Chapter 11
Eric
I’d screwed up.
I knew it.
I’d known it minutes after adding the note to the gift basket.
“Stupid, stupid, stupid,” I muttered while watching Finn drink a cup of tea. Out of one of his old, chipped cups, not the new one I’d gifted him. He’d also used a teabag, not the loose tea I’d given him.
He was mad at me.
It was the only thing that made sense.
And yeah, I guess it made sense. That last sentence had been a bit much. Granted, I’d been fucking hungry when I’d written it, but that didn’t justify terrifying my mate. He probably thought I was out to get him.
Maybe I needed to apologize?
Weighing my options, I watched Finn take another sip of his tea before pulling a face and placing the mug on his coffee table. He used his sleeve to wipe his mouth and glared at the mug as if the contents were deeply offensive.
Which might be true. Most of those standard teas didn’t exactly taste great. That was why I’d gifted him better tea in the first place.
But I’d gone and put a foot in my mouth without actually saying a word, and now he was mad.
My chest tightened, hollowness threatening to swallow me whole.
The thought of having upset him was… painful. It was actually physically painful.
I rubbed my sternum, my eyes never leaving my mate.
He was sitting on the couch, staring at his phone, his brows dipped low, his teeth worrying his bottom lip with those sharp canines. He was obviously deep in thought. But a few moments later, he straightened his shoulders and started typing.
Bzzz
My phone buzzed in my pocket.
Finn smiled.
The hollow feeling in my chest was replaced by warmth.
Had he texted me?
Finn: I know it’s only been a day since we met, but… do you want to come over? I kinda don’t want to be alone right now.
Had my note scared him so badly?
Fuck.
I needed to grovel more than I’d thought.
Sure. Is everything okay? Did something happen?
I hit send and watched the message arrive on Finn’s phone in real time. His face lit up, posture relaxing. The relief on his face was obvious.
Oh shit. Yeah, I’d screwed up so badly.
Finn: I don’t really want to talk about it. But I’d like company. We can watch a movie if you’d like.
I snorted. Whatever Finn wanted to do, I’d do with him. I didn’t care whether it was watching movies or playing video games. Hell, I’d even try my hand at algebra if it made him happy.
Sure.
I got up from my camping chair, ready to climb down the fire escape, when I realized an important detail.
I wasn’t supposed to have his address.
Text me your address?
A few seconds later, my phone vibrated again, and I opened the text with Finn’s address. Not that I needed it.
Perfect. I’m in the area right now, so I’ll be there in a minute.
Of course, I waited more than a minute to “officially” arrive at Finn’s place. Actually taking a mere sixty seconds to reach him would’ve been quite the coincidence. No, I was way better at pretending not to watch over him.
I quickly ran over to the café and ordered a coffee and a cup of tea. Coffee for me—and for Finn to sniff—and tea for Finn.
Then I slowly headed over to Finn’s, carefully carrying a paper cup in each hand, letting the heat seep into me.
I enjoyed the feeling. It’s not like the cold temperatures outside had me freezing, but I enjoyed feeling warmth, and since my body couldn’t produce warmth itself, I needed outside sources—hot beverages, pocket warmers.
Fortunately, there were tons of options.
And if I were lucky, maybe I’d get to enjoy Finn sharing his body heat with me.
Damn, the thought was incredibly enticing. His body against mine, skin on skin, his blood pumping through his veins, his hard cock rubbing against mine, his blood calling for me. He’d tilt his head, bare his throat for me, a clear invitation to…
Fuck.
The edges of my vision started turning red, a surefire way to realize my vampire side wanted to come out. My gums were aching, fangs threatening to elongate.
I took deep, deliberate breaths and slowed down a little.
I needed to get myself back in check before I got to Finn’s, or I might jump him, and it was way too early for that.
I was only just now accepting that watching him from afar without letting him come into contact with my world wasn’t going to happen.
No matter how much I wanted him—to fuck him, to claim him, to own him—I needed to tread carefully. I’d already spooked him once today; no need to add to his angst.
By the time I reached his apartment building, I’d managed to talk myself down from that need and hunger I’d felt.
I rang for him to open the door and waited for him to buzz me in. It only took him a couple of seconds to do so, and I was on my way to the elevator. For the first time officially, anyway.
Should I tell him I’d gotten him home that night at the club?
No, he’d probably wonder why I needed his address again.
God, keeping up with what I was supposed to know versus what I did know was complicated.
How did real stalkers do this?
Entering the elevator, I hit the button for the fifth floor and waited, looking at myself in the mirrored wall. No red eyes, no fangs visible. I looked utterly human. Weirdly pale, yes, but human.
I grinned at myself.
It’d taken months until I hadn’t flinched whenever I saw my reflection.
It was a reflex. I’d been running around with a rather tanned complexion all my life, and then in the blink of an eye, the pigment in my skin had said “Nah, you don’t need me anymore.
” My brain had taken a while to catch up to my new normal.
By now, my new look had grown on me. I even liked myself again. The contrast between my dark hair and fair skin was quite striking, and my eyes appeared a lot more intense now.
The elevator stuttered to a halt, and I exited.
Finn was already waiting for me, leaning against his doorframe, a casual grin on his face. But his eyes… The tension around them told me he was afraid, and it didn’t take much to realize that what had him so scared was me.
“Hey,” I said, giving him a hopefully easygoing smile before thrusting the cup of tea in his direction. “I came bearing gifts.”
Finn’s breath hitched, pulse speeding up.
“Oh, ahh… thanks.” He gave me another smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. Still, he took the tea and headed into his apartment, waving at me to follow him inside.
I looked around carefully, trying to appear like I was seeing his place for the first time. It was still tiny, his furniture a mix of thrifted items, their styles clashing a bit, but it didn’t matter. I’d come to know it as Finn’s, and that made it special.
The smell alone made my chest ache with want and need. Desire and hunger.
“I like it,” I said, spinning around.
Finn laughed. “I won’t win a medal for best interior design, that’s for sure, but it’s mine.” He took a sip of tea, and I watched with pride as his smile widened and his eyes flashed, the surprised delight a genuine reaction. “That one tastes great. What is the flavor called?”
Fuck.
“Inner Peace.”
Finn flinched as if I’d slapped him. “Inner… Peace?” he asked, his voice rising, face clouding.
“Yeah.”
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
That’d been careless.
“It’s my favorite,” I tried to explain, keeping my voice cheery and relaxed. “I thought you might enjoy it too.”
He took a deep breath, then carefully placed the paper cup on his coffee table. “Sorry, it’s just… a weird coincidence. But yeah, it’s good.” For a moment, he eyed the cup critically, then sighed, took it, and took another sip. “It’s actually really good.”
After a third sip, his shoulders dropped a bit, the tension around his eyes easing.
“You want me to take off my shoes?” I asked, pointedly looking at his socked feet. He never wore shoes around the apartment, so chances were he didn’t want me to wear them either.
“Please. Especially if we’re going to chill on the couch.” He pulled up his legs and tucked them under his butt.
I placed my coffee cup on the kitchenette counter and quickly stripped off my shoes and jacket, then headed over to the couch. It was a little threadbare, but comfortable enough when I sat down.
“Soo… what do you want to watch?” I asked, nodding at the smallish flatscreen mounted to the wall above his desk.
Finn shrugged. “No idea. I’m good with almost anything—except for romantic comedies. At least if you don’t want me to give constant sarcastic commentary.”
I chuckled. “I’m the same with action flicks. Oh, and you can’t watch hospital shows with me. I never finished med school, but those are still painful for me to watch.”
Finn’s eyes widened. “You were in med school?”
I nodded. “Yeah. But I had to drop out.”
“You had to? Why?”
Because I accidentally got in the middle of a shootout between a human drug ring and a vampire clan and got caught in the crossfire.
Then one of the vampires felt bad for me and turned me.
The bloodlust was really bad at first, so I missed a lot of classes.
Oh, and now I can’t really go out during the day, so attending is kinda hard.
I didn’t say any of that, but the words were on the tip of my tongue, threatening to come tumbling out.
“I got injured,” I said vaguely, shrugging my shoulders. “Got permanent damage, so now finishing med school is out of reach.”
Apparently, keeping things vague worked. And clearly the mate bond or whatever didn’t consider my calling vampirism permanent damage a lie. The things you learned.
“Oh gosh, I’m so sorry.” Finn reached out, placing his hand on top of mine. “Wow, your hand is really cold.”
I gave a half shrug and grinned at him. “It’s pretty cold outside, and my fingers were out in the open.”
Wrapped around hot paper cups, I thought, but if Finn noticed the illogical aspect of my statement, he didn’t comment on it.
“Okay, hospital shows are a no-no today. Hey, we should totally watch an action flick and a romantic comedy. I can listen to your sarcastic commentary, and you can listen to mine.”
I nodded. “Sounds good.”