Chapter 5
CHAPTER 5
Issa
“ B ut why do I need to go?” I asked, sitting on the end of Ax’s bed as he rummaged through his closet.
“Because you haven’t left the house in weeks. And because I’m dancing tonight. And because I’m your favorite alpha in the world.” His head peeked around the corner of his closet, his brows raised. “Enough reasons or did you want me to keep going?”
After a cheeky grin, he disappeared again, the sound of hangers clacking against each other mixing with his frustrated huffs and complaints that he really needed to find some new shit to dance in.
I had moved in with Ax, Enzo, and Cyrus months ago after I’d finally escaped my abusive asshole alpha.
Not my alpha. I didn’t choose Antonio. Nor had I chosen the beta I’d only seen twice after the bonding ceremony.
Unfortunately, Antonio’s bite mark was still on my shoulder, something I did everything in my power to avoid looking at after every shower and ensured it was covered by clothing. I wasn’t proud of that mark. I wasn’t proud of that bond.
And I sure as hell hadn’t enjoyed the sensation of the bond opening in my chest. He felt heavy. Oppressive. Dark. After that first night, I’d locked down the bond to keep him from feeling my emotions and to avoid feeling an ounce of his evil nature.
At least I did when the asshole wasn’t dosing my food or drinks with sedatives. I’d walked through my life in a haze, like every moment of the last two years was a dream.
That asshole had threatened my sister, had sided with my parents when they’d plotted to take out Cora and her pack simply because she refused to fall in line and obey the rules they’d put in place for all six of their kids. I was one of five betas, Cora being the only omega. She’d definitely had it worse, being trained like a show dog. My parents had made some fucked up deal to sell her off to another powerful pack.
And their plans had blown up in their faces.
Now, the two of us were making our own rules, living our own lives. Or I was trying to, anyway.
“You know I hate being in public,” I called back, leaning back on my elbows as Ax stepped from the closet in a pair of worn jeans that hung low on his trim hips and showcased his round ass.
All three alphas were…well, nothing short of absolute perfection. And saw me as the poor beta who needed protection.
He stepped into the bathroom and my cheeks heated at the sound of the toilet seat lifting a second before liquid trickled into the toilet. The fact he was peeing with the door open while I sat on his bed told me exactly how this beautiful man saw me – as a sister. A friend. A roommate.
When he came back into his bedroom, I quickly averted my eyes as he pulled up his zipper, a wry smirk pulling up one side of his mouth. “Shit. You can look. You know how much I like to be admired.”
Of course he did. That was why he danced on stage with the others at the club he and his packmates owned. He definitely didn’t need to, but he loved it, loved to perform, loved having people fawning over him .
Rolling my eyes, I pushed back to a sitting position and crossed my legs under me. “How about I squeal and clap my hands for you now, then watch movies until you boys get home?”
I would have preferred to be waiting in the pack bed for the three to return, for them to climb in and smother me with their scents…and other things.
Instead, I got the joy of constant sexual frustration every time I heard them moaning from one of their rooms as they fooled around with each other.
Ax leaned back against his dresser and crossed his arms. “Okay, here’s the deal – we’re supposed to meet someone tonight. And we want you to meet them, too.”
My dark brows pulled together. “Why would I want to meet one of your one-night… oh . An omega?”
His head dipped once.
“You guys are meeting with an omega tonight?”
Another nod.
“Then…why would you want me to meet them?”
The look he shot me made me chuckle. He looked at me like I’d just insulted his favorite pair of vintage Nike Airs. “You’re pack. We all decide together.”
My brows shot up to my hairline and I blinked a few times. “What?”
“What?” he said, only his tone was confused.
“You said…but I’m not pack. I have…” I turned my head and pointed at the mark on my shoulder.
A soft growl rumbled from Ax. “That thing means abso-fucking-lutely nothing. If it’ll help, I’ll cover it with my own right now.”
My core fluttered with the thought of his teeth sinking into my shoulder. But he’d said nothing about bonding me as his mate, but rather simply making me a packmate, as in…a member of his family. None of the three alphas had so much as tried to kiss me in the three months since they’d requested I live with them.
“You don’t need to…what about Enzo and Cyrus?”
“What about them?” he asked, opening a drawer and pulling a t- shirt out before tugging it over his head. Shame. I really did enjoy ogling his body as much as any other red-blooded human. He was hot and was fully aware of that fact.
“They’ve never said they saw me as pack.”
He crossed the room and grabbed my hands, pulling until I had to put my feet on the ground and stand. “You live in our house. You carry our scents around every day. You’re pack, little beta. You’re stuck with us. If you want our marks, say the word. But that doesn’t matter to us.”
Something tightened in my stomach, a mixture of affection and fear. I didn’t like the thought of another alpha declaring ownership over me. Not again.
But these three hadn’t done that, hadn’t demanded anything from me. In fact, they told me I could take my time looking for a job or refrain from working all together. They’d also offered me a job at The Vault, but I wasn’t sure I was ready for that just yet. Antonio was missing, but I highly doubted he was gone for good. He’d lost out on a lot of money when my sister’s alphas had killed my parents as well as another rival pack. They currently controlled the majority of everything that was imported or exported from the region.
And one of the alphas in this house just happened to be my sister’s brother-in-law.
“Well?” Ax asked after a few moments of me chewing on my bottom lip. “Will you go? I want you to meet them. We want you there. And you haven’t seen me dance in forever.”
“I see you practice here. Doesn’t that count?”
I’d had the privilege of watching him perfect his choreography on many occasions since I’d moved in, though I hadn’t yet seen him perform ballet or lyrical.
The big, broad, tattooed alpha had been put into several dance classes the moment he could walk. His parents had been convinced he would present as an omega…like the rest of his siblings.
Unlike my own family, his didn’t treat him or any of their children any differently. I’d met the entire brood and wasn’t sure I’d laughed as much as I had the night they demanded he brought me to his family pack’s home for dinner.
Huh. Maybe I was pack. I hadn’t thought much about it that night, but his mom kept referring to me as Ax’s beta, or the pack’s beta.
I supposed if I would be saddled with another alpha – or three – this was practically a dream scenario.
Or it would have been. Because now they were interested in adding an omega, someone who would be guaranteed to get pregnant when they decided to add to their family.
“Please?” he said, batting his ridiculously long and dark lashes at me and sticking out his pillowy bottom lip in the cutest faux pout ever.
“I have nothing to wear,” I said, grasping at straws as he adorably tried to destroy every reason I couldn’t go.
“Bullshit.” He wrapped a hand around mine and tugged me behind him until we stepped into my room and into my closet.
After a few seconds of pushing various pieces aside, he pulled a dress free that still had tags attached.
There was a reason I hadn’t worn it – the damn thing cut so low my boobs would practically hang out and the hem was only a couple inches below my ass.
“No way, Ax. I’ll be naked in that thing.”
My breath caught in my lungs when a dark blond brow raised, and his pupils blew wide. “We can get to the naked part later tonight,” he teased, quickly averting his gaze.
Teasing me about being naked wasn’t uncommon, not with Ax. I was pretty sure he would walk around with his dick in his hand, offering it to anyone interested if it was allowed.
“You’re wearing this. And makeup. I want every single person in that room jealous of my beta.”
My belly instantly went crazy with butterflies and my heart thumped wildly in my chest.
My beta .
Why did that sound so damn good coming from his mouth? And why couldn’t I be more than another housemate, another member of the pack?
Once an omega was added…
With a sigh, I nodded. “Fine.”
I knew the three alphas wouldn’t care if I slept with other people. Why would they when they participated in that activity together on a regular basis? I’d never begrudged presenting as a beta, and the fact they couldn’t smell my arousal every time I’d touched myself to the sounds of them making love made me appreciate my designation all that much more.
They would be meeting with an omega tonight; someone they might end up courting. Maybe I would spend a little time getting cute and look for my own conquest. Even being bonded to Antonio for two years, we didn’t often have sex. And when we did, it was quick and usually painful; the alpha had never given a shit about my pleasure, simply pumped into me until he found his release, then went to his own bedroom. As in, we didn’t share a bed or a room.
That had never bothered me.
But living here with Ax, Cyrus, and Enzo, there had been many nights when I’d woken with nightmares of my abuse at my alpha’s hands and wanted nothing more than to climb into bed with one or all of them and let them hold me.
Pushing all those thoughts and fantasies aside, I took the dress from Ax’s outstretched hands and headed for my bathroom.
After stripping and stepping into the shower, I tilted my head back to wash my hair, then moved on to showering, washing, and exfoliating.
“Curl your hair tonight, too. I love when it waves down your back.”
I squeaked and slapped my arms around my body the best I could when I looked through the glass door to find Ax leaning against the vanity watching me.
“What the hell are you doing?”
“Getting ready. Just like you,” he said. I couldn’t see his face, but I could hear the smile in his voice.
“You have your own bathroom. Get out, perv. ”
His chuckle followed him out as I tried to will my heartbeat to a normal cadence. How long had he stood there watching me? My cheeks felt like they were on fire. Had he watched me shave my armpits and bikini line? Watched me shave my legs?
Rinsing quickly, I ended the spray and reached around the glass door for the towel. I could hear the alphas’ voices rumbling through the house as I dried off and stepped in front of the mirror to start my skincare routine. Being the daughter of ruthless criminals might have had a lot of downfalls, but I’d always had the best of everything from skincare to clothes. Even as a beta I’d been a bit spoiled, and this pack definitely kept me in that spoiled princess category.
Huh. Maybe I had been pack this whole time and hadn’t registered that fact because I still carried Antonio’s mark.
There were ways to break the connection, to permanently remove his mark. But I refused to ask Ax, Enzo, or Cyrus to bankroll such an expensive procedure. I would simply do as I’d done all this time and keep the bond locked down and ignore the mark.
Except the dress Ax had chosen would put both my shoulders on full display.
Full coverage concealer for the win.
After an hour, my hair was waved around my shoulders, my makeup was dark, smokey, and evening ready, my lips were plumped with gloss, and the dress Ax had chosen hugged my curves. It literally felt as though a sneeze would flash my butt at anyone within twenty feet.
Slipping my feet into a pair of heels, I huffed a sigh when Ax yelled, “Hurry up, beta!” through the house.
A tube of gloss, my ID, phone, and some Valium were tucked into a clutch, and I was ready to go.
A long whistle cut through the air as I carefully descended the stairs, my hands clutching the railing tightly to avoid rolling down the last few steps. It had been months since I’d crammed my feet into anything more than a pair of sneakers or house slippers.
“Damn, girl. Where has this hottie been hiding?” Enzo said, moving toward the stairs and taking my hand, holding it up and urging me to spin. “Why the hell would you hide a body like that from the world?”
“You look beautiful, Issa,” Cyrus said. “There will be plenty of our people there tonight, so if you get overwhelmed and want to leave early, just let one of us know. We’ll get you a safe ride home.”
“Oh, hell no. We’re partying tonight. I want to see this girl drunk,” Ax teased.
“You’re meeting your omega–”
“ An omega. Not ours ,” Cyrus said, cutting me off.
“The last thing you need is to babysit your drunk roommate.”
Cyrus’s brows creased as he shook his head.
“I told her she’s pack but she doesn’t believe me,” Ax said, escorting me through the house and toward the garage.
Instead of the three climbing on their Harleys like they often did on warmer days, we climbed into the Land Rover parked beside my little Miata. That vehicle had been Enzo’s idea. I would have been perfectly content with a used sedan since I didn’t often go anywhere alone except to my sister’s.
Enzo turned in the driver’s seat as I pulled my safety belt on. “You think you’re just a roommate?”
I shrugged up my shoulders and tried to keep my face neutral.
“Do you not want to be pack?” Cyrus asked.
Well, shit. This was supposed to be a fun night out and now I was feeling a little emotional and extremely on edge. Honestly? I wasn’t sure what I wanted. It had been a long damn time – as in the entirety of the years I’d been alive – since I’d been asked what I wanted.
“You know what? We don’t have to talk about this now. That was shitty of us to start a big ol’ heart to heart conversation when we won’t be able to talk after we get to the club,” Cyrus said, reaching over to pat my leg from where he sat beside me.
I opened my mouth to thank him but couldn’t form the words. Honestly, I wasn’t sure what to say. Yeah, I wanted to be a member of the pack. But what I didn’t want was to be owned. And I really didn’t want to be just a background member. I wanted…
Well, hell. I wanted them to look at me the way Ax did when we were in my closet, the way Enzo had looked at me as I’d walked down the stairs to find them waiting in their button up black shirts, worn jeans, t-shirts…yeah, they looked good in anything they wore.
But they looked best when they wandered the house in nothing but their boxers.
When Cyrus pulled his hand away from my leg, tingles were left in its wake, and I instantly missed the warmth of his touch.
An omega. An omega would arrive at the club to meet these alphas. An omega they might very well be interested in courting and adding to the pack. What would she look like? Would she be dark-haired and curvy like my sister? Or was she a stunning blonde with big boobs, wide hips, and a round butt?
I swore every omega I’d ever met was the epitome of a Barbie doll, only petite. I wasn’t exactly tall at my whopping five feet and five inches, but Cora barely stood at five feet two inches. Even the rare male omega I’d met in my life had been small.
That was what alphas wanted, the soft, curvy type, the omega who would submit and serve.
Nah. Even as I thought it, I could taste the lie. These alphas didn’t want someone to submit to them. I couldn’t picture them with a woman who wouldn’t sass them, challenge them, force them to put in the work to earn her as their omega.
Because strong alphas, strong men didn’t require their partner to be a doormat. And they sure as hell didn’t drug them to keep them quiet, compliant, and docile.
Nope. Not tonight . I refused to allow all the bad memories to ruin a night out with this pack.
My pack?
Okay, fine. For tonight, I would think of them that way, as my pack. I would let the fact they would be there watching over me keep me from going into a full panic attack the moment I was bombarded with any oppressive alpha hormones.