Chapter 19 – Zeb
Chapter Nineteen
Zeb
Janelle gets all meek until we get into the house and she meets Zayna for the first time.
She doesn’t seem to like Ruger, which I don’t mind, but Zayna puts her at ease.
I don’t want to send her too far out of my sight, because while I’m happy that Zayna relaxes her, I don’t want Janelle getting any crazy ideas about escaping or disappearing with a wild woman like Zayna Blackwood.
You have to be a special case to marry Ruger, and I don’t trust her anymore than I trust my murderous cousin.
I can scent him the same way a dangerous wolf can detect another.
Zayna heads to the kitchen to fix coffee while Janelle and I sit on Ruger’s old-fashioned plaid couch.
He’s always hated modern things, much preferring vintage restored items in every place he’s lived ever since he was a kid.
Janelle sits close to me and I wish I could pull her up onto my lap or better yet, put her in my pocket where my cousin couldn’t see her.
He probably already knows that I have feelings for her, and that feels like too much vulnerability for me to expose to a man who knows how to hunt like this one.
“I heard you got into trouble and had to get Gideon’s help.”
“Yup. Fucking nightmare. We good to go to the rez tomorrow?”
Ruger nods. “Oske bitched at me, told me to remind you to be on time.”
“I didn’t serve this country to have my ability to show up on time questioned by a degenerate like her.”
“I said almost the same thing,” Ruger says. His eyes flicker over to Janelle, and I can’t help but worry.
“How did you meet Zebulon?”
“We met at a bar,” I answer quickly. Ruger’s expression doesn’t change, but I know him enough to know that I pissed him off by answering.
“Janelle? Do you mind answering my question?”
“Like he said, we met at a bar.”
My hand moves over to her thigh possessively. If Ruger notices, he doesn’t react visibly.
“That’s all it took for you to follow him out West?”
“Zeb helped me out with some trouble.”
“You sleeping with him?” Ruger asks.
“Hey!” I snap at him, ready to pull my gun out if necessary.
What type of fucking question is that? My sharp voice attracts attention from Zayna, who steps into the living room holding a full coffee pot with one hand on the handle and her other hand balancing the bottom of the pot against a thick, handwoven oven mitt.
“Is everything good here?”
“Bring those coffee mugs, baby,” Ruger says, the corner of his lip twitching. “Everything is just fine.”
Zayna reappears within a few seconds. I sense she doesn’t want to leave Ruger with us alone.
I don’t need some woman keeping the peace to defend me.
I can handle Ruger just fine. He’s more quick-tempered than he might let on.
He’s effective, so that tends not to matter, but having trigger-happy emotions doesn’t always serve a man’s best interests. I can keep my cool.
But that doesn’t mean I’ll let him make strange comments towards Janelle.
“We are not sleeping together,” Janelle says, glaring at me in some strange way. “You have nothing to worry about.”
Ruger chuckles. “So he’s letting you ride for free then?”
“We’re friends,” Janelle says. “Zeb’s a good friend.”
Zayna hands Janelle a cup of coffee with a smile and gives me mine with a straight face.
I offer up a polite thank you and make sure Janelle enjoys her first sip before I take mine.
I hope she’s not up all night listening to nonsense and trivialities from Zayna.
It’s not like I don’t like Zayna. I just don’t trust anybody around Janelle. And I don’t want her scared.
“I bet he is,” Ruger says. “I’ve never seen him make friends with a black woman before.”
“Ruger,” Zayna chimes in. “What are you getting at?”
Her voice is calm, like a first-grade teacher who really wants to box your ears in, but knows that she can’t for a variety of reasons aside from the illegality.
“He brought this woman all the way from Boston. Could be trafficking her to sell over the border. Remember how I found your ass?”
“Don’t you think there’s a better way to ask that?”
“I’ve never seen him make friends with a black woman before,” Ruger insists. “It’s true. Is that not the word we’re using now? Should I be calling her a person of something or other?”
“No… You can call her black,” Zayna says, her chest tightening with slight impatience. “That’s not the problem.”
“I don’t make friends with a lot of women because I’m not a whore.”
“Zeb, there’s no need to use that word,” Zayna says. “Janelle, be careful. These bikers are ignorant. I’m only here because I… got into serious trouble.”
“You can walk away any time…” Ruger grumbles.
Somehow, everybody in the room knows that isn’t true. Zayna wraps her arms around her husband and kisses his cheek.
“Be good.”
Ruger grunts with frustration and looks at Janelle with suspicion again. “Have you had any inkling that this man might sell you over the border to some Mexican?”
I can tell Zayna wants to launch into another lecture about racial stereotyping, especially considering the current situation with everybody hating on the Mexicans these days and talking about how they’re all criminals.
Ruger covers her mouth with his firm hand which is large enough to cover her entire face.
Janelle doesn’t immediately respond to defend me. Heat rushes over my face. I feel a surge of embarrassment and humiliation that she thinks for a second that I would do anything other than protect her.
“I mean… I don’t know why Zeb wants to help me.”
“So you think he might sell you?”
“I don’t… Maybe?”
The heat is enough to burn me alive. I have been sweet on this woman the entire time we have ridden across the country together.
I put my tongue in her asshole. I held her close to me every night.
I killed for her. Just because I haven’t dragged her off to bed without making my intentions clear to her, just because I haven’t forced her, just because I’ve restrained myself to avoid forcing her to make a choice… she thinks I don’t care.
It’s especially humiliating to have my feelings dragged into question and picked apart in front of my older cousin, Ruger. I feel almost like less of a man and worse because my feelings and words can’t come out. My tongue ties in an impenetrable knot that makes me feel like a weak fucking bastard.
Ruger takes his hand away from Zayna’s mouth and gives her a look that’s both victorious and defiant. Like he knew I couldn’t be trusted.
“Don’t worry, Janelle. Zeb and I will be out today, and we will make sure that he does not shackle you up and sell you off. I can guarantee it.”