33. Kali
Chapter 33
Kali
I hopped off the bottom step, peering around the room as my heart squeezed slightly. The smell was different than I remembered because of my new enhanced senses, and now the windows were all boarded up. A few tables were flipped, and the cages were all open and empty. The loud, party atmosphere was now nonexistent, but stepping into Impulse still shot a flurry of emotions through me.
This place was where my journey with Zan started all those months ago. I’d walked in here with loathing in my heart for him and his brothers. Now, I stood here a completely different person. The lingering question was whether my change was for good or bad.
“Good to see you out of bed. How is Zan?”
My eyes snapped up, and I saw Gia behind the bar just like the first time I’d met her. Only this time she was loading guns instead of filling drinks.
“He’s still out of it,” I muttered. We’d escaped from PARA three days ago, and Zan had been sleeping most of that time. The only time he did wake up was to feed. I’d been staying in bed with him because he slept better when I was in his arms. He refused to go into detail about what they did to him when I was knocked out for days, but I did know they tortured him so badly that his ribs and other internal injuries were still mending.
“You look fine.” Her gaze traveled over me. “How is your transition going?”
My heart skipped. “I think it’s done.”
“I thought so. You healed quickly. Especially after what they did to you.”
My stomach churned. “What they did backfired. I don’t think Rowan was expecting me to become immune to hawthorn so quickly.”
“Your mother was the same,” she informed me as she loaded another rifle. “That was why she was under guard her entire pregnancy. They couldn’t use hawthorn to control her.”
Sadness for the mother I never knew swallowed me. I couldn’t imagine how horrible it must have been. To be imprisoned, knowing she was going to die while unable to protect her unborn children.
“Are you sure we’re safe here?” I blurted out. Just thinking of PARA or Amaros tracking us down had ice flowing in my veins.
She nodded. “Deadwood was abandoned after Zan and Pax took Keeva out of Project Hope. We’re staying out of sight. No one will know we’re here. Plus, we took over Project Hope. There are enough Shadows prowling this area that we’d be alerted long before anyone reached us.”
I shuffled closer to her, moving around the flipped tables. “Gia…did my mother ever say anything about what I was born to do? What me and Keeva were meant to be?”
She set the gun down, her smile dimming slightly. “Why?”
“The things Keeva said.” I cleared my throat. “There’s a book or text or something that explains what we’re meant for. One of us is dark and the other is light.”
“Did she say you’re the dark?”
Shock flared as I crossed my arms. “Yes.”
“Kali.” She rounded the bar and stood in front of me. “Remember who Keeva is with. They made her believe what they wanted. No one knows who the dark and the light is. No one but you and Keeva.”
“But I don’t know what I am,” I whispered hoarsely. “I’m in love with a Kane. I care for vampires?—”
I snapped my mouth closed, realizing she was the vampire I was talking about. Her eyes warmed, and she squeezed my arm.
“Only you know your soul, Kali,” she said softly. “Only you can make choices in your life. Just like your twin.”
We didn’t even know where Keeva was. Once everything calmed down, we realized there were tunnels under the building I’d been imprisoned in. Keeva and Rowan had gotten out, along with all the blood they’d taken from me.
The door opened, and I glanced over my shoulder to see Viggo and Pax entering Impulse. My heart was still hammering from talking with Gia, but she left me with more questions than answers.
“Everything is going as smoothly as it can, given the circumstances,” Viggo said before lighting up a cigarette. “The Clovers are running Project Hope with Shadows by their side. Word is spreading to other cities. It’s still a bit tense, but better than I thought.”
Pax shrugged. “Showing the humans the black blood of the Shadows was helpful. Many people in that city lost family to PARA. Their trust for the government is gone. Their rage is even worse since so many had loved ones killed by them.”
“Speaking of humans…” Viggo trailed off, staring at me.
“What?” I asked sharply.
“One of them is asking to see you,” Pax answered, his hesitation matching his brother’s.
“Who?”
“That woman who came here before.” Viggo paused. “The one who gave you all those papers. Asami, I think her name is.”
My lips parted. “What does she want?”
Viggo frowned. “She wouldn’t tell us. She’ll only talk to you, but she said it was important.”
“Why didn’t you bring her here?”
“Because we aren’t chancing that,” Pax said firmly. “No one comes here except us. The humans stay in Project Hope. But if you want, we can take you to her.”
Biting my lip, I glanced toward the stairs. I hadn’t been away from Zan since we escaped, and thinking about going without him had anxiety slamming into me.
“Wake him up,” Pax said, as if knowing what I was thinking. “He’d go with you.”
“He’s still exhausted,” I mumbled. “I want him to be at full strength as soon as possible, in case something happens.”
“Then let’s go.” Viggo took a drag of his cigarette. “We’ll be back by nightfall.”
“Go,” Gia urged. “I’ll watch over him. Maybe she has answers I can’t give you.”
“We’ll be quick,” I said, wanting to get back before Zan woke up to feed.
Pax opened the door, and I followed Viggo out of Impulse.
It was an odd feeling to walk through Project Hope instead of sneaking in. The atmosphere here was so incredibly different, even in the short time since PARA had left. It was lighter. Though, I could understand what Viggo said about it being tense. As we walked, some people were shooting us uneasy glances. Most recognized me since PARA had been searching for me for months. Shadows were everywhere, but it was impossible for a human to tell that they were a Shadow.
I’d already witnessed two Shadows embracing family they hadn’t seen in years. Those were a couple of the lucky ones that Zan and his brothers had rescued before PARA killed or took them to whatever location they were keeping Shadows.
“She said she’d be at the library,” Viggo muttered. “I have no idea where that is.”
“This way.” I took the lead, my childhood memories running through my head as I walked down the familiar streets.
Soon, the library came into view and a lump grew in my throat. Asami and her books were one of my best memories. She’d saved me back then and probably didn’t even know it. If it wasn’t for her, I would have grown up bitter and angry. She gave me love that I never had.
I slowly pushed open the door, inhaling the smell of old books. I blew out a breath, relaxation spreading through me as I scanned the small space. It had barely changed since the last time I stepped foot in here.
“Kali.”
Asami appeared from behind one of the stacks of books, rushing forward and wrapping me in a tight hug. My arms went around her, and I buried my face into the crook of her neck, smelling her familiar scent. A tear ran down my cheek when she squeezed me tighter.
“I’ve missed you,” she whispered, emotion thick in her voice. “I have a feeling you’re a big part of the change that is happening.”
“I’m the reason for it,” I muttered.
“It’s a good thing, Kali,” she promised. “The world couldn’t keep going as it was. Life is nothing when no one is happy, and these safe cities were becoming more like a prison.”
She pulled away, grabbing my arms and studying me. Her brown eyes dropped to my feet before slowly trailing up to my face.
“You’re different,” she whispered. “I can feel it.”
Her gaze went behind me, surprise on her face when she noticed I wasn’t alone. Unlike last time, there wasn’t any fear on her face, but she didn’t exactly look pleased that Pax and Viggo were here.
“You read the papers I gave you?” she questioned, looking back at me.
“Yes. Learning about what happened when the war started was interesting.”
“Come with me.” She grabbed my hand and began pulling me toward the back of the library.
“Hey,” Viggo protested. “Where are you going?”
I glanced over my shoulder to see both of them following us. “I’m fine. Let us talk.”
Pax frowned. “Zan will not be happy if we let you out of our sight.”
“Let me?” I bit out. “Try again, Pax. I thought we were past the point of you two trying to tell me what to do.”
He scrubbed a hand down his face. “We’re just trying to keep you safe.”
“We’re not going anywhere,” Asami said nervously. “I just want to show her something.”
“Show me,” I said. “They can wait here.”
Viggo grumbled something under his breath as I strode farther into the library. Asami moved the rug, making me realize she wanted to go into the hidden cellar. She lifted the door and motioned for me to go down first.
I climbed down the short ladder, my feet landing on the cement floor. Even though there were no lights on yet, I could see that nothing had changed in the years since I’d been down here. Asami followed me down and then flicked on the single light.
“You’re a Shadow, aren’t you?” she questioned.
My heart skipped. “Yes,” I choked out. “But I’m different. I don’t know what I am.”
“Tell me.”
So I did. I told her everything that had happened since I left Project Hope. How I met Zan. Everything about Amaros. My transition. Finding out about Keeva. How my blood changed Shadows and vampires back to human. We stood there as everything exploded out of me. By the time I finished, my heart was aching from thinking about everything I’d been through.
Asami didn’t interrupt me once, and when I finally stopped talking, she just stared at me as if she could see inside my soul. Then she smiled.
“I knew years ago that you were special,” she said softly. “I could feel it.”
She turned away from me before sorting through stacks of loose papers. I stayed silent as she kept digging for whatever she was looking for. I tilted my head, hearing Viggo and Pax talk amongst each other upstairs. I was positive they were listening to our every word, but I wasn’t trying to hide anything from them.
“Here it is,” Asami breathed out. “It’s been years since I’ve read it.”
She turned to face me, holding it out to me. Apprehension shot through me for some reason as I stared at the paper in her hands.
“What is it?” I asked quietly.
“This is a written copy of a passage that someone had seen centuries ago. It’s been passed down for generations. The original copy has been with the Kane family for generations until PARA stole it from them decades ago. I’m not sure who has it now. But this paper has been talked about in my circle for as long as I can remember. It was given to me to keep safe.” She held it closer. “Read it, Kali. Please.”
My hand trembled slightly as I took the paper from her. It was stiff, and yellow from age. What if this had the answers I’d been looking for? Knots twisted painfully in my stomach. What if they weren’t the answers I wanted? Blowing out a long breath, I lowered my eyes and began reading.
What is seen is not the truth. Humans walk this land, unknowing that creatures walk beside them with blood black as night running in their veins. Creatures so strong and so powerful that humans would be forced to bow if they deemed it. Those creatures desire peace. If that changes, the world changes.
Nature requires a balance. A balance of light and dark. Of predator and prey. One bloodline is responsible for upholding that balance. When peace is threatened, and the balance is tipped, two souls will be born to that bloodline. Mirrors of each other in every way. One will be gifted the power to take, while the other has the power to give. Their bloodline will always succeed and never extinguish. The two connected souls are not born of every generation, but only when it is required.
To protect themselves, their strength will rival the greatest evils of the world. Their transitions are swift. Their minds are their own. They choose to be the dark or the light. It’s a precarious balance that must be kept. For the one who chooses the dark path may not find the light. That soul will have to be contained. It is the duty of the light to keep the balance if that happens. For not one can live without the other.
The dark and light will always be linked, never to be broken.
My chest heaved as I forced my eyes back up to Asami. My mind was spinning with what I just read, and while it explained what I was, it didn’t help answer all of my questions.
“I have the power to take,” I forced out. “To change vampires and Shadows back to humans.”
“And your twin can create Shadows,” Asami said softly.
“But what am I?” My voice was shrill, panic crawling through me. “What if I’m dark?”
“Your mind is your own,” she repeated the words I just read. “Only you know, Kali.”
But I didn’t know. What if Keeva was right?
A sudden commotion above us had me racing for the ladder. I climbed up, stopping short when Zan appeared over me. The scowl on his face dissipated slightly when he met my eyes, but it was clear he was not happy. Reaching down, he grabbed my arm and pulled me out of the cellar.
“You left. Without me,” he accused, his eyes flashing angrily.
“You were sleeping?—”
“I don’t care what I’m doing, Kali,” he cut me off, a note of fear in his voice. “You don’t fucking leave without me. I go where you go. No matter what.”
His hand went to the back of my neck, and he slammed his lips to mine, kissing me hard. It was then I heard his frantic heartbeat. Proof that waking up and finding me gone had worried him. Guilt hit me, and I wrapped my arms around him.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered against his lips. “I didn’t plan to be gone for long.”
“Don’t do that again,” he said, his words rough and pleading. “I fucking swear, Kali. I need to know where you are.”
“I won’t do it again,” I promised.
“God.” Viggo snickered. “You made my brother soft.”
“No,” Pax said thoughtfully. “They made each other stronger.”
Viggo rolled his eyes. “Sure. Let’s go back. I’m hungry.”
“Visit me again,” Asami ordered as she gave me a quick hug. “Trust yourself, Kali.”
Zan wrapped his arm around my shoulders, pulling me tightly against him as he led me out of the library. My mind was still on the paper I read, mixing with Keeva’s words, causing dread to slither down my limbs.
My twin and I were bound for life, and we were on opposite sides.