Chapter 25 #2
As she continued, her voice trembled slightly.
“And that pressure, that financial terror, it poisons everything, you know? Your father and I were already struggling.” She glanced down and separated her wringing hands, placing them flat on her thighs before meeting my gaze again.
“Things hadn't been right between us for a while, small cracks forming.
But the stress of the embezzlement, the sheer panic of potentially losing everything we'd built together magnified every fault line.
The arguments became constant, bitter. The trust wasn't just broken by Russell and Lucia. It shattered between Archie and me too. We blamed each other, we withdrew. That betrayal, the financial ruin looming over us, took whatever was left of our marriage and just... blew it to cinders. He walked out not long after. That whole period cost me my savings, nearly my home, and ultimately, my husband.”
She looked at me pointedly. “So when I saw you and Julianne in each other’s arms, right there by the bonfire.
.. For a split second, it wasn't you I saw. It was the memory of that time—the secrecy, the passion mixed up with the business, the potential for everything to just implode. It brought back that awful feeling of vulnerability, of things spiraling out of control right under my nose.”
I tried not to squirm as guilt twisted inside me. “I didn’t think about that. I’m sorry. We never meant for you to feel like that.”
“Of course you didn’t.” Her voice finally took on some warmth again.
“I know that. But I hope you understand better where I’m coming from now.
That when I see another workplace romance, especially involving someone in a position of financial trust like Julianne, my alarm bells ring loudly.
It's not that I don't trust her, Eli. It's that I know firsthand how devastating the consequences can be when personal feelings and professional responsibilities get tangled in the heart of our family business. And how easily it can destroy more than just the balance sheet.”
Her gaze became almost pleading. “Sweetheart, my greatest joy is seeing my children happy.
Truly settled, confident, and content. If you had come to me right now, looked me square in the eye, and said with absolute certainty, without a flicker of doubt, 'Mom, I love Julianne Verne, and I am all in, ready for whatever comes,' then perhaps we’d be having a different conversation.”
My heart took off again, thumping out of my chest as I parted my lips. The opening was there. All I had to do was say it. My chest froze, the words sticking in my lungs. Nothing came out, and I closed my mouth again and took a sip of coffee I didn’t even taste.
She leaned forward again, her hand covering mine on the table.
“Right now? Your hesitation, the panic in your eyes this very moment…
it tells me you're not there yet. You're still battling those old fears, Eli. And jumping deeper into this relationship, especially keeping it hidden while you're still fighting those demons is reckless. It’s unfair—to you, to her, and yes, to the stability this family and this resort desperately need right now.”
Her grip tightened slightly. “Maybe what you need isn't diving into this even deeper, but some space. Time for you to really confront those fears, Eli. To be absolutely sure of what you want, of what you’re capable of offering. Because Julianne deserves someone who is committed, without reservation. And so do you. You deserve to be free of that fear.”
Her words landed like body blows. She wasn’t just enforcing an arbitrary, outdated rule. She was calling out my deepest insecurities, my years-long pattern of emotional evasion. And damn her, she wasn’t entirely wrong. I was scared. I had hesitated.
Frustration warred with a sickening wave of self-awareness.
I felt trapped, misunderstood, yet simultaneously exposed.
She thought I wasn't ready? Maybe she was right. But it didn’t feel like protective concern.
Her opinion felt like judgment, like she was using my own internal struggle against me, perhaps even prioritizing the resort’s smooth operation over my messy, complicated heart.
It was almost a relief when a hard knot of anger formed in my gut.
That gave me something to focus on other than the clawing panic that had lodged in my heart.
“So that’s it?” My voice was rough, tight with resentment. “You’re saying I have to choose? Walk away from something… something really good because I’m not fitting into your perfect picture of commitment right now?”
“I’m saying,” Helen replied, her voice gentle but unwavering, “that maybe this painful situation is forcing you to confront things you’ve avoided for a long time. Maybe this pause is exactly what you need, Eli.”
I pulled my hand away, standing abruptly. The carefully controlled conversation had imploded. I felt raw, angry, and utterly lost. I turned away from her and stalked toward the edge of the patio, needing distance. The vast ocean offered no answers, only mirrored the turbulent chaos inside me.
She hadn’t forbidden it. She’d just made it impossible. Mom had put the ball entirely in my court, knowing damn well I was terrified to pick it up and run with it. And it left me stranded, caught between the woman I was undeniably falling for and the lifelong fears I still hadn’t conquered.