Chapter 20 #2
“I know it’s not fair. But I can’t help it,” I looked over at her, watching her body tremble, shake, as she held back the tears.
“I look at you and wonder what he got from you that you won’t give me.
Why won’t you give it to me? I’ve loved you since I was twelve years old.
What the fuck else do you want from me?”
“You love me? You love me so much; you hacked into my life and have been fucking Heather behind my back?” she snapped.
“Because I still can’t get it out of my head.
Her mouth on yours. Or the way you sat there and let the whole fucking circle think you got head at some party like you were proud of it.
How many times has Heather sucked your dick? ”
I gritted my teeth. First off, I couldn’t believe these words were coming out of her mouth. Secondly? I was so fucking done with her thinking I was interested in anyone else. And lastly? Her fighting with me was turning me the fuck on.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” I growled, stepping so close our bodies nearly collided. “You think you’re some innocent angel? You bragged about cumming on someone’s face. You think I didn’t picture him when you said it? You think that didn’t gut me?”
Her jaw dropped. Her eyes flashed, wounded and furious.
“It wasn’t supposed to hurt you.”
“Well, it did. It really fucking hurt. Why did you say it?”
“Because you hurt me first! You let Heather kiss YOU!”
“I didn’t want that! She ambushed me. I told her to fuck off earlier.”
“Could’ve fooled me,” she shot back. “You looked like you wanted to.”
I ran my hand through my hair.
“I cannot believe you are still fucking doing this! I sleep next to you every single night. I protect you. I fight for you. I would burn this whole fucking world to the ground if anyone touched you, hurt you. I got a tattoo with you. I let the entire camp believe we’re together because you asked me to.
I’ve kept your secret safe. I’ve been killing myself, telling you that I’m in love with you, that you are the love of my life, and you stand here and act as if none of it matters. ”
Her voice broke as she shouted, “You think I’m not hurting? You think this didn’t gut me, too? You’re my best friend, Max! The only person I trusted.”
“I’m so far past friendship, Trouble. I can’t even see the fucking line anymore. I don’t care how messy you are, how many walls you’ve built. I’ll tear down every single one. You’re my home, Trouble. The only one I’ve ever had.”
She stared at me, and I stared at her. I saw it all over her face: her guilt, rage, heartbreak. We were destroying each other.
“You’re going to leave,” she said quietly. “It’s going to be too much for you when you really find out who I am.”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, Trouble!” My voice cracked with anger. “I’m never walking away. Get that through your head. You’re it for me. The love of my fucking life. Do you hear me? Nothing you’ve done, nothing you’ve lived through, changes that.”
I stepped closer to her.
“Is your brain turned on tonight? Because I have a message for it.” I cupped my hands around my mouth and aimed towards her.
“I can handle you. You want to kill someone? Fine. I’ll help you dispose of the body.
You want to light your house on fire? I’ll bring the gasoline.
You want to go on a secret federal mission?
Cool. I’ll dress up in an FBI outfit. I think I’d look pretty hot in it. ”
She cracked a small smile.
“You want to slap me, punch me, bite me, throw me into a river, I’ll let you do it, and then I’ll drag my ass back to you.
You want to run away and get married? I’ll be there at the altar waiting for you.
Fuck, I want to marry you now. I want it so badly.
You. Are. The. One. I want YOU. I want all of you, even the pieces you hide from me.
For the love of God, please, please, stop pushing me away. ”
We instinctively moved closer to each other. We were so close, our noses touching, and the fire between us was burning so hot that we were about to be engulfed in flames.
Her breathing stalled, and I could tell her anger was subsiding, replaced by a desire for me. Her eyes said it all; she loved me, too. My body was about to implode. I wanted to show her how much I loved her, craved her, and obsessed over her.
“Max… this is too real.” She whined, but it was more of a whisper.
“Just tell me you love me. Tell me, please.” I was begging now, but I had no shame in it.
I looked at her eyes, her mouth, her tits, and back up to her eyes. She licked her lips and pushed her hips into mine. I saw her take a few moments to decide if she wanted to say it, and then she looked right into my eyes, and I melted.
“I love you,” she whispered.
I hesitated, laser-focused on those words coming out of her mouth. They cut through my drunken haze and buried themselves in my chest. The rational part of me was telling me to slow down. I needed to take things slow. She was suffering from trauma, and I needed to support her journey.
But the irrational part of my brain woke up as soon as her lips parted, and her eyes drank in my body, and then she whispered again against my lips, “Yes, I love you. I love you so much.”
I blinked, listening to her voice crack when she said it, and then I snapped.
“Fuck it.”