40. Piper
FORTY
PIPER
My hands wouldn’t stop shaking as I stood at the high table, my mind forever spinning as I refolded a bunch of fuzzy, soft sweaters.
Wondering how I was still here. In this town. How I’d shown up here at Ivy Threads this morning like it was just another day, though I’d wandered around the shop more like a zombie than anything else.
I’d left Theo’s texts he sent last night unanswered.
Theo
Can I see you?
Theo
We need to talk.
Theo
Need to know you’re okay.
Theo
Please, Piper. Talk to me.
Ignoring his pleading, I’d tried with everything I had to pack our things, but instead, I’d lain there on the floor, rocking and crying for hours as I warred with the collision of grief and apprehension and this feeling like the roots I’d allowed to sprout had grown too deep.
My spirit a toil of uncertainty.
Unsure if I’d been grounded or trapped.
Terrified I was only repeating every horrible mistake I’d made when I’d been so na?ve. Ignoring the signs that had been staked right in front of me like proof.
Visions ran on a constant circuit, unable to get the gruesome scene out of my mind. The viciousness that had taken Theo hostage when he dragged the blade of that knife across that man’s throat.
All while it clashed with the sense that what he and the rest of the guys were doing was right.
A dire, appalling necessity.
Because what was he supposed to do? Let them get to Alicia and Lucy?
Nausea rolled in my stomach at the thought. I had the sudden realization that if that knife was in my hand, I likely would have done the same.
No choice but to protect when someone else sought to destroy.
But how did you survive in a life like that? I’d struggled for years to leave the corrupt behind. To run from its grips. To stay one step ahead of it so we might have a chance at a normal life.
Someway.
Thinking if I somehow fought hard enough for it, we would finally stumble on it.
And I’d crashed directly into a bed of iniquity.
Or maybe this was exactly where we belonged.
So, I’d spent the night drifting in and out of vivid, disturbing dreams.
Nightmares from when I was nineteen. The blood. So much blood. Justin at the frayed ends of my mind as he hunted me.
They’d shift and flash to nightmares of the viciousness that had been written in bold, disturbing lines on Theo’s face when he killed that man.
Then they’d ultimately swing to nightmares of never seeing him again.
At just before dawn, I’d finally pulled my aching body off the floor, had showered and dressed, and had ended up here for my shift.
Numb.
Working on autopilot.
The whole day, I could feel Emery’s eyes on me as she wandered through Ivy Threads. Her care and worry woven in every glance she cast my way.
She’d hugged me tight when I’d first shown up, murmuring, “I’m so glad you’re still here.”
But that was all that had been said.
For the first time since I started to work here, Kane hadn’t shown, and there was an air of apprehension that had filled the store.
The normally light, airy mood dampened.
Or maybe it was just that I’d never been able to take in a full breath the entire day.
Now, my actions were stilted as I folded a pink sweater, fingers trembling as I checked the size so I could place it in its proper spot.
“Have a nice afternoon,” Emery called to a woman as she exited through the door, the bell jingling over her head.
It left us alone for the first time since we opened.
In the silence, the air grew denser. An impenetrable vapor that clogged my lungs.
I could feel Emery’s spirit crawling through the stagnant atmosphere as she slowly wound through the store, touching different items as she passed as if she were inspecting them before she came to stand at a rack behind me facing away.
Her movements were slow as she began to reorganize the pieces that had gotten out of place.
Her words came cautiously when she finally whispered, “I found out after Kane had been shot.”
My heart clutched at her sudden admission, and the tears I’d been fighting all day gathered quickly.
“Of course, I’d known there was something going on with him. I knew he was keeping secrets. I mean, there was no missing that there was something dangerous underlying all his jokes and easiness,” she mused.
Her hushed voice drifted over me like she was inviting me into a dream.
“He told me he had to go out of town to take care of something important, and my gut told me whatever he was doing defined who he was, even though he hadn’t given me access to it.”
She paused while I struggled to find the oxygen that continued to go missing.
“It turned out, he and Theo had gone out of state to get a woman and her son out of jeopardy’s way. It was supposed to be a simple extraction, only the woman’s husband found out about it and chased them. It ended in a gunfight and Kane was hit.”
I could feel her body tremor at the painful memory.
“I didn’t know where he’d gone, and River was suddenly in front of me, telling me that he was injured. Shot. I couldn’t wrap my head around it. What had happened.”
She sniffled as she continued to reorganize the clothing, metal hangers screeching against the rod as she shifted items around.
“We went running to the doctor’s office. The doctor Charleigh works for. He’s in on what they do and treats anyone they bring to Moonlit Ridge. Only that day, he was treating Kane.”
My stomach tightened.
Dr. Reynolds.
The man who’d shown up the night after our accident. I’d known something was strange from the beginning.
Emery breathed out the strain. “I was terrified to find out what they were really involved in, Piper. Terrified that what they do is considered criminal. Terrified by the risks that they take. But how could I ever judge them for it? Assign them blame when they are giving their lives to the greater good?”
A tear streaked down my cheek, and I batted it away.
Slowly, I swiveled around to face her, the sweater I was folding fisted in my hands.
Her face deepened in empathy and understanding, her warm, brown eyes creasing at the sides as she tipped her head in emphasis. “It’s a different life, Piper. One with added fear and danger and complexity. But it’s a good life. One I’m proud to be a part of. And when one of them loves…”
The low toll of a rumbling motorcycle engine suddenly cut through the air, and my attention jerked to the big plate-glass windows to find Theo swinging around in the middle of the road on his bike. He pulled into an open spot at the curb.
He turned his face toward the windows.
I doubted very much that he could see me from where I stood against the far wall, but it felt like he was staring directly at me.
Through me.
Or maybe into me.
Locks of black hair whipped around his obscenely handsome face as he sat at the helm of his motorcycle.
Tattooed hands stretched out to the handlebars and his worn motorcycle boots planted on the pavement below him.
Foreboding.
Menacing.
The most terrifyingly beautiful man I’d ever seen.
“Theo doesn’t love me.” I whispered it like grief.
He couldn’t.
He told me.
His heart belonged to someone else.
Emery pulled her gaze from where she was looking at Theo and returned it to me. “I’ve never seen him this way, Piper. You changed something in him.”
Silence wound around us before she implored, “He’ll hold whatever you’re hiding from. Whatever you’re running from. He adores you.”
Was it that obvious? Did they all know? Could they all see right through me?
I expected Theo to push from his bike and come striding in the way he always did.
But he remained there, the low grumble of the engine vibrating the glass and trembling the floor beneath my feet.
Disquiet rushed through my being. “Is he…checking on me? Making sure I’ve kept quiet?”
A frown marred her brow, and she barely shook her head. “No, of course not, Piper. He trusts you. And even if you went directly to the police, he would never hurt you.”
She glanced at him again before she looked at me. “It looks to me like he’s waiting for you to make a choice on him.”
Emotion swelled.
A swill of hope that bashed against the barrier of fear.
Battering and beating against the stones that surrounded my heart.
Theo pulled back on the throttle and revved the powerful engine.
The reverberation hit me like a call.
“Only girl sitting on the back of my bike is mine .”
And that surge broke through, and I was gasping as realization slammed me.
A flood rushing in to fill every gap and crevice. A soothing against the bitter ache.
“Go,” Emery wheezed, smiling wide as she tossed me my jacket and purse. I didn’t know when she’d grabbed them, but I was laughing an addled sound as I shrugged into it.
My knees weak and everything else light as I fumbled for the front of the store and pushed out the door.
Cold lashed across my face as I stumbled out into the winter chill, though I blundered to a standstill the second my feet hit the wood planks below.
Taken.
Held.
The afternoon sun had just begun to sag to the west.
It sent rays scattering around Theo.
Setting his silhouette ablaze.
The man a blackened sun.
Pure gravity.
His strong jaw clenched as he watched me with those dark, dark eyes that seared me through.
Black flames that crackled and lapped.
The man was pure intimidation. A painting of dark provocation.
His world one of volatility and crime.
Of violence and bloodshed. But it was also one that offered respite to the poor. Safety to the vulnerable.
And I knew as we stared each other down that he’d shown me who he really was.
And all the armor and shields I’d erected crashed to my feet. A tearing away of the barriers and the fear. A breaking of the promise that I would live this life alone because it was the only way we could survive it.
His own pain and grief and barricades were toppled.
All of it sat as rubble between us.
And maybe I’d never been more reckless, but I didn’t care.
I moved, my spirit soaring as I rushed across the distance separating us and swung my leg over his bike.
I wrapped my trembling arms around his waist and plastered myself against him.
Our breaths heaved out at the same time, and energy cracked and whipped at the connection.
A bond encircling us to make us complete.
Then Theo pulled out onto the street.