Chapter 5
Hannah
I closed my laptop and rose from the small kitchen table in my apartment after I’d finished answering my email.
I had put up a basic website for my freelancing, and I checked my email often, hoping I’d start to get more bookings.
Work was slow for me, which was a huge change from what I was used to in Seattle.
My lifestyle had been almost hectic there, and my business had been so crazy that I rarely had any free time with nothing to do in Seattle.
Now, I didn’t know what to do with myself when I didn’t have a freelance gig here.
I got an occasional event here in Montana because of my reputation in Seattle, which usually meant I had to travel somewhere within the state.
I was used to traveling. Our business had taken us everywhere in Washington before we’d hired contractors in various cities so we could expand.
What I wasn’t used to was being idle for any length of time.
Mom didn’t really need me to take care of her anymore, and having so much free time was making me completely insane.
My small apartment was so clean I could eat off the floors if I wanted to, and my cupboards were so organized it was ridiculous. There was only so much I could do in a small, one bedroom apartment.
I really missed my friends and my partners in Seattle.
We’d always made time at least once or twice a week for dinner together or a night out.
I had my mother here in Crystal Fork, which was my priority, but I was still lonely. I missed having things to do and places to go all the time.
Things in Crystal Fork moved at a much slower pace, and there wasn’t much to do for a single woman without friends on a Saturday evening.
I sighed as I opened the fridge and pulled out a bottle of white wine that I’d picked up at the store.
I’d had a discussion with Mom about the way she’d set me up to meet with Tanner in person this morning.
Honestly, she’d been pretty unremorseful about the whole thing.
In the end, it was hard for me to stay mad at her because she’d been trying to help me. And that meeting with Tanner had been inevitable since we lived in the same small town.
It wasn’t like I would have been able to avoid meeting up with him at some point.
I just wished I’d been a little more prepared for that encounter.
I also wished that I’d handled it a little better.
In Seattle, I’d convinced myself that Tanner meant nothing to me anymore.
He should mean nothing to me since it had been over seven years since we’d broken up.
Unfortunately, I guessed that I was still carrying some baggage from that relationship.
Maybe that wasn’t so unusual since Tanner Remington had been such a huge part of my life for so long.
I was still trying to wrap my head around the fact that he’d thought I’d left him for another guy.
Maybe I should have left a note or some kind of explanation, but trying to communicate with Tanner back then had seemed pretty useless.
I poured myself a glass of wine and reached for one of the donuts that my mother had convinced me to take home from Sweet Mornings earlier in the day.
Mom didn’t eat her own donuts anymore. She was on a heart healthy diet now, so she made sure any leftovers at the store went to someone else after the store closed.
I’d already demolished one of those huge donuts earlier, and if I kept eating leftovers from Sweet Mornings, my butt wouldn’t fit into my jeans anymore.
I was one of those women who wasn’t blessed with a fast metabolism.
I’d been overweight when I was younger, until the beginning of my senior year in high school. I’d gotten a used mountain bike with the money I’d saved from an after-school job. I’d ridden almost every day, and I’d fallen in love with that hobby.
Over time, that extra weight had slowly melted off from frequent exercise and less time spent indoors eating.
To stay fit, I had to be active, and I had to watch my carbs.
Today, I was watching my carbs…right before I ate them.
Unfortunately, I could be a stress eater sometimes.
Things will get better. I’ll get more work eventually, and I’ll be busier than I am right now.
I just hoped that happened before I ate an entire store full of donuts.
I startled a little when a text came in on my phone because the apartment was so quiet and the phone was right next to me on the counter.
My eyes widened when I opened the text.
Tanner: Hi, Hannah. It’s Tanner. Meet me at The Mug And Jug around eight?
What in the hell? Tanner didn’t have my current number, so he must have gotten it from my mother.
Um…no. Not just no , but hell no.
Things had been awkward between me and Tanner this morning, and the last thing I wanted was a repeat of that experience.
Me: Sorry. I’m busy.
Okay, I was lying, but what else was I supposed to say?
Tanner: Doing what? This is Crystal Fork, not Seattle.
He was right. There wasn’t much to do on a Saturday night here except go to The Mug And Jug or hang out with friends.
He probably already knew that I definitely didn’t have any friends here in Crystal Fork anymore.
I’d only been to The Mug And Jug once when the bar was open at night since I’d returned to Crystal Fork, and it hadn’t been a pleasant experience since most people didn’t want to talk to me.
I’d had one drink and left.
It had been a humbling experience for a woman who loved people.
That had also been about the time I’d started to hear the rumors about me leaving Tanner for another guy.
Me: I’ve been there once. It was enough for me. People weren’t exactly friendly.
Tanner: I’ll be there. I’ll be friendly. I’ll save us a table. Or do you want me to pick you up?
I let out a frustrated breath. If there was one thing I knew about Tanner Remington, it was that he could be very stubborn when he wanted something.
Me: Why?
It made absolutely no sense that he suddenly wanted to hang out with me on a Saturday night.
Tanner: I think I owe you an apology, and I like to do my groveling in person.
A startled laugh escaped from my lips before I could stop it.
Tanner didn’t have a clue how to grovel, and apologies were rare for him.
He’d obviously thought about what I’d said this morning, and apparently, he’d believed me.
God, it still made me crazy that he’d actually believed that I’d leave him for another man.
Me: No apologies necessary. It was a long time ago.
Tanner: Which means the apology is long overdue. Meet me. Please. I’ll make sure everyone knows that there are no hard feelings between the two of us.
Okay, when he put it that way, the offer was…tempting.
I was really tired of being treated like an outcast because everyone thought I’d hurt one of their billionaire golden boys.
Really, I couldn’t blame the people in this town. Crystal Fork protected their own, and Tanner Remington had done a lot for people in this town. All of the Remingtons did.
It irked me a little that I couldn’t just be accepted back into the town because I was a good person, but I’d grown up here. I knew how things worked here.
If Tanner accepted me, everyone else would do the same when they realized that I hadn’t crushed his heart.
I’d been gone for a long time, so right now, no one considered me one of their own.
My thumbs hovered over the text keyboard.
I shouldn’t.
I really, really shouldn’t.
But against my better judgement, I was going to meet him anyway.
It seemed that loneliness was an intense motivation to fix my situation.
Me: One drink. I can’t stay long. I’ll meet you at eight.
Tanner: Did you eat dinner?
I looked at the half eaten donut I’d set on the counter.
I decided to lie. My dinner plans were none of his business. I’d make a sandwich or something before I left.
Me: Yes.
Tanner: I’ll head out early so I can get a table. See you soon.
I took a deep breath.
I wasn’t sure what had motivated him to help me, but he certainly didn’t need to do it.
The whole thing was confusing. Tanner Remington rarely thought about anything else except his obsession with KTD Remington.
Me: Tanner?
Tanner: Yeah?
Me: Thanks for doing this. It means a lot to me.
I was fairly certain this one drink would help change my situation in Crystal Fork, and since my mother was here and I wanted to be in the area, it would make my life a lot easier.
Yeah, Tanner had been a major asshole, but that had happened years ago.
The man was a billionaire and people adored him and his family in Crystal Fork.
There was really no benefit to him for helping me.
My chest squeezed from a brief moment of nostalgia.
At one time, Tanner had been a good man with a very good heart.
Maybe some of that kindness still existed.
Or maybe I just wanted to believe that it did.
Tanner: Don’t thank me, Hannah. I was an asshole. Maybe it was a long time ago, but I’d like to make things right.
Me: You don’t have to.
Tanner: No, I don’t. I want to. I’m heading out to get a table. See you at eight.
I looked at the time on my phone and set it back on the counter.
It was already after seven, but my apartment was in town, and I could walk to The Mug And Jug.
I polished off my donut and called it dinner before I took my glass of wine into the bedroom.
I was dressed in a pair of old jeans and a ratty shirt that had seen better days.
I’d showered after I’d gotten home from my shift at Sweet Mornings, and I’d dressed like I was going to be a couch potato for the evening. That was, after all, how things had been for me for a while now.
I don’t need to get dressed up for Tanner.
The Mug And Jug was extremely casual, and Tanner Remington had seen me at my worst and my best over the years that we were together.
However, I enjoyed doing my makeup and my hair since it was part of my business to look good.
And at the moment, I needed a little confidence booster.
I didn’t want to look like I was trying too hard or overdressed, so I put on a decent pair of straight jeans and a cute, ruby red sweater. The top was fitted, but the neckline wasn’t exactly sexy.
I added a pair of casual ankle boots, some bangle bracelets, and some earrings that matched my top.
I stood in front of the mirror in the bathroom and did my makeup and hair.
I used makeup shades and colors that made my brown eyes pop, and then added a little curl to my shoulder length, dark brown hair.
I was a makeup and hair expert, so I was done in record time.
I put on a light, floral perfume, which was my favorite.
Heavy scents made my eyes water, so I stuck with something that fit my personal style.
When I was finished, I surveyed myself in the mirror.
Mission accomplished.
I looked nice, but not like I was trying to impress anyone.
I slipped on a birthstone ring that I had bought myself in Seattle.
When I’d left Tanner, I’d left my engagement ring and any other jewelry he’d given me at our apartment.
My finger had felt so bare that I’d bought an inexpensive ring for myself to replace the diamond I’d left behind.
“I’m ready,” I said aloud as I turned away from the mirror to get my purse and a fleece jacket in case I needed it.
I wasn’t sure I was ready to sit across from Tanner at a bar, but I was trying to be optimistic.
Something in my belly fluttered as I thought about looking at him and hearing his sexy voice earlier in the day.
I hated that there was still some lingering attraction there for me.
Then again, why wouldn’t there be?
There were very few women who could meet a guy like Tanner and not be physically attracted to him.
With his stunning blue eyes and his very large, hot body, he was a hard man not to notice.
The chemistry between the two of us was always off the charts, even if our communication did suck at the end of our relationship.
It was probably perfectly normal that he didn’t leave me completely unmoved now.
“You can do this, Hannah,” I said to myself encouragingly. “It’s just a drink. Things ended with Tanner a long time ago.”
So many years had passed.
I’d made a new life for myself in Seattle. A very successful and fulfilling life.
I was a much different woman than I’d been when Tanner and I were together.
I wasn’t as young or as na?ve as I had been back then.
I also wasn’t afraid of standing up for myself anymore.
I’d found myself in Seattle, and I’d never be afraid to speak my mind or put up with giving everything and getting very little back ever again.
I grabbed my phone from the kitchen and noticed that it was nearly eight.
I might be a little late because I was walking to The Mug And Jug.
As I left my apartment, I didn’t feel guilty about being behind schedule.
I’d waited for Tanner Remington to look up and see me for a long time.
He could wait a few minutes for me.