Chapter 26
TWENTY-SIX
STORM
“ O kay, so are you clear on what we’re doing here?” Shae whispers as we stand outside the playroom I had set up for the twins. Inside, both Tempest and Raiden play video games Axel set up for them. I had to check behind my friend’s work to make sure all the downloads were age appropriate.
They weren’t all at first.
“Yes,” I say, clearing my throat. I’m about to spend time with my kids. Sure, Shae will be there and we’re going to answer some tough questions from the twins, but…I’m about to be around them, talking with them.
Is it normal that I want to run around the house like a maniac?
“I’m to let you take the lead,” I say to Shae, “and if I say something wrong, you’ll squeeze my thigh.”
Shae tsks.
“I’m not gonna touch your thigh,” she says, huffing.
I’d smile if I weren’t a ball of emotions right now. It’s not just the confrontation we’re about to have with our kids that’s got me on edge. It’s Lakeland. It’s the Keystone CEO’s death. It’s Riale and Axel being asses.
“You’re in charge,” I say, waving a hand toward the door to indicate Shae should enter. But instead of opening the door, she pauses with her hand on the doorknob. Her face shows all her thoughts, and…she’s terrified.
“Shae,” I say, trying so damn hard to push down my fear and excitement. “It’s going to be great.”
I watch as she absorbs my words, track the movement of her throat as she swallows. Then, after she straightens her shoulders and takes a deep breath, I follow her into the room.
“You’re cheating!” Tempest screeches, pushing her brother over with her shoulder.
They sit side by side on beanbag chairs in front of the hundred-inch television screen.
A split-screen view of Mario Kart shows the top player, Princess Peach, stuck on the side of the track while the bottom driver, Bowser, races toward the finish line in first place.
Tempest straightens her car and races after her brother, but a few seconds later, Raiden crosses the finish line with a loud, “Whoop!”
“No fair!” Tempest yells, throwing her controller and folding her arms. Raiden, either oblivious to or uncaring of his sister’s distress, dances in a circle around their seats.
Tempest’s expression turns hostile, and Shae, likely with some kind of mother’s sixth sense, lunges toward our daughter, standing between her and her brother.
“Okay!” Shae says, clapping her hands three times to get everyone’s attention. “No fighting. Raiden, turn the Xbox and TV off. Tempest, come here.”
Tempest, with her arms still folded and her face scrunched up, hops to her feet and stands a few inches away from her mother.
Then, Shae crouches down and pulls our daughter into a hug.
Inch by inch, Tempest relaxes, pressing her face into the crook of Shae’s neck. The moment is simple, poignant, and I pull my phone, grateful to snap a picture before they pull apart.
“Everyone, let’s sit. Your…your father and I want to talk to you,” Shae says, and like a record scratch, both kids turn to where I’m standing in the entryway. Tempest’s expression is skeptical; Raiden’s is cautious.
How is this going to go?
I take a step into the playroom and eventually end up next to Shae. She pulls on my hand, and I lower to the ground, sitting cross-legged from the kids as they perch on their beanbags.
No one says anything for a long, awkward moment.
“So,” Shae begins, rubbing her hands on her thighs.
“There’s been a lot that’s happened in the last week, things I’m sure you’re confused about or are overwhelmed by.
So, your father and I wanted to leave this time for you to ask whatever questions you have, and for us to decide where the four of us go from here. ”
Tempest and Raiden share a look.
“How long are we gonna stay here?” Tempest asks, and Shae looks at me. Which makes sense—I’m the one requiring them to live with me.
“A few weeks. The rest of the summer, at least,” I say, my voice scratchy. I look to Shae, and she looks worried, but not overly so.
Probably because she was anticipating my real answer, which is forever.
Raiden frowns, and I don’t press him because Tempest pelts me with another question.
“Why haven’t you been around?”
I blow out a breath. That question. Shae and I’d practiced our response, and I look to her to take the lead, as she’d requested.
“Your father and I haven’t been able to get in contact with each other for many years. It wasn’t until recently that we found each other again. As soon as he learned about you two, he immediately came to meet you.”
“Yes, at that smelly old museum,” Raiden says, and Tempest rolls her eyes.
“What’s your name?” This comes from Raiden. I give him my attention when I answer.
“My full name is Storm Alexander Sandoval.”
Raiden’s face brightens. “You’re an Alexander, like me!”
I nod and smile, feeling a warm, tight clench in my chest. I turn to my daughter.
“And Tempest, did you know your middle name is my mother’s name? Amaya.” Tempest doesn’t smile at that.
“Your mom? Is that my grandma? Where is she?” Her bottom lip wobbles, and panic has me looking at Shae.
Tempest shoots up, her tiny body vibrating as she stands over us.
“Did she not want me, either?” Tempest yells, but before anyone can respond, she sprints out of the playroom.
Shae, Raiden, and I sit in silence for three seconds before I stand to go after her.
“Don’t,” Shae says. “She’ll need some space, but I’ll go talk to her.”
I shake my head. God, this is turning into a clusterfuck of all clusterfucks.
“She needs to know I didn’t leave her, I didn’t?—”
She needs to know…what? That I understand she’s angry and hurt, but I want to be her dad and love her more than anything? That I’d do anything for her? That she’s precious and wanted?
Fuck.
I grab my chest, and Shae stands, putting a hand on my forearm.
“Baby steps,” she says, and the gesture and the whispered words do more for my soul than I’d ever thought possible. The look on her face is tender and patient, bringing me back to the central reason why we’re here in the first place: to take the first step in becoming a family.
Shae gives me a gentle smile, and I give her one in return.
And all the tension falls away.
“Tempest runs away when she’s scared,” Raiden says, breaking the moment between his mother and me. “But I have one more question.”
I crouch down, getting to his eye level.
“Tell me,” I say.
Raiden takes a deep breath and says, “Why did you go away in the first place?”
Of course he’d ask that question. Raiden is quiet, but he’s incredibly intelligent and introspective. Where his sister is like a volcano, he’s like the rain.
So that’s why I don’t look over my shoulder at Shae for approval. Instead, I tell my son the truth.
“I was a fool,” I rasp. Raiden continues to look at me, nearly unblinking as he absorbs my words. “Your mother is the best person I know, and I hurt her. A lot.”
Raiden’s eyebrows come together, and he withdraws from me.
“No, not physically. I never hit your mom, I swear that to you.” Raiden retains his skeptical expression, his wariness something he’s inherited from Shae.
“I hurt her heart. I broke her heart. And it’s the worst thing I’ve ever done in my life, but it’s my mission to make things right with her and with you and your sister.”
Raiden holds my gaze for a moment before looking past me to his mother.
“Mommy, can I go with you?” he whispers, pulling away from me emotionally, just as he pulls away from me physically.
“Of course, sweetie,” Shae says.
I don’t watch as both of them leave the room.
Shae said it’ll take baby steps, and I hope like hell she’s right.