38. Piper #2
“Sovereign Sanctum?” I repeated the words as if it could bring me to understanding.
“Our secret society where we bring victims of heinous abuse to safety. Hide them away before we can give them new lives. And we get them there by any means necessary.”
A flashfire of everything I’d gleaned over the last several days blipped through my mind. The secret meetings, Emery’s covert words about them being involved in something deeper, and the way that Theo had acted around Alicia and Lucy.
The fear and overprotectiveness he seemed to watch them with.
The truth that I’d known Theo was truly dangerous.
And not just the surface kind.
This kind .
The kind where he had blood on his hands.
I could almost hear the ghosts of the bodies he’d brought to their end howl from the ink marked on his skin.
“Are you…” I paused, then whispered, “Part of some government agency?”
I already knew the answer.
Of course, I did.
Still, Theo’s expression went grim. “We could never take the measures required if we were.”
A shiver rocked through me as Theo continued, “Those monsters you just saw me end…”
Disgust spilled from his mouth.
There was no shame involved in this piece of his confession.
“One of them was Alicia’s husband. The other, I assume, was his guard. The bastard tormented her since she was a teenager. Groomed her from when she was fifteen then forced her into the most grievous, sick marriage. Hurt her again and again. We got her out.”
Horror rolled through his body. “Somehow he uncovered where we brought her.”
Theo leaned in closer, and his words started to rush. “He was here to destroy her, Piper, either by taking her life or forcing her back into the atrocities that he’d been inflicting. I wasn’t about to let that happen. I didn’t have another choice.”
My heart thrashed at my ribs, and my attention flashed back to where River helped Alicia back into the cabin.
A babel of motorcycles echoed in the distance, coming closer.
No question, the rest of the guys were on their way.
My chest heaved and shook as I tried to make sense of it all.
“And even if I did, I’m not sure that I would take it back.” Theo’s voice curled with the remnants of violence.
The man offering me his truth.
He was a killer.
I struggled to draw the air into my deflated lungs.
“This is…what you do.” It tremored out of me. I didn’t know if it was an accusation or a question.
“Yes. The Sanctuary is where we temporarily hide those under our protection until we can get them new identities and moved to their new homes. It’s where we allow them time to come to terms with the fact that they can never go back to their old lives.”
“How many?” Why was I asking this? Pressing deeper into the dark vapor that surrounded him?
Moonlit eyes whirled, sucking me down into his abyss as he slowly released my wrists.
As if he were asking me to trust him.
To understand him.
To see him.
“How many women and children have we gotten to safety or do you want to know how many fiends I’ve put in the ground?”
My insides trembled, and I forced out the sticky words. “Women and children.”
I couldn’t handle the other. Not with the way sickness roiled in my stomach and nausea crawled up my throat.
“A lot. Over a hundred and fifty at least, I would imagine.”
The din of motorcycles roared through the night.
Coming closer and closer.
A moment later, three of them came around the bend. They skidded to a stop in front of the cabin.
A small white BMW pulled in behind them.
Kane, Otto, and Cash swung off their bikes, shadowy beasts that stalked through the night, each heading in different directions like they understood whatever job was theirs to tackle.
The door of the car opened, and Raven climbed out.
Dread and compassion billowed from her spirit.
She paused for a moment where she stood in the opening.
I wondered if she could feel me staring at her because her attention traveled to me.
Her pretty face was set in both softness and determination.
Unafraid and unashamed.
Bared and open.
Inviting me into this sordid world that I couldn’t fathom.
Or maybe part of me could fathom it.
The part of me that wanted to lean into Theo and beg him to stand for me, too.
A sympathetic smile teetered at Raven’s mouth before she pulled away, closed her car door, and strode up the walk and into Alicia’s cabin.
No question, she had been summoned to comfort her.
To support her.
Uncertainty rocketed through me. Torn between the fear and wanting to give into something so hazardous and horrible, while another part of me recognized the sacrifice they made.
This lifestyle.
The danger they had to constantly be in.
Up against the people like Theo had left dead this evening.
Up against the law.
It felt like that danger was coming to fruition when headlights blinked through the foliage, and an SUV slowly rounded the corner and came to a stop behind Raven’s car.
I could make out the long row of lights on the top.
A sheriff.
“Theo.” Panic gushed out with his name.
Fear for him manifesting in a beat.
Theo grabbed my trembling arms to steady me. It sent a bolt of lightning streaking below the surface of my flesh.
His words were low as he rushed, “That’s Colt Astersen. Town Sheriff. He knows who we are and what we do. We normally leave him out of our dealings, but this one might be messy.”
The sheriff climbed out of his SUV and ambled for River who loitered at the end of the patio.
Theo warred, his gaze sliding between me and the hurried, secreted frenzy that emanated from across the way.
Everyone working to quickly cover what had happened.
Theo sighed, and both his hands lightly curled around my forearms, intensity rolling off him as he gazed into the distance. “Need you to go inside, Piper. I need to help clean this up.”
He swiveled his attention back to me. “We can talk more about it once I’m finished.”
My entire being flailed.
It felt like everything I’d feared was right there, catching up to me, but multiplied by a thousand.
All while my spirit thrashed inside me. Reaching out and begging for him to hold the weight of my traumas.
Could I trust him?
Would he face my demons?
Would he hold my pain and my shame?
What would happen if I allowed him to see?
Would I have to go into hiding? Not the kind of hiding that I’d been doing, which was more running than anything. But would Finn, Nelly, and I have to become someone else?
Dread compressed my chest.
He reached for my face, and I didn’t realize I was crying until he let his thumb slide up my cheek to gather a tear.
I swallowed around the barbed wire in my throat. “I don’t know if I can do this, Theo. I don’t know if I can…”
“Piper.”
I gulped around the pain that lashed through his expression. The giving that we both came up to earlier this evening crushed with this truth.
“I…I need some time.” The words croaked out of me.
“Don’t run from me, Piper. Please don’t fuckin’ run from me.”
My eyes squeezed closed. “I’m not sure I know how to stay.”
He didn’t try to stop me when I turned and fumbled for the door. My hands would barely cooperate as I dug into my pocket to get my keycard.
I pressed it to the reader. It beeped and the lock disengaged, and I gasped out in pain and relief when it gave.
I slipped in through the crack, my breaths heaving as I rested my back against the door when it snapped shut behind me.
Only there was no peace in the barrier it created.
Nothing that shielded me from the power of Theo’s presence.
I could feel him through the wood.
Tendrils weaving through the cracks.
I forced myself to move, and I staggered up the stairs.
Lightheadedness rushed me as I stood in the middle of the open doorway.
Puffs of Finn’s little breaths filled the room.
His soul at rest while I’d never been so distraught.
My feet itched with the urge to run.
To just go.
I guess I’d never been so good at facing my problems.
But these were the kind of problems that were insurmountable.
And the only battle tactic I knew was running from them.
I stumbled forward and dropped to my knees so I could drag the suitcase out from where I had it stored underneath, frantic as I tossed it open in the middle of the floor.
On my knees beside it, I stared at the emptiness inside. A reflection of me.
I tried to force myself back up to standing.
To move.
To pack our things so we could leave at first light.
Instead, I reached back under the bed and pulled out the duffel.
Through bleary eyes, I stared at it before I finally worked the code into the lock and peeled back the zipper.
I pulled out the sweaters and set them on the floor, dug through the money and the locked case with the jewelry, then I pulled out my sketchbook.
With my vision blurred, I flipped through the pages like it might take me back to that time.
Like I might be given the chance to make a different choice.
“Go. Try to save your life. Just like I’m going to try to save mine.”
Grief and guilt clutched me.
And I was sure it would always be the fear and shame and loneliness that would be my constant partner.