Chapter 15
Sage
The large green road sign with the white font above the road is familiar, yet uneasiness rises in my throat and threatens to choke me.
My grip on the steering wheel tightens as I inch closer to the vehicle in front of me.
I've been nervous ever since Frankie suggested we go to Niagara Falls for our road trip and visit the Canadian side. I haven’t been to Canada since my parents died.
It would be the first time I’m returning without them.
“Why are you so worried? It’s not like we’ve got drugs in the car.”
I know Frankie doesn’t mean to be self-absorbed right now.
Losing both her parents and having to relive painful memories isn’t something I’d wish on my friend.
I struggle between trying to explain what I’m feeling or just letting it go.
I choose the latter. I don’t really know how to explain it, anyway.
“Hand me your passport. We’re almost at the window.” I pull out my passport from my purse.
“Whoa. Why does yours look different?”
“I have dual citizenship. This is my Canadian passport.”
“Oh. I never knew that. Why haven’t you ever told me?”
I turn to her. “Are you serious, right now?”
She shrugs her shoulders. “You think you know a person.”
“You knew I grew up in Niagara Falls, Canada. What are you talking about?”
Frankie turns to look out the window. “You never mentioned it to me. When we met, I only knew you were new to Cedar Brook Falls. I thought you came from New York.”
“Really?”
She turns back to me. “Really.”
“Oh.” I hadn’t expected that. Charlotte, Jane, and I had always been inseparable. I became friends with Frankie later. How is it possible that I never told her this?
“So, it’s a coincidence that you chose Niagara Falls then?”
“Completely.”
I blow out a breath and drop my shoulders. “I’m sorry, Frankie. I’ve not been myself this entire time. It’s been tough going back without my parents. All the memories I have of this place are with them.”
“Shit. Now, I feel bad. If I’d known, I wouldn’t have suggested it.”
“It’s okay. I think I secretly want to go back but never had the guts to come by myself. So, I’m glad you’re here.”
Frankie reaches over and squeezes my hand. “We can create new memories if you’d like.”
Tears well in my eyes. I’m still so emotional about this, but I nod because I’d really like that. “That would be great.”
The booth arm rises and we’re next to speak with the border security officer.
He’s wearing a navy-blue uniform and appears to be in his mid-thirties. Clean shaven, dark hair, olive skin. His white teeth are clean and straight. Frankie instantly perks up and fixes her boobs.
“Hello there, Officer,” she says. Although the words are innocent enough, her tone makes her intentions quite clear and I roll my eyes.
“Welcome to Canada, and welcome home, Miss,” he says with a straight face, but a smile pulls at the side of his lips. “What are your plans while you’re here?”
“Shopping. Some snacks. Maybe check out the Ferris Wheel. Oh, and of course, the men. But not necessarily in that order.” Frankie winks for good measure and this time he loses his battle and the smile takes over his face.
“We’re not the type to beat around the bush, if you haven’t noticed, Officer.”
He looks up from his computer and winks.
“Well, I hope you’re successful, then.”
She blows a fresh bubble with her gum and raises her eyebrow at the same time. “I always am, darling.”
This time he doesn’t hold back his chuckle when he returns our passports. “I’m sure you are. Have fun, ladies.”
“We will,” says Frankie and I can’t help but laugh, too.
“You are incorrigible,” I say. “You know what I love most about you, Frankie?”
“What’s that?”
“That you make a free spirit like me look like the moderate one.”
She narrows her eyes. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“Oh, I fully intended it as such, babe. I love your love for life. It’s more than being free spirited. It is an intense way of living. Nothing can stop you, Frankie.”
She smiles, but there’s something behind her eyes for a second. But then it’s gone.
“You know what we should do first?” she says.
“What’s that?”
“The Voyage Behind the Falls!”
I think back, but I don’t remember doing this with my parents. It would be a first for me and for Frankie. I turn to her and smile. “That’s a great idea!”
*
“Frankie,” I shout over the rushing water. “This is a terrible idea.”
Frankie is standing at the edge of the boat with both arms wide open while the pounding water from the falls sprays her entire body. Despite wearing a rain poncho, my feet are soaked in my sandals, and I can barely open my eyes from the water pelting my face.
While Frankie looks like Rose from the Titanic movie, I look like a steeped possum.
“Isn’t it incredible?” she says.
I turn my head away from the falls, protecting my face, and open my eyes.
White water rushes on either side of the boat but my gaze travels downstream where I realize I am in the middle of two countries.
The USA to my right and Canada to my left.
There are majestic cliffs on both sides and tourists crowded along the railing.
To my right, my eye catches a ray of light, and I realize it’s a rainbow shining through the mist.
I’ve focused on the negative so much lately that I’ve forgotten who I am.
I am the lovechild of this beautiful world, and I have never seen Mother Nature more powerful than at this moment.
My chest warms as I think of my parents, and I feel a pair of arms holding me tightly.
I often think of my parents whenever I’m surrounded by natural beauty, but especially at the edge of the falls because they would have loved to be here, too.
Closing my eyes, I see my mother and father standing next to me.
They are dressed the same as the last time I saw them.
My mother in her blue dress and my father in his khakis.
The vision of them slowly fades as the boat changes direction, bringing us back to the start of the ride.
“Are you all right?” Frankie asks, wrapping her arms around me. “You went quiet. I liked it better when you were yelling at me.”
I laugh. “Yeah. I’m good.”
Resting my head next to hers, I smile. “Thanks, Frankie. I really needed this. I’ve been stuck for a while, and I didn’t know how to get through it.”
“I know how you feel.”
“You do?”
“It’s not always easy for me, either.”
“What do you mean?” I worry I’ve been a terrible friend. I’ve noticed Frankie can be melancholy, but it goes away so quickly, I think that perhaps I didn’t really see it.
“Never mind,” she says, snapping her head up. “There’s still so much to do.”
“Frankie…” I plea. “You can tell me.”
“It’s nothing, really. Let’s go have some fun.”
I pause, hesitating to let her pull me off the boat now that it’s docked. But if she doesn’t want to talk about it, I really can’t force her. “I’m here whenever you need to chat. You know that, right?”
She smiles. “I know.”
Then she yanks my arm, and I stumble toward the exit. “Let’s go find someplace to eat,” she says. “I’m starving.”
“I know the perfect place.”
Once we walk up the steps to the street level, we are surrounded by hordes of people.
It’s sunny out, and in Niagara Falls, that means there will be crowds of tourists lining up the walkways.
I imagine there are people from all over the world gathering here.
It’s a cool place to be when you realize that so many have come with a similar goal in mind: to experience one of the wonders of the world.
Turning to my right, I quickly remember exactly where we are. “Come. The restaurant is this way.”
We cross the street and walk up the congested sidewalk of Clifton Hills.
There are tourists on both sides of the street eager to check out the haunted houses, wax museums, arcade games, and shops.
They all jockey for your attention and money.
My father hated this street. He said it was the worst part of the experience, but as a kid, I loved it.
I remember the enormous dinosaur outside of the minigolf, and the terrifying ghouls that would jump out and invite you inside the haunted houses.
There was so much to see and do it was sensory overload for a child that usually played alone in the woods someplace.
Secretly, I think my mother liked it, too.
She was inspired by what she saw and how people lived their lives.
She would always be the one to take me to Clifton Hill whenever I begged my parents to go.
At the top of the hill, I’m disoriented as there are new stores and restaurants, but I quickly spot the sign Antica and smile. “There it is,” I say, pointing to it.
“Oh, there’s a crowd lining up outside. Maybe we should go somewhere else.”
“Absolutely not. I promise you, it’s worth the wait.”
By the time we get to the restaurant, we realize the line is for people wanting to eat inside. “Oh, we have no problem eating outside,” says Frankie, and I agree.
The server takes us to a small table just in front of the restaurant with a red and white checkered tablecloth. I grin widely, so happy that they haven’t changed the décor, even though they expanded and the restaurant is now twice the size that I remember.
“Can I get you ladies something to drink?”
“Um, I’ll have an Aperol Spritz, please?” says Frankie.
Looking at the menu, I see the drink I always order. “And I’ll have an Orangiata.”
The server nods and we scour the menu.
“So, what’s good here?”
“Everything.”
Frankie laughs. “I realize that. But what do you recommend?”
“Definitely the gnocchi. They’re homemade and the most scrumptious little dumplings you’ll ever eat.”
Frankie frowns. “That sounds heavy. We usually go for a salad or quinoa, you know something light.”
“We’re at an Italian restaurant. Nothing on the menu is light.”
Frankie chuckles and agrees to order the gnocchi, too.