Chapter 28
JULIA
T he nostalgic familiarity of her old home couldn’t ease the burden she carried in her heart. Every footstep on the old hardwood floors echoed with a mix of memories of a life she once lived there. A life she would live again.
Would it be that bad?
Her sister rubbed a hand up and down her back before she slipped her arms around her and squeezed her tight. “Oh, Julia, it is so good to have you back in this house.”
“I was just here yesterday.”
“To pick up your raincoat. But having you stay here. Sleep here again. I’m the happiest woman in the world.”
Julia squeezed her sister back, trying to drink in her happiness and let it fill her. Her mind whirled, though. Her heart ached for her former family. How was Sierra faring? And would Lydia retaliate?
Maybe she could reach out to her stepdaughter. Would Sierra be just as angry at her as Grant, though?
“Now, I think you should head up to your room to rest. Or…we can settle on the couch…watch some movies?” Alicia grinned at her.
“Uh, I’m going to lie down, actually.” She couldn’t stomach a movie marathon with her sister. It reminded her of all the movie marathons with Grant after her hospitalizations. She needed a minute.
“Okay, sure. If you need anything, just give me a holler. And maybe later we can do a rom-com marathon?”
“Sure,” Julia said, forcing a smile onto her face.
The door opened behind her as she stepped onto the first step. Luke strode into the house, carrying a duffel bag.
“Hey, glad you could come,” Alicia said.
“Yeah, of course.”
Why was Luke carrying a bag? Was he staying? Her stomach twisted into a knot as she spotted the full-court press that was about to happen. Her sister was trying desperately to recreate the familiarity of her past. The foursome in the living room watching movies and sharing a meal.
But her heart wasn’t ready for it. Not yet. She continued up the stairs without a word to him and sniffled as she fought the tears that stung her eyes. The floodgates opened as she pushed into her old room. It remained unchanged.
That both soothed her and made her all the more upset. She sucked in breaths, desperately trying to control her emotions. She had been confused, but she hadn’t expected things to end like this.
She wiped at her tears, trying to sort through everything. She’d have to get her things from New Orleans. She wondered if she could avoid it. Could she tell them to burn her things when they cleaned out her apartment? Why not?
She didn’t want to go back to the city that held so many memories of her current life. A life she’d have to leave behind before she was ready.
She wondered if they’d sort out the mess with DG Industries and Lydia.
Her tears slowed as memories of the woman ripped through her. Maybe it would be better to be away from the mess.
A knock sounded, pulling her thoughts away from her former life and centering them back with her family.
“Just a second!” she called as she raced to the mirror and wiped at her cheeks.
The door popped open before she was ready. Alicia’s features went from smiling to concerned in seconds. “Juju? Something wrong? Are you not feeling well?”
“I’m fine,” she said as she sniffled. “Just…overwhelmed. I nearly died yesterday, and I’m just…glad to be alive.”
Alicia pulled her into a tight embrace. “Baby sis, I’m so glad you are, too.”
She pulled back before she guided Julia to the bed and eased her onto it. “Are you sure that’s all this is?”
“What else would it be?” Julia asked, wiping at her tears.
“Julia…please let’s be honest with each other, okay?”
Julia stared down at her lap. “I’m being honest. There’s nothing else. It’s been a long couple of days. That’s it.”
“If you’re sure…”
“I am. And I’m also really tired–even after that twelve-hour nap.”
“Understandable,” Alicia said as she patted her sister’s shoulder. “Well, nap away. And if you need anything, just let me know. Want me to stay with you until you fall asleep?”
“No,” Julia said. She needed time to think, and room to breathe.
“Okay, sweetie. I’ll leave you to it.” Alicia rose and kissed the top of her head. With a grin, she squeezed her hand. “So glad to have you back.”
Alicia strode to the door and pulled it open when Julia stopped her. “Oh, uh, Ally?”
“Yeah?” Alicia asked as she spun to face her.
“Do you have my phone and a charger?”
Alicia’s eyes went wide for a second before she raised a finger in the air. “Uh, let me grab one and your phone. I’m sure we have an extra around here somewhere.”
“Thanks. And don’t worry about waking me, I’d like to have the phone.”
“Yeah, of course.”
Julia nestled back in the pillows, letting tears sting her eyes again after the door thudded closed. She promised once she got her phone, she’d at least text Sierra. Even if the woman was mad at her, at least she’d check on her. Or maybe she could find out through Kyle.
She felt awful using Kyle for information, but he may be her only option. He’d probably be speaking to her. Possibly not. Had her relationship with Luke angered him, too? He hadn’t been around when she’d been in the hospital. That was odd.
After everything that had happened over the past few days, she couldn’t blame any of them. This trip, supposed to be a family bonding experience, had ripped them apart piece by piece.
She let her eyes fall closed as a few hot tears burned her cheeks. After the long day, the tension sent her off to sleep. She awoke as the late afternoon sun streamed through her window.
She stretched and yawned, surprised she’d slept that long. She hoped it meant she’d sleep later tonight.
As she rolled over, she searched her nightstand and the dresser top for her phone but didn’t see it. Her shoulders slumped. Ally probably hadn’t brought it in so she wouldn’t wake her.
As much as she loved her sister for being sensitive to her recovery, she really wanted her phone. She rose from the bed and crossed to the door, pulling it open. The sound of voices rose from the kitchen.
The warm laughter reminded her of old times, soothing her tired heart a little. She descended the stairs and navigated to the kitchen. Each corner she passed held whispered memories of laughter and tears, making her heart twinge with a longing for an uncomplicated time.
She slipped through the doorway, the scent of spaghetti sauce filling the air, moist from the boiling water. It all seemed so familiar and normal. Could she step back into this life and leave her current one behind?
“Hey, Juju!” Alicia said as she stirred the pot of sauce. “Did you sleep?”
“I did,” she said as she sank into a chair at the table next to Luke.
“Feeling better?”
She nodded, struggling to reconcile things as the past melded into the present. “Did you find a phone charger for me?”
“Oh, I did,” Alicia said, “but…your phone’s done.”
“What?”
“It’s dead. We tried it in rice, but nothing.” Alicia waved a baggie of rice surrounding Julia’s phone. “I’ll grab you a new one in the morning.”
“Really? Dead? I thought it was working when–”
“Must have been the rain,” Ethan said as he set a salad on the table.
“And it doesn’t matter because you’re here with us. And we are going to cram you full of popcorn and movies so you won’t need to be on your phone.” Alicia set a steaming plate of pasta in front of her before she sank into a chair.
Julia forced a smile as she picked up her fork. She desperately wanted her phone, but she couldn’t explain that to her sister. Her eyes slid sideways, peering at the rice bag on the counter. Maybe her sister had done something wrong. Maybe the phone still worked.
Alicia called her attention back to the table as she asked her if she remembered a particular instance of pasta dinner with the four of them. Conversation flowed easily, though Julia remained quieter than normal, happy to let them assume it was due to her recent experience.
They settled on the couch afterward, leaving the dishes in the sink despite Julia’s offering to help.
“No, dishes can wait. We are going to spend some time together.”
She settled on the cushion next to Luke as her sister dimmed the lights and turned on the movie, a silly rom-com. The irony was that it was the first movie she and Grant had watched together.
It tugged at her heartstrings, but she tried to shove it aside, glancing at her sister lounging on the loveseat with Ethan. She wondered if their marriage was back on track. She guessed she’d find out soon enough.
She swallowed hard and flicked her gaze back to the screen as a scene Grant had commented on played out. Next to her, Luke chuckled before he stretched his arm across the back of the couch behind her.
She slid her eyes closed, the pull of the past tugging at her. But it felt too easy to slip back into. Was falling back into old patterns the easier path? But she knew it would only be a bandage for the pain she felt right now.
As her head started to throb at the temples, she leaned forward.
“Juju? You okay?” Alicia asked.
She sucked in a breath as she nodded. “Yeah, just…really tired again. That meal must have done it. If no one minds, I think I’ll just turn in early.”
“Oh, of course, sweetie. Yeah. It’s fine. We’ll have plenty of other nights. You want me to come up with you?”
“No, I’m okay. I’m just going to crawl into bed and go to sleep. Good night.” Julia rose from the couch and shuffled from the room, leaving behind the memories of her past and present as she climbed the stairs and pushed into her bedroom.
She found a set of her pajamas in the dresser and changed into them before she crawled between the sheets and tugged them to her chin.
The urge to cry overtook her as turmoil brewed beneath her surface again. She fought it, eventually dozing off despite the march of memories, old and recent, crowding into her mind.
The sensation of a hand clamping over her mouth startled her awake. She let out a muffled scream as she grabbed at the strong hand pressed against her lips.
“Shh,” a voice whispered in her ear.