Chapter 21
CHAPTER 21
BECKETT
I t took him less than half the ride home to realize he’d fucked up. But he was still feeling too damn raw to risk turning the car around and heading back to the club.
Even more raw when he stepped into his silent, empty home. Pain lanced at his chest, and for the first time in years he found himself missing the sound of someone else in his space. The peace he’d once made with his solitude had been stripped from him by a pretty girl with too-expressive eyes.
Fuck.
Tomorrow. He’d call Ruby tomorrow, apologize for being an asshole, and maybe they could go back to being friends who sometimes flirted across the bar.
Because he was self-aware enough to realize that he’d fucked up because he’d let himself get in too deep with her. Attraction had turned to infatuation and was quickly heading toward something much deeper.
And far more dangerous.
Definitely better for both of them that they’d realized so early on they weren’t a good fit. At least, that was what he tried to tell himself as he poured a second glass of whiskey and sat brooding in front of his empty fireplace. But no matter how much he lectured himself that she obviously wasn’t right for him, he couldn’t seem to shake the itch between his shoulder blades that was telling him to get back in his car and go make things right.
He was contemplating a third drink when his phone—which he’d been holding in his hand for reasons that had nothing to do with wondering if Ruby would call—alerted him to someone on the front steps.
Ruby.
His heart, the traitor that it was, literally leapt as he watched her shift from foot to foot on the screen. At one point, she reached for the doorbell, only to snatch her hand away at the last second and pace to the edge of the steps and back.
“Just fucking do it,” she mumbled, giving herself a fully body shake.
God, she was adorable, standing there all disgruntled, glaring at his doorbell like it had personally offended her mother. He was tempted to pull the same trick he had earlier and give her a little scare from his phone. But he’d already been enough of an asshole for one night.
Probably.
Deciding to put her out of her misery, he set his glass aside and rose from his chair to make his way to the front door. He opened it just as Ruby reached for the doorbell again. “Something I can help you with, Ruby Red?”
He had to swallow a laugh as she jumped back, slapping a hand over her heart and glaring at him. “What the fuck, dude? Are you psychic or something?”
Without answering, he simply held up his phone, which clearly showed the two of them on the video. “Or something.”
“Right. That stupid doorbell.” Huffing out an annoyed breath, she tugged her jacket tighter around her. “Can we talk?”
Stepping to the side, he gestured for her to come in. She swept past him with her head held high, as regal as any lady of the court, and he had to fight back another chuckle as he closed the door behind her.
Was it any wonder he’d been falling for her? He’d always been a sucker for a woman with some fire in her, and his Ruby had plenty to spare.
Not yours, remember?
Right.
Fuck.
He turned to find her standing in his entryway, her arms still crossed and her chin tilted up with that hint of defiance he so enjoyed stripping from her.
“I owe you an apology,” he said without giving her a chance to rip into him.
Ruby blinked, and he had the satisfaction of watching the defiance fade for just a moment before she seemed to remember herself. “Yes. Yes, you do. You were out of line.”
“I was. We negotiated very clear lines for our relationship, and I crossed those lines. I’m sorry.”
“Apology accepted.” Looking adorably uncertain, she did that little dance again, shifting from one foot to another. “I’m not going to apologize.”
“I wouldn’t expect you to. You didn’t do anything wrong.”
If he’d expected that to mollify her, he’d clearly miscalculated. Throwing her hands in the air, she paced away from him, then back, her agitation showing in every jerky movement. “Then why did you jump my ass like that back at the club if you know I didn’t do anything wrong?”
How much to tell her? He wasn’t quite ready to rip open those old wounds, and he wasn’t sure he ever would be.
But he owed her some kind of explanation. “We all have our hot buttons. Some are hotter than others. One of mine is seeing people I care about working themselves to death.”
“It’s not that simple. You—” As if catching herself before she said something she shouldn’t, she rolled her lips together and shook her head.
“What?”
She looked away, and everything about her seemed to tense up as if she was expecting some kind of negative reaction. “Nothing. You wouldn’t understand.”
“Ruby. Eyes on me.”
Maybe it wasn’t fair to put that hint of Daddy in his tone when she was standing there, looking so goddamn vulnerable. And he half expected her to call him on it, but she slowly shifted her gaze back to his. “Sir?”
Fuck , he was a sucker for that soft, submissive tone. “Thank you for listening. Now, please tell me whatever it is you’re trying so hard to hold back. Because from where I’m standing, all I see is someone I care about, a good friend being reckless as hell with her safety. So if there’s more to it, explain it to me. I want to understand.” And it surprised him how true that was. He should be sending her on her way, with a mutual understanding that they obviously weren’t a good match.
But he couldn’t bring himself to say the words. To watch her leave, knowing this may well have been the last chance he had to learn more about the adorable, sassy bartender with the big sad eyes.
“You can’t understand,” she said with a jerk of her shoulder. “Unless you’ve been in my shoes, working multiple jobs just to make ends meet and maybe, maybe have a spare twenty bucks to put in a savings account at the end of the month that you’ll probably have to spend anyway because your car broke down or you had to go to the doctor or any one of a dozen other unexpected expenses pops up out of nowhere, you can’t understand. And I can’t explain it to you.”
Everything in him wanted to tell her she didn’t have to worry. That Daddy would take care of her. But as much as he wanted to do exactly that, he knew without saying the words that his offer wouldn’t be welcome. “You’re right. I’ve never been in that position, and I have no idea what it’s like. But that doesn’t stop me from worrying about you when you tell me you sacrificed your one day off a month, and then you turn around and work what? Eighteen hours in a row? It doesn’t stop me from noticing the bags under your eyes or how fucking exhausted you looked back at the club.”
“I know. I… appreciate that you care.”
“But?”
The corners of her lips lifted in a sad smile. “ But , I can’t let you have control over that part of my life, Beckett. I did that once and it nearly destroyed me.”
His heart cracked at the pain in her voice. “Will you tell me about him?”
Cocking her head to the side, she studied him. “Will you tell me about her? I assume there’s a ‘her’ behind that hot button of yours.”
“Maybe. Not tonight.” Not ever, if he could manage it. No matter how that little voice in his head insisted she deserved to know. That they couldn’t keep dancing around their pasts like this.
“Fair enough. Maybe I’ll tell you about him. But not tonight.”
That should be the end of it. But he found himself pulled toward her, like a magnet seeking its mate. She was his complete opposite in every possible way, but he was drawn to her in ways he couldn’t explain. Closing the gap between them, he lifted a hand to her cheek. “I should make you go home. Get some sleep.”
She raised a brow in that sassy way she had that made him want to spank her or fuck her, he never was quite sure. “Make me?”
“Mmhmm.”
“Didn’t we just have a fight about you trying to make me do things I don’t want to do?”
“Touché, Ruby Red. But you had a long day and you need your rest.”
“I need you more.”
Fuck. How the hell was he supposed to say no to that? “All right. You can stay.”
“Thank god. Take me to bed, Bex.”
Shifting his hold on her, his fingers digging ever so slightly into the soft skin of her cheeks, he forced her head back. “That reminds me. Your little nickname seems to be catching on at the club.”
“Oh?” Sheer delight danced in her eyes. “What a shame.”
“Hmm. It is a shame. For you.”
“And why is that?”
“Because every time I catch someone calling me ‘Bex’, it’s your ass that’s going to pay the price. Starting tonight.”
Releasing his hold on her, he scooped her up over his shoulder, landing a hard swat to her upturned ass while she shrieked in protest. “No fair! I didn’t know that was a rule!”
“Ask me if I care about being fair, Ruby Red.”
“Bastard.”
“Tsk tsk. Keep up the name calling and I’ll show you how much of a bastard I can really be, little girl.”
In his room, he placed her on her feet as he settled on the edge of his bed. Her cheeks were flushed with a mixture of righteous fury and excitement, the deep brown of her eyes burning with it.
The caregiver side of him wanted nothing more than to tuck her into bed so she could get plenty of rest. It was late, and they both needed to be up early.
But those other parts of him needed to see her submit, even if it was just for a moment. So he looked closely for the exhaustion he’d seen in her earlier, but for now at least she looked more than capable of handling whatever he threw at her.
Good.
“This really isn’t fair, Sir.”
Keeping his gaze locked with hers, he took his time unbuttoning and rolling his sleeves to his elbow. It didn’t escape his notice that her attention kept drifting to his arms before she snapped it back. Every now and then, her tongue would dart out, wetting her lips.
Adorable. Impossibly sexy. And all his.
At least for tonight.
“Why are you getting spanked, Ruby?” Despite this being a playful punishment, he put a bit of steel behind the words. Just enough to make her squirm, which she did, much to his delight.
“Because you’re an unreasonable?—”
Holding up a hand, he cut her off. “Let me stop you right there, little girl. One more disrespectful word out of you, and you will be going to bed with a sore bottom both inside and out. As luck would have it, there is a large, fresh chunk of ginger sitting in my fridge and I’d be all too happy to repurpose it. Now. Why are you being spanked?”
Her sharp intake of breath was accompanied by her pupils going dark with need. “Because you can’t take a fucking joke, Bex .”
So, she wanted to play the brat, did she?
Very well. He was more than happy to play with her.
Rising to his feet again, he wrapped a hand around the back of her neck, watching in amusement as the first flickers of fear danced in her eyes. “My naughty, naughty girl. Now Daddy’s really going to have to punish you.”
Ruby
Oh, shit. She’d definitely pushed him too far.
The playful smirk he’d been wearing was still in place, but it had taken on a hard edge that matched the steel in his gaze.
But despite all that—or, if she was being honest, probably because of it—need flared to life between her thighs. And she couldn’t resist poking him just a little bit more because of it.
“You don’t have to do anything, you know,” she said, flashing him a sassy smile.
“Oh, but I do. How else will my naughty girl learn where the lines are so she can keep crossing them every chance she gets?”
Her heart tripped painfully in her chest. How did he always seem to know exactly the right thing to say? This wasn’t about punishing her because he couldn’t stand to be disrespected, or to force her compliance.
He would punish her, yes. But he was making it clear he not only expected her to continue being a brat and breaking the rules, but he welcomed it.
Dangerous, dangerous man.
“Before we get started, is ginger a limit for you?”
“No, Daddy.” Anything anal was usually off limits to her play partners but, well, he wasn’t her usual play partner, either.
He was Daddy.
“Come on, then, naughty girl. To the kitchen with you.”
Taking her by the arm, he guided her out of the bedroom. And straight to an empty corner in his kitchen.
“You’re going to stand here, with your bare bottom on display while you wait for Daddy to punish you.” As he lectured, he undid her jeans and tugged them to her knees, along with her panties before turning her to face the wall. “Hands behind your head, little girl.”
Ugh, she hated being treated like a naughty child. “Do I really have to stand in the corner?”
“Yes. You refused to accept your punishment like a big girl, so you’ve lost the right to be treated like one.”
Biting back a groan, she pressed her legs together against another flash of need. “Yes, Daddy.”
“Good girl. Stand right here and don’t move until Daddy tells you to.”