Chapter 18
CHAPTER 18
L ily
He puts a hand on my shoulder, holding me in place. He centers the toy under me, the middle head hovering under the entrance of my pussy. “Hold still.” Pinned between him and the wall, I try to relax as he pushes the toy upward. The middle part starts to go inside me.
“Oh,” I moan as I stretch to let the toy inside my pussy. It feels as if it’s halfway inside when I feel pressure against my asshole. “God.”
Apparently, they really are the only two words I can muster tonight.
He pushes harder, the slick toy breaching my tight ass muscles. At first, they don’t want to cooperate, but the vibrator goes further inside me, filling my pussy, and the medium head of the toy pushes past that ring of muscles, popping into my ass.
“Oh, god!”
And the thing isn’t even on yet.
I’m so full, pussy and ass, the toy thick and wide and long. He pushes a button once he feels he’s got it where he wants it. I hear it before I feel it. A light buzzing sound fills the room, then wham .
Vibrations rip through my pussy and ass.
I’m thrown into a whole new world. I leave the penthouse, flying to the moon, sailing on the tips of my toes. “Oh. My. God!”
Now there are three words I can say, but soon, I can’t say anything at all. The only thing I can do is gasp and pant, and the vibrating hum takes over my body—scratch that—my entire world. My pussy and ass clench as one muscle tightly hugging the vibrator.
“And that’s only on low.”
“No more,” I finally gasp.
His breath is hot on my ear. “No snooping.”
“No snooping!” I repeat. He cranks it up a notch, the vibrations strengthening. The balls of my feet dig into the carpet. “I promise.”
He pushes another button, and now my clit gets the full attention of the toy. My sensitive bud swells, aching with need as an orgasm crashes through my body, so hard and fast I’m left a panting mess before I even know it hit.
His hand explores my body, smoothing over my breasts and pinching my nipples. His hold there tightens, and another orgasm hits harder, my body clenching, bending at my waist. I have no idea how I manage to keep my hands on their spot on the wall, but I do.
I shudder. “God. Oh, god.”
His hand smooths over my waist, cupping my ass, fingers digging into the curve under my bottom. I gasp in pain, then lose that breath as he moves the toy around, every inch and crevice being massaged now.
He grips my ass harder. Will there be fingertip-shaped bruises in the morning? “One more time.”
“You,” I cry, begging. “I want the next one from you. I want you inside me.”
“That’s so sexy. You begging for my cock.”
He pulls the toy out of my body. It’s so big and heavy it makes a thud as it hits the floor. For a moment, I’m free.
My knees go weak, and I almost collapse, but he gathers me into his strong arms, turning me around to face him. My back presses against the wall as he lowers his sweatpants. His cock is already fully erect. He grabs me, lifting me up.
“Thank you. I need this. I need you.” I wrap my legs around him, and he thrusts his cock inside my already dripping pussy. The warming liquid reinvigorates as he fucks me, my insides hot and wet and throbbing and clenching and overwhelmed by everything, by him.
“I need you too,” he says. But there’s a husky tone in his deep voice that’s filled with emotion.
The sound, his words, they make a flutter inside my stomach. I lean forward, kissing him. As we kiss, our tongues exploring each other, he moves deeper in me.
His moans break the kiss. “Yes. Yes. Lily.” The way he says my name is my undoing.
“Oh, god, Rockwell.” I come just as hard as he promised me I would. When we were in that kinky room of his. The very first time I entered this world of his.
Already so turned on by torturing my body with his devil’s toy, he comes, too. Gripping the back of my neck with one hand, the other cups my ass, squeezing as his seed spurts into me. “Lily. God. Lily.”
He carries me to the sofa, and we collapse there, skin damp with sweat as we lay in one another’s arms. He pushes a stray lock of hair back from my face. As he stares into my eyes, a deep connection flows between us, an invisible bond.
Slowly, he moves in, capturing my mouth in his. This kiss, this magical kiss, warm in the afterglow of lovemaking—scratch that— fucking , it makes me melt in his arms.
Completely spent from the amazing night, we shower together. He dries my skin for me, patting it with a clean, soft towel. We climb into bed naked, the sheets cool and crisp against our bare skin. I fall asleep in his arms, my head against his chest.
His body is strong and warm and safe.
I enjoy the best night of sleep I’ve ever had in my life.
But I wake alone.
I stretch like the cat that got the cream, a satisfied smile on my face. Then, worry sets in. The room is quiet. I look on the nightstand for the rom-com third-act breakup scene note I’m expecting.
There is no such note.
Thank goodness.
After using the bathroom, I find a white fluffy robe waiting for me, the gold crest of the hotel embroidered on it. Wrapping it tight around my waist, I knot the belt and patter around in the penthouse barefoot.
He’s waiting in the living room at a small dining table, scrolling on his phone. Dressed casually, he’s so handsome and easygoing, comfortable in his body, that my heart lodges in my throat.
He’s perfect. Isn’t he?
And not too good to be true. But I thought the same about my ex. Didn’t I?
My pussy disagrees, saying my ex was nothing like this man, even at his best. Scratch those silly worries , pussy says. Scratch everything! He’s amazing.
He greets me with a kiss. “Take a seat. Breakfast will be here in a moment.”
A staff member wearing a red V-neck sweater arrives, delivering an over-the-top fancy silver tray. It’s loaded with toast, coffee, and all kinds of yummy goodies. I pour us each a steaming cup from the carafe, and he starts to talk, obviously having had some things on his mind.
Mindlessly, he stirs a spoon in his coffee even though he takes it black.
“I was in love,” he says. “I proposed. Things were great, but then, she became disinterested in me. When I think back on that time, I realized I lived a life of complete denial. I knew right away something was wrong when she began acting differently and being secretive. She started going out more. Without me. With people I didn’t know. When I’d walk in a room, she’d walk out.”
“If she was on the phone, she took the call in the other room, right?” I ask.
“How’d you know?”
“I’ve been in one of those relationships myself.” The terrible memories all come rushing back at once.
“For her, it was the back garden.” He picks at the crust of his toast. “Dinners became conversationless, if that’s a word. She looked at her phone screen more than she looked at my face. And then, one day, she left. I came home and found the ring left on my dresser. Not even a note.”
His pain reminds me of my own. Waking to the shock that you’re alone, that they’ve left you. I push away my plate. “That’s terrible! Did you ever hear from her again?”
“Eat,” he says, pushing my plate back toward me. “You need breakfast.”
“No changing the subject.” I pour a swirl of sweet creamer into my mug, watching the coffee change colors.
“Fine. If you insist.”
“I do. If you don’t mind,” I add quickly.
“Claudia went to see Wicked on Broadway two weeks later. My ex was there. Front row tickets. She had a man on her arm and an even bigger diamond on her hand than the one I’d given her.”
“No wonder she wanted to see Wicked ,” I say. “She was probably picking up tips for her next relationship.”
His chuckle makes me feel better. I have a bite of my toast as he continues his story.
“She’d been cheating on me the last six months of our engagement. And I didn’t even have a clue.” He takes a deep sip of coffee. “It was a fresh bout of pain, finding out her dirty little secret.”
“That—God. That is just awful. Who could do that to someone?” I shake my head with disgust. “I can’t even talk to a strange man when I’m dating someone…”
“The worst part?”
“There’s more?” I’m horrified.
“It was my cousin she was with. We’d grown up together, me, him, and Claudia. We were as close as you can be. And I had no idea the whole time. It was the most painful, humiliating thing I’ve ever been through,” he says. “And I will never go through something like that again.”
Hoping to ease his pain, I lighten the moment with, “Hence the eligible bachelor plaque?”
“Exactly.”
Then he surprises me with what he says next. Shocks me, even.
His eyes lock on mine. “Which is why we should keep things professional. After what you’ve been through, after what I’ve just shared with you. We work well together. I don’t want to risk our professional relationship.”
This seems so out of the blue—I’m speechless, my body aching for more sex-capades, my mind replaying last night’s date on slow-mo. Even his devil’s toy seems like an angel this morning.
I hold my coffee cup midair. I can’t even pull up my two-word vocabulary from last night.
He says, “Don’t you agree? Then, no one gets hurt.”
Oh. God.
Didn’t I see this coming? Didn’t I know he was too good to be true? Didn’t I know that this wouldn’t last?
Stop, Lily. Think. Breathe.
He’s pulling out on me, yes, and it hurts, yes, and we had a magical thing going, yes.
But… he’s pulling out on me before the big fall. The one that crushes you. Steals your breath as well as your joy, leaving you sobbing into your pillow for weeks.
I’ve grown up. I’ve learned from my mistakes. I’ve learned what happens when you jump, feet and a savings account first. When you’re in over your head.
You get hurt. Bad. The kind of hurt that leaves you broke, broken, and brokenhearted…
That leaves you meeting a stranger. One who buys you a pregnancy test.
He’s right. Instantly, I put on my shell of protection, agreeing with him. “You’re right. Work. Of course. That all makes perfect sense.”
And it does. To my mind.
But my heart and other warmer, wetter areas completely disagree with me.
And deep, deep down, buried where I try not to find it, a little ache pops up its head, like the tiny green bud of a plant, reaching its way through the soil it loosened.
I’m disappointed. And hurt. I feel rejected.
Maybe… he wants to keep it professional because he never really liked me at all.
But as the days passed, I began to realize he was right. This way no one gets hurt. His breaking up with me was the best thing he could have done.
Because now that it’s over, I’m sure of one thing.
I was falling in love with him.
And if you don’t fall, you don’t risk being broken into pieces.