and control. She greeted me with a firm handshake, her expression unreadable.
"Mr. Bodine." She gestured for me to take a seat.
"Please call me Beau. May I call you Suchitra?" I settled into a client chair facing her.
"You may." She folded her arms and looked at me. "You're the father."
I raised both eyebrows. "Yes."
She smiled. "Asha and I were friends. Well, we used to be friends…or whatever you could be with Asha. She didn't get close to people—didn't let them near her."
I smiled uneasily. "I'm afraid I didn't know Asha very well."
"She told me you wouldn't want to have anything to do with a child," she remarked. "I tried to convince her to talk to you, but once Asha made up her mind…she wouldn't change it."
This was all news to me, but if Asha was that much of a hard ass, no way had Mira manipulated her into becoming Pari's guardian.
"Since you're here, I'm assuming that Mira took my advice and reached out to you."
I narrowed my eyes. "Yes, she did."
Suchitra sighed. "Good. Those parents of hers were making a nuisance of themselves. Complaints to CPS until they finally told them to back off. Freaking Mira out by sending legal documents to her, and when they sent a lawyer over who told her she'd lose custody, I thought she needed to contact the father. Even if you didn't want Pari, you could help shut her parents down."
I'd done the exact opposite.
"I met Anil and Seema Sen. They…they told me that Mira had hurt Pari when she was a baby."
A laugh escaped Suchitra. "Mira? Hurting anyone? Right!"
"I believed them," I added.
Her eyes clouded with pain. "Damn it! I should've thought about that. Her parents come across as such pillars of society. In Atlanta, everyone thinks they're such good people…and Mira is the…anyway. You shouldn't believe anything they say."
"What can you tell me about all this? Legally, I mean."
Suchitra shrugged. "Everything. Asha gave me permission to talk to you if you ever showed up. I insisted. She never thought you would, so it was an easy get for me."
I nodded, my throat tight. "I spoke with a Kush Patel at CPS. He said…he said that CPS would never let Mira's parents get custody of a child. Can you tell me why that is?"
Suchitra straightened and placed her fingertips on her desk, her gaze steady. "I can see what you suspect."
I was just a little too late in forming my suspicions, and very late in having them verified.
She gave me a sad smile. "Asha and Mira's childhood shaped them. Some of this is going to be difficult to hear, but it's important that you get the full picture."
I shifted in my seat, angry with myself, at the fucking world. I nodded for her to continue.
"Asha and Mira," she began, "were victims of sexual abuse by their father, Anil Sen."
I stared at her. My whole body clenched. I couldn't breathe as I tried to process what I'd just heard. It was one thing to speculate, quite another to have someone tell me.
It felt like the room had shifted around me, like the air had been sucked out. My mind spiraled. I leaned forward, my elbows on her desk, hands clasped together. "When…when did it start?" My voice was shaky.
"Asha was eight. It stopped when she turned fourteen."
I paled, looking up at the lawyer. "Why did it stop?" But I knew the answer. Mira was five years younger than Asha.
Suchitra pursed her lips and kept her face straight. "Asha hadn't told anyone. She'd tried with Seema, but she blamed Asha for it, saying she needed to stop lying and prancing around. Like Asha at eight was some Jezebel."
"And Mira?"
The lawyer smiled, and then it wavered. "She's a fighter, our Mira. She complained but Anil is an influential man in Atlanta. He made sure there wasn't even an investigation. The case worker who came to their home told Mira to behave herself or she'd be sent to an orphanage. After a few years, I think Mira wanted to go to an orphanage. Asha felt guilty for not protecting her sister—for feeling relieved that she didn't have to…. Anyway. She thought it would stop like it had for Asha, but it didn't."
"No one knew?"
The lawyer shook her head. "Asha only told me when she knew she was dying."
I felt bile rise within me. I looked around.
Suchitra pointed to a door. "Bathroom is through there."
I walked in, closed the door behind me, and threw up into the toilet. I felt like I was drowning. The puzzle pieces were clicking into place—Asha's protectiveness, Mira's guarded nature, even the way they had both kept me at arm's length at times. It all made sense, but it also made everything hurt more. I hadn't seen it. I hadn't wanted to. My pulse roared in my ears as I pictured young Asha and Mira trapped in that nightmare. Asha and Mira who looked like Pari.
It took me a good fifteen minutes to get my shit together.
Suchitra gave me a glass of water when I returned, and then cocked an eyebrow. "Would you like something stronger?"
"Sure." I'd just emptied my stomach, but I needed a hit to calm my nerves. What a fucking joke. The great Beau Bodine, the righteous son of a bitch, didn't have the stomach or nerves to hear about the wrongs committed against the woman he loved— the same one he'd unceremoniously kicked out of his home and life. The one he'd broken by separating her from her daughter.
Suchitra pulled out a bottle of Lagavulin from a drawer, along with two glasses. She poured a finger in each.
We raised our drinks and clinked them together.
Once we'd taken a few soothing sips of Scotch, Suchitra's voice stayed steady as she continued, "The trauma they endured had long-lasting effects, as you can imagine—especially since neither of them sought help. Asha got some therapy, Mira didn't even have that. Sexual abuse took their innocence away but also their confidence."
No wonder Mira always seemed afraid that she wouldn't be accepted, that she wasn't good enough.
"Asha chose Mira as Pari's guardian because she knew that her sister would fight with her life to protect her daughter. She was so afraid that her father would get his hands on Pari—they both were."
I remembered Mira on her knees, her hands clasped together in front of her, pleading.
"Please, Beau. Please, I'm begging you. Never leave her alone with my parents. Promise me that. Just that, and I'll go away. You'll never have to see me again."
"The abuse left Asha scarred, emotionally and psychologically. She struggled with trust, with intimacy, with letting people in," Suchitra continued. "Mira coped differently. She took care of people—she worked in a diner, cooked. When Asha fell sick, she was there for her sister. She was there to wash her, clean her, she was there for every time Asha threw up, and by the end, Mira was changing Asha's diapers, and doing the same for Pari."
I tried to swallow, but my mouth was dry. My hands shook as I clenched them into fists on my lap, trying to keep the anger and pain from boiling over. "I didn't know about any of this. Mira never told me. If she had…." I'd have fucking killed her father with my bare hands. I was probably going to do that anyway, now that I knew. That asshole would rue the day he lied to me, made me hurt Mira.
Suchitra's expression softened just slightly, the first crack in her stoic demeanor. "She probably couldn't. Sharing that kind of trauma—especially when it's never been properly dealt with—is not easy. And it's likely she didn't think anyone would believe her. For years, Mira was taught to hide her pain. Even as an adult, she lived with that conditioning."
Suchitra's words rattled in my head. She didn't think anyone would believe her.
I hadn't . I, who knew her, hadn't. I'd been taken in by the image her parents presented. I'd done to her what everyone else had…no, I'd done worse . I'd taken her away from her child. I'd taken her away from the man she loved—I knew she was in love with me. I'd felt it every day and night.
I remembered asking her when we'd had sex for the first time, "Darlin', this isn't your first time, is it?"
She'd stiffened, and I hadn't liked that at all. Her eyes had gone from arousal to panic. And I had wondered, had she had a bad sexual initiation ?
All the evidence had been staring me in the face, but I'd refused to see anything but my own needs, my own ego.
Suchitra leaned slightly forward, her tone gentle and firm. "Asha was very clear in her will. She wrote letters for the court and CPS, if the occasion ever arose, that her parents could never be trusted with Pari."
I was grateful that I hadn't let those terrible people anywhere near Pari. The only thing that had stopped me was Mira begging me not to. But for that, I would've let their shadow fall on my daughter. I wouldn't have protected Pari.
"Beau," Suchitra probed, "Mira, despite her own trauma, stepped into the role of protector. Her parents have been trying to undermine her ever since Asha's death."
I was numb. It felt like my world was collapsing around me, crumbling brick by brick. I had believed the worst about Mira. I had believed her parents—the very people who had shattered her and Asha.
I hated myself.
I stood abruptly, unable to sit any longer. "My lawyers will keep in touch with you, just so we protect…continue to protect Pari."
Suchitra got up as well. "How's Mira doing?"
How was she doing? She was probably shattered, picking up the pieces somewhere.
"She'll be fine," I assured her. Will she, Beau? After what she went through, did she need the extra trauma you decided to throw her way?
Suchitra folded her arms. "Meaning, she isn't now?"
My confession poured out of me, bitter on my tongue. "I believed her parents, and kicked her out. I need to find her and make this right. I will."
"Please, let me know how it goes. I've tried to reach her but…her phone is disconnected or something."
"She had a burner phone." Did she have enough minutes for when I'd try to find her now? Why didn't I give her some money when I kicked her out? Fuck, she wouldn't have taken it anyway. She even left the phone I got her. "I'll contact you as soon as I know how she is."
Because I didn't know right now, and it was killing me.
"You take care of yourself and Pari…and Mira. Those two girls deserve the best of everything. You need anything from me, all you have to do is call."
"Thank you." My voice was tight; I was barely holding it together.
I walked out of the office, feeling very much like I was sinking into quicksand and couldn't find a way out. The world outside felt harsh, the sunlight too bright, the air too thick.
As the driver took me to the helipad, my mind raced with everything I'd just learned. I'd pushed Mira away when she needed me the most. How the hell had I let this happen?
I was just about to get into the helicopter when my phone rang. I pulled it from my pocket, my heart already heavy, and glanced at the screen.
It was Katya. She was on my mother's side on this, and I didn't want to deal with her, but I worried something was wrong with a family member so I answered, "What?"
"Beau," her voice came through, tense and urgent. "Where are you?"
"Atlanta."
"Get back right away."
I gritted my teeth. "Who's hurt?"
There was a pause. "Mira. She's in the ICU, here at Memorial Health. And…it's not looking good."
My heart stopped.
"What the fuck happened?" I demanded, my voice thick with panic.
"She…she overdosed."
" What ? On what?"
"Ambien. It was…the medics said it was her sister's prescription."
Did she take too many pills by accident? Or…what?
"She attempted suicide, Beau." Katya sounded like she was in pain.
Oh God! My Mira tried to kill herself, because of what I did. Because I tore her away from the one person in her life—Pari. Because I treated her like trash.
"Are you her doctor?"
"No."
"Good, keep it that way. I don't want you or Mama near her. Got it?"
"Beau, I'd never hurt Mira," Katya said, affronted.
"I think we've hurt her enough. Your animosity and Mama's meddling…fucking hell, Katya. I did this to her."
She stayed silent, not replying. She'd been happy when Mira was sent away—everyone had, except for Nova, who called me an idiot for thinking Mira could ever hurt a fly. Roxy and Nova were the only two people in my life who had never wavered in how they felt about Mira.
"I don't know what to say," Katya said softly. "The medics said that she kept asking for Pari, asking if…Pari was sleeping."
"I'll be there," I barked and ended the call. "How fast can you get me to Memorial Health in Savannah?" I asked the pilot.
"Let's find out," the pilot said. Soon after, the helicopter blades roared to life above me.
I pressed my fists into my eyes because what I really wanted to do was bawl.
Mira.
My Mira could die. I'd failed her spectacularly. And now I didn't even know if I'd ever get the chance to make it right.