Chapter 24
12 hours earlier
Nora
I feel like I’ve been on this tour for years now, and all I can think about is Ophelia.
I have never ached to be with someone as much as I do with her.
If I close my eyes, I can just about smell her sweet scent.
I keep opening up my phone to text her, but every time I go to do it I feel like I’m boring her.
How many times can someone hear ‘I miss you’ till it becomes annoying? I just resort to short messages, to hold myself back from professing my love repeatedly.
To distract myself, I usually just go out, get completely black out, and sleep with the first girl that throws themselves at me.
I feel disgusting.
The next morning, when I wake up with that sickening headache, I sit down in the shower for at least an hour, trying to get rid of the night before.
But it’s another day on tour, and I must get through it the same way I have for the past couple of months.
I can tell everyone is worried about me, but I just can’t stop.
Even when I got so drunk, I fell asleep behind some trash cans outside a club.
Luckily, Scarlett got to me before the paparazzi.
She was crying and begging me to get help, trying to lift me up from the ground.
Eventually, she had to get our driver to help me back.
Scarlett got so concerned she spoke to my parents.
I was angry at first, but I understood her point of view.
She thought maybe they weren’t such cruel people that they’d want to help their daughter through this, but nope.
They told her to never phone them back again and hung up.
BEYOND THE BLUES
No concern, nothing. Ah well, fuck em.
I crawl out of bed, looking over to my side to see a blonde girl naked and spread out in my bed. I tap her shoulder and her eyes flutter open.
“Sorry, love, but you’ve got to go.”
Her face screws up in annoyance, and she huffs, getting dressed quickly and heading out the door. I sit in the shower for a while before I hear Scarlett’s voice outside the bathroom.
“Nora darling, are you almost ready?”
“Yeah, give me a second.”
I yell. I get dressed quickly and unlock the bathroom door, to reveal all my bandmates. Scarlett, my best friend and the lead singer, her ginger flaming curls and contagious smile. Alora, our bassist in the band, her electric bohemian braids and unbelievable fashion sense. Then Avery, our drummer, they have an even better mullet than me and almost always wear sunglasses.
“You okay?”
Alora asks, her face furrowed with worry.
“Yup, is there coffee anywhere?”
I ask. Avery holds up a takeaway cup towards me, and I turn to the minibar and pour a heavy-handed shot of vodka in it. I can feel all their eyes on me, judging me. But I ignore it and continue to do it, anyway.
“I’m sorry. I can’t watch this anymore.”
Scarlett storms out of the room, slamming the hotel door behind her. Alora and Avery awkwardly stand up and walk towards me, saying their goodbye and leaving as well. Alone, again. When I feel lonely, I just close my eyes and think of the times me and Ophelia spent together, and that if she were here, things could be different. In fact, if my family didn’t disown me, I feel like I’d be better for it, too. Not having anyone to phone home to and tell them how great the tour is, how surreal it is to basically be famous is just horrible.
By the time it hits the evening, I’ve drunk enough drinks to knock out a horse and my vision is blurry and my legs are wobbly. Playing the set was difficult enough, and I know I made a couple mistakes from the looks my bandmates shot me during the songs. When I walk offstage, one of my ‘flings’, Jessica, who I’ve slept with a couple times, comes strolling over, her heels clicking on the floor.
“Hello you.”
Her American accent is strong.
*
“Enjoy the show?”
I ask. Jessica places her hand on my chest, and her touch feels like she’s left a residue on me.
“Always babe.”
She leans in and places a kiss on my lips. She pulls away and laughs and wipes her finger along my lips. Of course, she’s got her lipstick all over me, like a wolf protecting its territory. But I’m not hers. The only person I’d ever be for was Ophelia. My Ophelia.
“Nora, for fuck’s sakes!”
Scarlett yells at me. For a second, it feels like it’s not even her speaking to me.
“What?”
I am confused.
“Ophelia is here!”
My heart drops and I instantly move Jessica to the side, scanning the room for Ophelia.
“Where?! Where is she, Scarlett?!” I ask
“She left, she saw you and this.”
Scarlett points her finger to Jessica. “Excuse me, my name’s Jes-”
“I don’t care, and I never will, you fame whore.”
Scarlett interrupts her. My hearts racing. Ophelia came all this way to see me, and without even speaking to her or seeing her, I’ve messed it all up.
“She’s staying at our hotel, go, I’ll text you the details.”
Scarlett says, and without another word, I’m running to my driver as if my life depends on it. I need to see her. I need to explain. Losing her again is not an option for me.