Chapter 10
Kylian
Everything is dark, and yet there is an explosion of color in my mind.
My bear is so damn close and for the first time in my life, she’s revealed herself to me.
It was the moment Erick looked me in the eye, his bear surging forward and somehow calling my own.
Out of the darkness she lunged, swiping her paw at him and causing immense pain to shoot through my head.
Even though she hurt me, I'm unbelievably excited to meet and truly see her in my mind's eye. And let me tell you, she's gorgeous. Beautiful, with golden brown fur that is lighter than my brothers’ and a distinct white mark down her snout that reminds me of my mother.
Come out, I plead. Please.
Lana and Alyssa told me a long time ago that they talk to their cats all the time.
When I asked them if their cats talked back, they laughed and said they throw an attitude and respond with monosyllabic words.
After they told me that, I went home and talked to my bear for hours.
Night after night, I tried to get her to talk back to me but she never would.
It was like I was shouting into the void—a vast nothingness where my voice echoed off the walls and exasperated my loneliness.
Cool air hits my overheated skin as Erick strips me out of my leggings and hoists my leg up on his shoulder. One swipe of his tongue against my slick folds and my hips buck forward searching for relief.
“Fucking Fates, babygirl. You taste like wildflower infused honey,” he says before plunging his tongue inside of me.
I sag against my restraints, my knee buckling against the intense pleasure building in my lower belly.
The cramping I felt yesterday is replaced by a heavy pressure—a giant pool pushing against a dam, climbing the impenetrable wall and splashing against the top.
But just like every time I’ve tried to masturbate, I can’t will the dam to break—the pressure ebbing and flowing with no signs of relief.
It’s an infuriating feeling that leaves me frustrated and in tears until I ultimately give up.
Something tells me Erick is not going to give up.
He licks and sucks, pulling my clit into his mouth while growling against my pussy, “Let go for me, Kylian. Let go for your mate.”
Tears soak the T-shirt wrapped around my eyes and every muscle in my body trembles as I whimper, “I can’t.”
“You can, babygirl.”
A blinding sharp pain, hot like fire, sparks on my mound—the dam exploding at the same time my bear roars to life and drowns out all other sounds.
I see her again and she’s furious, thrashing around and smacking her paws against the pitch black ground that mirrors the equally dark background—the cave she lives in, the void I’ve been shouting into for over a decade.
And then sweet relief floods my veins at the same time bright colors shoot from behind her, filling my vision until I see nothing but balls of color rushing toward my face and exploding upon contact.
“Kylian!” Erick barks, his big body looming over mine.
I blink multiple times, noting the fluorescent lights behind his head and realize I’m lying on my back. When did he lay me down and why? “Erick?”
“Fucking hell.” He presses his lips to mine. “You scared the shit out of me.”
“What happened?” There’s a wave of calm floating through my veins right now. I don’t feel feverish and my stomach isn’t cramping but I’m very aware of my nakedness as the cool air touches my arms and legs.
“I’m pretty sure you came and then passed out.”
“I came? Are you sure?”
“You flooded my mouth with the sweetest honey I’ve ever tasted and convulsed head to toe before going limp. If I didn’t know better, I’d have worried you were having a seizure.” He presses his forehead to my chest. “You don’t remember?”
“I—” Panic grips me as I realize I don’t see, hear, or feel my bear. Shooting up, I smack Erick in the side of his face with my forehead, my hands still bound in front of me. “I saw her. I saw my bear.”
He sits back on his hip and smiles. “You did?”
“Yeah but I can’t feel her now.”
“When did you first see her?”
“When you showed me your bear. Your eyes glowed brightly and I could see him, like he was pressing his face to a window and then she charged forward and took a swipe at him.”
“She did?” Erick rubs his lips with the back of his hand and then tugs on his beard as his gaze shoots around the room.
“What does that mean?”
“I don’t know, babygirl. What did she do after that?”
I try to remember but she disappeared just as quickly as she came. Next thing I knew, my focus was on his mouth between my legs and the orgasm that wouldn’t release. I shake my head, a familiar wave of abandonment filling my chest. “She left.”
Erick pulls me onto his lap and wipes the tears I didn’t know were falling down my cheeks with his thumb. “It’s okay, babygirl. We’re going to bring her back.”
“I’m so sorry, Erick.” I bury my face in my hands.
“Sorry for what?” He strokes my hair and presses kisses to the top of my head. It’s sweet and makes me feel safe to be my chaotically honest self in his arms.
“I’m sorry the Fates cursed you with a dysfunctional mate.” I don’t know why but saying the words out loud just makes me cry harder.
“You are not dysfunctional, babygirl.” He hooks his finger under my chin, gently trying to lift my head.
I shake my head and refuse to show my face. “I’m a freak!”
Erick wraps his hand around my throat, his thumb pressing underneath my jaw to force my face out of my hands. “I never want to hear you say that again. That word is off-limits, Kylian. Do you understand me?” He barks his words and his eyes shimmer with thinly controlled rage.
I stare back with wide eyes and nod. “Sorry.”
He closes his eyes and presses his forehead to mine.
“No, babygirl, I’m sorry. But understand me when I say that you are not a freak and you are not dysfunctional.
Every single one of us has our own path and while you might know dozens of shifters in Fortune Falls who seemingly shifted overnight with no problem, I promise every one of their stories are unique. ”
“Have you ever heard of a shifter who can’t shift?”
“Yes.”
I pull my head back. “One who has never shifted? Not one that lost its mate and then stopped shifting like my father.”
He tilts his head in thought and then shakes it. “No, but I wasn’t raised in a pack like you. There’s a lot of shifter shit I’ve never seen.”
“Why weren’t you raised in a pack? Where are your parents?” He mentioned foster care last night, but I asked no follow-up questions.
“Are you hungry?” He brushes my hair back from my face. “You’re no longer sweating but how is your stomach? Can I feed you?”
“Are you avoiding my questions?”
“No, but I need to feed and care for my mate and I’d rather have that conversation somewhere else.”
As if to answer for me, my stomach grumbles loudly.
He grins and lifts me to my feet, quickly standing behind me. Instinctively I step back and press my bare ass against his jean-clad cock, only to realize that there is nothing between us.
I gasp and try to take a step forward but Erick grabs my hips and holds me pressed against him, his thick erection jerking against the swell of my ass. “Erick?”
“Nothing happened, Kylian. I loosened my belt and zipper to give my dick some relief while I was going down on you. Everything happened so fast, I didn’t get a chance to tuck him away.”
If my hands weren’t tied, I would reach between us to touch him. “Can I see?”
Erick groans and lets go of my hips as his answer.
Slowly I turn around, my eyes meeting his before trailing down his wide, hair-covered chest to six-pack abs and then lower to where only half of his thick cock is poking out of his jeans that are loose on his hips. “Oh my.”
“I’m sure you’ve seen an erect cock before.” His voice seems to drop two octaves as his hands clench into fists at his side. It’s as if he wants to touch me but he’s resisting his baser instincts to claim his mate.
It’s true, I have. Shifters are very comfortable in their naked human forms—both males and females alike. And considering they have to strip in order to shift without shredding their clothes, stumbling upon someone naked in the woods around Fortune Falls is not uncommon.
But none of them look like Erick.
I bring my eyes back up to his, my mouth watering for a taste of him.
His eyes glow with need, his jaw set and muscle ticking.
Giving in to what I want, I don’t ask permission and drop to my knees in front of him.
“Oh sweet Fates, Kylian. What are you doing?”
“Please, mate. Show me what to do.”
He doesn’t fight me, cupping my cheek with one hand while pushing his jeans down with the other. The full length of him springs forward, a drop of pre-cum spilling from the tip. “Open your mouth, babygirl and show me your tongue.”
I do exactly as he says, watching in fascination as he grips his cock and slowly strokes his long length while placing the tip on my waiting tongue. Salty skin with a mild soapy scent slides smoothly into my mouth.
“You can lick and suck me anyway you want. Just avoid using your teeth until you have some experience.” He flexes his fingers on the back of my neck but doesn’t force my head in any direction.
I bring my head forward and take him as deep as I can, jerking back when he hits the back of my throat.
“It’s okay, you don’t have to take me deep.”
I lift my bound hands over my head. “Untie me?”
He quickly works on my binds while I swirl my tongue around the head of his cock, tracing the ridges and thick vein running underneath. Once my hands are free, I grip and stroke him, trying to mimic what he was doing to himself. “Is this right?”
Erick’s hands come back to my face, one wrapped around the back of my neck, the other cupping my jaw. “Fucking hell, Kylian. Yes, that's perfect.”
I beam under his approval and take him as deep as I can again, this time closing my lips and hollowing my cheeks to suck him like I would a popsicle.
Right now, I’m wishing I’d had more sexual conversations with Lana and Alyssa and asked them questions, and had been unembarrassed about my curiosity and inexperience.
I should’ve been practicing for my future mate.
Not that I ever believed I would have one.
It takes no time to establish a rhythm, my mouth and hand moving in unison to envelop his full length. Erick wraps his hand around mine and squeezes my fingers around the shaft. “You don’t have to be gentle. When I’m hard like this, you can be as rough as you like.”
“I won’t hurt you?”
“Fates no.”
I grip him harder and move my thumb to the underneath of his shaft. Erick has his hands in my hair, his fingers flexing against my scalp, as a low groan reverberates in his chest. There’s something unbelievably powerful about having him completely at my mercy, his body vibrating with desire for me.
Specifically me.
Only me.
His mate.
He sucks in his breath and fists my hair, pulling me off of him. “Enough, babygirl. That’s enough for now.”
“Don’t you want to, uh—” I blush and bite my lip, embarrassed by the question. Dammit, why am I embarrassed to ask my mate if he wants to come? I’ve never done this before but I understand the basics and know the goal is to come.
The goal is always to come.
“Not right now, not like this.” He tucks his hard cock into his jeans, pushing his erection down at an angle that looks uncomfortable.
“Why?” I ask as Erick pulls me to my feet.
He grabs my leggings and kneels in front of me, helping me step in with one foot and then the other before pulling them up my legs. “The first time I come with you will be when I claim you and you claim me as your mate.”
“Oh.”
Erick leans in and places a sweet kiss on my lips before pulling back to yank his t-shirt over his head. “But first I need to feed you and then we’re getting your bear to come out and play.”
I grin. “Do you have a plan?”
He waggles his brow and nods. “I have a plan.”