Chapter Two
Billy
I study my alpha during the executive meeting Tuesday.
Brick is in a particular rage today, and I suspect it has everything to do with the fact that he hasn’t gotten rid of that uppity human secretary of his.
He’s waited too long to find a mate, and now his wolf is hungry for any female–even a human. It’s dangerous for an alpha wolf not to mate. A wolf that strong will go nuts without a female if he hasn’t mated by mid-life.
He said he would get rid of her, but she’s still here.
It makes me want to howl.
We’re tossing the racquetball around the room high-speed while we talk–something we started back at Yale as a way to keep our wolves from getting restless when we had to study for finals. We hurl the ball at each other without a pattern, testing our reflexes, trying to get someone to miss.
No one ever does. This is good because at the velocity we throw, we could break a window or put a hole in a wall with it.
I want to study the secretary, but every time I look her way, Brick beans the ball in the direction of my face.
I never thought I’d see my Alpha take his eyes off the prize, distracted by a human no less. His interest in her puts our entire pack in danger.
I never trusted her. She came in here doing and saying everything right.
Red fucking flag.
No one can please Brick. He’s a hardass who never stops demanding from his employees and never stops working himself, except to let his wolf off-leash on the weekends to keep from going moon mad. That’s what made Moon Co explode into a net worth of eighty-nine billion in the matter of seven years.
She doesn’t get ruffled, even when he’s particularly dickish. She seems to anticipate exactly what he needs, and she never says anything wrong.
She’s too good. Underneath her placid expression, I can sense her mind whirring at high speed, working on multiple fronts at once. My instincts say she has more than one agenda. She has her sights on Brick. Or she’s a spy sent from Adalwulf.
I intend to find out.
The ball whizzes around, faster than we’ve ever volleyed it before, and I finally figure out what has Brick on edge. The secretary leans forward, both her elbows on the table with her forearms pushing her cleavage up, which might not be a big deal, except she’s wearing one of those dresses with a cutout over her cleavage, making a perfect window to the curve of her breasts.
I actually hear a snarl from Brick, and he hurls the ball at Nickel without looking away from the secretary’s chest.
He’s acting protective. Out of control.
Like a wolf in rut.
I bet the little minx loves it.
Nickel hurls the ball at Vance who sends it to me, but the secretary picks that moment to lean forward, probably to give Brick an even better view.
She probably can’t even see the ball flying at her head fast enough to give her a black eye, and it’s too late–
Except Noah, our spreadsheet guy, heroically throws himself out of his chair to catch the ball just before it smashes into her.
Everyone’s looking at the secretary and Noah, but I’m watching Brick. A mixture of relief and anger alternately flicker over his expression.
He settles on anger. “What in the hell were you doing?” he demands of Vance, his eyes flashing amber. His wolf is close to the surface. I’ve never seen him so out of control.
Vance throws his hands up in the air. “Sorry, Madison. I didn’t know you were coming in.”
Brick turns to Noah and says grimly, “Thank you for saving my assistant from a goddamn concussion.”
Noah nods and says something odd– “Always.” Not no problem or you’re welcome. Not even of course. He says it like a vow, like his job is to protect his alpha’s female, and that’s when I realize something else.
Noah already knew about Brick’s feelings for the secretary. They shared a glance in that exchange that said what happened was meaningful on both sides.
That means any wolf here might know. If it got back to the Adalwulfs, it would be disastrous. I also hate seeing my alpha weakened like this.
We, as his pack brothers, should have insisted more on getting him out to find his fated mate. We should be traveling the world, arranging meetings with every pack princess to find the one female who will trigger the claiming instinct in him.
He’s been too focused on growing this company since we left college. On his need and drive to surpass everything Adalwulf Associates is, everything they took from our pack when they murdered Brick’s father.
Now he’s ensnared by his secretary–a fucking human. It’s absurd and totally beneath him. Worse–he allowed her to stay overnight at his home–on pack land–and used her to satisfy his sexual needs.
I close my laptop. It’s already three o’clock, and we’ve been in here for hours. I doubt we’ll get much more done with the mood Brick’s in. “Should we break for the day?”
Brick’s still fuming. He glares darkly at Madison’s cleavage a moment before he says, “Yes.”
Everyone moves at once, like he’s the teacher who just released the class, the pent-up tension in the room propelling us out of our chairs and into the elevator. Once I’m inside, I text a team of private investigators I have on standby. They’re already on the hunt for every bit of information there is to be had on Madison Evans. We have a few suspicious phone calls to her work phone that might have come from the Adalwulf building, but that’s not enough to bring her down. I tell the team to have someone following her at all times, too.
I’ll prove she’s up to no good. In a choice between his pack or a measly human, Brick will make the right call.
And he’ll get rid of her once and for all.
* * *
Brick
“The Benson deal is close to closing. I want everyone in the legal department in the conference room in five minutes,” I snarl through the intercom Wednesday morning.
“They’re already on their way,” Madison replies calmly. “And your executive team is here.”
I’ve been a holy terror for three days now.
I barely sleep at night. I have to fly back to the Berkshires to run after work and go to the gym in the mornings, but nothing takes the edge off.
Billy and Nickel walk into my office, and Billy surveys me with narrowed eyes.
I rise to my feet, sending my rolling chair backward to hit the bookcase behind my desk. “Don’t enter my office without knocking.” I blast them both with enough alpha command to make them freeze in their tracks.
“Sorry, Alpha,” Billy mutters. “I thought the secre–Madison–told you we were coming in.”
Neither of them say a word about the fact that Madison Evans is still in my employ, despite the fact that I said I’d get rid of her.
I can’t do it.
It’s simply not possible.
I need a steady hit of her scent. Need to see the swish of those hips and the tease of her skin. Getting rid of her is the right move–the only move for my pack–but it doesn’t work for me.
I need her here at the office. That’s what I keep telling myself. It’s about business. She’s the best damn assistant I’ve ever had.
My wolf is confused and thinks she’s my mate. I can control that urge.
It would be easier if we hadn’t decided to keep things professional, though.
“I’ll meet you in the conference room.”
I’ve avoided a private conversation with my executive team all week. Just the sight of them makes me want to throw something. I stride past Billy and Nickel and head to the conference room with them trailing me.
Eagle is already there, directing the in-house legal team.
“Where are we with the updated contract draft?” I demand.
“We have the–” a human starts to explain.
“I wasn’t talking to you.” I don’t even look his way.
“I just gave them the instructions you called in this morning.” Eagle reminds me that while I may have called him at six this morning, it’s barely past eight still.
I frown at all of them. “Questions? Problems?”
Nobody dares to speak. “I want this done by the end of the day. We’ll have lunch brought in. No one leaves this room until I have a completed draft. Understood?”
“What can we do to help?” Nickel asks. He and Billy are standing in the doorway. Billy usually relishes my tirades, but his brows are down today.
He’s about to become the subject of my fury.
“Nothing. Why are you here? Go back to your offices until I call for you.”
“You did call for–”
“Leave it,” Nickel mutters, putting a hand on Billy’s shoulder to turn him around. The two of them exit.
He’s right. I did tell Madison I wanted to see them. I just changed my mind the moment seeing them pissed me off again.
I sweep the room with a challenging gaze, which no one dares to meet. Every employee has their head down over their laptop. Too bad. I was in the mood to fire someone.
I stalk back out, and my cell phone rings. I check the screen. Seeing it’s Ruby, I answer on my way back to my office.
“Brick. I’m just checking in about the Adalwulf Associates board meeting.”
Fuck. Like I didn’t have enough of my mother with Thanksgiving.
“I’m not going,” I say curtly, shutting the door behind me.
Ruby draws a breath. “Really? You’re going to tuck your tail and cower in front of our pack rivals?”
She knows exactly how to goad me. A snarl issues from my throat, loud enough that I worry Madison heard it.
Ruby’s right, of course. As our mother’s heirs, she, Scarlett, and I have seats on the board of Adalwulf and Associates. It was a negotiated part of our parents’ mating agreement. Of course, we’ll never have a real say in anything discussed there, since we don’t hold a majority. So, really, there’s no point at all in attending. But Ruby’s right. Staying away would make me seem weak.
Ruby continues as if I agreed to go. “I was hoping we could go over together. You, me, and Eagle. I can swing by to pick you two up on the way.”
“Fine–but only if we’re finished with the Benson deal. When is it?”
“A week from Friday. It’s already on your calendar–I checked with Madi yesterday.”
I grunt in reply and end the call.
Now I’m really grouchy. There’s no way I’m going to be able to work without taking the edge off.
I stare at the wall between my office and Madison as if I could see through it.
I’ve been calling her into my office for a myriad of inane reasons just to keep her scent here. I can’t be certain if it riles me up or takes the edge off. Either way, it’s like a drug that I need a constant hit from.
“Madison.” I hit the intercom.
She doesn’t answer.
I slam my finger down again. “Madison.”
My wolf spins and snarls, like a beast in a cage. He’s ready to tear the building apart, as if someone kidnapped her. Or–fate forbid–she quit again.
Calm down. I force myself to fill my lungs with air. She’s probably in the restroom. She was at her desk when I went by a moment ago.
Still, I find myself stalking through the top floor to make sure. I don’t catch her scent near the restrooms, nor is she in the kitchen. I have to loosen my tie because I’m too hot under my collar.
I throw open the conference room door, catching the whites of every employees’ eyes before I shut it again.
Not in there.
The elevator dings, and Madison exits in the wool coat I bought her carrying two trays of coffees.
“Where were you?” I demand, even though it’s quite obvious. Like the proactive assistant she is, she already gathered drink orders. “You don’t pick up their coffee orders.”
Madison blinks. “I…do, though.”
“No. Just for the executive team. And I don’t want you doing that anymore, either. From now on, you’ll get them delivered. You don’t step away from that desk unless I give you leave.” I point at the desk as if I’d grounded her, and she left her room without permission.
I know my behavior’s over the top. I’m not sure if I’m subconsciously trying to sabotage our tenuous relationship so she quits again because I can’t take this torture, or if I am really this on edge, and I can’t dial it back anymore.
Fortunately, Madison keeps her cool. “I’m going to bring these coffees into the conference room, and then I’ll come straight to your office.” She holds my gaze with those wide, intelligent eyes.
I hesitate. The stormy part of me doesn’t want to be mollified, but the eye contact settles my wolf. “Fine.” I turn and stalk back to my office.
A moment later, she’s in the doorway, pulling off her coat as she enters. “Yes, sir?”
Yes, sir.Yes. Sir. She thinks I want something.
Damn straight I do. I want something from her right here and now.
I frown at her.
“Are you–” she hesitates. “Are you angry that I saw the inner workings of your family? Is that what’s bothering you?”
I give her massive points for trying to call me out on my shit.
I get up from the desk and stalk toward her, taking her coat and shutting the door behind her.
“No.”
My answer surprises me, but it’s true. I’m actually grateful Madison witnessed my family dynamic with the compassion and understanding she brought.
She straightens the skirt on a black peek-a-boo dress with shoulder cutouts. The need to lick the bare skin there makes it hard to think straight.
“Is it the Benson deal?”
“No. Well, partly.” I give an impatient wave of my hand and toss her coat onto my chair. I want her scent there when she leaves.
I don’t mean to do it. One second she’s standing in front of me, the next moment, I have her pinned against the wall, one of my thighs insinuated between her legs, one hand cradling the side of her neck.
Madison gasps and clings to my arms as I shove my nose into her hair and breathe in that delectable scent.
“I’m not supposed to fuck you.” My voice is crushed granite.
Madison squirms against me, but not to get away. She rocks her pelvis down over my thigh, rubbing her damp sex against my suit pants.
“You’re not…” She sucks in another breath. “Is that what they told you after Thanksgiving? When you were standing out in the snow together?”
I don’t know why I’m still surprised by her sharp intelligence.
My teeth scrape along the skin of her neck. “Yes.”
She rubs over my thigh, and I grip her ass to help.
“Why? Because I work for you?”
“Yes.” My wolf hates the lie, but it’s more of a half-truth.
I find the crack of her ass from the back and slide my fingers forward until I hit the damp of her panties.
She grinds harder over my thigh. Her head hits the wall behind her, and she levels another bold gaze at me. “Well, in that case, I’m totally down with screwing the boss.”
I study her, taking in the lifted angle of her chin, the fire behind her eyes. Madison Evans doesn’t shrink from a fight.
She’s alpha female all the way, despite her species, young age, income and class.
“Let’s not make it weird, though. Just torrid office sex.”
She wants to keep this sex only. Screwing the boss.
Okay. Better for me. Downright perfect, in fact.
My wolf disagrees, but I ignore him. I should be glad she wants nothing more than sex.
Thrilled.
It’s not like I can mate her.
Fine. Madison has a boss fetish? I’ll damn well make every fantasy she has come true. It’s an ideal solution. I get what I need–to keep my wolf mollified and be the one who satisfies her–and she gets…well, she gets the orgasms.
“Lock the door.”
She fumbles with the lock, then turns, breathless, eyes bright. She definitely has a power exchange fetish. I can work with that. I ignore my wolf, who is pissed that she just wants the fantasy, not me.
I tap the surface of the desk with my index finger. When she arrives, I pick her up and plop her cute ass on it.
She sucks in a breath. I catch the scent of her arousal, and my dick lengthens in my trousers.
“So here’s what’s going to happen.” I stand in front of her, my hands lightly gripping her knees. “Unless I hear you say no, I’m going to take what I need, when I need it. Are you down with that?”
Her knees jerk together, but I know it’s not to keep me out because a “Yes, sir” tumbles from her pouty lips. Boss fetish.
“I need it now.” It’s no lie. My wolf will go nuts if I don’t get inside her again within the hour. I push her knees open and lift them, tipping her back on my desk.
“Oh my gawd.” She’s titillated–or maybe shocked by my behavior.
I can’t find it in me to regret any part of it. Not when she’s spread out on my desk, her head nearly hanging off the other end, looking so damn appetizing.
“Next time I put you in this position, I’m going to walk around to the other side and use that smart mouth of yours.”
Her hardened nipples show through the fabric of her bra and dress.
I slide the pad of my thumb across the satin gusset of her panties. They’re already damp, and she makes a needy sound, her inner thighs jerking.
Despite the forcefulness of my initiation, I take my time now, simply stroking over her panties, making sure she warms up.
“You want my mouth here?” I meet her gaze.
She’s holding her breath, watching me. She nods.
I go slowly, lifting her knees up as I lower my head between them. I pull her panties to the side with my teeth, then lick into her.
She gasps, her inner thighs slapping my shoulders. I screw one finger inside her as I flick her clit with my tongue. “Yes, please,” she whispers.
It’s cute as hell.
I shouldn’t be so enamored with this girl, but everything she does, everything she says, everything she is seems to affect me.
The need to satisfy her overrides my need to claim her. I pull her panties off and work a second finger into her tight channel, then use both fingers to stroke her inner wall.
She thrashes her legs, her high heels kicking my back and ribs as I make her squirm. I rise, resting my thumb over her clit and pumping the two fingers in and out while I study her face. “You gonna come on my fingers, little girl?”
She’s breathing hard, that open window on her dress showing her chest heaving. “I don’t…answer…to that.”
I find her G-spot and fuck it, my fingertips nailing it everytime I stroke in.
Her hips grind and buck beneath me.
“I don’t…Stop.”
I go still. Well, I stop finger-fucking her. I can’t prevent my thumb from lightly rubbing over her clit.
“Please.” She sounds so unlike herself, but then she’s on the edge of an orgasm. At least, I thought she was.
I slide my fingers out. “What do you need, Windows?” My voice is as rough as sandpaper.
Her lids droop. “You. I mean, not your fingers.” A blush spreads over her face and across the open window to the skin at her chest.
A smug smile twists my lips. “You want my cock, Madison?”
“Uh huh.”
I unzip my pants and fist my erection. “You say a lot of things with that sassy mouth of yours. Don’t tell me you can’t ask for what you need.”
I reach in my pocket for a condom and frown when I find none. I tossed them when I committed to keeping my hands off my sexy secretary.
She sees my frown and interprets it correctly. “It’s okay,” she calls. “I’m on the pill.”
My cock jumps in my fist. She wants me inside her, bare? My control’s about to shatter, but I force myself to check. “You’re sure.”
She nods slowly, staring at my dick. Her tongue touches her perfect lips, and my cock swells to an impossible size.
“Say it.”
Of course, my little alpha female assistant can never back down from a challenge. She pushes up on her forearms and meets my gaze squarely. “Give me. Your cock.”
I laugh. An actual laugh. I love her getting sexually aggressive with me.
“My pleasure.”
I drag the head of my cock through her juices, teasing her before I part her sweet flesh and feed her my length. She watches the place where our bodies connect, I watch her lovely face.
I’ve never been so fascinated by a female in my life. Her every expression, every nuance captivates me. I thought fucking the assistant would get her out of my system, but it seems to be the opposite. The more times I have her, the more I need her.
She’s becoming an addiction, and I’m afraid I’ll never satisfy the craving.
I’m careful, giving her time to get used to my size. I was too rough last time, and I have to remember she’s human. But as her scent curls around me, as her hot, sweet flesh engulfs my cock, I grip her thighs tighter, push in with more force.
Her soft moan of approval drives me insane. Before I know it, I’m pounding into her, shaking the desk with the force of my thrusts, making her cover her mouth to muffle her cries.
I bring my thumb back to that sensitive nubbin at the apex of her sex and give it a rough rub as I jackhammer into her.
She screams behind her palm, hips jacking up off the desk. Even though I want to go on forever like this with her, I can’t. Not when her hot flesh seizes around my cock.
I growl, eyes rolling up to my brows as my climax comes on like a bullet train. I slap against her ass with my loins driving to the finish. Heat makes me want to shred out of my suit like a werewolf caught in a shift before he can undress. I slam in deep and come, my thighs jerking against the desk, my thumb still rubbing her swollen clit. She comes some more, even harder this time, her internal muscles spasming around my dick, dragging me halfway to heaven.
I take a moment to breathe. Let the tilting floor right itself. My vision returns to normal.
I grab a couple tissues from the box on my desk and use them to clean us both.
Madison sits, a lovely flush making her skin glow.
I purposely play the part of the dick, since that’s what she seems to want. “I need the paperwork from the Adirondack purchase on my desk in five. Tell Noah I need to see him at nine thirty, and let HR know about your salary increase.”
Her eyes flick down in an uncharacteristic gesture before they return to my face. “Actually, I’ve reconsidered my salary request.” Her voice is polite and businesslike as always. “It was excessive and made in a moment of anger.”
I study her, trying to understand her change of heart on this one. I did notice she didn’t seem glad when she won the negotiation. Perhaps she doesn’t feel she truly earned it.
She slides her butt toward the edge of the desk, but I don’t move to let her hop down. “Besides, I don’t want people thinking I got it because I’m screwing the boss.”
I narrow my eyes, not liking the way this is going. “Am I paying you for sex, Madison?”
“No.” She says it so immediately that I believe her. Her flush deepens. “That’s what I mean. I don’t want it to feel that way.”
“You negotiated a salary I’m willing to pay.” I step back, so she can stand while we discuss her livelihood. “There’s no reason to back down from that.”
“No, I’m good.” She hops down and straightens her dress. “I already have that paperwork ready for you.”
Of course she does.
I walk around to sit behind my desk, glorying in the fact that it’s now covered in her scent. That she’s covered in mine.
I didn’t like that hint of defeat around her with the salary thing, though. Madison is the type of person who likes to win. For whatever reason, I enjoy watching her win, even against me. So her backing down doesn’t feel right.
But I understand her concern. Genevieve, my HR Director, would’ve shit a brick at the new salary, which is close to her own.
I pick up the office phone and call Genevieve.
She answers smoothly. “Good morning, Mr. Blackthroat. What can I do for you?”
“Send a fifty thousand dollar bonus to my assistant, Madison, payable today.”
Genevieve chokes and sputters a little. “A-absolutely, sir.”
I ordinarily wouldn’t bother to explain myself, but since Madison is sensitive to people thinking she got a raise because I got into her panties, I say, “She gave up her Thanksgiving holiday and risked her life to make sure an important deal closed, and I want her properly rewarded.”
“That’s…um. Okay. Yes, absolutely. I’m sorry I couldn’t give her your executive team’s personal phone numbers on Wednesday, but I did try to reach them personally.”
Ah.Part of me wants to rip her a new one for blocking Madison from getting things done, but Genevieve was just doing her job. Protecting the personal information of my team is important. “You did the right thing. Madison just went above and beyond.” I hang up, so I don’t have to hear whatever simpering reply she has.
Madison taps on the door and walks in with a sheaf of papers. “Here are the closing documents. Noah will be here, as requested.”
“Thank you, Madison.” Our eyes meet as I take the papers, and she sucks in a breath, as if the contact shocked her. Or maybe it was just my thanks. It’s hard not to be grateful after she just offered her hot little body up to me like that.
Even if she is a hard-to-decode human with a smart mouth and a reluctance to get personal.
Not that I was trying to get personal.
Not at all.
Our just sex arrangement is going to work out perfectly for me. My wolf will stay calm, and I won’t have to figure out what to do about her, beyond being her boss with benefits.
Even so, something about it doesn’t sit right with me. But maybe that’s just my ego. I’m used to women throwing themselves at me, trying to entrap me in a permanent relationship. Maybe my pride can’t take it when the first one I can stand for longer than one night doesn’t show any interest in snaring me.
* * *
Madi
“Goodnight, Jerry,” I call to the janitor as I leave for the day.
He’s wearing earbuds, but he must not listen to his music too loudly because he always seems to hear me. He lifts a hand. “Have a good night, Madi.”
Blackthroat offered me a ride home when he left a half an hour ago, but I refused. Things are already weird enough. I don’t need him driving me home like we’re dating.
Instead, Tony’s waiting for me when I exit the building. He smiles as I reluctantly trudge to him. It’s weird to be escorted to and from work in luxury like this, but Tony’s just trying to do his job.
I have him drop me off a block away from my apartment, so I can pick up an order of gluten free eggplant lasagna from my favorite Italian restaurant.
While I’m waiting for my food, I call Aubrey to check in. “Are you at home?”
“I get off in an hour. What’s up? How was torturing the boss?”
“Um… yeah. I slept with him again. Only there was no sleeping involved.”
“Ooh, scandalous! What was involved?”
“The surface of a very large desk.” Heat licks between my legs remembering it all. “I didn’t mean to. But he was all grumpy, and then he confessed that the dude-bros said he’s not supposed to sleep with me anymore, so I had to meet that challenge.”
“Whaaaat? Oh damn, I think he really likes you.”
“Well, he can’t,” I say firmly, pacing in front of the Italian restaurant. “I’ve already thought this through. There’s only one way this can go, as I told him when he brought the coffee.”
“And what way is that?” I hear Aubrey bracing against whatever she’s expecting to come out of my mouth.
“It has to stay in fantasy-land.”
“Excuse me?”
“The screwing the boss fantasy. Or screwing the secretary for him.”
There’s a businessman who must also be waiting for his to-go order standing nearby. He looks over like I’ve caught his attention. I ignore him.
“Mads, I’m sure this all makes perfect sense in your head, but I’m not following.”
“It can’t go beyond that.”
“Because…?”
“Because I already got too close to him over Thanksgiving. I met his mom and his niece and nephew, and Aubrey, he is an adorable uncle. Seeing him with kids made my ovaries ache.”
“And you don’t want to want him.” Aubrey finally catches on.
“Exactly.” I throw my hand in the air.
The businessman looks over again.
“Also”--I turn my back on the businessman and walk away, hunching over to speak more privately– “Things are super hot right now, and part of what makes it hot is the fact that he’s the boss.”
“Ah, that’s the fantasy you mentioned.” I strain to hear Aubrey over the noise of a rowdy party of four exiting the restaurant.
“Yes! Wait, hang on a minute.” A waitress comes over with my bag, and I thank her and head off down the dark sidewalk towards home. “I just want to keep it in that realm, so it will stay exciting. If he takes me to lunch and I relax around him, then it won’t be nearly so fun and naughty to do it over the desk, you know what I mean?” I mumble the words do it over the desk, so people walking near me won’t be subjected to my sexcapades without consent.
“So basically, you’re into the power dynamic. You know you can keep a power exchange in a relationship as an agreed upon thing.”
“I don’t know…”
“What’s the real hang-up here?”
“I just want to keep it low key. I’m afraid if I’m actually his girlfriend, I might lose interest.”
“Is that it? Or are you afraid you’re going to fall for a billionaire who will knock you up and bail, just like your dad did?”
“Well, I’m on the pill.”
“You know what I mean.”Aubrey’s giving me the straight-talk right now, and I sort of hate her for it.
“Do you think I’m just letting myself be used?” I change tack again. I’m admittedly all over the place with this situation. “Am I disrespecting myself by screwing the boss?”
“Now you’re just being absurd. That is the most sex-negative, slut-shaming, stupid thing you’ve ever said. Do you love the sex?”
My knees go weak remembering Blackthroat’s large hands picking me up by the waist and sitting me on his desk. From now on, I’ll take what I need, when I need it. And I need it now.
Who says that? And how interesting that he chose the word need and not want.
“Yes.”
“But sex is just for his enjoyment, right? And women should withhold it from men to be respectable?” Sarcasm drips from her voice.
I laugh when I hear how absurd it is.
“What, are you catering to the patriarchy now that you work with them?”
“Okay, you’re right. That was the dumbest thing I’ve ever said.”
“Literally.”
“You got lasagna again, right?”
“You know it. Extra garlic bread for you.”
“You’re the best.”
“I know. I’ll see you soon.”
I end the call and hustle up the stairs to our apartment.
Ugh. I still don’t know where I am with all this. Aubrey couldn’t have been encouraging me to have a real relationship with Blackthroat could she?
No, she was just calling me on my shit, so I couldn’t lie to myself about my real hangups. That doesn’t mean those hangups aren’t legit.