Chapter 48
Chapter Forty-Eight
Unable to bear the weight of my thoughts, I get up and creep to the door. I crack it open, and his ears perk up as he lifts his head to look at me. His eyes brim with longing and something that looks suspiciously like guilt.
“How long are you going to do this?” I whisper, exasperated. “You are driving me mad.”
He whines, then rolls onto his back, offering his belly in complete submission.
“Don’t do that,” I say, folding my arms. “You are making me feel bad, and this is your fault. You’re the one who used me as bait to trap a psychotic vampire.”
He rolls over and whines again, quieter this time.
I sigh, feeling my resolve begin to crack. “Would you like to set a time to talk?” I ask tentatively.
He nods at once, his tail giving a small wag.
“All right,” I say. “We can talk. Maybe have breakfast?—”
He shifts in an instant, so seamless and smooth it’s as if magic itself holds its breath. Suddenly, he is standing there—gloriously, infuriatingly naked. All sculpted muscle, golden skin, and blatant confidence.
I roll my eyes. “I didn’t mean now,” I huff, keeping my gaze firmly above his neck.
He is so impossibly handsome. I once thought clean-shaven Merrick was the pinnacle of masculine beauty, but now, seeing him with stubble, I realise I was wrong. The roughness of his facial hair gives him a raw, primal quality that somehow makes him even more breathtaking.
And his eyes.
Bloody hell, his eyes. They are achingly sad, and the sight of them sends a keen ache straight to my chest.
My heart hurts.
I want to launch myself into his arms, to lose myself in his warmth and strength—but I can’t.
I can’t…
Can I?
Sometimes you have to stand your ground, be true to yourself.
Sometimes you have to admit you were wrong.
If he had hurt me deliberately, there would be no question—he could spend ten years following me, and my resolve wouldn’t budge. But he didn’t hurt me on purpose. He trusted the wrong person, yet did he truly have a choice?
What would I have done if our roles were reversed?
I’d want him to forgive me.
He messed up.
He did it out of love. And he will make mistakes again—maybe even big ones, just as I will. Can I be cruel enough to deny us both a chance at happiness?
His eyes search mine, soft and brimming with something that steals my breath. They move over my face, slow and deliberate, as though he is studying something precious, he can’t bear to lose.
He is looking at me as if I’m precious.
When I look at him, I see forever. My happiness is right there, within reach—all I have to do is take a leap.
My vision blurs as tears well in my eyes. I sniff, tilting my head back to stare at the ceiling, desperate to hold them at bay. But my whole body trembles, struggling to stay composed. When I finally exhale, it’s a shaky breath that escapes as a small, wounded sound. I sense him stir.
A tear slides down the side of my nose. I swipe it away with the heel of my hand.
Then suddenly, he is there.
His hand cups my face, warm and steady, his thumb gently clearing the tear’s path. Another tear falls, but he catches that too, his touch unwavering and patient. A low, soft rumble resonates in his chest—something I’ve never heard before. It takes me a moment to realise he’s purring.
Wolf shifters can purr?
He steps closer, wrapping his arms around me. My cheek settles against his bare chest, and I’m enveloped in his warmth and comforting scent. The purr deepens, and the bass hums through me, soothing the tangled mass of hurt and stress, melting the tension in my muscles, and stilling the storm raging in my head.
Merrick feels safe.
For the first time in weeks, I feel safe.
Leaning against him, it’s as though the broken pieces inside me finally begin to slot back into place.
“I love you, Lark,” he murmurs, his voice thick with emotion. “I will always love you. And if you decide you can’t forgive me, I will still love you. I will protect you for the rest of my life, because my world does not make sense without you. My life means nothing if I don’t have you.”
I lift my head, and his eyes—those beautiful, piercing eyes—glisten with unshed tears. Seeing this strong, steadfast man laid bare before me twists something deep inside.
Guilt and shame bubble up, knowing I’ve pushed him to this point.
Yet love follows, overwhelming and undeniable love.
“You lit up my world like the sun breaking through a storm,” he goes on quietly. “You made me realise how lost I was. Because when I’m not near you, I feel it—sharp, unbearable. Missing you hurts, Lark. It’s like a physical pain.”
He pauses, resting his forehead gently against mine. His breath is warm and steady, yet electric with unspoken feeling.
“Losing you because I misjudged things was the worst moment of my life. The vampire used magic to breach the wards, disrupting Lander’s freezing spell—it didn’t trigger until that magic was displaced. When he attacked you, the spell finally activated, but it was too close. Too damn close. I should’ve planned for everything. I should have known.”
His jaw tightens, and he exhales in frustration. “I hate myself for risking you. I hate that I failed you. I don’t ever want you to feel that fear again. Not from me, not from anyone.”
“You didn’t fail me,” I whisper.
He shakes his head, his voice raw. “I did. But I won’t fail you again. As long as I’m breathing, I will protect you. Always.”
His hand brushes my cheek, his thumb tracing a gentle path over my skin. “Please, Lark,” he says, voice cracking. “Forgive me?”
The desperation in his gaze is nearly unbearable.
“Okay,” I whisper, the word slipping out before I can think.
I see my own surprise echoed in his eyes, but he keeps me close.
“You are it for me, Lark. I will never stop fighting for us.”
“I’m sorry,” I manage, choking on the words. “I was terrified—so much was happening, and I didn’t know how to cope. That’s why I was so angry with you. It was all too much. I’m so sorry.”
His fingers slide into my hair, massaging my scalp with disarming gentleness.
“I love you,” I say, my voice quiet but laden with everything I’ve held back.
Merrick’s arms tighten around me, his breath catching as he holds me. Each unspoken vow hums between us in every heartbeat.
I once thought the breakdown of my marriage was the worst thing that could ever happen to me. But now I see it was only the beginning—a painful shove toward a destiny I’d never imagined, a fate waiting for me all along.
It didn’t break me; it transformed me.
Like a butterfly, I emerged from the wreckage stronger, freer, and finally ready to embrace the life I was meant to have.
“The storm’s passed. Would you like to go for a run?” Merrick asks softly.
“A run?”
“As wolves,” he clarifies, a teasing smile curving his lips.
Before I can reply, a muffled voice calls through the front door. “I can drive. I will get the car.”
I groan, pinching the bridge of my nose. “Was he eavesdropping this whole time?” I whisper, mortified.
Merrick does not bother hiding his amusement. “Probably.”
“I’ve got you some clothes, Alpha,” Riker’s voice chimes in. “I will leave them at the door. Don’t want your bare arse on the leather.”
“Bloody nosy bear,” I mutter, drawing a deep chuckle from Merrick.
“But if you two are keeping this ‘fated mate’ thing going,” Riker continues, “you might want to invest in soundproofing. The whole Sector doesn’t need to hear how much you lo?—”
“Riker,” Merrick growls, voice low and warning. “Not tonight.”
Riker laughs, evidently undeterred. “All right, all right. I will meet you by the car.”