Chapter 13 Calli
CALLI
Iwalk up to the secluded table inside my family's restaurant. Ares sits at the head, Katerina at his side, and I slide into the seat opposite her, still smoothing my dress down over my thighs.
"Look who finally made time for us," Ares says, setting down his wine glass with a smile. "All your training and travel, I was starting to think you forgot where home was."
I force a laugh and take a sip of wine. "I've just been trying to make the most of my time before the retreat. Lots to prepare for." I smile and set down the glass, focusing on the candlelight. Anywhere but Ares's searching gaze.
"The retreat," Katerina says. "Remind me again where this is happening?"
"Rome. Women's self-defense training. Kickboxing, basic survival-type stuff. I want to put my best foot forward."
"And you have to go to Rome for this?" Ares asks.
"Yes. It's important to me. I like them. They're empowering, you know. Learning to protect yourself."
"I think it's wonderful, Calli," Katerina says, glancing at Ares. "Especially after what happened to us."
Ares's jaw ticks. He doesn't like when we bring up that day, the day that pushed me to even learn about defending myself in the first place.
It’s been one thing after another lately.
Theo’s wedding already feels like a lifetime ago, all speeches and champagne, pretending we were just a normal family for one night.
Then, not long after, Dimitri was taken.
I didn’t breathe until I heard he was someplace safe.
I still haven’t spoken to him, but my brothers assure me he’s fine and off doing…
something. Status quo for them, keeping me in the dark.
"That new?" Ares asks, pointing to my neck.
I freeze for a fraction of a second.
My hand flies to my collarbone, fingertips brushing against the platinum necklace that hangs delicately from my neck.
"Oh. Yeah. Just something I picked up downtown at a boutique shop." The lie slips out smoothly. All the sneaking around have made deception too easy.
In truth, I've been wearing it every day since Niko gave it to me the night we said goodbye in Boston. The same weekend he gave me my collar.
Since I couldn't obviously wear that one in public, he got me this—platinum chain, one-carat center diamond, encircled by a halo of smaller stones.
The diamond was me, he said. The ring around it, his invisible collar.
A quiet mark of ownership. My reminder of who I belong to.
I haven't taken it off since he placed it around my neck eight weeks ago.
During that time, my brother has to have seen it, but now he brings it up.
"It's beautiful," Katerina says, her voice light, but when I glance at her, her eyes are telling me she isn't buying it.
"Thank you," I manage, taking another sip of wine to hide my discomfort. The diamond shifts against my skin, and instead of the coolness it normally feels, it's hot. Dangerously hot.
I'm worried what they'll say next, and thankfully Ares's phone buzzes on the table. He glances at it, frowns slightly. "Excuse me, I need to take this." He stands, squeezing Katerina's shoulder as he passes, and steps away.
The moment he's far enough away, Katerina shifts her drink out of the way and leans forward.
"Are you okay?" she asks.
"What? Me? Of course!"
"You've been off lately, Calli," she says, keeping her voice soft. "Distant. You barely texted me back this week."
I try to laugh it off. "I've just been busy," I say, shifting in my chair. "Training's been a lot. Plus I've got that retreat coming up and you've got your hands full with the baby, so I didn't want to bother you."
"That's your go-to now? Training and my baby?" Her brow arches, amused and skeptical. Clearly not buying it.
I offer a smile, but something inside me tightens. I look down at the basket of bread.
My mind flickers, uninvited, to the past eight weeks.
Sneaking out, slipping away under the excuse of "early morning sparring" or "late-night conditioning" to meet Niko in parking garages and luxury hotel rooms.
Or that one time Dimitri almost caught us.
Almost saw me getting out of Niko's car.
Dimitri thought he was picking me up from a boxing session, but I didn't even go inside.
I was with Niko, in his back seat. Thankfully, a messy, disheveled look with flushed cheeks matches what I'd look like after working out.
I wish I could tell her everything. Tell her about the weeks falling for someone harder than I meant to in secret. But I can't. I don't want her in that position, keeping things from my brother.
"Calli? Earth to Calli?"
"Sorry," I say, forcing a soft laugh. "Didn't sleep well last night."
"Mmm." She eyes me, and for a second, I wonder if she's figured it out. How much does she know? Or maybe I'm just paranoid because I'm so used to lying lately.
She leans back in her chair, folds her arms. "Look, I love you like a sister. You know that, right?"
I nod. "Of course, and same."
"And I'm not trying to push. But something's up. I can feel it. You don't have to tell me what it is. Just, be careful."
I glance down, avoiding her gaze. "I am."
"Ares is starting to notice," she adds. "He asked me the other night if something was up with you. Said you've been—"
Before she can finish, Ares returns, phone tucked back into his pocket. "Sorry about that. Business." He sits down, reaching for his wine. "What did I miss?"
"Nothing," I say too quickly. "Just girl talk."
When the food comes, I barely eat. My stomach is upset and knotted, just like it's been all day dreading this dinner. I've found it's been easier to avoid everyone than be in situations like this, where I have to bend the truth.
I try to be my usual bubbly self, but I have this nagging voice in my head that they aren't buying it. Or Katerina is seeing right through it. My brothers, I could skirt the line a bit. But another woman? That's hard.
I'm relieved when dinner's over and we part ways, taking separate cars back to the Kastaris estate with me promising to have lunch with Katerina next week.
My driver takes the scenic route. I don't speak. I normally do, but not tonight. It's okay. Ryan understands. He was one of my father's men before Ares took over, and he's never been chatty so he's probably thankful for the silence.
I hate lying to Katerina, especially since this involves her cousin.
Hate brushing off Ares. But what do I say?
That I'm sleeping with someone you'd never approve of or that you may even consider an enemy?
That I wear his collar in bed and his diamond around my neck in public?
That I care for him so much I'm starting to question if I lov—
God, do I? I can't even think about it right now. But there is something that hangs between us, unspoken but present in every touch, every secret meeting, every risk we take to be together.
I just. Ugh, I want to get home.
By the time Ryan pulls through the gates and drives up to my house on the estate, my head is pounding. I mumble thanks and hurry inside.
In my room, I peel off my coat and kick off my heels, heading straight for the closet and getting into my pajamas. I crawl into bed, exhausted but too wired to sleep. My hand reaches for my phone on the nightstand.
It buzzes just as I pick it up. Happiness sparks in my chest.
But it's not Niko. It's an alert from my period tracking app. I go to swipe it away but I do a double-take as I read it. I shake my head and read it again, bringing it closer to my face as if the words will change.
"You're in full flow. Be kind to yourself."
My stomach drops. I sit up, suddenly wide awake.
No. No, no, no.
I open the app, swipe back, look at my calendar, go back to the app.
Late.
I'm four days late.
I'm never late. Not on the pill. This has to be wrong. Maybe I mislogged something.
I jump out of bed and check the pill pack I've been carrying around in my purse.
Shit.
I'm on the sugar pills.
But I never miss. Not once. Except, maybe?
God, I've been so distracted. The secrecy. The sex. The stress. The travel.
I've been nauseous. But I thought that was nerves. Or the new supplements. Or maybe guilt, hiding from my family, lying to my brother and his wife over fucking appetizers.
I squeeze my boobs. They're sore. But, I start pacing. Are they sore from me squeezing them or because I'm pregnant?
I run to the mirror and lift my shirt. My stomach looks the same. My boobs don't look fuller. Would they? No, no, right?
How the hell would I know? I've never been pregnant.
I pull my shirt down and sit on the edge of my bed.
"Please don't let this be real. I can't deal with this right now," I say out loud as if it'll change anything that may or may not be happening.
I grab my necklace and feel everything. The fear, the uncertainty, the longing for Niko that never seems to fade no matter how many miles or days separate us.
I can't lose him. Not yet. Not like this. So I won't say anything. Not tonight. Not until I'm sure.
It's just stress. Stress does crazy things to your body. Yeah, just stress. My phone buzzes again and I look at it.
Niko.
God, why couldn't it have just been him earlier and not that stupid notification?