23. Chapter 23
Chapter 23
Stella
" S weet, it's just a few hours," Noah tried to reassure me the best he could.
I looked out of the car window as he drove us to my father's house. He'd thought I'd freak out when I saw the invitation; he hadn't expected me to laugh as hysterically as I did. It wasn't a good or clean laugh, either.
I was losin' my ever-lovin’ mind!
Their invitation was so full of shit.
Senator Baron Hunt he stayed controlled, even pleasant.
"Whatever." Yeah, that was super mature of me. I sounded like a nasty teenager, nasal waspishness included.
"The governor is going to be there," Noah reminded me.
"I know. Daddy and Whit texted me fifteen times since this morning to let me know that I shouldn't embarrass them. Like I'm going to take my clothes off and dance naked on a table," I muttered.
Noah chuckled. "I'd give good money to see that."
"Maybe I'll call myself a slut, and you can record it," I retorted sharply.
He fell silent.
Damn it! This was not who I was. I wasn't a bitter person, or rather, I used to not be one. I was a forget-and-forgive sort of gal. I gave people second, third, fifth, and tenth chances.
"I'm sorry," I mumbled.
He put his hand on mine, which was resting on my thigh. "No apologies. I fucked up. I did you wrong. You don't need to feel bad about letting me know the damage I did."
"So, what you're saying is that I can be a waspish cunt?"
"If that's what you want."
I pushed his hand off of me. "Fucking hell, Noah." And then gave into frustration and just screamed .
"Feeling better?" Noah asked after I was done with my horror-movie heroine cry.
I couldn't help it. I let a small laugh out. "Right this moment? Yeah."
"Maybe you should do it a lot more."
"Scream?"
"Let it all out," he suggested and took my hand in his again. "You're my fiancée at this shindig; you don't have to wear a mask. You don't have to pretend to be a goody-two-shoes if you don't want to."
"Is that what you thought I was?"
"No, Stella, I thought you were a spoiled waspish cunt, which is how I could so thoroughly fuck up your life. You are a kind and sweet person."
"Were," I corrected.
"No, baby, you still are," he crooned, "but you're angry as hell, which is absolutely understandable."
"What are you saying?"
"Fuck what your father said about behavin' yourself, whatever the hell that means. Just be you. Be whoever you want to be."
"What if I want to be…I don't know, like Miranda Priestly?"
He was quiet for a long moment. "Who's that?"
"God, Noah, your pop culture knowledge is shit."
"Don't I know it. So, who is this Miranda person?"
I explained Devil Wears Prada to him. "Her passive-aggressive term was ‘that's all’, and then she'd throw her designer fur coat around her shoulders, and walk away like a diva."
"It's too fucking hot for a coat, Sweet, but I can give you my suit jacket to throw around if you wanna play diva," he teased.
This was the Noah I fell in love with. Charming, fun, and funny. Smart and witty. Honest and sexy as sin.
He'd been this way the entire time we were together…until he wasn't.
Once he left his car keys with the valet, he held his arm out for me. I waited an infinitesimal second before holding on to him.
"What are we doing, Noah?" I whispered.
He patted my hand. "We're trying to live, Sweet."
"Weren't we always living?" I asked as we took the stairs up to the open front door of the opulent house.
"Not me. I've been dyin' since I hurt you."
"Noah?" My eyes filled with tears. He dropped a kiss on my lips.
"We're going to have fun tonight," he said softly, and smiled at me. "So, no tears."
"I don't know how to have fun."
He licked my cheek where a tear had fallen. "Let's learn together."
He slid his lips over mine, and in that moment, the world stopped spinning. I let him inside my mouth, and tentatively touched his tongue with mine. He groaned softly, his hands on my hip squeezing as if he were holding himself in check.
"Well, look at the couple in love," Whitney sneered.
Noah took his time nuzzling his lips against mine as if he hadn't heard my stepmother, and then he kissed my nose. "Let's show them who we really are."
I had no idea what that meant because I didn't know who I was anymore. This man, who was with me right now, was the man I loved. But it made me feel like a pathetic person to let him in, allow him access to me after what he'd done.
"We are in love." I smiled, leaning into Noah. I didn't even have to pretend this time. I just needed to pretend the ugliness never happened, and that this was real. I could do that for a few hours.
"We certainly are," Noah murmured, his eyes on mine.
There was raw honesty in how he looked at me, and I felt a flutter of fear, and then another, until I was sure I was going to have a full-blown panic attack.
"Noah, Stella, I'm glad you got here a little early," my father boomed. He came up to me and kissed my cheek perfunctorily. "You cleaned up nicely."
"Baron shut the fuck up," Noah said coolly, "my fiancée looks absolutely stunning."
Baron quirked an eyebrow. "It's just us here, Carter. You don't have to play doting fiancé."
"Who says I'm playin'?" Noah kissed the side of my head.
I'd never had anyone stand up for me against my father and his wife. I had to confess, it felt damn good, even if Noah was laying it on a bit too thick. Any second now, I'd hear the violins.
My father ignored Noah and focused on me, his lips curled in a snarl. "Stella, just don't fuck up tonight and—"
"Baron, again , shut the fuck up," Noah glared at him. "You don't talk to Stella like that."
"Excuse me?" My father never backed down from a fight; that's what made him a good politician. He would dive headfirst into every battle he encountered. "Whatever fantasy you have concocted about what's happening between y'all, I know the truth and—"
"You know fuck all, Daddy." I leaned into Noah. "Fucking fuck all." I wish I'd had a shot of vodka or tequila because this would go down so much smoother with some alcohol.
"Young woman, mind your language."
"Why?" Noah demanded.
"Now, Baron, let's not…come on, Stella, Noah, let's get inside." Whitney stepped in to prevent World War III. "We have the garden set up. It's such a beautiful evening."
As we walked, I giggled softly, and when Noah turned to look at me, I mumbled, "This is fun. Can we do some more of it?"
"Yeah, let's."
It was fun.
In public, my father played the doting parent, and Whitney, the happy mother of the bride-to-be. I was told by more than one jealous socialite what a great catch Noah was and that the video, which was obviously scandalous, also showed what a banging sex life I had with my fiancé.
I stood with a glass of champagne, watching Noah talk to the governor and his wife, not caring even a little bit that the partygoers were all talking about the video and speculating about the rushed engagement.
"Stella." The nails on a chalkboard voice of Shawn Harding greeted me.
Shawn was a lawyer at one of the most prominent Georgia law firms. His client roster included top politicians and influential businessmen from all over the country. Baron Hunt had also handpicked him to be my boyfriend. The relationship had lasted four months, a month more than it should've.
"Shawn." I sipped champagne, wanting very much to run to Noah. It was a strange world where I wanted to escape the man who had physically abused me to be protected by the one who had emotionally violated me. My choices sucked.
"Noah Carter, now I must say that's one hell of a coup…especially for someone like—"
"Oh my God, Shawn Harding, how are you?" Luna, who seemed to have come barreling from nowhere, interrupted my ex.
"Luna…hello." Shawn had probably not expected such a welcome from Luna Steele, who was as famous for her cold shoulder as she was for being a tomboy.
I never told Luna what happened between Shawn and me, but then my friend was more perceptive than most people gave her credit for. She knew something had gone wrong with Shawn—something so terrible that she had insisted I talk to Dr. Ryan about it. I wasn't able for a couple of years. Abuse and shame were close bedfellows—and I was highly familiar with the twin emotions.
Luna put an arm around me. "You look so beautiful, Stell." She kissed my cheek. "And Noah looks good enough to eat. He is the hottest man in Savannah, and that's sayin' something."
She was overdoing it, which was adorable. And since Noah had recommended I have fun, I decided, why the hell not? A girl who was faking it the way I was, could go all the way and fake some irresponsible joy.
"He is, and he's all mine," I exaggerated. I showed Shawn my ring. "Isn't it gorgeous? It's a blue daisy."
"Noah has such great taste," Luna continued to play it up. I think we both enjoyed watching Shawn squirm. "But then he grabbed you off the market so that's pretty obvious. Didn't you and Shawn date for a hot minute?"
Shawn looked at me derisively. "I broke it off with her."
"Which was tremendously lucky for me," I heard Noah say from behind me. He wrapped his arms around me, his hands on my stomach, his chest against my back. He kissed my ear. "Baby, I wish we could get out of here soon."
Okay, that was even a bit too much for me.
He rocked his hips against mine, and I gasped. He was aroused. How the hell was he excited? How the hell was I?
The chemistry between us had been potent from the start, which was probably why that “video was hotter than a summer day in Savannah,” according to one of the grand dames who congratulated me on my engagement and stud of a fiancé.
"Carter," Shawn said tightly.
He had expected to corner me alone like he had when we were together. He hadn't expected Luna and Noah to be there for me, protecting me. The truth was, neither had I.
Is this what I'd been missing by keeping my shields up? By not letting anyone close?
"Harding, man, how are you?" Gabe thumped my ex on his back. Aurora winked at me as she stood next to her husband.
"Rhodes. Aurora." Shawn looked around at the circle that had formed around me. My own defense perimeter.
"I'm sorry to hear you lost that case for the speaker of the house," Gabe continued. In the business world, they called him “Angry Rhodes.” He knew how to cut you off at the knees, and walk over you as you bled, while keeping his shoes clean.
"Ah…you win some, and you—"
"Speaker Kellerman has it in for you," Gabe continued. "I had lunch with him last week, and he's fuckin' furious. You should settle that shit before he sinks your law firm."
Shawn had not expected such a full-frontal attack from Gabe.
"I think I know how to manage my law firm, Rhodes," Shawn bit out.
"Apparently not if you're losing cases for one of the most influential men in the state," Gabe grinned at him. "Is that enough humiliation, or do you want to stay here longer? I can't imagine why you thought you could come here after what you pulled."
"What? What the fuck has this bitch been—"
"You want to be very careful how you talk about the future Mrs. Carter." Noah straightened. "You say one derogatory word, and the Speaker will be the least of your problems, Harding, 'cause I'll fuck you up."
"You lying about me now, Stella?" Shawn, who had the intelligence of a twerp, yelled at me.
A lot of heads turned toward us.
Luna arrogantly turned and snapped her fingers at one of my father's security detail, who was already walking toward us to see what the commotion was about. "Could you remove this gentleman? I think he's had too much to drink," she whispered loudly.
"I…what the…." Shawn was flustered.
"This is fun, Noah," I chuckled.