Chapter Three
Chapter
three
REVENGE: THE MOST EFFECTIVE WAY to get over someone.
I had written those words at the top of a page in my notebook and held it up. We were sitting in a diner in Old Town called the Purple Starfish. It did not sell fish, and nothing was purple, not the walls or the booths or the tiles, not even any of the food. But Deja’s parents owned the place, so she was the only one allowed to make fun of the name and she did, often.
The ocean, out the windows to my right, was rough today, the choppy water churning in the bay. I appreciated its support.
“I don’t think that’s how the saying goes,” Lee said. His boyfriend, Maxwell, sat next to him, leaning forward, elbows on the table. The four of us had become friends freshman year when we were grouped together for a project in biology. The project consisted of explaining a science concept in a creative way. Most of the class did picture essays or science experiments. Maxwell had suggested we write a song explaining evolution to the tune of “Look What You Made Me Do” by Taylor Swift. I swear, Lee fell in love with him in that moment. We all did, really.
“Direct your negativity at ideas for payback,” I said now, cradling my notebook. “Not at my very correct page header.”
“What did Jensen say?” Deja asked, mopping a fry through a pile of ketchup from the basket of fries she’d collected from the kitchen herself. She was supposed to be working, but it was slow today. “Did he try to talk to you? Call you? Text you? I want to know how he attempted to defend himself.”
I swallowed. I didn’t want to share what he said; it’s why I hadn’t up until this point. I was embarrassed.
“Whatever he said,” Deja added, seeming to sense why I wasn’t sharing. “It’s BS. It’s his way to make himself feel better.”
She was right. I pulled out my phone and cleared my throat, trying to muster up even more anger to outweigh the hurt. “He said, and I quote: It was both of our ideas. Remember? We brainstormed. And I told the seniors that, by the way. It was the only reason you got picked for research and not left out completely. Because they thought you came up with two pretty solid ideas. ”
“No, he didn’t,” Maxwell said. “That’s messed up.”
“It’s not true,” Deja said, putting her hand on my forearm. “You know that, right? That was your idea. You told me about it weeks before you brainstormed with Jensen. And today you told me they almost picked two girls for the hosting spot. The other girl was you, Finley. He shouldn’t have tried out, period, let alone stolen your idea to do it.”
“Maybe the other girl wasn’t going to be me,” I said, my eyes on the window again. Pelicans were diving just off the boardwalk, taking advantage of the fish a group of sea lions must’ve corralled.
“It was,” Lee said, pulling my attention back inside.
I wasn’t so sure. Regardless, the thought fueled my anger.
“Did you talk to Nolen or Susie?” Deja asked. “Tell them he stole your idea?”
“And come off like the sore loser who wasn’t chosen?” I asked. “You really think they’d believe me?” The idea of getting rejected again made me want to bury my head in the sand.
“Yeah, probably not,” Deja said.
“What I can’t believe is that he’s trying to take credit for your research spot while at the same time stealing your dream spot,” Max said.
I couldn’t believe any of this. That my boyfriend, of all people, had done this to me. “My boyfriend,” I said out loud. “He’s still my boyfriend.”
“You don’t think he knows it’s over?” Lee asked. “I mean, I would.”
“You should definitely make it official,” Maxwell said. “But no in-person meeting for him. He didn’t follow any sort of social protocol in what he did. You shouldn’t either. First on the revenge agenda, break up with him over text.”
“I have the best friends,” Deja said.
“To friends who love pettiness,” I said, holding up my Coke, trying to bring some levity to this situation because otherwise I was going to burn from the inside out.
Lee and Maxwell bumped my cup with theirs, and Deja bumped with a fry.
The front door of the diner opened, and a group of four guys walked in. The seagull-teasing football players from school earlier. They had changed out of their jerseys. I was glad to see Jensen wasn’t with them. Not that he would be, because his nemesis, Theo Torres, headed the group. He had the slightest limp, reminding me of his injury from four months ago. Something to do with his knee, if I remembered right. Whatever it was, it had allowed Jensen to score a much-needed field goal in the last game of the season. That clutch play, along with the fact that Theo was graduating, pretty much secured Jensen’s place as the starting kicker next year.
Jensen really was going to have a perfect senior year. His dream, my dream, he got it all.
“Theo is so hot,” Maxwell mumbled.
“Hello, I’m sitting right here,” Lee said.
“You know he is,” Max said.
Lee nodded. “Everyone knows he is.”
Deja gave Theo an assessing look. “Yes, I think everyone does…including him.”
I’d met him once before at a party I went to with Jensen, but we talked for less than ten minutes. I was sure Theo, Mr.Popular, didn’t remember. I gave him a quick glance. “ I don’t think he’s hot. And you’re right—he’s super cocky.” That was one of the many complaints from Jensen over the last year. He was cocky and spoiled and selfish with his time and not as good as he thought he was and on and on.
“Exactly,” she said.
Theo and his friends walked up to the counter, where Deja’s mom took their order. He wasn’t super tall, like Jensen, but he was strong. He had dark hair that he kept long all over. His skin was a golden brown, and he had thick lashes that curled up, making his eyes look like they were always smiling, mocking. His teeth were a bright white. And he didn’t dress like he was about to work out at any moment like so many of the football players, including Jensen, did with their athletic shorts and sloppy tees or muscle shirts. He wore jeans and a purple tee with Vans.
“I would be cocky too if I looked like that,” Maxwell muttered. Max was cute, but in a boyish way. He had a round face and a round body. A mop of red hair and freckles. Lee was handsome too: an Asian guy with spiky hair, kind eyes, and full lips. And Deja was gorgeous. She was Indian, with straight black hair and strikingeyes.
“He thinks he’s the king of his friend group, the king of school,” I said.
“Isn’t he?” Lee asked. “I don’t really know Theo.”
“He doesn’t want to be known. He keeps his group small and acts like everyone else is beneath him. I don’t even know if he likes his own friends,” I added, picturing him with his earbuds in earlier…well, one earbud, but still. “And he could’ve been a mentor to Jensen, but instead he kept him down.” I took a sip from my Coke.
“Retroactively, I’ve decided Jensen deserved it,” Deja said.
I nodded slowly. “Yeah, maybe.” I didn’t know why it was hard for me to think of Jensen’s past self as the same person who just screwed me over, but I needed to start. “Be right back. I need topee.”
In the bathroom, I shut and locked myself into a stall and took a deep breath. I hated thinking about Jensen and the fact that I could be so wrong about someone I’d been making out with for the last year. About someone I had genuinely cared about. What did that say about me ?
As I was laying the seat protector on the toilet, I took in the graffiti lining the door and walls of the stall, written in colorful markers or ballpoint pens. Yoga is life. The cow’s name was Fred. I sell curses. I gave a breathy laugh as I used the toilet, then flushed. After washing my hands, I joined the others at the table.
“How do your parents feel about all the bathroom graffiti?” I asked Deja.
She shrugged. “It’s a never-ending battle, so they’ve stopped trying to clean it up. They only make me scrub the super-vulgar ones now.”
“Then come be my lookout,” I said. I had a couple markers still in my purse from the posters we’d made for the last football game of the season, which was over four months ago now. I really needed to clean out my purse more often.
“Your lookout for what?”
“I need to write a message in the boys’ bathroom about Jensen.”
Maxwell laughed. “Yes! With his phone number, right?”
“For sure,” I said.
“What are you going to write?” she asked.
“Don’t worry, you won’t be on scrubbing duty.”
Deja slid out of the booth and followed me to the bathroom.
I glanced around. “Don’t let anyone in,” I said, and kicked open the door with my foot. “Hello?”
I was met with silence, so I stepped in, letting the door swing shut behind me. I beelined it past the urinals and straight for a stall. I found an open space on the back of the door and wrote: Looking for a good time or the love of your life? I could be either. I make dreams come true (mostly my own). Text me. I added his number to the end and was starting on a little heart when the door creaked open.
“Don’t rush me,” I loud-whispered to Deja. “I’m writing a masterpiece.”
When she didn’t respond, I peered around the corner and locked eyes with Theo, whose brows rose in surprise. I would kill Deja later.
“Did I make a wrong turn?” he asked, but he didn’t back out to look at the sign. He just stared at me, knowing full well that I was the one in the wrong place, not him.
I capped the Sharpie in my hand and channeled my embarrassment into snarkiness. “No, just posting some ads for the general public.”
He strode to where I stood, and his gaze went to the door.
Okay, fine, if I disregarded Jensen’s stories and the things I had witnessed, I could see that Theo was hot. Even more so up close. The ends of his hair brushed along his sharp jaw, and his shoulders seemed even wider this close. And he smelled good too, like soap and vanilla.
“Wouldn’t joining an online dating site be easier?” he asked.
I forced my gaze back up to his eyes. “It might. But this is a gift for my ex, Jensen. This is his number.” Technically not my ex but on his way to being my ex for sure.
“Jensen Ballard?”
“I only want the highest-quality people contacting him.”
“Patrons of the Purple Starfish…bathroom?”
“Exactly.” I cleared my throat and shut the bathroom stall. “He’s told me a lot about you, by the way. Good to meet you.”
Theo let out a scoffing laugh and looked around like this was the oddest place to meet someone. It probably was. “Did you say your ex ?” he asked.
“Yeah, after what happened today…” I trailed off.
“What happened today?”
“You didn’t hear?” Had he not been there for the end-of-school announcements? Even if he hadn’t, the whole school was talking about it. The comments I’d gotten on the way to my car earlier threatened to redden my cheeks now.
“No. What?” he asked. I couldn’t tell if he was serious in his ignorance. His expression was completely neutral.
“Nothing. We just broke up.”
“And I should’ve heard about this?” he asked in a condescending way.
I sighed. “Can I help you?”
He let out a single laugh. “You’re the one in the guys’ bathroom writing sex ads for your ex-boyfriend.”
I gasped. “It’s not a…It’s just an I want him to get spammed ad.”
“Nice.” He was judging me. He thought I was a bitter ex. And I was, but for perfectly reasonable reasons!
I held out the Sharpie. “Want to add anything?”
He smirked. “You seem to have it covered.” With that he headed to a urinal. “Are you going to stay for the show or…?” He reached for the button on his pants.
“I’m leaving.” I walked to the door.
“Oh, and by the way,” he said as I gripped the handle, “we’ve met before, but Miss Soccer Star probably doesn’t remember.”
My mouth fell open as I rushed out the door. First, I wasn’t a soccer star. Obviously, having quit. And even when I had been on the team, I was just average. Deja was the star. So he was probably mocking me with that title. Second, I had no idea he knew any facts about me at all, let alone that I had been on the soccer team. Third, this interaction didn’t really change my opinion about him or his personality.
Deja was back at the table. I gave her a why did you abandon me? face as I approached.
“Sorry,” she said. “I had to help my mom with drinks for a second. Nobody was coming.”
“Theo came in,” I said.
She laughed so hard she snorted.
“It’s fate, karma,” Max said.
I slid into the booth, gripping the notebook I had left on the table. “What does it have to do with fate or karma?”
“Fate is telling you that you should try to date him,” Maxwell said. Then he waved a finger at my notebook. “He’s your ex’s nemesis. That should be top on your list of revenge ideas. Jensen would be crushed if you dated Theo.”
“No,” Deja said. “You don’t need any more jerks in your life.”
“Seriously,” Lee said.
Max shrugged. “I’m just saying….”
I thought about it for a second. He was right—Jensen would be crushed. But even if Theo wanted to date me, which was a very low possibility at this point, I decided that using someone to hurt someone else wasn’t going to make the list. “No, this list will only include ways to stick it to Jensen. No collateral damage.” Not that I thought I could damage Theo, probably the exact opposite, butstill.
“I have a revenge idea,” Lee said. “How about you only suggest terrible ideas for the podcast. Since you’re the research specialist now and since he has no original ideas.”
“Yes, absolutely.” I wrote that down.
Theo and his friends across the diner laughed about something. When I looked over, our eyes met. I raised my eyebrows in a challenge, and he smirked back. Great, he was probably sharing the bathroom story. As if I needed another reason for the whole school to be talking about me. I turned my attention back to my friends. “First things first. I have a text to compose.”
My phone was on the table, and I picked it up. It felt weird to break up with Jensen over text. But why shouldn’t I? He’d told the whole school I wouldn’t make a good podcast host. I had spent hundreds of dollars on equipment and many years trying to be justthat.
“Compose it out loud,” Lee said as he watched me staring at my phone.
“Dear Jensen,” I said.
“No dear, ” Deja interrupted.
“Jensen,” I said, deleting the dear.
“Jerk face?” Maxwell suggested.
“Selfish pig?” Lee offered.
I smiled. “I think I’ll stick with Jensen —that way he doesn’t know what’s coming right away.”
“Good call,” Lee said.
I turned my attention back to my phone. “Jensen, after today, I don’t think—”
“Too nice,” Deja said.
I grunted. “Jensen, you know what you did.”
“And you know what I have to do,” Max said in a deep voice.
Deja laughed.
“You know what you did,” I repeated. “Don’t pretend I should’ve seen this coming. Don’t pretend that me feeling blindsided makes me a bad, unsupportive girlfriend. You are the one who destroyed anything we could’ve had….” I trailed off, not sure if this was what I wanted to say at all. It was too little and maybe too much. He didn’t deserve to know I felt destroyed. What I really wanted to write was something sarcastic like Jensen, it’s been real but apparently not real enough because who knew you were such a jerk.
“It’s good,” Deja encouraged, getting me out of my head.
“Can you add buttface to the end there?” Maxwell said.
Lee reached out and patted my arm. “How about you just add it’s over. ”
I nodded, typed those two words to the end of my text and pushed send.
It was over.
My eyes pricked, and I clenched my teeth to keep the tears at bay. I looked at my notebook full of half-baked, not-nearly-big-enough ideas for revenge. “He stole my dream,” I said out loud. “I need to figure out how to obliterate his.”
“Football?” Max whispered reverently.
I nodded. “Somehow, we have to take football away from him.”