Chapter 9
Kuroi
Ever since the age of 14 when my father gave me to a business partner as a signing bonus, I’ve had problems sleeping. It started off as not being able to stay asleep. I was never able to figure out why, but I’ve narrowed it down to two things. Either it was because I was sleeping in a new bed, or because I was woken up every night by an old man pushing his cock into my ass. It remains a mystery.
However, the real problem began when I was, not only unable to stay asleep, but I couldn’t fall asleep in the first place. There would be multiple day in a row when I wouldn’t sleep at all.
I have to admit that it would make me a little crazy. By day three, you did not want to be around me. Ever try to put on makeup while being drunk from exhaustion? It wasn’t a good look.
But even after my father’s business partner died suddenly and I returned home, I still couldn’t sleep. I would go to bars until sunrise, drink all night, and marathon fuck trying to tire myself out. Nothing worked.
Eventually, I just accepted it. I was a bad sleeper whose lovers would always end up dead. Were those two things related? I mean, how could they not be, right?
I certainly don’t remember killing any of them. I might have thought about it. Especially the first one. But, all that trouble of making a plan and sticking to it? That’s a lot of work. And, luckily, my problems have always ended up taking care of themselves.
Unfortunately, my new problem quickly became that even the ones I wanted to live, died. And it wasn’t like I would stab them in my sleep. That would have been easier to accept. No, I would simply be with someone long enough to finally fall asleep in their arms and within weeks, I would be burying them.
And they weren’t all old. One of them was 25. If it were still possible for me to love someone, it would have been him. He was everything that my young heart wanted. And in spite of his better judgement, he loved me. Oh well!
I say this to say that never before have I slept in anyone’s arms as easily as I slept in Dante’s. One explanation could be that Dante keeps drugging me, that bastard. But I’m not waking up with the same ear ringing that I did when I was a kid. So, unless they’ve come up with better drugs since then, I can’t explain it.
In either case, I’ve learned that being able to fall asleep in Dante’s arms came with its own set of problems. For one, I’ve developed this crazy urge to smother him in his sleep. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to kill him. I just want to make it so I never have to hear him tell me that we have to sleep apart.
I can hear you now, ‘Oh Kuroi, that’s so extreme. Oh Kuroi, if you kill him, you’ll have to live the rest of your life knowing that you couldn’t opened your throat wide enough to swallow his huge, sigh, HUGE cock.’ And you wouldn’t be wrong.
But, imagine how it would feel to go 13 years without a good night’s sleep, finally get it, and then have it taken away from you. You would smother someone in their sleep too. You would find thicker and thicker vegetables to loosen your throat, show his flag pole whose boss, and then smother him in his sleep just like the rest of us would.
Until then, though, I had to prevent myself from doing anything crazy.
“Hey,” Dante said, waking up finding me staring into his eyes from inches away.
“Hey,” I crooned feeling more rested than I had in my adult life.
After staring at me for a second, he looked down and lifted my arm. I think he was just trying to lift his own arm, but considering I had handcuffed his wrist to mine, it was a package deal.
“What’s up with this?” he asked still trying to wake up.
“What do you mean?” I replied knowing he could have been asking about a number of things.
“The handcuffs. Did you handcuff us together?”
“Why do you ask?”
“Because we’re handcuffed together,” he explained.
“Oh!”
He looked at me strangely. “So, did you?”
“I’ve done so many things. You can’t expect me to remember all of them,” I replied doing my best not to express how silly his question was.
Looking confused for only a moment more, he quickly relaxed and returned to my eyes.
“You know I’m going to have to leave eventually, right.”
“Of course I know you’re going to leave. And you’ll be taking me with you.”
“Oh is that what this is about. What? You think because you’re married to me, you’re entitled to help run my family’s business?” he asked amused.
I laughed. “I am not a working girl.”
“So, what? You’ll just be cuffed to me for the rest of our lives like some sort of ball and…”
“If you call me your ball and chain, I will have to murder you. Which would be a shame considering what we did last night.”
Dante smiled and twisted my cuffed arm to wrap his arm around me.
“What we did last night, huh?”
“You do remember, don’t you? You made me choose a flog and then you whipped me on the balcony with people watching.”
“There were people watching?” Dante asked surprised.
I looked at him like he was an idiot.
“You were whipping a naked man on the balcony of your high rise in the middle of New York City. There was practically a crowd. The only reason a cop didn’t show up was because they probably thought you caught me trying to escape.”
Dante’s head snapped back. “That’s not funny.”
“We’re in America. Trust me, it’s a little funny,” I reassured him.
For whatever reason, that was what triggered him to try to get up.
“Uncuff me. I need to get ready for work.”
“No!” I refused surprised he would ask.
“I’m serious, uncuff me.”
“How can I? They’re your cuffs. I don’t even have the key.”
Dante looked at me frustrated and then climbed over me for the nightstand. Opening the drawer, he looked through it.
“Where’s the key. I left it in here last night when I set things up.”
“Wait, are you saying I wasn’t supposed to swallow that?”
Dante rolled back and stared at me.
“What are you, twelve?”
“We’re as old as we feel,” I told him cheerfully.
Instead of settling in for a relaxing day in bed, my brutish husband snared, rolled over me, and then tossed me onto his shoulder like a bag of rice.
“What are you doing?” I protested.
“I told you. I’ve gotta get ready for work. Did you think your childish prank was gonna stop me?”
“Put me down. Who do you think you are?”
“Someone whose gonna tan that hide if you keep messing around like this.”
“Now I’m confused. Do you want me to stop messing around or keep messing around?”
“You keep going and you’ll find out.”
In spite of his very clear promise, I did not find out. I did find out how it felt to shower while thrown over someone’s shoulder. And I also found out what it was like watching him shave upside down. But when he really wanted to leave, he did what he had done the night before and broke the cuff off of his wrist.
“Breakaway,” he explained.
“Ahh!” I said heartbroken.
“I don’t want to see you in my office today.”
“Like saying that would ever stop me.”
“I’m serious. I can’t think when you’re around. And I need to figure out what I’m gonna do with Matteo.”
I perked up. “I told you, arrange for us to have dinner and I’ll find out if he was the one who shot you.”
“I don’t know, Kuroi. You both can be…”
“Choose your words wisely, husband,” I threatened.
“Impulsive.”
“You really think I would crawl across the table and slit his throat in a public place for trying to kill you. I mean, I had fun last night but you weren’t that good.”
“I’m hurt.”
“And I’m lying. Last night was great. I would totally slit his throat in a public place for trying to kill you,” I said with a smile.
“That’s my guy. But still, he’s my brother. Whatever he did, I can’t let you hurt him like that.”
“Fine, I won’t slit his throat.”
Dante looked at me amused. “You promise?”
“What if I did it with a butter knife? Do you know how hard that would be? I feel like that shouldn’t count.”
“See, this is why I can’t put you two together.”
“I’m kidding. As my husband, you should know that I’m very funny.”
Dante laughed.
“Yes, you are.”
“So, are you going to set up the dinner?”
“I’ll set it up for tonight.”
“Yay!” I exclaimed actually excited.
“I’ll see you later,” he said about to leave.
“Uh, uh, uh,” I told him stopping him in his tracks.
“What?”
I puckered my lips and pointed at them. I wasn’t sure how he would respond to this. Last night he seemed completely into kissing. But a lot of closet-cases like him wanted one thing when the sun was down and another when the sun was up.
To my surprise, Dante released a frustrated exhale, crossed the room and kissed me on the lips. He had tried to make it just a peck, but with him so close, I rested my forearms on his shoulders and got comfortable.
God was he a good kisser. When his tongue touched mine, I felt drunk. My brain melted like warm caramel. And after I had completely lost track of time, he pulled away.
“No, we can’t do this now. I really gotta get to work.”
“Are you sure?” I asked. “My ass is right here,” I told him tilting my naked hole towards him.
Staring at it for a second, it didn’t take long for him to break my spell and head out.
“You’re not good for me,” he said with smile as the elevator doors closed.
“But you’re great for me,” I said to myself wondering how I would breathe without him.
With him gone, I fell on the couch staring at the elevator hoping to see it open again. It didn’t. Even after I knew it wouldn’t, I couldn’t get myself to leave thinking that it might. If it wasn’t for having to go to the bathroom, I could have stayed there forever.
Once relieved and in the bathroom, I got ready for the day. What would I do with myself considering Dante didn’t want me to come to his work? There was a lot of time before our dinner with Matteo. How I filled it would determine what I was going to wear.
Deciding to visit my sister, I put on a midnight blue satin suit with long-cut bell bottom flairs. I had the perfect heels for them. And since I would be going home, the makeup would be minimal.
Dressed and ready to go, I soon realized that I didn’t have a way of getting there. Retrieving my phone, I gave my husband a call.
“How’d you get this number?” he asked when he answered.
“How did you know it was me?”
“Fair enough. What’s up?”
“How do I call for a helicopter?”
“What?”
“When I was home, I called my father’s assistant and the pilot would meet me on the heliport. How do you do it? Do I call your assistant?”
Dante laughed. “If you asked my assistant to arrange for the family helicopter, she wouldn’t know what the hell you were talking about.”
“Do I call your pilot directly?” I asked confused.
“What makes you think that I have a helicopter on standby?”
“Why wouldn’t you?”
“Why would I?”
Seeing that this conversation was going nowhere, I got to the point.
“I want to go visit Yuki who is at home today. How do I do it?”
“You could drive.”
“Nope. Try again.”
“What do you mean, nope?”
“Do I have to explain what no means? Try again!”
“I could have a driver pick you up.”
“Nope. Again.”
“How about I arrange for a helicopter to take you to Sato’s?”
I smiled delighted. “There you go, husband. I knew you’d get it.”
Dante didn’t seem happy about it, but he informed me that his assistant would be calling me with the details. Within 20 minutes she had, and at the heliport 20 minutes after that, I landed at my father’s compound within the hour.
Like every good Japanese, Yuki was a creature of habit. This was the time for her to be in her garden. Finding her there, I regretted wearing heels.
“I can’t understand how you could enjoy being out here,” I said furious that not even this tinted her porcelain complexion.
“It relaxes me. Perhaps you should consider gardening,” she said continuing to prune her winter rose bushes.
“I have my own ways of relaxing,” I told my icy sister.
“I imagine.”
“I’m sure you don’t.”
Silence fell between us leaving me staring at her with nothing better to do.
“I bought you a gift.”
“Did you?” I asked intrigued. “Will this one be my wedding present?”
“You can think of it however you’d like. Has married life been treating you well?”
Had married life been treating me well? Let’s see. I was sleeping better than I have in years. I had had the greatest fuck of my life. And I was beginning to enjoy my husband’s company.
“I can think of worse things.”
Hearing my declaration, Yuki almost collapsed in surprise… or at least, her version of it, which consisted of a slight glance back with eye contact. Returning her attention to her roses, she said, “I’m pleased.”
Pruning for barely a minute more, she gathered her stuff and lead me back inside. As she did, she almost expressed an emotion. I had never seen my sister so rattled. Who was this person beside me?
“Tea?” she asked, her tone screaming her distress.
“Please,” I replied willing to agree to anything to calm her down.
Having chosen the balcony where I had married Dante for our tea, I understood the cause of my sister’s riotous turmoil. It was losing me.
Her delicate heart struggled to handle it. Her expressionless gaze into the woods in front of us was all she could do to not throw herself over the balcony to her death. My heart broke for her. It was tragic.
“You said you had a gift for me?” I asked hoping to rescue her from her despair.
Turning back to me, she stared and then got up.
“I will retrieve it.”
While she was gone, I allowed my mind to shift to the time I had spent at this compound. I had tried to be here as little as I could. I had always considered it a prison. Living with my lovers had been my escape.
Yuki had never had such options. I wasn’t sure if she had even ever had a boyfriend.
It was possible that she had. Over the years I had been gone a lot. Whenever the chance at a new life presented itself, I took it. And as I engaged in another doomed affair, my sister remained here being my father’s perfect daughter.
If Yuki ever considered this place her prison, it certainly came with privileges. Unlike me, she had full access to my father’s money. And a few times a year she would travel back to Japan to spend time with the brothers I had barely met.
But, even with that freedom, there would always come a time when her leash drew her back. Yuki was the one constant of this compound. She walked the grounds like a ghost. If she had ever had a lover, it would have had to have been as she traveled. But it was hard to imagine that.
Returning to our tea, Yuki held an elegantly wrapped box. Standing to accept her gift, I held the other end of it and bowed.
“For your happiness,” she wished.
“You honor me,” I replied unable to ignore my programming. “Please, sit,” I said waiting for her to return to her seat.
Again seated with the gift between us, I looked at it with anticipation. Removing the tape while making sure to admire the wrapping, I eventually found a white box. Lifting the top, inside I found what I often had, an elegantly tailored black dress.
I was delighted. If nothing else, Yuki had exquisite taste. Where she found her gifts, I would never know. The lack of a label on them once led me to believe that she had designed them herself. But as they became more elaborate, her having designed them became less likely.
“This is incredible,” I said holding it out in front of me.
The top of the dress was sleeveless and form fitting with black threaded embroidery. It was classically Chinese. The bottom continued with the thick black silk which split into pant legs that fell together to resemble a dress.
“I’m glad you like it,” Yuki said with the slightest hint of a smile.
“I more than like it. I will be wearing it tonight.”
“Will you be going out?”
“I will be having dinner with Dante and his brother,” I said proudly.
“Oh.”
“Have you met Dante’s brother, Matteo?”
Yuki lowered her head and gave a slight twist indicating she hadn’t.
“Someone made an attempt on Dante’s life.”
“Oh?”
“It was why he had crashed the car on our wedding day. He hadn’t just run into a tree trying to get away from me,” I said trying to hide the relief I felt saying it.
“Huh,” she chirped ignoring my emotional indulgence. “And your dinner with Matteo?”
“He believes there was someone waiting for him outside our compound who took a shot at him.
“Does father know about this?”
“He knows none of this. And you must be sworn to secrecy. Until we figure out who tried to kill him, this can’t get out.”
“Your secrets have always been safe with me.”
“I know,” I said glancing down at the dress.
Yuki might have known my secrets before I had. She had bought me my first dress before I had tried one on. Staring at her first gift, I hadn’t known what to think. I had felt both exposed and humiliated. But the joy she expressed when I had tried it on was what had made it comfortable.
Now, my dresses were as much a part of me as any of my clothing. It was my way of expressing who I was. It had been my rebellion while under my father’s strong thumb, and a way of throwing off my enemies. How were they supposed to respond to someone who looked like me knowing the wrong word could be their last?
“Why is it that your husband suspects his brother?”
“They think he was ordered to by their father?”
“And you are joining them for dinner tonight?”
“I told Dante that I would be able to see his guilt.”
“Have you gained a power I am unaware of?” she asked teasing me.
“I have gained many,” I replied jokingly. “I can now see through walls.”
“That is great skill.”
“I can also move the saucer from under the cup without touching it,” I told her holding my hands above it as if about levitate it. “I just don’t want to right now,” I said relaxing in mock refusal.
Yuki put her hand over her mouth hiding her laughter. It always made me feel good to make my sister laugh. It had never been easy. But when I did, I felt complete.
Enjoying the rest of the day with my sister, I left her promising that I would visit again. And I did plan to in spite of all of her emotional outbursts.
Calling Dante’s assistant, the helicopter was there with enough time to return home, shower again and get dressed for dinner. I knew what I would wear, but I hadn’t decided on the makeup. What impression did I want to make on my new brother?
He certainly needed to know that I would kill him if he went after Dante. What would communicate that? Cat eyes were so out of fashion that someone would have to crazy to wear it. Was I that type of crazy? Or would that be going too far?
Deciding on a pale foundation that would give me a ghostly look, I emphasized my already thick eyebrows and chose black lipstick. It was very 1980s Grace Jones. It said, don’t turn your back on me because I’m crazy enough to have sex with O.J. Simpson.
“What the fuck?” Dante said when he came to change and get me. “You know that we’re having dinner with my brother, right? He’s not gonna go for any of this shit you’re wearing.”
As Dante waved indicating everything about me, I ignored him.
“Well, the purpose of tonight isn’t to have him go for me. It is to find out if he tried to kill you.”
“Yeah, but if he didn’t, you’re gonna have to see him on a regular basis. Matteo isn’t as open minded as I am.”
“Then he’s going to have to learn to be, isn’t he.”
Dante looked flustered. I didn’t think it possible for someone with so many tattoos. Taking my hand, he said, “I want you to know that you look fuckin’ great right now. I’m serious. I love everything about it. But when it comes to my family…”
“When it comes to your family, they’ll have to get used to it.”
“Kuroi…”
“Are you asking me to stab you again?”
Dante let go my hand and jumped back.
“No!” When he saw I wasn’t going to, he added, “I’m still healing from the last time.”
Remembering what I had done to him. I did feel a little bad.
“Ahhh, my poor baby,” I said approaching him slowly.
Directly in front of him, I slipped my hand on his side and with my thumb, lightly brushed the spot where I stabbed him. I could feel the stitched skin. Dante’s body was tense beneath me, but he didn’t pull away.
“I will never let anyone do this to you again,” I told him looking up into his eyes.
“You’re the one who did it. Are you gonna do it again?”
“I hope not,” I told him honestly. “I only want to protect you.”
Dante seemed less assured by my answer than I wanted him to be. That was probably because I didn’t want to lie to him. I still didn’t know what I did when I slept. He should be ready to defend himself if in exhausted delusion I tried something.
I truly didn’t want to hurt him again. But I wasn’t sure I could stop myself. I could never be trusted.
“You should get ready,” I told him not wanting to let him go.
He stared down at me before moving.
“If you are good tonight, maybe I’ll have something waiting for you when we get home.”
“Don’t make a promise you can’t keep,” I replied flirtatiously.
“You can take me at my word. Always,” he told me squeezing my ass.
Feeling his large hand consume me, my cock got hard. What did he have in mind? I had liked everything about what we had done the night before. The only downside was that I couldn’t also feel the crop.
“I’ll be good,” I said pressing where I stabbed him with my thumb.
He flinched tightening his grip on my ass. His fingers dug into me almost tearing into my flesh. It hurt and I liked it.
With his free hand shooting to my wrist to remove it from his side, I gave another small squeeze and let go. Once my hand was off of him, he leaned down and gave me a kiss. It wasn’t long enough, but it reminded me of the benefits of being good.
Perhaps I wasn’t going to jump across the table and slit Matteo’s throat after all. I had too much to lose if I did. Did my husband already know how to control me? I didn’t know how I felt about that.
When Dante left me to get ready. I remained in the living room waiting for him. When he returned, it was with a surprise. He looked different. Everything he wore was basically the same but his button up dress shirt was striped with red, white, and blue. Was this my husband relaxing? It might have been.
Heading to the elevator, I took his arm. When I had it, he didn’t resist. He stood up straighter. It was like he enjoyed having me by his side. I couldn’t believe that because no one did. Even the boy I had love shied away from allowing us to been seen in public together.
He wasn’t a part of the world that Dante and I shared, so he feared for his life. Turns out, he had a right to be. He simple feared the wrong people. He should have feared the only person he trusted. Talk about a bad judge of character.
Arriving at the restaurant, I waited for Dante to open my car door. It took him a second to realize what I was doing, but he figured it out.
“Don’t expect me to do this every time,” he informed me as I got out.
I ignored him, waited for him to close the car door, and then took his arm. Again, he straightened his back and walked taller.
Entering the restaurant, I scanned the room. Making note of the exits, I next examined the patrons. There were a mix of clientele none of which were Asian or black.
There was one person looking at us, though. He was hard to miss. He looked like a prettier version of Dante. And if I were single and looking to get fucked tonight, he would be who I left with.
“Your brother is gay?” I asked Dante whose attention snapped to me in surprise.
“Not in a million years,” he said confidently.
I looked back at the man who watched us approach. I could see the wheels in his head spinning. He was confused about how to respond. Seeing us had unbalanced him. That was good. Now I had to continue it.
“Do you know who I am?” I said to Matteo before Dante got a chance to speak.
“I’ve heard a lot about you,” Matteo said with a smile.
“All of it good, I’m sure,” I told him.
“Depends. Is what they say true?”
“And what do they say?” I said as my jaw clenched.
“How about you two wait until we sit down before making a scene,” Dante said looking uneasy.
“Who’s making a scene?” I asked as Dante pulled out my chair for me.
“You two. And that’s not how this fuckin’ night is gonna go.”
I looked at Dante amused.
“And how is tonight going to go?”
Dante sat.
“It’s gonna start with me introducing you two.”
“Then go ahead. Introduce us,” I said cutting him off.
Dante adjusted in his chair uncomfortably.
“Kuroi, this is my brother, Matteo. Matteo, this is… ah”
“His husband,” I said cutting him off again. “I’m his husband,” I said reaching across the table and shaking Matteo’s hand. “It seems like we have something in common,” I told him with a smile.
“Yeah? What’s that?” Matteo asked.
“Kuroi!” Dante said reading my mind.
I turned to Dante and relented with a shrug.
“What do we have in common?” he asked, his eyes bouncing between Dante and me.
“Me. I’m what you have in common,” Dante replied.
“Yeah. Guess so,” Matteo agreed relaxing.
As I stared at him watching his every move, he stared back at me. He was definitely gay.
“So, you’re the famous Black Widow,” he said with a smile.
Every muscle in my body tense hearing him say it. I had killed people for less.
“Does everyone you sleep with die?” Matteo asked amused. “Should I worry about my brother?”
“What the fuck are you askin’?” Dante interjected.
“I’m asking if the two of you are fuckin’,” he said bluntly.
I replied, “I’m his husband. What do you think?”
Matteo fell back in his seat and laughed.
“What are you laughing at? Jealous?” I challenged.
“Maybe. What makes an ass so good it could turn my brother?”
“Watch your fuckin’ mouth, Matteo.”
“I’m just saying, there’s got to be something really good under there if it could turn you gay. Maybe you should spread the love,” Matteo said gesturing to me.
That was when Dante jumped up, reached across the table, grabbed a knife and pressed it to his brother throat.
“I said watch your fuckin’ mouth. You understand me?”
Not getting what was going on, Matteo laughed.
“Alright. I got it. I’ll watch what I say.”
When Dante didn’t move, I added, “I think he gets it.”
“I get it, Dante. I get it,” he said holding up his hands.
It took a second, but Dante relaxed. I looked around at the people who had stopped to stare at us.
“He thought he was choking,” I told everyone watching us. “False alarm. You are dismissed.”
Eventually everyone returned to their meal and everyone at our table relaxed.
“So, I hear that you are the one responsible for Dante and my marriage,” I asked refocusing on why we had come.
“And it looks like you two should be thanking me,” he said proudly.
“You think anything that happens between Kuroi and me lets you off the hook for the crazy shit you pulled.”
“You know why I did it, Dante,” Matteo said defensively.
“Why did you do it?” I asked curiously.
Matteo turned to me.
“Because that fucker messed up my friend’s little sister,” Matteo said immediately angered.
“Messed up how?”
“Messed up in the way that gets you killed,” Matteo explained. “You should know something about that.”
“So, you’re saying he deserved it?”
“He was practically asking for it.”
“Is that why you took a shot at Dante? Was he asking for it too?”
“What are you talking about? Who took a shot at you?” Matteo asked his brother.
“Don’t play dumb. We know you took a shot at him,” I continued.
“What the fuck is he talking about, Dante?”
A reluctant Dante leaned forward with his elbows on the table and said, “I think what Kuroi is trying to ask you is, where were you when I went to Sato’s? Did you follow me up there?”
“Follow you up there? Why would I follow you up there?”
“To take a shot at me when I was leaving.”
“To take a shot at you? Why would I try to shoot you?” he asked confused.
“Maybe you were ordered to,” Dante suggested.
Matteo stared at Dante not answering.
“Pa didn’t ask me to take you out,” he replied soberly.
Sensing that there was more to his story like I did, Dante asked, “What did he ask you to do?”
Matteo looked down unable to maintain eye contact with either of us.
“Ya know, you shouldn’t have cut Pa out like you do. He doesn’t like it.”
“What did he ask you to do, Matteo?”
“He didn’t ask me to do anything,” he said still not looking up.
“Fuckin’ talk to me, Matteo,” Dante demanded. “What aren’t you telling me?”
“It just that, Pa’s been asking if I would treat the business like you do.”
“What does that mean?”
“You know Pa. He doesn’t like change. He’s been doing things the same way since he was born. You came in, made all of these changes, and blocked him out. He wants back in.”
“He wants to know who you would back if he pushed me out.”
“More like, if you were out of the picture. He asked me how I would run things.”
“You think he’s gonna make a move against me,” Dante clarified.
Matteo looked at his brother. “I think he already has.”
“How’s that?” Dante asked laser-focused.
“Uncle Vinny’s back.”
Dante slowly fell into his chair hearing the news. I looked between the two of them trying to figure out what was going on.
“Who’s Uncle Vinny?”
Matteo replied, “He’s our father’s brother. Legend has it that he once made a move against our father for the business and my father exiled him for it. He’s been asking to return to the states for thirty years and our father wouldn’t let him.”
“And you think that your father letting him come back has to do with him making a move against Dante?” I clarified.
Matteo looked at Dante for confirmation. “Why would he change his mind now after thirty years?”
“Why are you telling me this? You could’ve held this back,” Dante asked Matteo.
“I’m telling you because you’re my brother. You’ve always had my back. I want you to know that I have yours. We’re family. There’s nothing that will come between us no matter how tight their ass is.”
Dante turned his attention to me for my response. For once, I didn’t know what to say.
Matteo was telling Dante that I shouldn’t matter.Did Dante believe that? Did I matter to him or was I just a diversion? Maybe all of my makeup had tricked him into believing that he was with a woman and it was just a matter of time before he realized what I was.
With a scared waiter approaching the table soon afterwards, Dante didn’t address what Matteo had suggested. Instead, we ordered Italian pasta and wine, and pretended Matteo hadn’t said anything he had.
Droning on about a tattoo artist he had heard about in Los Angeles, Matteo had a hard time looking me in the eyes.After dinner when Dante headed to the bathroom, Matteo turned to me.
“I don’t know what you and Sato have planned. But if you touch a hair on my brother’s head, I’ll skin you like a goat.”
“Do you think you could stop me if we did have something planned?”
“How about I stop you now and not have to worry about it?”
With his hand under the table, I heard the click as his gun’s safety unlock.
Knowing that there was nothing I could do to get away at this range, I asked him, “Do you think Dante would ever forgive you if you did that?”
“Dante’s forgiven me for all kinds of shit. What’s one more thing?”
As much as I didn’t like it, Matteo had me. Trapped on the other side of the table, there was no way to get up before he could get off two shots.
“I am not my father’s assassin. Are you?”
“Maybe Sato knows he doesn’t have to ask you.”
As much as I hated it, Matteo was right. Every man I’ve been with for more than a night, has died. If my father wanted someone dead, all he had to do was get me to love them. Without asking for it, they would be out of the picture.
“If you believe that, then shoot,” I told him resigned to my fate. “Go ahead. Do it.”
“What’s going on?” Dante asked returning to the table with Matteo and me staring coldly at each other.
Matteo’s arm holding the gun, retreated.
“I was just welcoming my new brother-in-law to the family.”
“Was he?” Dante asked me.
“I’ve never felt more at home,” I said not taking my eyes off of Matteo.
As much as I didn’t want to admit it, Matteo had gotten into my head.
“I don’t think he shot at you?” I told Dante on the car ride home.
“I don’t think so either. And if what he said about Uncle Vinny is true, and he is back, we have another problem.”
“Sounds like it,” I agreed.
“You okay, Kuroi? You’ve been quiet since I got back from the bathroom,” he asked after I continued to not be able to look him in the eyes.
“I’m fine.”
“You don’t seem fine.”
“I’m tired.”
“Are you too tired to collect your reward for being good tonight?”
I turned to see the smirk on his beautiful face.
“Yeah. Maybe another night.”
“Oh. Yea, of course,” he said quickly retreating.
I wanted to explain to him that it was a bad idea to let me get close to him. I couldn’t be trusted. He had to know that. If I allowed myself to fall for him, he would end up dead. I was the Black Widow. That’s all I would ever be.
Parking, we ascending the elevators to our place. We didn’t touch. When the doors opened, I headed to the guest room.
“Where you goin’?” he asked as I crossed the room.
“To bed.”
“Aren’t you gonna join me?”
“Maybe it’s not such a good idea.”
“If Matteo said something to you, I swear to God, I’ll ring his fuckin’ neck.”
I looked back hoping to calm him.
“He didn’t say anything to me that wasn’t true.”
“I’ll fuckin’ kill him.”
“No, Dante. It’s not about him. It’s about me. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You’ve already had the chance. You didn’t. You’re not gonna hurt me.”
“You don’t know that. And the reason that you don’t is because I don’t know it.”
“Kuroi,” Dante said approaching me and encircling my biceps with his large hands.
“No, Dante. I kill people.”
“You won’t kill me.”
“I kill the people I love. You don’t want me to love you. Let me go, Dante,” I told him soberly.
Dante let go of my arms and I walked away. When I was alone in the guest bedroom with the door closed, I sat on the bed, lowered my face into my hands, and I cried.