Chapter 15
CHASE
“What in the actual fuck was that, Sam?!”
I shove him away from me with more force than I probably should, but I can’t get the look on Isaiah’s face – or my disgusting impulsive thoughts – out of my mind.
When I turned and saw the boy I watched flourish from the age of sixteen coming down from an orgasm, my first reaction was satisfaction, not shame or horror or anything remotely indicating that I would never want to see that look on his face again.
For fuck’s sake, Isaiah is younger than Reese was when Tim took him to our bed!
I’ve spent the last two years hating Tim for being so disgusting, but what does that make me? I’m nineteen fucking years older than Isaiah...
“Okay, I’m sorry. I didn’t fucking plan that,” he snaps back at me while stuffing his feet into boots on his way to the open front door.
“But right now, I’m more concerned with the guy who just ran out of the house without shoes in fucking December than I am with the mental fallout of the best damn climax of my life. ”
I slide down the front of the fridge to the floor when the door slams a moment later. I’m supposed to be the mature and responsible one in this relationship. Is it even a relationship?
After a while of me just staring into space, Sam helps me up off the kitchen floor and pulls me into his arms. I didn’t even hear him come back inside.
My entire being is just numb at this point.
The time spent alone in this silent house was enough for me to realize I’m a fucking hypocrite of the highest order.
“I couldn’t find him, Chase. I don’t even know where to look. He’s so introverted that beyond his obsession with order and the Asian shit, I know next to nothing about him.”
Pulling back from the embrace, I look down at Sam with confusion.
The Isaiah I knew is far from introverted.
The boy was exhuberant and the life of the party with his team in Juniors.
As for college, Liam only ever said great things about him and commented on more than one occasion that it’s a shame that a goalie can’t wear the C.
“Are we talking about the same Isaiah Charming?” I ask when Sam isn’t more forthcoming. “Izzy may take a minute to warm up to new situations, but I would never consider him introverted. And his billet mom was always complaining about how his room was a certifiable disaster area.”
Sam steps back and gestures to the neat rows on his counters before collapsing into a chair at the table.
“See, that’s the problem. You seem to know a different guy than the one who has been living here for the last month, but he obviously recognizes you.”
I take the initiative to grab a couple sodas from the fridge and join him at the table. After taking a few sips to settle my thoughts, I decide to share more of my story with Sam than I intended to this early in our acquaintance.
“Remember how I told you that I have an ex-husband over in Ohio?”
He nods and cracks open his soda while I prepare myself mentally for the backlash that I’m certain is about to come my way.
I start my story where the course of my life changed – meeting Tim in college, back when I was still playing.
“At that time, Liam Rawlings was the captain of the Wreckers, while I was lucky enough to wear the A under him.”
Sam starts choking on his soda but manages to cough out, “Liam Rawlings?! You know the arguably best defenseman the game of hockey has seen in the last fifty years that only stopped playing because he sacrificed his fucking leg for the game?!”
Patting him on the back until his cough subsides, I can’t help but smile. Liam was not only my roommate but also became my closest confidant. He was the only guy on the team that knew I was gay and helped keep my secret until after our last season together ended.
“I’ll get you an autographed puck if you want,” I say sarcastically before continuing with my story.
“Playing with Liam brought around a lot of puck bunnies and guys that wanted to capitalize on being talent adjacent. One of those guys was Tim. When he noticed that I never even engaged the bunnies in conversation – not that most of them were capable of intelligent conversation anyways – he took a chance and told me that he was gay.”
Sam snorts again, sans cola this time, before remarking, “Bold of him to assume that the reason you weren’t interested was because they had the wrong parts and not that majority of bunnies in college are little more than holes to fill in exchange for possible future fame.”
I laugh coldly at his assessment because the thirty-nine-year-old me can look back and recognize the predator in him while the twenty-two-year-old me only saw another gay man in mostly conservative university that shared interests with me.
“He’s always been good at making people not look too deep when it comes to his motives.
And long story short, I fell hard for him.
Instead of going Ivy League on a scholarship for my masters, I stayed at Wrenshaw for the next three years until Tim finished his undergrad.
We were married at the Justice of the Peace a week after I secured my job with Stryker Financial and bought what I thought was our dream house less than an hour away from the house I grew up in – where my parents still lived at the time. ”
“Sounds like he only wanted you for your paycheck. Sure he wasn’t a bunny, too?”
Now, I guess it’s my turn to experience carbonation up the nose. I can honestly say it is something I do not ever want to experience again any time soon. The burning is temporary, but the after effects are strange and make me feel like I need to sneeze.
“Sorry about that,” Sam says and hands me a napkin. “I’m just not a fan of the guy, especially now that I made the connection that he’s the douche that almost wrecked Isaiah’s first game with the Axes.”
Tim was at that game? Thinking back, I realize that was the day after he ambushed me at the condo.
Of course the asshole was complaining about driving to me to complain about the house while using the excuse to go see another alumnus of the local Juniors team playing for their new team.
I used to take some of those road trips with him when I could get the time off work.
He is technically self-employed, so that was never an issue for him.
“I’m going to need more information on that,” I demand, leaning forward with my elbows on the table. “Tim getting kicked out in the middle of a hockey game is like Christmas and my birthday for a decade all rolled into one happy package.”
Sam smirks but waves to me to continue my story. So I tell him about the eight years of season tickets once the team came to the area, including two years of hosting players as billets.
“After Isaiah left the team midway through the season when he went to college, I really paid attention to how Tim was interacting with the players. I had already suspended our house as a billet house for the season, but I was honestly debating canceling our tickets as well. He was too close to the players – too familiar. Looking back, I think I picked up on it when Izzy was hanging out at our house with the guys that were staying with us. I built a pretty killer game room in the basement complete with billiards, darts, and a seventy five inch flat screen for movies and video games.”
Sam reaches across the table to take my hand and asks, “Wanna recreate that room in my basement?”
I laugh and get up to toss my empty can in the trash. Sam wraps his arms around me from behind, and I lean my head back over his shoulder to stare up at the ceiling.
“So, that’s why your Izzy and the Isaiah I’ve known for the last month are so different? You knew him when he was still a kid. A lot can happen in college. Kids grow up.”
I turn around to return the embrace and sigh, “The kid I knew would never shut himself away from people. He thrives in a crowd. Over the years I have known him, today is the only time I have ever seen him avoid me. Granted, he had a valid reason, but I can’t reconcile the Isaiah I knew with who you’re describing. ”