17. CHAPTER 17
ZANE
Gods, my head spun fiercely. Last night didn’t go as I expected.
I genuinely wanted to talk with her before we had sex.
I didn’t regret it, but I had wished to lay everything out before taking the next step.
I experienced joy. I felt anger. I was confused.
I was worried. Any emotion I could feel coursed through me.
Joy in Auriella—that was everything I’d ever hoped for, everything I’d ever dreamed of.
Thinking about her and the passionate love we shared ignited earth-shattering feelings.
Anger and confusion mixed within me. Why the fuck did my uncle do that?
Did my father protect him? Gods, Auriella didn’t deserve this.
I saw it in her eyes—the spark stolen from her—something she would never regain.
My relationship with Alex might change forever.
He had been my closest friend. For two years, we spent weekends together, often finding each other in the quiet evenings to unwind.
I loved the girl he loved—more than merely love.
She was my Anam Cara, the vital core around which my being revolved.
She was unaware, but she held my soul in her palms. The fact that he had a nickname only he used for her ignited a surge of anger within me.
Knowing he had seen and touched her fueled my jealousy.
I had never experienced jealousy before, yet here I was.
I felt furious that my best friend had been with my mate.
Logically, I understood it made no sense, but my emotions overwhelmed me.
Cuddling with her felt entirely right and perfect.
I loved her deeply, but I couldn’t tell her because I feared it would scare her.
I had loved her since the moment I first saw her.
I also hadn’t mentioned that having our mating bond blessed by the priestess would grant us matching tattoos.
I wondered how she would feel about it, especially since she bore no tattoos.
In our village, it was essential for all Drusearons to get tattoos upon turning sixteen, marking their transition into adulthood and accepting their fate.
The Temple of Freya—the goddess of love—was where most people went to confirm their mating bonds, believing it honored the deep love between partners.
Priestesses in every temple could bless these bonds.
I guessed it depended more on which deity people worshipped than anything else.
Growing up as a royal child, we had statues of each god in our palace, and we were expected to worship all of them, each with its own special day.
As a curious little boy, I often asked my parents why we had to worship Marzana.
One day, my mother knelt down and explained that although Marzana might seem like an evil god, he was the one we should ask for forgiveness from and pray that he would not curse us.
I was cursing all of the gods when Remus knocked on the door, reminding me we had a wing to lead.
The Black Wing had always been known as a tough unit among the Drusearons.
Remus and I promised that we would lead it that way again this year.
Of course, our Platoon Leaders and Squad Leaders knew about this, as we had discussed it in our leadership meeting—almost all the first-year students were not prepared.
I suspected the few who seemed to know we would be coming probably had older siblings and received a fair heads-up that Black Wing started on Saturday, if we ended up starting the year on the weekend.
Most of them hadn’t been able to fly since the beginning of basic training because of the strict rules and peculiar tinctures prescribed at the start.
The tincture Drusearons were required to swallow, which blocked our ability to fly, was the most shocking and absurd experience I had ever encountered.
Some cadets deliberately swallowed only part of it or attempted to vomit afterward to reduce the effects.
It also prevented us from roving, if anyone had that ability.
The tincture was intended to last only two months, coinciding with the duration of basic training.
By week seven, I could fly very short distances and rove at length.
My father told me before I went that the tinctures they would give me probably wouldn’t last the entire time because of our bloodline.
Of course, I didn’t test it early or go anywhere in fear of getting caught.
I had never been to the brig, and I didn’t want to learn about it firsthand either.
We took the cadets out for flying practice and flight maneuvers.
Some had only learned the basics, which was obvious.
A few of them excelled and were clearly well-taught.
My siblings and I were homeschooled, and our father hired top teachers for our education.
Growing up, I hated the isolation. Now, I miss the one-on-one lessons and quiet time.
While my siblings could be wild, some cadets were more unhinged than I ever expected.
After training I knew it was time for a very awkward conversation.
I knocked on his door twice. Alex opened the door and signaled me to come inside. He looked upset, and I was sure Auri was the reason. I was about to make things utterly worse. No point in dragging out the inevitable, though.
“Hey,” I said.
“What’s up? How were the flight maneuvers?”
I let out a small laugh.
"It's clear who will need more lessons and who was well-trained. Overall, we're looking good.”
“I am excited to see what kind of talent we gained and see who won’t be making it to their second-year.”
“Riders, always looking to off each other…”
“Like you all don’t,” he laughed.
“Naw, just other branches.” I laughed with him. Changing the subject, because I might as well get this done with. “You look to be in a funk.”
“Mmm. Yeah, I thought seeing Ella—I don’t know—I thought we would start over…”
“Yeah, I need to talk to you about her—"
“Wait, don’t tell me you fucked her?”
I glared at him. “It’s more complicated than that.”
“No, it’s not. I have been telling you I love this female for a long time.”
“Yes and no. You’ve been telling me about a girl named Ella. Not once did you call her Auri or Auriella. ”
“And I told you about her unique tattoo, which you must have seen if you were—gods, she just fucks anyone, doesn’t she?”
“Do not be disrespectful towards her.” I could feel my anger rising, so I kept my shields up.
I didn’t want Auri to sense me upset or feel my anger.
I hadn’t realized before how deeply connected we would be, or that we could detect each other’s emotions when they became intense.
There was much my aunt hadn’t taught me.
“You don’t know her, like I do. When we weren’t together, she was out fucking anyone who would twinkle their eyes at her.”
I took a deep breath. This was my friend. This was my friend. This was my friend . I kept telling myself over and over because I undoubtedly wanted to punch him straight in the jaw right now.
“Shut the fuck up. I don’t give a fuck about the past. I care about right now. We are mated. You two—”
“Wait, what the fuck did you say?” His cheeks flushed, showing his anger rising.
“I didn’t stutter, and before you cut me off, I was saying, you two don’t exist aside from friends. She will never see you as anything but—”
“You mated with her?” He growled at me.
“You know it is more complicated than that. Mates are destined from birth.”
“This is fantastic. Fucking fantastic. My best friend is fucking my ex, and he claims they are mated.”
“No claims.”
“Has it been confirmed?”
“Not yet.”
“Then fucking claims.”
I rolled my eyes at him. I had never seen him this angry, this uncontrolled.
Even when we found ourselves in stressful situations, he had always remained calm.
I was sure this sucked for him, and I couldn’t say I had ever been here before.
I had many female encounters over the years, but I never desired a romantic relationship.
Knowing I had a mate was always at the back of my head.
Loving her the moment I saw her six years ago, I never let myself gain feelings for anyone else.
“I actually don’t give a fuck what you think. I am telling you, Auriella and I are mated. We are together. I am asking that you respect our wishes to keep this information to yourself, as we are not announcing it to anyone.”
“If you want our friendship, then you will end it with her.”
“Don’t make me choose Alex.”
“You can’t be my best friend and my—”
“Please, Alex. I want to remain your best friend.”
“Choose. Fucking choose.”
“Then it’s her…”
“Wow… I… Just… Wow… I can’t believe you would choose some bitch—”
My fist connected with his eye socket. I didn’t realize I did it until it was over. My hand throbbed with pain. He had a cut on his eyebrow that bled profusely. He staggered backward, his other eye wide and fixed on me.
“We are done.”
“When you realize what a fucking idiot you are being and you are throwing a tantrum, let me know. You have been one of my greatest friends.”
I left him standing there without saying another word. At this point, it was useless. He was lashing out and acting like a child.
There wasn't time for games. Things were happening behind closed doors that I truly wanted to start understanding this year. Having Auri here made it more complicated. I didn’t want her to be caught in the middle, and it was a distraction I didn’t need this year.
I wasn’t sure which professors were involved, but while I was at the infirmary and they held their secret meetings, I took note of who was present.
Thankfully, Professor Pascal was not part of those, which was another reason I believed they had something to do with whatever was happening.
Auri’s mom’s letters mentioned some kind of experimentation and advised against trusting the General.
Some of the professors in the group knew I was the duke’s son, which made it difficult to find out information.