Chapter 15 Calli
CALLI
It's been four days since that stupid app pinged me with the words,
You're in full flow. Be kind to yourself.
Except, I'm not. No flow. No nothing. And I'm not being kind to myself, either.
I've been spiraling.
It could be stress. It could be nerves. But it also could be the one thing I can't even bring myself to say out loud.
Every time I try to think the word pregnant, my mind blanks out like it's been hit with a power outage.
And so instead, I've chosen to live in the smart realm of not-knowing, in a limbo of panic and denial.
I know it's bad, but ugh. Like what the hell.
I dodged Keira for two days and she threatened to tell all my brothers on me if I didn't respond.
I can't FaceTime her. She knows me too well.
The last time I tried to hide something big from her, like when I lost my virginity, she knew something was up in the first thirty seconds of seeing me.
She's too good, but I know If anyone could help me figure this out without judgment, it would be Keira.
But not yet.
Also, I've been a bit snappy at everyone lately. Even the barista at my favorite coffee shop who added whipped cream to my latte felt some of it.
Mind you, it was whipped cream I normally love but now makes me nauseous.
Just like the smell of my brother's cologne. And the salmon my chef prepared yesterday.
I know I can't live in this void of not knowing. I'm going to have to figure this out.
A knock at my bedroom door makes me jump.
"Just a minute!"
I get out of bed and open my door.
Katerina stands there looking annoyingly fresh and put-together in white linen pants and a blue blouse, holding her baby.
"Pack a bag," she says without preamble.
I shake my head. "What?"
"Pack a bag," she repeats, smiling, already moving past me into my room. "Nothing fancy. Casual clothes, one nice outfit for dinner."
"What are you talking about?"
"Ares and I are flying to Athens for a few days. He's got business, we've got wine to drink, and some exploring to do."
"Wait, what? I can't. I've got... I've got things going on," I protest weakly. "Training, and—"
"Training can wait," she says, perfectly mimicking Ares's authoritative tone. "Come on, Calli. The nanny's coming too, so we'll have a little girl time. Food, sunshine, history. And if you're lucky, a Greek man to flirt with."
She winks.
"Gosh," I say, trying to look like I'm considering it. "I just have some things to do."
She sighs. "Ares said you have to come. No excuses. But it'll be fun. I miss you, Calli."
The way she looks at me, I can't say no. That and Ares will probably drag me to the airport if I say no.
And maybe I can surprise Niko somehow. He's back there this week.
"Okay, girl," I say, putting on a smile, "You're right. I could use some fun!"
"Yay," Katerina says, lifting the baby up and down. Sweet giggles fill my room.
"Okay, I'll pack. When do we leave?"
"Car's coming in one hour. Jet's waiting for us," she says, making a sorry face.
"One hour?!"
"I know, I know," Katerina says. "Ares just told me this morning and then said he was going to tell you and I said I would, and, well, here I am," she continues with a big smile.
"Okay," I say softly. "I'll pack and be ready in an hour."
When we touch down in Athens it feels a bit different. Normally we fly into Kalamata, but Ares has things to do here. Theo's meeting him and Dimitri might be as well.
It's to do with our dad's murder. Ares has decided for me that they're going to keep me out of everything until they know who did it for sure. It's fine with me, especially now. I've got my own stuff going on and I don't need to be looped in on every little detail.
Because, I don't even know how I could help.
It's mid-morning when we pull up to the hotel and get out. It's warm and blindingly bright. The kind of sunlight that makes even the most heavily graffitied walls look romantic in retrospect.
The air smells like bread, grilled meat, and old stone. And for a brief, blissful moment, I forget everything that's running through my head.
Our hotel is tucked just a few blocks from Plaka, the old historical neighborhood of Athens, overlooking the Acropolis. The view from the suite's balcony makes it feel like we're living inside a postcard.
We get settled in quickly. Ares wastes no time. Within an hour of checking in, he's already on the phone, organizing whatever mysterious business pulled him here.
Meanwhile, Katerina's going over last minute details with the nanny.
I don't know what we're doing, but I'm sure we'll be leaving soon. I suppose that's good. Issues follow you no matter where you go, so I'll worry sitting here in Athens just as I would back in Chicago.
"Come on," Katerina says, interrupting my thoughts. "We're doing the full tourist circuit today. Nanny's got the baby, and I want a sweaty selfie at the Parthenon."
I laugh, but my stomach's twisting in a thousand knots. Still no period. Still no answers. And now I'm back in the same city as Niko, who has no idea the secret I may have growing inside me.
And even if I wanted to avoid him, I can't. Being so close, my need for him will grow and I'll break and text him. I've almost done it three times since landing.
We exit the hotel and make our way through the people and head up the path and stone steps. The Parthenon looks beautiful against the cloudless bright blue sky. Tourists crowd around, snapping photos and listening to guides explain the ancient history.
Katerina drags me to a spot with the best view, pulls me close, and raises her phone.
"Gosh it's hot," I say, brushing the hair out of my face to get ready for the shot. "Looks like you'll get your sweaty pictures after all."
She laughs. "Smile."
We take a dozen selfies, Katerina meticulously checking each one.
"One more," she says, adjusting her angle.
I oblige, but my mind is elsewhere, scanning the crowds. Is he here somewhere? Watching? Does he know I'm in Athens already?
He's pretty good at showing up just when I least expect it. It's actually one of the things I find exciting about him.
"Perfect," Katerina says, satisfied. "Give me your phone. I'll take a few of just you."
I pose awkwardly, trying to look carefree. Katerina takes a few pictures and then hands me my phone. "Beautiful as always. I'll airdrop you the others now or I'll forget."
As she's selecting the images to send me, I open my messages to Niko and before I can stop myself, I type out: Guess where I am?
I attach the best image Katerina just took of me and hit send before I can overthink it.
His reply comes seconds later. And just like I secretly wanted, he tells me he's coming to Athens. To see me.
I stare at the screen, a mixture of excitement and dread pooling in my stomach because I have no idea how I'm going to make it work.
"There," Katerina says, looking at my phone. "Did you get them?"
I accept the airdrop quickly. "Yep."
"Wait. Who are you texting?"
"Keira," I lie, locking my phone. "She's envious of me being here."
Katerina links her arm through mine. "Oh, well come on. We've got some more to see and I want to stop by the agora and get something for the baby. Maybe fight off a yiayia for the last bunch of dried lavender."
I start laughing. "You wouldn't."
"No, but it's funny to think so," she says with a wink, pulling me forward laughing.
After walking around town, seeing all the tourist stops, wandering through the museum, and stopping to share some souvlaki, we finally arrive at the Athens Central Market, Varvakios.
It's loud and chaotic in the best possible way. This place sells everything from fish to hand-stitched leather sandals.
Men shout in Greek and English to people walking by, trying their best to prove why their stall is the best.
"Okay, I'm going to go find baby blankets. I won't bore you with that. Take a look around and I'll text you when I'm done," Katerina says.
"You sure?" I ask.
"Yes. Plus there's bound to be a nice Greek guy here for you," she says, smiling and elbowing my arm.
"Love you, have fun," she continues and walks off, disappearing into the crowd.
The agora is alive and well. People are everywhere. I start walking, passing a stall where a man is blasting Greek music while selling knockoff perfumes.
Another is selling octopus on ice and meat hangs from every direction, along with baskets of fresh and dried herbs.
Jars of olives and bottles of olive oil are as far as the eye can see, broken only by cheap toys and feta floating in liquid.
I haven't been here in some time. I forget just walking through is an experience on its own.
I glance at my phone. It's been hours since Niko said he was coming.
Is he going to text soon? Is he already here in Athens? What if he got held up and couldn't come?
I pass by a table full of baby sweaters and my hand runs across the fabric unconsciously.
Could there really be a baby growing inside me? Niko's baby?
I pull my hand away quickly and look around, fearing Katerina is nearby.
She isn't, and I don't even know if she would have noticed my gesture, but still. I don't want to risk anything.
A man approaches me and waves a pack of dried figs in my face as he tells me in Greek they're from his small village.
"Ochi, efharistó," I say with a smile. He doesn't stop, so I repeat it in English, "No, thank you." He still comes at me so I duck around him and walk away without looking back.
I walk around aimlessly for a few more minutes, thinking that the chaos of people around me is exactly how my mind feels.
Suddenly, a warm hand grabs mine and tugs. I'm pulled between two stalls, into a narrow space between canvas walls. I gasp as my heart races and familiar dark eyes meet mine.
"Miss me?" Niko asks, his voice low and mischievous.
"Are you insane?" I say, looking around frantically, but no one's paying attention to us.
"A little," he says with a smile, as his hands cup my face. "But that's never stopped me before."
And then his mouth is on mine, hot and demanding. I should push him away. We're in public. My brother could show up. Katerina could be nearby. This is madness.
Instead, I kiss him back, desperate and hungry. My hands clutch his shirt, and he backs me against the canvas wall, wrapping his arms around my waist.
When he pulls back, the kiss feels rushed. Frantic. Too brief.
I brush the hair out of my face.
"What are you doing here?" I say, half in panic, half in pure, traitorous relief.
"I told you I was coming. I had to see you."
"Yes, but like... I thought we'd plan something. I mean," I stop and look around, "I'm here with your cousin who could be just around the corner. If she sees us like this, she'll tell Ares."
"Let her," he says, not even pretending to care. "Let him try and keep me from you."
"Niko," I hiss, but then his mouth is on mine and I melt into it. God, I hate how right this feels.
"I've missed you," he says against my lips. "You've no idea how much."
"I've missed you too."
"I see you're wearing my necklace."
"Of course," I grab it and start playing with it.
I stop and shake my head. "Shit, Niko. I need to go. This is too—"
"I need to see you alone. Tonight."
My body responds to his touch, heat pooling low in my belly. "I don't... Okay, okay. I'll find a way."
He kisses me again, and it takes everything I have to pull away.
I smile at him as I fix my clothes, hair, and wipe any smudges of lipstick from my lips.
"I'll text you," I say and turn. He grabs me, wrapping his arms around me.
"Niko," I say playfully, "let go. I have to leave, crazy."
He lets me go and we walk out from between the stalls.
"Calli! There you are."
Shit.
Katerina's voice is close. Too close.
Panic surges through me. I try to get away from Niko, but it's too late. Katerina rounds the corner and stops dead, her eyes widening as she sees him.
"Niko?" she says, surprised. "Oh my god, what are the odds?" She hugs him.
I force an awkward, unnecessary laugh, stepping aside. "Right? I just asked him the same thing. Ran into him back there near the fish stand. Random. Totally random."
Reel it in, Calli.
Niko nods, slipping into the lie with practiced ease. "Yeah. The chef is prepping a dinner for some guests. My father wants it perfect, you know, so I thought I'd pick up a few things myself just to make sure."
Katerina rolls her eyes. "Yes, I remember how dear uncle Stavros can be."
"Yes, still a prick as always," Niko says.
Katerina laughs. "Some things never change."
"I know, huh," I say, trying to act calm.
"Such a small world, running into you," Katerina says slowly.
"Yes, so small," I say, laughing.
God, I'm not good at hiding things in the moment.
Niko looks at me and then back at Katerina, turning on his charm. "So, what about you two? Athens vacation?"
"Kind of," Katerina says. "Ares had meetings, so we're just tagging along," she says. "We're here a few days."
"Oh, that sounds fun," he says, glancing down at me.
"Yes, well. If you ever come to Chicago, call me. I want you to come and meet the baby," Katerina says.
"I will," Niko adds. "It would be good to catch up. It's been a while."
"Yes, absolutely," Katerina says, and looks at me. "Well, we should go."
"Yes, we should," I say, nodding too enthusiastically.
"Yeah, I should probably get going myself," Niko says and looks at me. "Enjoy your stay in Athens, ladies."
I watch as he walks away and then turn to look at Katerina, who's staring at me.
"Weird coincidence, huh?" she asks.
I force a smile. "Like you said. Small world, right?"
We start walking and she turns to me.
"He's always been a little. I don't know. Hard to read, you know? I haven't been able to crack that shell.”
I swallow hard. "I hadn't noticed. You guys seem to connect easily."
She gives me a look.
"Well, let's head back. Ares texted me. He's set up a surprise for all of us."
I smile and nod, but inside I'm unraveling. If Katerina knows, suspects, or is picking up on it, Ares won't be far behind. And if they find out, it won't just be my heart that breaks, it'll be his too, and a whole lot more.