Chapter 7
The next day Maisy went in to work and spent the time packing up. She had no idea she’d acquired so many things. She made two categories: what the school paid for and what she’d bought. Some of her purchases might be useful if she got the job at the elementary school. Her interview was today at noon. Jackson had told the staff they were free to make their own hours. All the while she prayed he wouldn’t come to see her.
Annie did, though. “Need some help?”
“No, I’m only taking what I bought. I’ll leave most things for the next person you guys hire.”
“Ah. Feeling any better today?”
She folded her arms across her waist. “Yes. I should have called you last night. I’m sorry.”
“How’d it go with Jackson?”
“Not well. I left not long after you did.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
She thought of something pleasant to say. “I went to the first Foster Care Support Group last night.”
“That’s exciting. I heard Gemma Kendrick is teaching one of the sessions.”
“I’m sure it’ll be great. The moderator had us introduce ourselves and one of the participants is a principal from Westwood Elementary. He, um, asked me to come in for an interview. They have an at-risk class.”
“Maisy, I’m happy for you.”
“You weren’t yesterday.”
“Diego made me see I was going to lose you either way. If you got together with Jackson, you’d have to leave Pathways. If things went south with you two, you’d leave anyway though I’d prefer the former. So, I am happy for you. What time is the interview?”
“Noon. Jackson said we could make our own hours. But I’m probably not coming back.”
“I understand. He’s interviewing for your job.”
“Already?”
“Hmm.”
All morning, she tried not to think about Jackson picking someone to replace her. And the packing made her sad. She’d found a home here. At eleven forty-five, Maisy hugged Annie goodbye and left the campus. The elementary school was closer to her house than Pathways, so she reached it a few minutes early. She studied the building from the car. The school had been remodeled last year. She knew because she’d voted for the city to do the project. It was painted a nice terracotta and she could see that the doors and windows were new also.
Inside she followed directions to the principal’s office. His secretary told her he was ready for her and opened his door. “Maisy Shepherd is here, George.”
“Have her come right in.”
He stood. He was a big man, almost as tall as Jackson. “Hi, Maisy. Let’s both have a seat at the table over there.”
When they were settled, he asked, “So, you’re interested in the job?”
“Yes. Tell me about the kids.”
“We go to sixth grade here. The oldest students have been a…problem for a few years. Last year, we started a separate class for ten of them, and that’s worked better than when they were in other bigger classrooms.”
“In what way? Describe their behavior.”
“It runs from not staying in their seats to disrupting class to stealing. Academically, they just make passing.”
“Do you promote them to the next level automatically? I know some grade schools do that.”
“No, we don’t. Also, we don’t have tests. Everyone in the school is evaluated by portfolio.”
“Even math and science?”
“We have some innovative methods in those disciplines but need to do more.”
“We used portfolios at Pathways for every subject. Maybe I can contribute to the disciplines that are struggling for ideas.”
“I was hoping you would.”
They reviewed the curriculum. Then he handed her the contract. “I’m afraid we can’t afford what Jackson Kane paid you.”
“Let’s see.” Her compensation and benefits were lower than what she was getting at Pathways, but that didn’t matter. Her sanity did. And Caleb would be earning more money if he went to full time counseling.
After an hour, she sat back. “I understand the program and hope you got to know me professionally. I’ll wait for a call—either way, please.” When she started to stand, he said, “If your references are positive, the job’s yours if you want.”
Annie, Adam and Jackson were her references. Jackson would know. So be it.
She sat back down. “I want it.”
* * *
Annie said, “We’re down to three choices to fill the position.”
“I’m, um, thinking about searching for others again.”
She touched Jackson’s arm. “None of them are Maisy. I realize that. But we have to start interviewing.”
He sat back and drew a breath. “This is hard.”
“It is. For me too.”
He shook off his mood. “Of course it’s hard for you, Annie. I’m sorry for forgetting that.”
“That’s okay. Can we decide to interview these three?”
“Sure. I’ll call them.”
She stood. “The school will be all right, Jackson.”
“I know. Thanks for helping with this. I’ll let you know when they’re coming in.”
“I’ll make myself available.”
As soon as she left, the phone rang. He didn’t recognize the caller ID. “Jackson Kane.”
“Mr. Kane, this is George Patterson from Westwood Elementary School.”
“Yes, Mr. Patterson. What can I do for you?”
“I’m calling for a reference for Maisy Shepherd.”
His heart clutched. “Excuse me?”
“Maisy Shepherd is applying for a job at my school.”
“She put me down for a reference?”
“Of course. Why is something wrong with that?”
“No, no. I’m just sorry to see her leave.”
“Teachers need a change sometimes. She’s been with you for six years.”
“Yes, she has. In any case, I can highly recommend Maisy as a teacher.”
“Would you give me a few examples of why?”
“Yes.”
For twenty minutes, he was forced to sing her praises. What a loss for Pathways. He felt even worse after he hung up. Just this week, Joe had urged him to admit his feelings. Let them out. Damn it, why did things end this way? Why couldn’t she follow the rules? He was mad. He was hurt. Admitting that made him feel better.
He had to get it together. He couldn’t keep up this seesaw of emotions. He had to find his equilibrium. And he would. Before he called the three candidates, he went out for a walk. He’d dressed down in jeans and a collared shirt, like he told the teachers to do. Then he came back and sat down at his desk to call the two women and one man who might work at his school next year.
* * *
Caleb and Maisy were ready to leave the house for the second class on foster care. Freddie hugged them and the sitter bade them goodbye. “I think you two are good people to take in Freddie. He’s adorable, but still, kudos to you.”
He glanced at his sister as they drove to the town hall. She was happy her new job came through. She’d enjoyed her time with Freddie the rest of the day. Caleb was glad to see her bounce back some.
“It’s nice to see you smile, Maise.”
“We did the right thing with him.”
“It bothers me that he could still get adopted. And who knows how long you and I will live together?”
“Don’t talk about that now.” She glanced over at him. “I love living with you.”
“Same here, kiddo.”
Though Caleb was functioning six months after the bombing and coping with the betrayal of his wife and his friend, he felt a deep-down depression that he kept from other people. For all the advice he’d given to Diego, he couldn’t seem to move on from what happened to him. The notion made him sad.
And he missed God.
They arrived at the town hall, walked inside, found the designated room and took seats. Maisy leaned over. “You’re going to love Gemma. She’s so great with the boys at Pathways.”
“I’m sure I will.”
When she came into the room, Caleb’s mouth dropped.
“What’s wrong?”
“You didn’t tell me how gorgeous she is.”
“I’m used to her looks I guess.”
Today she wore a tailored summer suit. The dark pinkish top was secured by one button. Its piping accented by the metal- gray skirt. On her feet were two-inch heels. Though he routinely objected to women stuffing their feet into those torturous things, he had to admit they were sexy as hell.
Sexy? What had gotten into him?
Luke asked for everyone’s attention. “You’re in for a treat today, friends. Dr. Gemma Kendrick is an experienced psychiatrist, well-published in the field of adolescence behavior. She’s been working at Pathways since it opened. And a recent article online declares that she works miracles at the school .”
Sitting next to him, Gemma nodded at Luke. “Thank you for asking me to speak to you.” Then she scanned the others. “I’m a big proponent of foster care, particularly the kind that leads to adoption.” Maisy and Caleb exchanged glances. “Let me tell you why that’s so important.”
He wondered if he and Maisy could adopt Freddie. Wouldn’t she eventually marry someone and leave him to live alone for the rest of his life?
“I’d like to start with the first two things on your topic list. Making a connection with your child and how to deal with your children missing their birth parents. I encourage class participation. I’m assuming you’ve all made some connection with your child by now. How did you do that?”
Answers ranged from letting the child play with your biological children to physical touching and hugging. At that point Gemma said, “Before you do the latter, you have to be sure he or she wants your contact.”
A man raised his hand. “Our child was sexually assaulted by her birth father. Truthfully, I’m afraid to touch her.”
“You have to take that situation slowly.” Gemma’s voice was full of sympathy. “Does she let anyone touch her?”
“No.”
At the same time, his wife said, “Yes.”
Gemma waited.
His wife added, “She hugged me when we made cookies together and then again when we went shopping for new shoes.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” the man asked.
“Because I thought you’d feel bad.”
“There’s something to be learned from this,” Gemma put in. “Parents should be honest with each other.”
Caleb was keeping some things from Maisy, but that had nothing to do with Freddie.
“Any others on how to deal with this issue?”
Caleb spoke up. “I’d sit down with the child and be honest. Tell her that’s a concern. Try to get her to see it’s because she was abused. And not all men are abusers. One other thing, if I may?”
“Of course, go ahead.”
“You have to be patient. Don’t push her. But do things with her, like your wife does. Just the two of you. What does she like?”
“Cooking shows.”
“Then watch them with her. Maybe take one of the recipes on TV and make it with her.”
“I’m a pretty good cook.”
“There, that’s perfect.”
Gemma smiled approvingly. “Thank you, sir, for your significant insights.”
The compliment, coming from someone of her caliber, sparked a bit of joy inside him. He basked in it.
After class ended, Gemma walked over to where Caleb and Maisy were seated. First she fussed over Maisy because she knew his sister was leaving Pathways. Then she read his name tag. “Caleb, do you have counseling experience?”
“Yes, I’m a certified psychologist.”
“Where do you practice?”
“I recently set up a small practice. I only have five clients. The office in my home has its own entrance and we’re on a quiet street.”
“Did you ever think of joining a larger practice?”
“Not right now. Things are complicated for me.”
“Ah. Well, if you ever decide you want to change things up, I can talk to you about it. I used to work in one and I can give you the pros and cons.” She took something out of a side pocket. “Here’s my card. Call me sometime. We’ll get together for coffee.”
On the way home, Maisy shook her head. “That’s probably the warmest I’ve ever seen Gemma. I think she liked you.”
“I like her, too.”
“You got her card, buddy. You can see her again.”
“I don’t think so, Maisy. I’m not sure I’ll ever get close to a woman again.”
“It’s pretty early to be sure of that. What happened to you wasn’t that long ago.”
“Yeah, maybe, but don’t play matchmaker, okay?”
“Okay. Anything you want.”
* * *
He kissed his way down Maisy’s body, thrilled by the pleasure touching her gave him. He stopped at her stomach and said, “Ah, sweetheart.”
“I love you, Jackson. I love you.”
He stopped abruptly. “You can’t love me, Maisy, because I can’t love anyone.”
Jackson awoke in a sweat. He was in bed. Alone. Breathing heavy and hard as a rock. Hell! His nightmare and flashbacks about the gang had disappeared and the dreams he had now were of Maisy. Sometimes, he didn’t know which he preferred. He was shaky, like now as he sat up, took a swig of water and leaned back against the headboard.
* * *
Jackson rose above her and entered her swiftly. She welcomed the pleasure it brought after so much foreplay. God, she loved this man. As he brought her up higher and higher, he said, “I love you, Maisy. I’ll always love you.”
“No, no, no….”
“Wake up Maisy. You’re having a bad dream…wake up honey.”
She grabbed onto strong arms. “Jackson…”
“No, sweetie, it’s me Caleb.” She awoke fully. “You were dreaming about Jackson.”
“Oh, fuck.”
“This is the third night in a row.”
“I can’t stop them.”
“Of course you can’t.”
“I—I…” Maisy couldn’t catch her breath.
“Breathe, Maise. Just breathe.”
Finally, she could take in air. How long could she live with these nightmares?
* * *
“Good morning, everyone. After a week off, I’m sure you’re ready for our summer program.”
The boys remained aloof. They blamed Jackson for Maisy leaving the school. They were right.
He ignored their reaction. “This is Lt. Diego Rodriguez. He’s a police officer with the WPD.”
Rumblings among them. “Pig…Popo…Five 0.”
It was exactly what Jackson would have done if, as a kid, he’d been forced into this kind of presentation. Luckily, he knew how to disarm them. “I think you’ll change your attitude when I tell you he’s Ms. Stefano’s husband.”
Shock. They mumbled, “Sorry…Oh…What the…” and more apologizing.
“I’ll leave the rest of it to you, Lieutenant.”
Dressed casually in jeans, docksiders and a simple white shirt, Diego meandered to the front of the room and Jackson went to the back. The kids sat at two tables, facing front because Diego was using the computer projector. “Your reaction just now? That’s the first thing I want to talk to you about. Labeling anybody, even police officers, is dangerous.”
Nothing but frowns.
“Tough crowd. Here’s a sheet of paper numbered 1-7. I’m going to show you images and you’re going to write the first thing that enters your mind. Don’t think about it.”
“#1 thug.”
They wrote.
“Number 2: Family.”
He showed all seven. When they finished, he hitched a hip on the table up front. “Let’s share what you wrote. How about thug.”
“Gangbangers.”
“The cops.”
“Us.”
Jackson smiled. The kids were going to be fine with Diego. He walked out of the classroom and his phone buzzed. “Hi, Annie.”
“Jackson. Are you busy?”
“I was in your husband’s session.”
“How’s he doing?”
“Great. Got the kids with him right away.”
“I’m glad to hear that.”
“What can I do for you?”
“I’ve picked who I want to replace Maisy.”
Replace Maisy? No one ever could. He backstopped his reaction.
“Send me the name. I’ll call him or her today.”
“Okay.” She hesitated. “You sound sad.”
She had no idea. “No, no, I’m not.”
“We can still get Maisy back. If you want to try.”
“She has another job.”
“It’s only May. She still has a choice where she’ll go in September.”
“No. I’ll wait for your email. Please Annie, don’t bring up Maisy again.”
* * *
When Maisy walked into the house, Freddie squealed. Caleb glanced up from a book they were reading. His eyebrows skyrocketed. “What’s all this?”
Freddie clambered down and raced to her. “Wow. Wow. A dog.” She squatted down and he put his face to the puppy’s head. She picked out a Yorkshire terrier. “Who’s he for?”
“You, honey.”
“Really?” Tears formed in his eyes. “I can keep him?” That he spoke with such awe drove home how much he’d missed in life. Did he ever even get a present?
“Yes, we can keep him.”
“What’s his name?”
“You get to decide.”
She stood when Caleb approached them and whispered to her, “We need to talk.”
“I know. But first I should get the dog things I bought out of my car.”
“I’ll do it. Stay and keep an eye on these two. Especially the puppy. He…”
The dog peed on the floor.
“Uh-oh.” Freddie’s face fell. “You aren’t going to take him away because he did that, are you?”
Maisy hunkered down. “No, never. We have to keep taking him out. Or maybe, periodically, we set him on a pee pad.”
When Caleb returned with several packages and set the small crate with open bars down, Freddie frowned. “You’re gonna put him in prison?”
“What?”
He pointed to the crate.
Caleb squelched a grin before he left to get the rest of the things. “A crate isn’t prison. It’s his home.”
“Yeah?”
“Dogs like their own space,” Maisy said. “He’s so little, though, we might want to put the bumper around the bars. And a pee pad for the bottom.”
After Freddie cuddled the dog, played a bit with him, Caleb came back. “I cleared a cupboard for the puppy stuff. Now, let’s put him in the crate so he can take a nap.”
“Can I lay down with him?”
Maisy got him a pillow and blanket from the couch. “Outside of the crate, of course.”
After they finished settling the two of them, Caleb pulled her back into the kitchen. “This is so not you. Buying a dog at all, but the fact that you didn’t consult me.”
“Oh, Caleb, I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. I love dogs. But this is about something else.”
Maisy shrugged. “I guess I thought this would be fun for us all. Everything’s been so grim lately.”
“Freddie might not get adopted by anyone because of the animal.”
“We’ll see.”
He slid his arm around her. “I think this is about Jackson.”
“How?”
“It’s a distraction from missing him. Honey, that’s not a good way to deal with your grief.”
“What do you mean, grief?”
“You’re mourning the end of your relationship with Jackson.”
Now, her eyes teared. “You think it’s over?”
“You told me it was.”
She burst into tears.
* * *
Jackson was sitting in his office and wondered what Maisy was doing. He’d been used to seeing her every day. He had to stop thinking about her.
Harry knocked and opened the door. “Jackson—"
A man burst into the office. Jackson stood.
The guy said, “I need to see you alone.”
Something niggled at him. The man seemed familiar. He had short dreadlocks and smooth caramel colored skin. He was a big guy with broad shoulders. His clothes were wrinkled and old. “Who are you?”
“Paulie Lomax.”
“Ah. Denzi’s brother.”
“Yeah.”
He nodded at Harry. “I’ll talk to him alone.”
“You sure?”
“Yes.”
Harry left the door open on his way out.
Jackson didn’t ask the man to sit. “What do you want?”
“I heard on the street what happened to her.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I know you had a chance to save her.”
Jackson’s insides froze. He swallowed hard. “I…I tried to get her out of that gang. But Marco had a hold on her.”
“So it’s true?”
“I begged her to come with me. I tried everything.”
Paulie turned and Jackson thought he was leaving but instead he slammed the door. Circled around. With a gun in his hand.
Fuck this. Jackson dove for the guy. The fall knocked his gun out of his hand. He got the guy by the legs, turned him face down. And put a knee in his back.
The door flew open and Nick and his team burst into the room. Harry stood behind them.
Jackson looked up. “Why’re you here?”
“I called them,” Harry said. “They were close by.”
“Why?”
Harry ducked his head. “I had a feeling something was off about the guy.”
Nick dropped down and cuffed the guy. Then dragged him up to stand. “I’ll take him to the cops.” They escorted the guy out.
Jackson stood. Harry closed the door behind them. “Are you all right?”
“A little sore.”
“You took matters into your own hands.”
“I had no choice. I didn’t know you called in the cavalry.”
“Sit down, Jackson.”
Jackson was glad to take a chair. He was shaky from all the adrenaline draining from his body now that the danger was over.
Harry sat across from him. “I think there’s more to it than you having no choice.”
“I don’t understand.”
“For days now you’ve been sullen and remote. I’m afraid the staff are reacting.”
“I’m fine.”
“No, you’re not. This incident makes me wonder if you didn’t care if you got hurt. Or worse.”
“Harry, I lived on the streets when I was young. Self-defense gets ingrained after a while.”
“I think you’re telling yourself that. But in my opinion, losing Maisy Shepherd from Pathways and your life has caused you to be reckless.”
“That’s not true.”
“Isn’t it?”
Jackson sat back. His accusation had to be false. Because if it was correct, it meant Jackson was in a very bad and a very dangerous place.